Should Christians Use Dating Apps?

[RodColeman]

Did Paul say that? Yes.

I never said he didn't. What else does he say?

Paul didn't prohibit you to own a mansion or a yacht either, go for it.

Huh?

Still don't understand that a single person normally desires for a boyfriend/girlfriend first, do you. Go ahead, marry your AI partner or your pet, nobody's stopping you.

What are you talking about? Do you think I'm recommending that people marry a random stranger? Don't worry, Lovette, I'm not!

Also, don't you have to successfully date someone before becoming girlfriend and boyfriend? I thought you were against that.

 

[Lovette]

I never said he didn't. What else does he say?

Other "personal opinions" to you.

What are you talking about? Do you think I'm recommending that people marry a random stranger? Don't worry, Lovette, I'm not!

Then don't sell marriage to singles. Beggars can't be choosers.

Also, don't you have to successfully date someone before becoming girlfriend and boyfriend? I thought you were against that.

I'm against spiritualizing dating into a Christian issue, against using Jesus as a matchmaker. I believe it's a worldly, modern and stressful activity that has no place in the house of God.

 

[RodColeman]

Other "personal opinions" to you.

So the positive things that Paul says about marriage are personal opinions, but his advice for the Corinthians to stay single in light of the situation at the time aren't?

Then don't sell marriage to singles. Beggars can't be choosers.

Uh, there's a difference between marrying a complete stranger, and marrying someone you've dated and evaluated who's ready for marriage.

I'm against spiritualizing dating into a Christian issue, against using Jesus as a matchmaker. I believe it's a worldly, modern and stressful activity that has no place in the house of God.

So what's the "Christian way" to find a spouse? Wait for God to do everything for you?

 

[JohnDB]

@RodColeman .....

Ppsssssttttt......It's a troll...

Just saying

 

[RodColeman]

@RodColeman .....

Ppsssssttttt......It's a troll...

Just saying

I doubt it. He comes off as genuine to me. And I'm partly doing this out of sheer curiosity. And because my human side finds it kinda fun.

And my heart has a sliver of hope left. Although my mind tells me this is all futile.

I'm probably making a mistake, though.

 

[Lovette]

So the positive things that Paul says about marriage are personal opinions, but his advice for the Corinthians to stay single in light of the situation at the time aren't?

Then that's your personal opinion.

Uh, there's a difference between marrying a complete stranger, and marrying someone you've dated and evaluated who's ready for marriage.

And there's a difference between natural developmeng of a relationship with no ulterior motive, which may or may not progress into marriage, and desiring for marriage in the first place, then looking for a stranger to get married just for the status of marriage.

So what's the "Christian way" to find a spouse? Wait for God to do everything for you?

Each person has their own way, there's no one size fits all recipe - such as dating app.

 

[Lovette]

@RodColeman .....

Ppsssssttttt......It's a troll...

Just saying

I don't live under a bridge,

Just saying

 

[Lovette]

I doubt it. He comes off as genuine to me. And I'm partly doing this out of sheer curiosity. And because my human side finds it kinda fun.

And my heart has a sliver of hope left. Although my mind tells me this is all futile.

I'm probably making a mistake, though.

Hope for what? Write dating app, wedding industry or hookup culture into the bible? Or any new theology?

 

[RodColeman]

Then that's your personal opinion.

It's my opinion to note some of Paul's personal opinions, which he clearly labels as opinions in his own writing?

And there's a difference between natural development of a relationship with no ulterior motive, which may or may not progress into marriage, and desiring for marriage in the first place, then looking for a stranger to get married just for the status of marriage.

Well, in case you're wondering, I never advocated that anyone make a marriage proposal to a stranger you just met. I agree. That's a bad idea.

Each person has their own way, there's no one size fits all recipe - such as dating app.

But, presumably it works for some people, eh? Also, isn't it your "one-size-fits-all-solution" for every Christian single person to stay single? Even if they desire marriage?

Hope for what? Write dating app, wedding industry or hookup culture into the bible? Or any new theology?

I don't know. Maybe for you to understand some elementary principles. Like the distinctions between dating and prostitution. Or the difference between dating and sex trafficking. Or the fact that it's normal for lots of people to have romantic and sexual desires. Or the fact that it's OK for Christians to have general romantic and sexual desires. or the fact that people having those desires makes them normal and human rather than "weak" or "carnal." Or the fact that the Bible allows marriage. Or the fact that the Bible nowhere forbids marriage. Or the fact that not every person on Earth is exactly like you, or required to become exactly like you. Or the fact that being "content with Jesus" doesn't mean we have to purge ourselves of every other desire.

(These are all things that you've said here, as I recall. I'm sure there's some other stuff I forgot about)

Pretty elementary stuff, really.

Maybe it's too much to hope for, though.

 

[Snackersmom]

But just tell me, are you content with singleness or not? Yes or no?

I answered that in the very post you quoted, and in multiple posts before that. But it appears you are unable to comprehend it.

I had distant hopes for an actual conversation but I'm tapping out now. No point talking into a void. Hope you find healing some day

 

[zeroturbulence]

 

[Lovette]

It's my opinion to note some of Paul's personal opinions, which he clearly labels as opinions in his own writing?

No, it's your opinion to pick and choose which portion of Scripture is relevant to you and which is not. If it's just his opinions, dismiss it, don't quote him.

Well, in case you're wondering, I never advocated that anyone make a marriage proposal to a stranger you just met. I agree. That's a bad idea.

Yes you did, as long as you or anyone advocate for dating apps.

But, presumably it works for some people, eh? Also, isn't it your "one-size-fits-all-solution" for every Christian single person to stay single? Even if they desire marriage?

Presumably you still don't understand that a single person normally desires for a boyfriend/girlfriend first.

I don't know. Maybe for you to understand some elementary principles. Like the distinctions between dating and prostitution. Or the difference between dating and sex trafficking. Or the fact that it's normal for lots of people to have romantic and sexual desires. Or the fact that it's OK for Christians to have general romantic and sexual desires. or the fact that people having those desires makes them normal and human rather than "weak" or "carnal." Or the fact that the Bible allows marriage. Or the fact that the Bible nowhere forbids marriage. Or the fact that not every person on Earth is exactly like you, or required to become exactly like you. Or the fact that being "content with Jesus" doesn't mean we have to purge ourselves of every other desire.

(These are all things that you've said here, as I recall. I'm sure there's some other stuff I forgot about)

Pretty elementary stuff, really.

Maybe it's too much to hope for, though.

Well, maybe it's too much for you to understand that not all are born again Christians, and not all Christians are spiritually mature, and one sign of spiritual maturity is immunity to any graphic, arousing material, focusing your desire on God and godly things.

 

[Lovette]

I answered that in the very post you quoted, and in multiple posts before that. But it appears you are unable to comprehend it.

I had distant hopes for an actual conversation but I'm tapping out now. No point talking into a void. Hope you find healing some day

Alright, I don't even see your actual point besides your snarky editorial questions.

 

[Lovette]

Pretty elementary stuff, really.

Maybe it's too much to hope for, though.

I'm curious, what's gotten into you that makes you so relentlessly hellbent on advocating of dating? Despite my low opinion on it, if that's what you like, go for it, all that I'm arguing is that dating is a worldly, modern, stressful activity that doesn't belong to the house of God. Since you compare dating to eating a tomato, using smartphone and driving a car, you have put them in the same category, so how about leave Paul aside and treat dating as such? Since you value dating, marriage, romance, the whole package so much, maybe you should consider what your potential partner thinks and dictates - instead of what Paul thinks and dictates, don't you think? Pretty elementary stuff, really. Maybe it's too much to hope for, though.

 

[RodColeman]

No, it's your opinion to pick and choose which portion of Scripture is relevant to you and which is not. If it's just his opinions, dismiss it, don't quote him.

That's an interesting accusation, because you repeatedly emphasize the things Paul says about singleness, and ignore the other stuff.

Paul says it's good to stay single, but that it's better to marry than to "burn with passion." He believes singleness is best for him, and yet he doesn't impose it on others. He doesn't say that being single makes you "more spiritual" (or "less spiritual," for that matter. Paul says he has no "commandment from God" on this point. He says you're not sinning by marrying. Paul says that he wishes that everyone was single like him ── not that God wishes it. He says that he, personally, is content with being single ── but he admits that not everyone is like that. Paul "supposes" that it's better to stay single because of "the present distress," some crisis that the church in Corinth was dealing with at the time. Paul says a widow would be happier if she stayed single, but he admits that this is just a personal opinion. Evidently, many people are not happier being single. In 1 Timothy 4:1-3 Paul also condemns people who forbid marriage. And if Paul wrote the Book of Hebrews, then he also said that marriage is a good thing.

Paul says some good things here about marriage, and allows for it. Why do you keep ignoring these caveats?

Yes you did, as long as you or anyone advocate for dating apps.

Um. Wait. Hold on a second. Did you just equate swiping someone on a dating app with a marriage proposal? That is hilarious!

Presumably you still don't understand that a single person normally desires for a boyfriend/girlfriend first.

Uh, you can have the general desire to be married one day. That's what I meant. Or do you still not understand that? Also, do you consider it wrong for someone to desire a boyfriend/girlfriend?

Well, maybe it's too much for you to understand that not all are born again Christians, and not all Christians are spiritually mature, and one sign of spiritual maturity is immunity to any graphic, arousing material, focusing your desire on God and godly things.

Tell, me do you believe it's a sign of "spiritual maturity" if you're able to purge yourself of the desire for romance/marriage/sex? Now, I understand that you, personally, lack those desires. But perhaps I'm beginning to understand something here. Maybe. You don't have any desire for these things at all, am I right? And you think this makes you more "mature" or more "spiritual" or, perhaps, even more "Christian" than the Christians who do desire these things.

Is that how you approach this? Do you view yourself as superior to Christians who do experience these desires?

Also, where did you get the idea that "one sign of spiritual maturity is immunity to any graphic, arousing material"? Do you believe that becoming Christian means you suddenly. completely stop experiencing human desires, whether they're sinful or not?

I'm curious, what's gotten into you that makes you so relentlessly hellbent on advocating of dating?

I'm not "relentlessly hellbent" on advocating it. However, some people do have normal desires for romance/marriage/sex. I understand at this point that it's impossible for you to understand or empathize with these people. I do, however.

Despite my low opinion on it, if that's what you like, go for it, all that I'm arguing is that dating is a worldly, modern, stressful activity that doesn't belong to the house of God.

Well, not everyone's like you, Lovette. Nor are they required to be. Paul wasn't interested in marriage, either. But nowhere did Paul force every Christian to be like him on that particular subject.

What's your suggestion? Replace dating with young betrothals or arranged marriages?

Since you compare dating to eating a tomato, using smartphone and driving a car, you have put them in the same category, so how about leave Paul aside and treat dating as such?

I was making ana analogy. Also, dating has the potential to lead to marriage. So dating is a relevant topic. I would have thought that was obvious.

Since you value dating, marriage, romance, the whole package so much, maybe you should consider what your potential partner thinks and dictates - instead of what Paul thinks and dictates, don't you think? Pretty elementary stuff, really. Maybe it's too much to hope for, though.

Does Paul "dictate" that every Christian remain single forever? No.

 

[Lovette]

Paul says some good things here about marriage, and allows for it. Why do you keep ignoring these caveats?

Because singleness is the default status for everyone, marriage is a privilege and a distraction.

Um. Wait. Hold on a second. Did you just equate swiping someone on a dating app with a marriage proposal? That is hilarious!

I never said that. You're projecting your own mind onto me.

Uh, you can have the general desire to be married one day. That's what I meant. Or do you still not understand that? Also, do you consider it wrong for someone to desire a boyfriend/girlfriend?

I consider desire for marriage without a boyfriend/girlfriend naively delusional at best, obsessively ideological at worst. You still don't understand that a single person normally desires for a boyfriend/girlfriend first, and the validity of their desire to be married one day depends on their boyfriend/girlfriend's desire to be married with them one day.

Tell, me do you believe it's a sign of "spiritual maturity" if you're able to purge yourself of the desire for romance/marriage/sex? Now, I understand that you, personally, lack those desires. But perhaps I'm beginning to understand something here. Maybe. You don't have any desire for these things at all, am I right? And you think this makes you more "mature" or more "spiritual" or, perhaps, even more "Christian" than the Christians who do desire these things.

Is that how you approach this? Do you view yourself as superior to Christians who do experience these desires?

Also, where did you get the idea that "one sign of spiritual maturity is immunity to any graphic, arousing material"? Do you believe that becoming Christian means you suddenly. completely stop experiencing human desires, whether they're sinful or not?

Not suddenly or completely, but gradually and eventually.

I'm not "relentlessly hellbent" on advocating it. However, some people do have normal desires for romance/marriage/sex. I understand at this point that it's impossible for you to understand or empathize with these people. I do, however.

I do understand, the perfect solution for such desires lies within fictional works, whole genres, whole channels, created soly to satisfy such desires, the vast market and demand for these don't come from nowhere.

What's your suggestion? Replace dating with young betrothals or arranged marriages?

My suggestion is stop preaching it as a godly matter, and leave Paul out of it.

I was making ana analogy. Also, dating has the potential to lead to marriage. So dating is a relevant topic. I would have thought that was obvious.

No it's not relevant, show me where's dating app, candlelight dinner, wedding industry, hookup culture or any of these stuffs in the bible. Or any theology or church doctrine. I would have thought that was obvious.

Once again, I don't speak on behalf of "all" like you, I'm not telling you or anybody else what to do, if you're into these stuffs, go for it, just leave Christianity out of it. Jesus didn't die for you to have a date as much as he didn't die for you to tap of a smartphone.

Does Paul "dictate" that every Christian remain single forever? No.

Does Paul "dictate" that every Christian must get married? No. But you know who does? Whomever you wanna get married with, and perhaps their family.

 

[RodColeman]

Because singleness is the default status for everyone, marriage is a privilege and a distraction.

A privilege? Interesting choice of words from you. Usually privileges involve good things.

I never said that. You're projecting your own mind onto me.

Oh, good. OK.

I consider desire for marriage without a boyfriend/girlfriend naively delusional at best, obsessively ideological at worst. You still don't understand that a single person normally desires for a boyfriend/girlfriend first, and the validity of their desire to be married one day depends on their boyfriend/girlfriend's desire to be married with them one day.

I'm talking about the general desire to be married one day. You do understand that marriage involves many good and enjoyable things that many people desire to experience, right?

Not suddenly or completely, but gradually and eventually.

So, if you desire to marry, you can gradually purge yourself of the desire and stop feeling it? Sure, maybe if you're a robot.

I do understand, the perfect solution for such desires lies within fictional works, whole genres, whole channels, created soly to satisfy such desires, the vast market and demand for these don't come from nowhere.

I never said anything about a "perfect solution."

My suggestion is stop preaching it as a godly matter, and leave Paul out of it.

But, uh, Paul says some relevant things here. Are you leaving Paul out of it, when you quote the good things he says about singleness? (Which, again, are not the only things he says on this matter)

No it's not relevant, show me where's dating app, candlelight dinner, wedding industry, hookup culture or any of these stuffs in the bible. Or any theology or church doctrine. I would have thought that was obvious.

Alright. How does one get married, then?

I'm not telling you or anybody else what to do,

Oh, OK. I was a little confused on that point for a second, then, I guess. My bad!

Does Paul "dictate" that every Christian must get married? No. But you know who does? Whomever you wanna get married with, and perhaps their family.

So Paul doesn't require singleness? Interesting.

 

[Lovette]

A privilege? Interesting choice of words from you. Usually privileges involve good things.

Unusually, the goodness of this "privilege" depends on the goodness of whom you marry.

I'm talking about the general desire to be married one day. You do understand that marriage involves many good and enjoyable things that many people desire to experience, right?

Yes, go watch a Hallmark movie or read a romance novel, "good and enjoyable things" are the selling points. I understand that we don't live in the 50s and 60s anymore, we ain't in Kansas anymore.

So, if you desire to marry, you can gradually purge yourself of the desire and stop feeling it? Sure, maybe if you're a robot.

Nope, such desire will gradually purge ITSELF from you, it will naturally subside.

I never said anything about a "perfect solution."

The "perfect solution" for a problem is to prevent it in the first place.

But, uh, Paul says some relevant things here. Are you leaving Paul out of it, when you quote the good things he says about singleness? (Which, again, are not the only things he says on this matter)

Show me any of his quote on dating, even remotely relevant. Not marriage between existing couples, but dating between perfect strangers.

Alright. How does one get married, then?

Each person has their own way, there's no one size fits all recipe - such as dating app.

Oh, OK. I was a little confused on that point for a second, then, I guess. My bad!

I'm telling you to leave Christianity out of dating, and leave dating out of Christianity.

So Paul doesn't require singleness? Interesting.

Again, leave Paul out of this, since his words are just personal opinion to you.

 

[RodColeman]

Unusually, the goodness of this "privilege" depends on the goodness of whom you marry.

OK. And? You think there's no good people around to marry?

Yes, go watch a Hallmark movie or read a romance novel, "good and enjoyable things" are the selling points. I understand that we don't live in the 50s and 60s anymore, we ain't in Kansas anymore.

Nope, such desire will gradually purge ITSELF from you, it will naturally subside.

Maybe.

The "perfect solution" for a problem is to prevent it in the first place.

So you view romantic and sexual desires as a problem. Interesting.

Show me any of his quote on dating, even remotely relevant. Not marriage between existing couples, but dating between perfect strangers.

Well, he does say that it's better to marry than to burn with passion. And, uh, I don't know about you, but people don't usually date "perfect strangers."

Again, what all does Paul say, in totality? In 1 Corinthians 7 Paul says he has no “commandment from God” about this. Paul says that he wishes that everyone was single like him ── not that God wishes it. He says that he, personally, is content with being single ── but he admits that not everyone is like that. He says that it’s good to stay single, but that it’s better to marry if you have strong desires. Paul “supposes” that it’s better to stay single because of “the present distress,” some crisis that the church in Corinth was dealing with at the time. He says you’re not sinning by marrying. Paul says a widow would be happier if she stayed single, but he admits that this is just a personal opinion. Evidently, many people are not happier being single. In 1 Timothy 4:1-3 Paul also condemns people who forbid marriage. And if Paul wrote the Book of Hebrews, then he also said that marriage is a good thing.

Each person has their own way, there's no one size fits all recipe - such as dating app.

But, according to you, aren't all of these ways wrong, because they're "not in the Bible"?

I'm telling you to leave Christianity out of dating, and leave dating out of Christianity.

So, only apply Christian principles to certain parts of life?

Again, leave Paul out of this, since his words are just personal opinion to you.

Some of his words are personal opinions. But Paul does have some relevant and nuanced things to say on the topic, so I will not leave him out of it.

 

[Lovette]

OK. And? You think there's no good people around to marry?

I think there's no reason to bother with it at all, if you're truly content.

So you view romantic and sexual desires as a problem. Interesting.

Lust is a deadly sin.

Well, he does say that it's better to marry than to burn with passion. And, uh, I don't know about you, but people don't usually date "perfect strangers."

Then what's the point with your advocacy for dating app? Or any practices to meet perfect strangers?

Again, what all does Paul say, in totality? In 1 Corinthians 7 Paul says he has no “commandment from God” about this. Paul says that he wishes that everyone was single like him ── not that God wishes it. He says that he, personally, is content with being single ── but he admits that not everyone is like that. He says that it’s good to stay single, but that it’s better to marry if you have strong desires. Paul “supposes” that it’s better to stay single because of “the present distress,” some crisis that the church in Corinth was dealing with at the time. He says you’re not sinning by marrying. Paul says a widow would be happier if she stayed single, but he admits that this is just a personal opinion. Evidently, many people are not happier being single. In 1 Timothy 4:1-3 Paul also condemns people who forbid marriage. And if Paul wrote the Book of Hebrews, then he also said that marriage is a good thing.

Again, nothing to do with modern dating.

But, according to you, aren't all of these ways wrong, because they're "not in the Bible"?

1 Cor. 6:12, 10:23.

So, only apply Christian principles to certain parts of life?

Haven't I told you that render Caesar's to Caesar, and render God's to God? I ask you again, is the government Caesar or not? I've applied this Christian principle taught by none other than the Lord himself to an inconvenient fact, that a marriage license from the government validates a marriage, a church wedding or any other ceremony does not, why can't you?

Some of his words are personal opinions. But Paul does have some relevant and nuanced things to say on the topic, so I will not leave him out of it.

Than leave yourelf out of it, nothing he taught is relevant to modern dating. Do not mix the sacred with the profane.