Talking to Men - Women of opposite sex

[Heart_Melody]

I suck a lot at talking to men... or flirting in general.
If the survival of the human race depended on me flirting, well SO-LONG HUMAN RACE.

Help?

(perhaps this can be a fun thread for us to exchange some general ideas?

 

[tourist]

If you are a good talker find someone who is a good listener. If you are a good listener, find someone who is a good talker. This is the approach that I took and it works.

 

[17Bees]

I suck a lot at talking to men... or flirting in general.
If the survival of the human race depended on me flirting, well SO-LONG HUMAN RACE.

Help?

(perhaps this can be a fun thread for us to exchange some general ideas?

Actually, the literal definition of flirting is behaving as though you're attracted to someone, but for your own amusement rather than honest intention. You seem, from your writings, more deliberate than that, no?

 

[Heart_Melody]

Actually, the literal definition of flirting is behaving as though you're attracted to someone, but for your own amusement rather than honest intention. You seem, from your writings, more deliberate than that, no?

I never thought about the word's meaning - I mostly just mean if I am interested in a Man I can 100 not talk to them ever. I hide and I am scared to every talk to them so they don't know I exist. And probably think I am stuck up.

 

[NotmebutHim]

Doesn't happen very often, but you can try mentioning a guy's clothes, saying that you like his shirt, pants, shoes, etc. Doesn't matter if he's dressed up or in jeans and a T-shirt. If you do it right, he might elaborate on where he got his clothes and that might lead to other topics of conversation. Granted, most guys (including myself) aren't terribly concerned about our wardrobes, but it's a starting point anyway.

I know for myself that it's easier for me to talk to a woman if there's something concrete I can start a conversation about .

And if you don't mind me saying, I really appreciate your contributions to this forum.

 

[Heart_Melody]

Doesn't happen very often, but you can try mentioning a guy's clothes, saying that you like his shirt, pants, shoes, etc. Doesn't matter if he's dressed up or in jeans and a T-shirt. If you do it right, he might elaborate on where he got his clothes and that might lead to other topics of conversation. Granted, most guys (including myself) aren't terribly concerned about our wardrobes, but it's a starting point anyway.

I know for myself that it's easier for me to talk to a woman if there's something concrete I can start a conversation about .

And if you don't mind me saying, I really appreciate your contributions to this forum.

YES what a great tip...
Thanks so much for this piece of advice. I think I will try that out some time... <3

Haha my contributions. Have been kinda up and down recently. Sorry bout that

How's life? I like your Avatar btw where did you get that? (implimenting tips given lol)

 

[NotmebutHim]

YES what a great tip...
Thanks so much for this piece of advice. I think I will try that out some time... <3

Haha my contributions. Have been kinda up and down recently. Sorry bout that

How's life? I like your Avatar btw where did you get that? (implimenting tips given lol)

Hey Heart_Melody,

I'm doing pretty well; life is good. Even with this staying-at-home stuff we're doing.

My picture is of a paperweight that I got as a trinket gift for Christmas a few years ago. That passage from Proverbs is one of my favorites!

 

[Runningman]

Around here all you have to do is have hygiene, wear clothes that fit, not have face and neck tattoos, and have all of your teeth still and your chances of getting flirted with are high. Definitely easiest way to flirt is to compliment someone, it's really as easy as that. If they reciprocate the compliment and start giving you more attention then they like you. If you encourage that attention they are probably going to soon ask you on dates.

 

[Mel85]

YES what a great tip...
Thanks so much for this piece of advice. I think I will try that out some time... <3

Haha my contributions. Have been kinda up and down recently. Sorry bout that

How's life? I like your Avatar btw where did you get that? (implimenting tips given lol)

Doesn’t know anything about flirting my algebra!

Geddit girl!

 

[Heart_Melody]

Hey Heart_Melody,

I'm doing pretty well; life is good. Even with this staying-at-home stuff we're doing.

My picture is of a paperweight that I got as a trinket gift for Christmas a few years ago. That passage from Proverbs is one of my favorites!

Oh nice paper weight indeed!!!
Glad to hear you are well - yes this staying at home stuff is kinda tuff ain't it? But I am also kinda thriving... But I think I am starting to get stir crazy a little lol

 

[Heart_Melody]

Around here all you have to do is have hygiene, wear clothes that fit, not have face and neck tattoos, and have all of your teeth still and your chances of getting flirted with are high. Definitely easiest way to flirt is to compliment someone, it's really as easy as that. If they reciprocate the compliment and start giving you more attention then they like you. If you encourage that attention they are probably going to soon ask you on dates.

Well I got no face or neck tattoos, I war nice stuff and such but nobody really flirts with me xD Ever! Unless they are really, really old.... Like Grandpa material.

 

[Runningman]

Well I got no face or neck tattoos, I war nice stuff and such but nobody really flirts with me xD Ever! Unless they are really, really old.... Like Grandpa material.

"Grandpa material" LOL. That's rich. I get that, though. Older people like grandmas and grandpas are a lot more comfortable flirting. I guess because they know they are not going to be taken all that seriously by someone like you who is probably 30-35 years younger than them. I think they are just having fun. People in your age range are probably less likely to flirt unless they are serious because the stakes are higher and they might fear rejection. Really compliments are safe though and there is no rejection to make. Maybe there aren't many singles near you. Do you go out much? People need a chance to say something to you. Like if you always look busy or preoccupied people aren't going to interrupt you usually.

 

[Lanolin]

Lanolins tips. hahaha. if you want to be genuine and not insincere...

just say to a man you have strong hands and go from there.

Guys who have good hands are handsome or handy.

with girls you should mention something about their crowning glory which is their hair, or eyes, or maybe their legs (if you can see them)

I wouldnt say stuff about clothes. If you say stuff about clothes to a lady she most likely would say oh this old thing I got from the op shop and if you say to a man its like you are lucky Im wearing any.

 

[Mel85]

Guys who have good hands are handsome or handy.

Interesting perspective you have with mens hands. Lol.

Mens hands for me are one of many physical attributes that I admire. I do agree with you about clothes though, if a man was to compliment me for the clothes I wear, I’d probably feel awkward about it - I would prefer he’d compliment me on my intelligence or physical attributes, but each to their own

 

[zeroturbulence]

I never thought about the word's meaning - I mostly just mean if I am interested in a Man I can 100 not talk to them ever. I hide and I am scared to every talk to them so they don't know I exist. And probably think I am stuck up.

This sounds more like it could be fear rather than not knowing how to flirt. I've been there before. Rejection sucks and the simple act of showing interest can ruin a friendship because it's sort of like crossing an invisible line. That person might have never suspected that you were interested in them and now that they know, they might not see the friendship the same way as before... or you will get friendzoned.. or maybe it won't affect them at all. It's really a roll of the dice. I wish I had an answer for you. The only thing I can think of is the old cliche'... you can't succeed if you don't try.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

Just smile. Don't think too much. He is probably not available and it can become embarrasing and awkward but it does not matter. if you are afraid of being embarrassed, then you will never get out of your comfort zone.

 

[tourist]

I never thought about the word's meaning - I mostly just mean if I am interested in a Man I can 100 not talk to them ever. I hide and I am scared to every talk to them so they don't know I exist. And probably think I am stuck up.

That is where flirting comes into play as a subtle or not so subtle way to show genuine interest.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

That is where flirting comes into play as a subtle or not so subtle way to show genuine interest.

This reminds me of my high school teacher. She said "Girls be subtle" Why did she say that to the girls and not the boys? Is it always the girls who are not so subtle when it is the boys who are expected to make the first move? What is being subtle and not so subtle for you?

 

[tourist]

This reminds me of my high school teacher. She said "Girls be subtle" Why did she say that to the girls and not the boys? Is it always the girls who are not so subtle when it is the boys who are expected to make the first move? What is being subtle and not so subtle for you?

Perhaps a casual bump would be considered subtle. Smiling when you do this may be considered not so subtle. Hopefully, the guy would then have a clue.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

Perhaps a casual bump would be considered subtle. Smiling when you do this may be considered not so subtle. Hopefully, the guy would then have a clue.

I guess most guys are clueless that's why some women resort to the not so subtle ways.