The Complete Guide to Whangdoodles -- How to Spot them, How to Deal With Them, and Are They Really Just Misunderstood?!

[Charlesiii]

This is the 'French guy' you are talking about?
The one with the beret? Or is it someone else?

Yes! He's the one. RIP French guy (you can tell by the hat). I somehow came across him (and subsequently learned of his demise) after a discussion with Shittim prompted my interest about something else, and I stumbled across him during my search...)

"May my moustache be every preened and twirly", is probably how he would have phrased it. Although, sadly, this is highly unlikely, given his demise was via Whangdoodle.

 

[Lanolin]

Yes! He's the one. RIP French guy (you can tell by the hat). I somehow came across him (and subsequently learned of his demise) after a discussion with Shittim prompted my interest about something else, and I stumbled across him during my search...)

"May my moustache be every preened and twirly", is probably how he would have phrased it. Although, sadly, this is highly unlikely, given his demise was via Whangdoodle.

so what exactly happened?
I completely missed that part.

 

[Lanolin]

The monkeys in The Twits were called the mugglewumps.

mugglewumps - ugg boots - f-ugglers - ?

Julie Andrews published her book in 1974

Charles and the Chocolate Factory was published in 1964 - 10 years prior

It would seem Whangdoodles have been misrepresented by Mr Willie Wonka in the Chocolate Factory, their fierceness part of his Wild Imagination...when the Whangdoodles were more like 'We'll eat you up, we love you so!' because they mistook the oompa loompas for sugary confections.

It is not hard to see how delicious an oompa loompa could be. Sort of like a mini chocolate Santa.

 

[Charlesiii]

so what exactly happened?
I completely missed that part.

Something horrible. I wasn't actually around at the time, so you'd have to ask someone more masterly, like the Chieftess of Smashingness. But despite my natural aversion to most things French, it's a fate I wouldn't wish on anyone, irrespective of the degree of Frenchiness.

 

[Lanolin]

Something horrible. I wasn't actually around at the time, so you'd have to ask someone more masterly, like the Chieftess of Smashingness. But despite my natural aversion to most things French, it's a fate I wouldn't wish on anyone, irrespective of the degree of Frenchiness.

CarriePie?

I don't wish to speculate. But did it have anything with nuclear testing in the Pacific?

 

[Lanolin]

Or..frogs?

She kissed him?
He turned into one? IDK

 

[Charlesiii]

CarriePie?

I don't wish to speculate. But did it have anything with nuclear testing in the Pacific?

Yes. Carrie Pie, the Chieftess of Smashingness. But no, I think the fate of the French guy had more to do with Whangdoodles than nuclear testing.

 

[Lanolin]

The Whangdoodles kissed him? In France?

 

[Lanolin]

He was guillotined?
And his head was defenestrated?
Don't keep us in suspense!

Or, he was gassed in a French parfumery. Chanel no 5?

I can't think of anymore French endings. C'est la vie.

 

[Lanolin]

Gremlins

Who posted the pic of the Gremlins? the cute furry one, then the one with the chainsaw I can't unsee?
Well, they are not far wrong...as it was Roald Dahl who first wrote about the Gremlins.

Thing is, I always get mixed up with hornswagglers and vermicious knids. Unless they are one and the same, or just all monsters but named like different varieties of cheeses.

So if we have established what they are, what kinds of things do they do that are horrible apart from scaring and eating people/oompa loompas? Lions, tigers and bears do the same thing and they are now protected in zoos and wildlife parks.

Instead of them eating us humans, we feed them. If they are the enemy, then the Christian thing to do is feed them. Something even tastier than humans.

I have maintained that Whangdoodles are mostly misunderstood, like Steven Irwin tried to educate us on crocodiles...though he wasn't eaten by one, he got fatally stung by a stingray instead.

Is all this war on Whangdoodles needless then? Shouldn't we just leave them alone to get on with life instead of provoking or tempting them by being tasty? If French Guy was smarter, he would still be alive today right?

 

[Lanolin]

I resolve to get to the bottom of French Guy's demise

I will use my best forensic investigation skills.

So..what I do know is he was banned, I am not sure why, but I can guess the very last post he posted in the Banned Game he was on his way to questioning at the Beehive, and I surmise he got stung by the resident Queen Bee and her drones.

Who is the Queen Bee of CC then?

My first suspect was Magenta, who it seems has been here the longest and has the greatest number of posts. She also, since her longevity and social standing on CC, complete with royal colouring, may have the power to ban, in an advisory capacity to the moderators

Miss Lanolin had left for Norwegia by then but was last seen escaping the Broken Readers Prison with JennyMae who eventually returned to her small town Alabama roots, or mobile home. Miss Lanolin was definitely not at the Beehive when the Mosetarian eagles landed.

Kevin had left for his shepherding duties on the sheep farm in the South Island, King Mittens had left to take up residence at Jacinda Fishwife's fish and chip shop. Mrs Olive was at her homestay farm, collecting honey and olives with her homestay wwoofers.

Ruby123 had disappeared when the wildfires burned her bridges, and only Shittimstan was left....Mrs Santa Claus passed into Evereverland.

We don't want to cast aspersions on Magenta seeing as she never once participated in the Banned Game thread that we know of, nor did CarriePie. However GG has at times made an appearance with her clone moms.

The Chipmunks were never known as Whangdoodles, though. Mr Hairy had disappeared, and Mrs Hairy would not harm a fly,

So we have left...the 'evil guinea pigs' or rather the Possums Assassins or maybe it was a case of self-harm by the baby-eating Eagles.

My surmising is that French Guy choked on his gourmet frozen pizza. A fate worse than death!! Then his minions. successors or clones tried to blame it on the mythical Whangdoodles!

Unless...he drowned when the Titanic 2 hit an Antarctic iceberg and sank.

 

[dkontner]

If I was motivated enough, I'd change 'wabbits' to 'whangdoodles'.

 

[Lanolin]

There WERE giant rabbits, in Rubyland aka kangaroos. They were running amok, and the rabbit proof fence wasn't enough to contain them. They either bounded over them or got in through the gaps.

Rubyland also had crocodiles, and sharks. It sounded like it was in Australia, maybe it was the Southern part and was just renamed Rubyland, after Ruby123 had a bout of Rubyegomania.

She also had possums, but possums in New Zealand are a huge pest, people don't so much shoot them though because they are small, we set possum traps for them.

The only animals that are hunted and shot here are wild pigs and wild deer, as well as wild dogs that can eat kiwis.

After the Christchurch mosque shooting though, (where over 50 people died) the shooter was arrested. He was from Australia, and everyone here thinks he should be deported back to Australia. But the Aussies don't want him either. He's in a maximum security prison, and even the prisoners don't want to be around him.

Our then Prime Minister recalled a lot of automatic guns as thats what he used and had access to. I remember at various times a gunman would go crazy just shooting people, I remember Aramoana. That was super scary. Thankfully I do not live in the South Island where the farmers are trigger happy.

 

[Lanolin]

We had fire and earthquake drills at school but we also had lockdown drills. If a gunman was on the loose, we teachers and staff had to keep the school safe and hide the children out of sight. We would be hiding them under tables and chairs and behind walls, locking all the doors and windows (although bullets can go through glass)

I also can't tell you how scary it was to go to Northern Ireland and walk around Derry/London Derry and see the barbed wire, Shankill road, and the plastic bullets they used. And you'd see these murals, and the orange, green and white painted curbs which demarked enemy lines.

I imagine places like Israel/Palestine with their checkpoints and walls are even worse. Kids would throw stones over the walls, they learned from their parents to either attack or defend their territory.

 

[Lanolin]

I just can't comprehend war.

From a distance the world looks blue and green, and the snow capped mountains white. From a distance the ocean meets the stream and the eagle takes to flight.

You would not know that close up humans are constantly fighting over territory. There are some lines/borders you just cannot cross. Entire nations are split north/south, sometimes east/west, and often that line is arbitrary. Eg mason dixon line, 49th parallel, gaza strip. the DMZ, the Great Wall of China, partition of India/Pakistan etc.

I live in an island nation where there are no 'borders' except the sea surrounding the islands. I don't know what it's like to cross a border or have to defend one. But that doesn't stop people attacking or terrorising others for stupid reasons or no reason at all.