The Taller Woman /Shorter Guy and other Shallow Filters
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This question was my 'food for thought' during my drive back home. I think there are two things that contribute to it -
1) It is a stereotype that 'men must be taller than their women'. It is just social norms and practices that gave rise to this perception. Today we have adopted it as a rule-of-thumb.
2) If you are a self-confident person you don't need another person's worth to prove your own. It would be insignificant if your partner is taller or shorter than you.
However, there are some practical challenges in dating a shorter guy. Firstly, you would have to slouch to fit into pictures. And when tall people slouch they look bad. Secondly, would a tall girl be okay with not knowing how it is to nestle in her guy's arm or having to bend her knees if he goes for an impromptu kiss?
1) It is a stereotype that 'men must be taller than their women'. It is just social norms and practices that gave rise to this perception. Today we have adopted it as a rule-of-thumb.
2) If you are a self-confident person you don't need another person's worth to prove your own. It would be insignificant if your partner is taller or shorter than you.
However, there are some practical challenges in dating a shorter guy. Firstly, you would have to slouch to fit into pictures. And when tall people slouch they look bad. Secondly, would a tall girl be okay with not knowing how it is to nestle in her guy's arm or having to bend her knees if he goes for an impromptu kiss?
Hey hey, woman! I don't have a problem but I was just thinking out aloud! More like, seeing it from the point of view of people who DO have a problem with it.
I get called shallow for this?? Where is the Court of Appeals? Where is my lawyer? This is injustice on a short man!
I get called shallow for this?? Where is the Court of Appeals? Where is my lawyer? This is injustice on a short man!
Hey hey, woman! I don't have a problem but I was just thinking out aloud! More like, seeing it from the point of view of people who DO have a problem with it.
I get called shallow for this?? Where is the Court of Appeals? Where is my lawyer? This is injustice on a short man!
God invented the love couch for situations such as yours. Saves wear and tears on the knees. We all have 'problems' do we not? For myself, I am not seeking justice but rather, compassion and mercy. I will refer you to my lawyer, he is Jesus. He gives good advice and does not charge much for it. However, he does say to 'count the costs' a lot. Maybe he is referring to something like the line from the movie National Treasure - "Somebody has to go to prison".
Of course it could just be that in most places the average man is taller than the average woman, so that is what looks normal because it is most common.
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Raine
Guest
I'm really short compared to ALL OF YOU, who have named your height so far haha. I'm 5 feet and 1/2 of an inch (yes I take every inch I can lol). So I guess, in that sense, I would feel really weird dating a guy shorter than me because I already feel super short! O__O But I don't mind, I don't think I would enjoy looking at the tops of other people's head anyways lol. I feel kinda sneaky and fast, like a ninja because I'm short.
I have a coworker whose really tall at work, and whenever we get in each other's way, like if he is carrying a patient's food tray, I just go under, and he carries it over my head. See! Very effective haha.
So basically... I do prefer guys my height or taller... Hence, preference, not an absolute.
I have a coworker whose really tall at work, and whenever we get in each other's way, like if he is carrying a patient's food tray, I just go under, and he carries it over my head. See! Very effective haha.
So basically... I do prefer guys my height or taller... Hence, preference, not an absolute.
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persNickety
Guest
Weight is a filter to a degree. Build is one too. I don't like body builders, or arms that look like they would crush me if I got hugged. Thin and slim is in. So holla (holler? I dunno.. I'm white) to all you skinny guys out there. Tides have turned in your favour. I'm like Goldie locks- not too hot not too cold- just right. But yeah stronger than me, cus I don't want to be the Pop-Eye of the household.
I laughed at the 'popeye of the household' part.
Thin as in size-0 is definitely not my cup of tea. I eat a lot (like 18" of subway in one sitting if I am really hungry!) so I would like someone who can hold up her share of the plate. Plus, I think good food and good music are two amazing activities over which a couple can bond. Would you call me shallow if I say that she must be musically inclined and a foodie?
Oh, Pipp's playing it safe. She crossed the SHALLOW RING of FIYAAAAAA.
I don't know why - it looks like a burnt donut. Or a cupcake burnt that way....
It's totally in her honour
Btw Just Kidding. Hugs sistah and God bless you
I'm really short compared to ALL OF YOU, who have named your height so far haha. I'm 5 feet and 1/2 of an inch (yes I take every inch I can lol). So I guess, in that sense, I would feel really weird dating a guy shorter than me because I already feel super short! O__O But I don't mind, I don't think I would enjoy looking at the tops of other people's head anyways lol. I feel kinda sneaky and fast, like a ninja because I'm short.
I have a coworker whose really tall at work, and whenever we get in each other's way, like if he is carrying a patient's food tray, I just go under, and he carries it over my head. See! Very effective haha.
So basically... I do prefer guys my height or taller... Hence, preference, not an absolute.
Haha Raine. That's so cute!
You're a ninja. So.
You're excused from the shallow tag. Even though there's room at the shallow pond. You're totally not welcome.
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Raine
Guest
In terms of weight, hair, fashion etc... If they have a good and loving heart that goes after The Lord I'm all in! Lol.
But I don't wanna date a guy who looks like he's on steroids... Tells me that he focuses too much on his own self image. On the other hand, I'm not a skinny or scrawny girl either so I think skinny guys wouldn't know how to approach me xD. In terms of overweight etc, I would love him regardless but I would encourage him to be healthy to increase his chances of being with me longer.
Im not to concern about hair as long as he keeps it clean...
Fashion??? Pfftttt... I'm not into fashion so... If he was we totally would not match xD. It would just depend if he cares about that stuff lol.
Edit: I think I'm getting more and more shallow O:
But I don't wanna date a guy who looks like he's on steroids... Tells me that he focuses too much on his own self image. On the other hand, I'm not a skinny or scrawny girl either so I think skinny guys wouldn't know how to approach me xD. In terms of overweight etc, I would love him regardless but I would encourage him to be healthy to increase his chances of being with me longer.
Im not to concern about hair as long as he keeps it clean...
Fashion??? Pfftttt... I'm not into fashion so... If he was we totally would not match xD. It would just depend if he cares about that stuff lol.
Edit: I think I'm getting more and more shallow O:
My dad's first wife was slightly taller than he was, and a very clever and witty woman. On their first date, he was trying to be funny and said something like "you know, I don't usually date women who are taller or smarter than I am".
Without missing a beat, she put a sarcastically concerned look on her face and replied "well, you must not have dated very much."
Without missing a beat, she put a sarcastically concerned look on her face and replied "well, you must not have dated very much."
i'm just shy of 5'8" and like you rachel, i've always loved being taller--probably because i feel more capable and functionally adept, as a result, and for the most part, i've been given positive feedback about being taller from guys.
that said, i've mostly dated guys on the taller side, and so they tend to like having a girl closer to their height. however, i have an ex that was practically my height --actually i had slightly bigger feet than him too. : ) while his height wasn't an issue for me, he hated that i wore boots and heels that routinely made me 3-4" taller than him. and as a result, it only fueled my perception that guys don't like women to be taller than them, and it's also made me more cautious with guys in my "height range" because of that negative experience.
what i'm most attracted to in a guy has little to do with height. i suppose conceivably, a powerful basis for compatibility, chemistry and the like, can overcome much. the same with build and the other stuff, honestly.
what i care more about those things is that he's capable of being a co-adventurer. i don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone who is glued to a lazy-boy, in front of a television, or some kind of lethargic, mind-numbing existence that is only punctuated with work and sunday church.
sometimes build is more of a by-product of one's preferred lifestyle, and so in that circumstance, it matters.
that said, i've mostly dated guys on the taller side, and so they tend to like having a girl closer to their height. however, i have an ex that was practically my height --actually i had slightly bigger feet than him too. : ) while his height wasn't an issue for me, he hated that i wore boots and heels that routinely made me 3-4" taller than him. and as a result, it only fueled my perception that guys don't like women to be taller than them, and it's also made me more cautious with guys in my "height range" because of that negative experience.
what i'm most attracted to in a guy has little to do with height. i suppose conceivably, a powerful basis for compatibility, chemistry and the like, can overcome much. the same with build and the other stuff, honestly.
what i care more about those things is that he's capable of being a co-adventurer. i don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone who is glued to a lazy-boy, in front of a television, or some kind of lethargic, mind-numbing existence that is only punctuated with work and sunday church.
sometimes build is more of a by-product of one's preferred lifestyle, and so in that circumstance, it matters.
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