Those short relationships to marriage

  • Thread starter Thread starter apple
  • Start date Start date
  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
A

apple

Guest
So I've recently moved to the town I live in now. I've kind of been church-hopping, trying to find the one that fits me best, and I keep hearing stories about couples who have dated for just a few months and then get married. I know one couple who dated for three weeks, got engaged and married two months later.

Is that typical?

What's your opinions on that sort of thing?
 
Guess it depends on their values. My parents dated for a short time and were happily married for 42 years til my mom died. People can hide things from you for years or they can lay everything on the table and tell you straight up. I knew my husband for two years and my marriage lasted a few months. Everyone's different.
 
well some ppl just know when they have met the other person that God has made for them. its just a total God thing and they know it.
personally i wouldn't do that.
and if/when i get married my parents have this rule where they have to have a good steady job for 6 months and then they can ask me to marry them and then we have to stay engaged for 6 more months till we can get married. i think its a good idea to get to know the person really well before you marry them.
 
I don't think marriage is a good thing to rush into. But sometimes, waiting too long isn't a good thing either. If you're dating someone, and you know they are the *One*, I don't see the purpose of waiting too long to get married. I strongly believe in being friends before getting 'romantically involved'. Anyways, that's my take on it. I'm single, so I'm no expert on marriage... but I have an opinion. It all depends on the people and the situation.
 
I agree that if the person lays out all their things of the past you can move on quickly but noly if you know that God has created that person for you to be your husband or wife.If you take long to get married when you know that the person is the one God created and that God has told you that he/she is the one, get married,otherwise you will just put yourself in temptation. But I have found as with many questions we ask God, often He doesn't answer us immediately as we only give Him a finite number of options, normally a yes or no, but often He has a middle way or just a something He wants to add, like yes this guy is your man but he is not ready this as I first want to get all his attention focus on Me so he can get his spirtual life in line. So my opinion in when asking God for something be prepared for what He wants to say and not what you want to hear, as this will lead to a greater relationship with God and a more personal.God bless
 
I believe that GOD will do what HE wants. His timing is not ours. His ways and values are not ours.

I think when GOD brings you the person you will know it. And you will marry in the time and fashion God puts on your hearts.

Me and my wife married after 7 days of meeting - I purposed the way I wanted and got married the way we wanted and in the time we felt GOD saying. We just celebrated our 6 year a couple days ago - We spend 24/7 together and we worship and and read the bible, and go to church and server in our church in in the same department and also other departments.

I always wanted a big wedding - and waiting like a year from engagement - BUT when God had His perfect control of the reigns He took control and I give HIM the honor and dont regret anything the way HE did it. God rocks our socks!
 
Hi there:
I believe this is very subjective...it depends on your beliefs...but if we look into the bible, we don't see couples dating for years before married indeed.
I also think if you were really waiting on prayers and ask for God guidance and if you are spiritual enough to understadn Holy Spirit confirmation, you may be in the right decision to marry...as for me i could not possibly just date for 2 weeks and get married...but my parents met and they got married just after 4 months of dating.
So just to make this short, wether you take more time or less, the right decision is to have confirmation from God THIS IS THE PERSON AND THIS IS THE TIME.I FEEL PEACE!
BE BLESSED!
 
That's foolish because people don't really know the person before marriage. I would never recommend engagement til after atleast a year of dating. People don't really know each other after a few weeks or even months.
 
Baptistrw said:
That's foolish because people don't really know the person before marriage. I would never recommend engagement til after atleast a year of dating. People don't really know each other after a few weeks or even months.
Click to expand...

Well I dont agree with that, because marrying someone isnt about getting to know them the most out of anyone, its about LOVING THEM, so if a couple genuinely loves God and genuinely loves each other, go for it once youve told them all the crap you need to lol :)

GODS WILL SHOULD BE OUR LIFE
 
It is a choice to love somebody most of the time at first people are not in love. It grows and they chose to love one another! so learning more about eaach other will make the love of choosing ure future husband or wife easier!
 
Mel said:
Well I dont agree with that, because marrying someone isnt about getting to know them the most out of anyone, its about LOVING THEM, so if a couple genuinely loves God and genuinely loves each other, go for it once youve told them all the crap you need to lol :)

GODS WILL SHOULD BE OUR LIFE
Click to expand...


I never said it was knowing them the most out of everyone, but you should spend time developing a relationship so you can be sure you're compatible, and that it is the right person. People can put on a front for a few weeks when they're in lala land with their emotions, but after that, it's when the truth comes out. Take your time and develop a lasting relationship, don't rush in. Engagement is important, and marriage is something to take seriously.
 
I don't know. My friend wished for a Godly man to come into her life. Our Bible study group prayed and prayed. She met him and he was everything she wanted and needed. They got married within a couple of months. I think if God sends you the perfect mate, you know. Our problems come in when we mix God's will with our own. That's what I did--twice!
 
apple said:
So I've recently moved to the town I live in now. I've kind of been church-hopping, trying to find the one that fits me best, and I keep hearing stories about couples who have dated for just a few months and then get married. I know one couple who dated for three weeks, got engaged and married two months later.

Is that typical?

What's your opinions on that sort of thing?
Click to expand...

It does happen although, in my opinion, it's probably not a good idea unless you feel like you've got a pretty good idea of what you're getting yourself into.

If you meet a really good christian person that is absolutely committed to pleasing God and their spouse then go for it! However, don't ask for something that you are not willing to give of yourself. Ya' know...
 
If you aren't willing to throw everything onto the table right from the beginning, then there's no point in even considering marriage. Secrets have a tendancy to blow up in peoples faces, and rear their ugly little heads at the least opportune time. Usually when they will do the most damage.

That's when things fall apart because then both parties start thinking, what else is my partner not telling me. Then things go down hill from there, and there usually isn't anything that can be done to stop the resulting storm.

My parents are a good example of this theory.

Other than that, I see no reason why short relationship can't work as long as both members work at it and enter the whole thing not thinking "If it doesn't work I can always get out down the road." The second you start thinking that way, all bets are off and the relationship is over before it even begins.

That's my opinion anyway.

Sorry Kenora I stole your quote
 
from bible i think apart from Joseph and mary . most marriages were arranged and happened very quicl;y after meeting

It isnt knowledge of one another that makes marriage last it is committment and committment is love.

Sadly the church people get into relationships knowing there is an exit if it doesnt work, that isnt Gods plan. Even if you partner isnt christian the bible new testement says to stay together as you may be the influence that unsaved perosn needs

Love should look past all the lies they told during courtship if they do. or hidden secrets . so unless they are abusive you or were married already, is there really anything that we cant love through

Imagine if God said. "Hey you no loved by me until i know you for long time"

No Love is a trusting thing. we will get hurt, and we will hurt our loved one as we are humans and flesh is full of sin

But love is not just feelings. it is a promise and is evident by actions
 
Robertt said:
from bible i think apart from Joseph and mary . most marriages were arranged and happened very quicl;y after meeting

It isnt knowledge of one another that makes marriage last it is committment and committment is love.

Sadly the church people get into relationships knowing there is an exit if it doesnt work, that isnt Gods plan. Even if you partner isnt christian the bible new testement says to stay together as you may be the influence that unsaved perosn needs

Love should look past all the lies they told during courtship if they do. or hidden secrets . so unless they are abusive you or were married already, is there really anything that we cant love through

Imagine if God said. "Hey you no loved by me until i know you for long time"

No Love is a trusting thing. we will get hurt, and we will hurt our loved one as we are humans and flesh is full of sin

But love is not just feelings. it is a promise and is evident by actions
Click to expand...
Okay... Okay... Starting to see a pattern here...

So you are looking for just ANY thread where you can dispense your wisdom? And you feel romantic relationships is an area where you have vast wisdom?
 
Lynx said:
Okay... Okay... Starting to see a pattern here...

So you are looking for just ANY thread where you can dispense your wisdom? And you feel romantic relationships is an area where you have vast wisdom?
Click to expand...


no wisdom at all,. just interest as i stated in other thread.

only God has wisdom

So dont judge me by how you percieve things..
Ask for clarification if needed before making conclusions
 
apple said:
So I've recently moved to the town I live in now. I've kind of been church-hopping, trying to find the one that fits me best, and I keep hearing stories about couples who have dated for just a few months and then get married. I know one couple who dated for three weeks, got engaged and married two months later.

Is that typical?

What's your opinions on that sort of thing?
Click to expand...
My opinion is that you reach a point in your life where you know what you want in a relationship leading to marriage or you don't. Why waste precious years being tentative due to fear of rejection or commitment. Of course your OP is 13 years old but it is still relevant.
 
Robertt said:
from bible i think apart from Joseph and mary . most marriages were arranged and happened very quicl;y after meeting

It isnt knowledge of one another that makes marriage last it is committment and committment is love.

Sadly the church people get into relationships knowing there is an exit if it doesnt work, that isnt Gods plan. Even if you partner isnt christian the bible new testement says to stay together as you may be the influence that unsaved perosn needs

Love should look past all the lies they told during courtship if they do. or hidden secrets . so unless they are abusive you or were married already, is there really anything that we cant love through

Imagine if God said. "Hey you no loved by me until i know you for long time"

No Love is a trusting thing. we will get hurt, and we will hurt our loved one as we are humans and flesh is full of sin

But love is not just feelings. it is a promise and is evident by actions
Click to expand...
I totally agree with your last sentence. Love is faith in action.
 
Robertt said:
no wisdom at all,. just interest as i stated in other thread.

only God has wisdom

So dont judge me by how you percieve things..
Ask for clarification if needed before making conclusions
Click to expand...
Actually God will dispense wisdom to those that seek it to enable a more effective humble service to the Lord.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back