Thoughts of Christian Dating

[seoulsearch]

I was talking to a widowed sister last night, we believe one of our goal right now is to build a strong social network for older singles. Many things in life we need another one to help, major medical test procedures, car shopping, .... we will start with our local church, neighbors, a few singles to have a network to help each other out.

Reason is married people is hard to ask them for help, they have their own tasks.

Especially for 50 +.

This is awesome!!!

You and I have very similar goals. I feel the exact same way, and I hope you keep us posted on how building your network is going.

I wish I lived near you -- I would be very interested in your group!

Some of the other singles I've met here on CC whom I've known for years talk about one day moving near each other (we're all scattered across the country right now,) to do something exactly like what you're describing.

May God bless you for having such a heart for singles as they get older!

 

[seoulsearch]

This one needs a target emoji.

Heh heh.

I know we've already cleared up my airheaded-ness where I misunderstood @NightTwister's comment, but it's nice to know he's going to be my easy way out of this, uh, discussion, should I ever choose to leave it.

THANK GOODNESS I won't have to worry about ruining my rebellious, Jezebel reputation by doing something only a total wimp would do, like GIVING UP, or, heaven forbid, LETTING SOMEONE ELSE GET THE LAST WORD!!! CAN YOU IMAGINE???

WE DON'T DO THAT AROUND HERE.

No, no, no.

I'm so glad I can rely on NightTwister to give me a totally graceful and completely baddie exit by either inducing an immediate and VERY DRAMATIC heart attack (too much caffeine,) hiring a sniper to take me out (hence the target emoji,) or any number of OTHER creative ways in which I'm pretty sure he can come up with to give me a colorful exit from this thread.

It's nice to know I have a SAFETY NET when participating in such, um, conversations, because I'm not going out like some punk loser!

Thank you, NightTwister!

(I can't wait to hear about the aftermath in heaven -- "Well you know, Seoul would have kept going for at least another 40 pages, if that SNIPER wouldn't have picked her off last week... Bless his little marksman's heart...")

 

[Churchgoer]

This is awesome!!!

You and I have very similar goals. I feel the exact same way, and I hope you keep us posted on how building your network is going.

I wish I lived near you -- I would be very interested in your group!

Some of the other singles I've met here on CC whom I've known for years talk about one day moving near each other (we're all scattered across the country right now,) to do something exactly like what you're describing.

May God bless you for having such a heart for singles as they get older!

Amen amen amen. Must be holy spirit in us to reveal this to us.

 

[seoulsearch]

Amen amen amen. Must be holy spirit in us to reveal this to us.

With more and more people becoming single, I have strongly felt for several years that God is in the midst of raising up communities just like the one you're speaking of.

It's exciting to hear about others who are helping put His plans into action!

 

[Lanolin]

It is called a retirement village.
Or maybe a 'lifestyle' resort.

 

[Lovette]

Yes, I had guessed you were in your 30's.

That's part of what's been making what you say so interesting -- because I'm viewing it from a completely different stage of life.

I know you've talked about having to deal with "nasty customers", as you put it, at your daily job. I can very much relate. I've worked with the public all my life, and it's a bear.

My family is very frugal, and I saw what other family members were able to do, so from the time I started working in my early teen years, I told myself I was going to try to save as much as I could -- and get out of this God-forsaken rat race if I could, and as soon as I could. God willing, I'm almost there. But of course, I made a lot of wrong turns and had a lot of pitfalls along the way.

I married young, but when he left for his girlfriend, I thought my life was over. God kicked me in the butt and said, "Get up, just because things have changed doesn't mean you can't still work toward your goals." And so, that's basically been my life. Boring, but blessed. And still moments of adventure with travel now and then.

I'm here to try to help singles who aren't finding someone, or who never find someone, or who find themselves back to being single after being with someone, to hopefully see that life, dreams, and purpose doesn't have to end just because one doesn't have a spouse.

So you admit that "never find someone" is a real situation? Good to know. That's what Jesus is for.

 

[seoulsearch]

So you admit that "never find someone" is a real situation? Good to know. That's what Jesus is for.

Lol.

There's never been a time when I've said people have to find someone.

It's not "admitting" anything. It's observing what people go through, including myself.

You have a strangely narrow view of other people, thinking they all fit in the same mold.

It's truly baffling why you don't seem to have any concept of people as individuals, with very individual thoughts.

 

[Lovette]

Lol.

There's never been a time when I've said people have to find someone.

It's not "admitting" anything. It's observing what people go through, including myself.

You have a strangely narrow view of other people, thinking they all fit in the same mold.

It's truly baffling why you don't seem to have any concept of people as individuals, with very individual thoughts.

Because anything online these days are suspected to be AI generated, unless proven otherwise.

 

[seoulsearch]

Because anything online these days are suspected to be AI generated, unless proven otherwise.

It really is funny because many of the people answering you are single and not even looking, so of course they don't think that getting married or finding someone is a necessity.

But you seem to think everyone thinks that. When there are several people right in front of you who are living proof of being single and living fulfilling lives.

Yes, I'm starting to see that more and more here on the forum.

People accusing each other of being AI or only using AI and not their own words.

To each their own.

Over the years I've met about 25 people from this forum in person, so If anyone still wants to think I'm an AI, that's completely up to them.

 

[Lovette]

It really is funny because many of the people answering you are single and not even looking, so of course they don't think that getting married or finding someone is a necessity.

But you seem to think everyone thinks that. When there are several people right in front of you who are living proof of being single and living fulfilling lives.

Yes, I'm starting to see that more and more here on the forum.

People accusing each other of being AI or only using AI and not their own words.

To each their own.

Over the years I've met about 25 people from this forum in person, so If anyone still wants to think I'm an AI, that's completely up to them.

The definition of "fulfilling" varies from person to person. I can't affirmatively proclaim that I live a "fulfilling" life, but at least I'm always occupied with no regret, making the most of what I have.

Also, "single" is not an identity, it's a symptom of the identity politics and victimhood mentality, as though the world has wronged you, God owes you something. No, you're already complete, Lord Jesus has already found you, anything or anyone on top of his salvation is just a bonus.

 

[seoulsearch]

The definition of "fulfilling" varies from person to person. I can't affirmatively proclaim that I live a "fulfilling" life, but at least I'm always occupied with no regret, making the most of what I have.

Also, "single" is not an identity, it's a symptom of the identity politics and victimhood mentality, as though the world has wronged you, God owes you something. No, you're already complete, Lord Jesus has already found you, anything or anyone on top of his salvation is just a bonus.

I definitely agree with you that the meaning of "fulfilling" is highly individual. And I think even for those who do experience fulfillment it waxes and wanes -- at least it does for me.

The fact that you have no regrets and are making the most of your life is an awesome place to be.

For myself, I simply see being single as just a fact of my life, and nothing more. And that's ok, whether it changes or not.

Experience was my teacher. I had a husband who left for a girlfriend, then a while later, a horrendous relationship with an alcoholic, and so far, that was enough for me.

If relationships and marriage don't have anything more to offer than that, I'm very content to stay away from them.

We also have a lot of married people who come to the forum wishing they were single, because they're trapped in bad marriages.

Now course, I realize some people -- including my own family members -- do find someone compatible and marry and it all works out.

Everyone else in my family is married, but this is where God has me, and I'm ok with that.

The one thing we can all be assured of is that God has a place for us, whether married or single or on our way to being either.

 

[Lovette]

I definitely agree with you that the meaning of "fulfilling" is highly individual. And I think even for those who do experience fulfillment it waxes and wanes -- at least it does for me.

The fact that you have no regrets and are making the most of your life is an awesome place to be.

For myself, I simply see being single as just a fact of my life, and nothing more. And that's ok, whether it changes or not.

Experience was my teacher. I had a husband who left for a girlfriend, then a while later, a horrendous relationship with an alcoholic, and so far, that was enough for me.

If relationships and marriage don't have anything more to offer than that, I'm very content to stay away from them.

We also have a lot of married people who come to the forum wishing they were single, because they're trapped in bad marriages.

Now course, I realize some people -- including my own family members -- do find someone compatible and marry and it all works out.

Everyone else in my family is married, but this is where God has me, and I'm ok with that.

The one thing we can all be assured of is that God has a place for us, whether married or single or on our way to being either.

You know, the greatest challenge in this era of AI is to figure out what does it mean to live as a human being, in the image of God; what would you do when most of the previously decent jobs are relegated to AI, and nobody seems to be able to have a meaningful conversation without AI assistance, what's the purpose left for you in this bizarre era.

 

[RodColeman]

The definition of "fulfilling" varies from person to person. I can't affirmatively proclaim that I live a "fulfilling" life, but at least I'm always occupied with no regret, making the most of what I have.

Also, "single" is not an identity, it's a symptom of the identity politics and victimhood mentality, as though the world has wronged you, God owes you something. No, you're already complete, Lord Jesus has already found you, anything or anyone on top of his salvation is just a bonus.

So if someone calls themselves "single," or even expresses the slightest interest in finding a mate, then it means they're guilty of a "victimhood mentality"? And it means that they believe God owes them something? That's quite an assumption.

You know, the Bible says a little about singleness and the desire for marriage, but it never mentions it in those terms, does it?

If you're personally content with being single, that's great. Paul was also content with being single, but even Paul admitted that not everyone is like that. And Paul said that was fine. Paul even said it was "better" to marry if you have strong desires. Among other things.

Paul never accused those people of a victimhood mentality, did he?

I prefer getting to know people before rushing to judgment about what they believe, but that's just me.

 

[Lovette]

So if someone calls themselves "single," or even expresses the slightest interest in finding a mate, then it means they're guilty of a "victimhood mentality"? And it means that they believe God owes them something? That's quite an assumption.

You know, the Bible says a little about singleness and the desire for marriage, but it never mentions it in those terms, does it?

If you're personally content with being single, that's great. Paul was also content with being single, but even Paul admitted that not everyone is like that. And Paul said that was fine. Paul even said it was "better" to marry if you have strong desires. Among other things.

Paul never accused those people of a victimhood mentality, did he?

I prefer getting to know people before rushing to judgment about what they believe, but that's just me.

You're content with singleness, you won't desire a mate; you desire a mate, you're not content with singleness. Only are you guilty of victimhood mentality if you're convinced that you're not sufficient, you must find your "other half" to complete you.

 

[RodColeman]

You're content with singleness, you won't desire a mate; you desire a mate, you're not content with singleness. Only are you guilty of victimhood mentality if you're convinced that you're not sufficient, you must find your "other half" to complete you.

Well, the Bible nowhere says you have to be content with being single.

I don't know how many single people view themselves as "incomplete." But many single people have strong desires for marriage/sex, certainly. Paul mentions that category of people in 1 Corinthians 7. And his advice for those people is to get married. He even says it's better for those people to marry.

 

[Lovette]

Well, the Bible nowhere says you have to be content with being single.

I don't know how many single people view themselves as "incomplete." But many single people have strong desires for marriage/sex, certainly. Paul mentions that category of people in 1 Corinthians 7. And his advice for those people is to get married. He even says it's better for those people to marry.

Then don't. "He who can accept it, let him accept it." If you're not content, just be honest and not sanctimonious about it, and don't market dating as "Christian".

 

[RodColeman]

Then don't. "He who can accept it, let him accept it." If you're not content, just be honest and not sanctimonious about it, and don't market dating as "Christian".

"He who can accept it"?

Well, that's interesting.

 

[Lovette]

"He who can accept it"?

Well, that's interesting.

Well you're boring.

 

[Lynx]

You know, the greatest challenge in this era of AI is to figure out what does it mean to live as a human being, in the image of God; what would you do when most of the previously decent jobs are relegated to AI, and nobody seems to be able to have a meaningful conversation without AI assistance, what's the purpose left for you in this bizarre era.

The word for the day is indefatigable.

You have the constitution and persistence of an ai.

And if Rod is boring, why do you keep talking to him?

 

[Lovette]

The word for the day is indefatigable.

You have the constitution and persistence of an ai.

And if Rod is boring, why do you keep talking to him?

I don't, I keep dismissing him.