Why is the church so accepting of divorce and remarriage?

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Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
18,729
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#21
Just got frustrated today over things happening.
It's a difficult position to be in when one desires a thing, even a good thing, and not being able to acquire it. I do sympathize with your predicament. But sometimes we think we are ready for something, but if God were to give it to us, we wouldn't get the most out of it. This can be particularly true of relationships.
Something that helped me was when God opened my understanding to a higher degree concerning Psalm 23. Verse 1...The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.

It is possible to live in relationship with God wherein all your needs and desires are satisfied in Him. And I believe this is how God wants us to live--in total dependence upon Him.
The reason this is important relationally, especially in marriage, is because it is easy to depend on a spouse for things only God can provide. Expecting what only God can provide from someone who cannot provide it puts them in an impossible situation. Both will become frustrated. The one over not finding the satisfaction they desire, and the other from an unfair expectation. And rather than the relationship bringing you into deeper intimacy with God, it only serves to separate you from Him.
Pursue God with all that you are. Find in Him all you need. Who knows? A spouse might just follow. Am praying for you.
 
N

notonmywatch

Guest
#22
I get really annoyed at Christians who tell singles, even thinking about sex is a sin, YET, they have no problem with people getting married 2,3,4,5 times. Divorce and remarriage seems to be acceptable, but a single person even thinking about sex is a sin. Which is worse?
May I ask you a question?

You regularly complain about the whole "singles thinking about sex thing", and I'm wondering if you ever think about a woman in any other way than sexually.

Women have a spirit and a soul too.

Have you ever considered that?

I'm serious.

You seem obsessed with sex, and that's definitely not a good thing.

Now, let's see if you can answer my question without quoting a verse from 1 Corinthians chapter 7.

As far as the whole marriage and remarriage thing is concerned, there are a lot of professing Christians who are living in adultery in God's eyes. The church, to a very large degree, has failed to address that issue biblically, but God is still watching.
 

Eli1

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2022
4,511
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#24
Hey John, I see that you still haven’t made peace with these people/church who has unjustly ruined your relationships.
I hope one day you will forgive them so you can be free.
 

ResidentAlien

Well-known member
Apr 21, 2021
8,216
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#25
Sorry but this is not "my lived experience" to use the modern day expression! :);)
Just because it's not your "lived experience" doesn't make it any less true. People say this all the time to invalidate anything and everything. If it's not your lived experience maybe you need to get out more.
 

arthurfleminger

Well-known member
Aug 18, 2021
1,405
778
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#26
Churches accept divorce and remarriage for the same reason they now have 'gay marriages'. Because so called 'Christian Congregants' demand it. The congregants really aren't interestes in what God's Scripture or Jesus teaches. Sad but true.
 
N

notonmywatch

Guest
#27
Just because it's not your "lived experience" doesn't make it any less true. People say this all the time to invalidate anything and everything. If it's not your lived experience maybe you need to get out more.
scurred (1).gif
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
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Germany
#28
I think it boils down to some churches being extremely religious while some may be the opposite.
Theres definitely a lot of hatred toward divorced people too. Just as much, if not more than toward singles failing to maintain holiness.
So the real question would be what can a church do to reduce or stop that.
Imo instead of focusing so much on pressuing either party there should be more councelling and teaching how to maintain a healthy blessed relationships and prepare singles for a day to day life with a partner.
People are more or less told to flee into marriage as a escape from immorality but nobody talks about pet peeves and how to work out things and conflicts and how to avoid it from falling apart.
After all people are getting divorced often due to not being prepared or having wrong expectations and when the routine of day ro day life hits they dont get along anymore and rather be divorced than being miserable.
Theres many things people can work out if sensitized for the needs and struggles that come up with yourself and your spouse to be.
Thats just my two cents though
 

HeIsHere

Well-known member
May 21, 2022
5,715
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#29
Just because it's not your "lived experience" doesn't make it any less true. People say this all the time to invalidate anything and everything. If it's not your lived experience maybe you need to get out more.
I definitely need to get out more! :D
 

Eli1

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2022
4,511
1,812
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#30
I think it boils down to some churches being extremely religious while some may be the opposite.
Theres definitely a lot of hatred toward divorced people too. Just as much, if not more than toward singles failing to maintain holiness.
So the real question would be what can a church do to reduce or stop that.
Imo instead of focusing so much on pressuing either party there should be more councelling and teaching how to maintain a healthy blessed relationships and prepare singles for a day to day life with a partner.
People are more or less told to flee into marriage as a escape from immorality but nobody talks about pet peeves and how to work out things and conflicts and how to avoid it from falling apart.
After all people are getting divorced often due to not being prepared or having wrong expectations and when the routine of day ro day life hits they dont get along anymore and rather be divorced than being miserable.
Theres many things people can work out if sensitized for the needs and struggles that come up with yourself and your spouse to be.
Thats just my two cents though
Hey Demi, I hope you’re doing well.
‘Last time I remember you lost a dear friend.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
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Germany
#31
Hey Demi, I hope you’re doing well.
‘Last time I remember you lost a dear friend.
Not just my best friend. A child as well. Last year was difficult but by Gods grace I'm still standing
 

Eli1

Well-known member
Apr 5, 2022
4,511
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#32
Not just my best friend. A child as well. Last year was difficult but by Gods grace I'm still standing
Oh no.:cry:
Im so sorry to hear that. Big hugs and stay strong. You are already strong. Way stronger than me.
I hope and pray you have a great year ahead this year with health in you and all your loved ones.
 

listenyoumustAll

Well-known member
Jul 22, 2021
404
288
63
#33
I get really annoyed at Christians who tell singles, even thinking about sex is a sin, YET, they have no problem with people getting married 2,3,4,5 times. Divorce and remarriage seems to be acceptable, but a single person even thinking about sex is a sin. Which is worse?
Well friend divorce and remarriage is abominable to God . He Jesus is full of mercy that he's blood covers even to believer in the utmost of the to holiest of holy. It's written Proverbs 17:9 He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends. Only God is judge .
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
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Calif
#34
May I ask you a question?

You regularly complain about the whole "singles thinking about sex thing", and I'm wondering if you ever think about a woman in any other way than sexually.

Women have a spirit and a soul too.

Have you ever considered that?

I'm serious.

You seem obsessed with sex, and that's definitely not a good thing.

Now, let's see if you can answer my question without quoting a verse from 1 Corinthians chapter 7.

As far as the whole marriage and remarriage thing is concerned, there are a lot of professing Christians who are living in adultery in God's eyes. The church, to a very large degree, has failed to address that issue biblically, but God is still watching.
Because sex is very important to some, it's having the physical contact. Read the Song of Solomon. It's all about sex. Jesus and Paul were very clear, one of the reasons for getting married is to have sex.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,325
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#35
2. Secondly one should not discuss sex with others, since it is a totally private matter.
How do you propose that young people learn, if they are effectively forbidden from discussing the subject with anyone?
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,325
13,713
113
#36
Well friend divorce and remarriage is abominable to God . He Jesus is full of mercy that he's blood covers even to believer in the utmost of the to holiest of holy. It's written Proverbs 17:9 He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends. Only God is judge .
Yeah... we all know the Law is really good at condemning people. Obviously you aren't a pastor who has sat and cried with the abused wife or the legally-scammed husband.

When you develop some compassion, come back and revisit this topic.
 

NilsForChrist

Active member
Jan 31, 2023
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#37
The same reason for the acceptance of every false doctrine - a lack of discernment.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
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Calif
#38
How do you propose that young people learn, if they are effectively forbidden from discussing the subject with anyone?
That was my response to people pushing the purity ideas. Their responses were, "Be thou holy because I am holy" or GOD will work that out.
 

ResidentAlien

Well-known member
Apr 21, 2021
8,216
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#39
Because sex is very important to some, it's having the physical contact. Read the Song of Solomon. It's all about sex. Jesus and Paul were very clear, one of the reasons for getting married is to have sex.
It's true, sex is one reason for getting married; but if you read Paul's arguments for getting married, it's more about quenching lust and making people more productive for the Lord. The marriage bed is pure; but marriage is about a lot more than just having sex.
 

Pilgrimshope

Well-known member
Sep 2, 2020
13,878
5,622
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#40
I get really annoyed at Christians who tell singles, even thinking about sex is a sin, YET, they have no problem with people getting married 2,3,4,5 times. Divorce and remarriage seems to be acceptable, but a single person even thinking about sex is a sin. Which is worse?
sin is sin

“For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.”
‭‭James‬ ‭2:10‬ ‭KJV‬‬

if I do everything just right and then
if I lie I’m a sinner same as others I’ve broken the law of sin and death and now am condemned by it as a sinner bound to death if I’m cheat I’m a sinner same as others , if I covent I’m a sinner same as others , if I steal I’m a sinner same as others

the reason people do what your talking about is hypocracy

if I’m a thief I tend to look upon theft as not that bad but those dag nabbed adulterers they are really in deep trouble

It’s easier for me to look at someone else’s sin and pretend that m a judge and not one of them sinners

, than it is to hear Gods word and start acknolwedging our own sins a plenty and correcting our own behaviors that aren’t acceptable to God

airs always easy to see others flaws and it’s always easy to look right over our own

frankly brother Christian’s need to stop judging one another on any matter not only the hypocritical area your pointing out there

We need to be working out our own issues , we need to have that microscope out on our own lives examining and ways and even words asking if they line up with what we are preaching at other people

There’s a moment when jesusnis standing with a group of sinners many sinners have dragged one sinner out on the dirt and asks Jesus if they should follow Moses law and stone her to death


At this point the lord looks upon them and turns thier wyes of judgement for sinners directly upon thier own selves and as they all hear what he’s saying they turn being convicted of their own consciences knowing they also has sinned and broken the law so they all go away from thier hypocracy because Jesus in essence said “ look at your own self and your own sins “

that’s what all Christian’s really
Need to consider that hypergrace false doctrine is ruining Christian minds to where no one is willing to even confront thier own sinful natures and overcome through repentance and remission of sins