Greetings Lisa45,
Forgive me, but whenever I see the misuse of what it means to not judge I have to speak up. In Rom.2:1 Paul, in reference to the same-sex issue he previously addressed as well as with the myriad of sins that mentions after, the type of judgment that he is referring to is, forming an opinion and passing a condemning sentence, a desire for those sinners to be punished, when we ourselves are guilty of sin. On the other hand, there is nothing wrong for believers to form a judgment, that is, to form an opinion based on the word of God. In fact, we are supposed to make right judgments. Consider the scripture below as Paul is speaking to the Corinthians who had a believer in their ranks who was sleeping with his step mother:
"I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people—not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people. What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked person from among you.”
"If any of you has a dispute with another, do you dare to take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before the Lord’s people? Or do you not know that the Lord’s people will judge the world? And if you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases? Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life!
Regarding the above, how is it that people say "Judge not lest you be judged?" First, we are not to pass a condemning judgment nor should we have a desire for people to be punished for their sins, seeing that we are just as guilty and are saved by grace through faith and not by our own righteousness. Second, when we make a judgment upon another believer, we should make sure that we are not doing the same things or worse, which is Jesus' example of having a board in our own eye. But what does Jesus say, first take the board out of your own eye then you will see clearly judge your brother and help him with the speck of dust in his.
The point is that, Many people use this verse in an attempt to silence their critics, interpreting Jesus’ meaning as “You don’t have the right to tell me I’m wrong.” As Christian's we are to discern between what is right or wrong based on the truth of God's word, therefore we making judgments daily.
I'll use the "same-sex" issue as an example: If someone claims to be a believer in Christ and makes it known to me that he/she is living a same-sex life style, at that moment I have already made a judgment based on the truth of God's word that this person is not living according to the word of God. And with the right opportunity and right spirit, I am going to make it know to them. Have I sinned in making this judgment? No! I have made a righteous judgment, which is glorifying to God and is a warning to the sinner. Now, if after finding out this information I pass a condemning judgment upon them such as, "You're going to hell!" Then this is one type of judgment that I am not to make, that is, to form an opinion and condemn, passing sentence, for I am guilty of sin as well. Also, if we weren't to make judgments, how could anyone perform the following?
"My brothers and sisters, if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring that person back, remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of their way will save them from death and cover over a multitude of sins."
Regarding the above, it would require a believer to make a judgment about another believer who has wandered away from the truth in order to bring them back. In another place Jesus says, "“Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly”
Harsh, unforgiving judgment is wrong. We are “always to be gentle toward everyone” (Titus 3:2). And, as Jesus warned, “In the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Mt.:7:2).
Self-righteous judgment is wrong. The Pharisee in Jesus’ parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector was confident in his own righteousness and from that proud position judged the tax collector; however, God sees the heart and the Pharisee went home unjustified (Luke 18:9-14).