Cheer up m8 oneliners

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HoneyDew

HoneyDew

Senior Member
#21
Apr 30, 2011
2,333
375
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#21
Oooops, this is a cheer up oneliner thread....LOL sorry:D
 
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crosstweed

Guest
#23
#23
"I'd love to engage you in a battle of wits, but I don't attack unarmed people."

xD I've loved that one since the first time I heard it, but I never say it because of how arrogant it sounds.
 
GrumpyCrumpet

GrumpyCrumpet

Banned
#24
Apr 1, 2016
189
6
0
#24
"If you were any more dense, light would bend around you"

"Good. Fast. Cheap. Pick two."

"Someday I want to be the type of person my dog thinks I am."

"Politicians are like diapers - both should be changed frequently - Mark Twain"
 
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coby2

Guest
#25
#25
crosstweed said:
"I'd love to engage you in a battle of wits, but I don't attack unarmed people."

xD I've loved that one since the first time I heard it, but I never say it because of how arrogant it sounds.
Click to expand...
hahahahahahaha love that kind of arrogance.
 
Utah

Utah

Banned
#26
Dec 1, 2014
9,701
252
0
#26
She has a butter face.

Her body is nice, but her face . . .
 
HoneyDew

HoneyDew

Senior Member
#28
Apr 30, 2011
2,333
375
83
#28
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.
 
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AuntieAnt

Guest
#29
#29
Cheer up, Mate!

cheer up.jpg
 
HoneyDew

HoneyDew

Senior Member
#30
Apr 30, 2011
2,333
375
83
#30
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember the fire department usually uses water.
 
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AuntieAnt

Guest
#31
#31
The weekend is coming!

cheer.jpg
 
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AuntieAnt

Guest
#32
#32
Remember this....

cheer_up.jpg
 
HoneyDew

HoneyDew

Senior Member
#33
Apr 30, 2011
2,333
375
83
#33
Old people at weddings always poke me and say "you're next". So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
 
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AuntieAnt

Guest
#34
#34
Cheer up, mate!
kittens.jpg
KITTENS!!! That's all.:eek:
 
Utah

Utah

Banned
#36
Dec 1, 2014
9,701
252
0
#36
What are you going to use for a face now that the baboon wants its buttocks back?
 
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coby2

Guest
#37
#37
My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that 2:30am?! Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.
 
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AuntieAnt

Guest
#38
#38
IT COULD BE WORSE...........

trouble.jpg
 
HoneyDew

HoneyDew

Senior Member
#40
Apr 30, 2011
2,333
375
83
#40
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.
 
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