How Much Is Appropriate to Spend On an Engagement Ring?

[ServantStrike]

In India, some dads gift their daughters diamond rings as birthday gifts. If I were to date a girl who already had a diamond ring, I may have to gift her something costlier - in which case it would be upwards of USD 2,000.

I wouldn't hesitate to spend because I am sure she will be worth more than that. I could do anything, as long as it is not as horrifying as what David had to do.

Yeah...

You don't suppose a girl might want me to do something involving explosives do you? Because... if so she's probably the gal for me.

I'll set her world on fire (literally).

A hundred foreskins is pushing it though. I'm not... touching those let alone killing a hundred dudes.

 

[Roh_Chris]

You don't suppose a girl might want me to do something involving explosives do you? Because... if so she's probably the gal for me.

Well.. unless her dad has a problem with it. I don't think he would, unless he has a well-manicured lawn.

 

[ServantStrike]

Well.. unless her dad has a problem with it. I don't think he would, unless he has a well-manicured lawn.

That's the beauty of it. I can just tell him that I did him a favor!

He can plant new grass, and I finally solved his ant problem.

 

[Shouryu]

It cracks me up that four people have voted for the most expensive option. Of course, one of them was Angie, just to spite me, but still funny.

 

[DuchessAimee]

I don't ever expect to get married.


But if I did, I'd only care about the band being real so my finger doesn't turn green. The stone can be fake or lab grown. Whatevs.

 

[seoulsearch]

Yeah...

You don't suppose a girl might want me to do something involving explosives do you? Because... if so she's probably the gal for me.

I'll set her world on fire (literally).

A hundred foreskins is pushing it though. I'm not... touching those let alone killing a hundred dudes.

You're in luck. I only require 99 foreskins... certainly a much more a-peeling number.

It cracks me up that four people have voted for the most expensive option. Of course, one of them was Angie, just to spite me, but still funny.

Now I'm really thinking I should have made a "$6000 and up" category just for Shour and Angie.

No worries, Shour. You could always sell your rice cooker... and your car...

 

[Roh_Chris]

No worries, Shour. You could always sell your rice cooker... and your car...

And his sqaut rack...

 

[MiaH]

You're in luck. I only require 99 foreskins... certainly a much more a-peeling number.

oh my, ouch, that has got to hurt, more than your wallet.

How does one require more than 99 foreskins? *palms her face* Sounds so wrong hahahaha.

 

[NukePooch]

I'm going to go on a bit of a hijack here...

I would be more comfortable agreeing to an expensive ring than to agree to an expensive wedding ceremony.

I have issues with the amount of money that is spent on most weddings these days....My old boss took out loans and maxed credit cards to give his daughter her 'dream wedding'... Last I heard, the cost was over $60K...and it was all over in one evening.

 

[Olerica]

I'm in agreement with you, NukePooch. I'd rather elope and then have a party where it's all relaxed.

 

[NukePooch]

You're in luck. I only require 99 foreskins... certainly a much more a-peeling number.

I...I have no response to that.


[video=youtube;x-aTQsBVQug]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-aTQsBVQug[/video]

 

[Olerica]

Did you just Joe vs. The Volcano SeoulSearch? ROFL.

 

[NukePooch]

Well Seoul knows my shenanigans...
I'm a true professional. I can come up with sarcasm for any occasion within a moment's notice.

But she's got me stymied with the foreskin comment.


(The real shocker is that someone else besides me knows that movie.)

 

[Angela53510]

Back when my husband and I got married, we had $0 and no prospects for improving on that till I finished my teacher's degree. Somehow, I managed to get a lovely $300 gold band with 3 little diamonds in it. I loved that ring. Hubby never got a ring at all.

Sadly, one morning about 20 years ago, we went to church on Sunday morning and left the house open. I didn't always wear my band because of fingers that would swell up at night. You guessed it! The band was stolen. I found another ring in a pawn shop that was virtually identical, other than the engraved initials which didn't belong to either of us.

Then I lost that ring, got another one from a pawn shop. At that point, we had 4 kids, and the mortgage wasn't paid, so a third ring was not a priority, just something to say I was married.

Then, at our 25th wedding anniversary, my husband decided he wanted a band, white gold and plain. So we went out and bought two matching rings for about $200. Did I mention my husband was pretty cheap?

Along comes our 30th anniversary. The children are finally grown, the mortgage is paid. I finally asked for my engagement ring. Mr. Practical couldn't understand why I needed an engagement ring 30 years later. But he agreed to pay for it. My daughter and I went shopping for it. We picked out a high quality Canadian diamond. It had a simple band that matched the white gold ring. It is gorgeous.

When I got my ring, I was showing it off to all my Christian lady friends, none of whom had an engagement ring either! Hubby said he finally understood what an engagement ring was all about, and he was glad he bought it. Cost $6000. I guess that is the plus $3000 category.

Moral of this story. Stay together, pay off your debts and you will get an awesome ring one day!

 

[seoulsearch]

Well Seoul knows my shenanigans...
I'm a true professional. I can come up with sarcasm for any occasion within a moment's notice.

But she's got me stymied with the foreskin comment.

And believe me, folks, that isn't easy to do.

I just feel like I reached major milestone here!!

On a serious note, I agree with Nuke, Oncefallen, and others who've said it's not worth the cost for either the ring and/or the wedding if you have to take out loans or are spending beyond your means.

You have to think of it this way: if you walked into a store with a big sign that said, "Everything On Sale Now!!! All Prices Are Now 22% HIGHER!!!"

Yes, you read that right. And that's exactly what you're doing if you buy anything with a credit card that you can't pay off at the end of the month. You're paying 20% (or whatever your card's going rate is) MORE than the price featured in the store, and even MORE on top of that if you can't pay it off and the interest keeps accumulating on what you owe.

This is just my own opinion and how I've been raised, but for my own personal self, there isn't any "dream wedding" or ring that's worth 10 years of bills to pay off.

Plus... I'm not trying to sound negative here but so many marriages don't survive. I'm certainly NOT trying to say, "Plan your wedding as if it won't last long," but... I know several people who have spent $20,000 they can't afford on rings and weddings and then the marriage lasted less, let's say, 2 years.

Angela, LOVED your story!!! Thank you so much for sharing!!!

 

[maxwel]

Back when my husband and I got married, we had $0 and no prospects for improving on that till I finished my teacher's degree. Somehow, I managed to get a lovely $300 gold band with 3 little diamonds in it. I loved that ring. Hubby never got a ring at all.

Sadly, one morning about 20 years ago, we went to church on Sunday morning and left the house open. I didn't always wear my band because of fingers that would swell up at night. You guessed it! The band was stolen. I found another ring in a pawn shop that was virtually identical, other than the engraved initials which didn't belong to either of us.

Then I lost that ring, got another one from a pawn shop. At that point, we had 4 kids, and the mortgage wasn't paid, so a third ring was not a priority, just something to say I was married.

Then, at our 25th wedding anniversary, my husband decided he wanted a band, white gold and plain. So we went out and bought two matching rings for about $200. Did I mention my husband was pretty cheap?

Along comes our 30th anniversary. The children are finally grown, the mortgage is paid. I finally asked for my engagement ring. Mr. Practical couldn't understand why I needed an engagement ring 30 years later. But he agreed to pay for it. My daughter and I went shopping for it. We picked out a high quality Canadian diamond. It had a simple band that matched the white gold ring. It is gorgeous.

When I got my ring, I was showing it off to all my Christian lady friends, none of whom had an engagement ring either! Hubby said he finally understood what an engagement ring was all about, and he was glad he bought it. Cost $6000. I guess that is the plus $3000 category.

Moral of this story. Stay together, pay off your debts and you will get an awesome ring one day!

I wasn't wearing my glasses, and I thought you said your 300th anniversary.

That's some serious commitment.

: )

 

[Grace-Like-Rain]

but... I know several people who have spent $20,000 they can't afford on rings and weddings and then the marriage lasted less, let's say, 2 years.

You have to wonder if the two are actually related, you know? I mean... money issues are one of the top three reasons couples fight. And spending $20k on a wedding or rings is definitely going to cause money problems, unless you're a millionaire. The WILLINGNESS to spend that much kind of shows that there might be spending habits that will cause further issues down the line as well.

 

[Roh_Chris]

You have to wonder if the two are actually related, you know? I mean... money issues are one of the top three reasons couples fight. And spending $20k on a wedding or rings is definitely going to cause money problems, unless you're a millionaire. The WILLINGNESS to spend that much kind of shows that there might be spending habits that will cause further issues down the line as well.

That is not a big amount, honestly. In India, wedding expenses usually start at USD 20,000. If you include the wedding wear and the dresses & hotel arrangements for the close guests (which also have to be borne by the couple and their parents), it can even cross USD 50,000. Among my friends who got married, the most expensive one was for USD 80,000. Her diamond necklace alone cost a couple of thousands.

Usually, the wedding expenses are borne by the groom and his parents while the expenses for the reception are borne by the bride and her parents.

Granted it causes a lot of heartbearn to see that money go down the drain in guests who may not even be thankful, but that's the irony of our society - we pay an impressive amount of money to impress people who need not be impressed.

 

[jsr1221]

I don't think it should matter what the price is. Sure, you can't go to a machine and pull out one of those fake 25 cent plastic rings. At the same time, I think it's unrealistic for women to be expecting you to spend thousands upon thousands of dollars for said thing. Maybe it's just me and I'm in the minority, but if she loves you enough to when you do propose, the cost and make up of the ring isn't going to be a deal breaker. I think it's a superficial thing. Again, I'm probably in the minority feeling this way.

 

[seoulsearch]

Jsr--I totally agree with you but I know people's opinions differ. And they can change over time. When I was younger I at least wanted a sizable diamond ring.

When I did get married, my ring cost $100, my dress cost $100, and the wedding cost $2500.

Roh_Chris brought up a most excellent point--so many times in today's society, people make the wedding out to be more about showing off how much money they supposedly have than celebrating a lifetime commitment.

I think people see weddings as their ultimate Facebook Page, and they want people to be impressed by how well they've done (whether or not it's actually real or if they can afford it.)