Single Men It's Time to Step Up!

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
A

AgeofKnowledge

Guest
You're introducing a red herring into the discussion which deserves its own thread. But since you brought it up, older genuinely Christian men are NOT visiting the Philippines to engage in sex trafficking and prostitution anymore than you are.

And you said "never." False. The men at my church are involved in Christian anti-sex trafficking ministries. In fact, it's a very popular ministry with both Christian men and women right now around the nation. Interestingly, a few of them have married foreign women as a result of their involvement abroad in that ministry.

Starting to see the problem yet? Genuine Christian men are not engaging in sex trafficking and prostitution but rather joining ministries to help bring an end to the problem.

The number one offender is Filipino men. This makes sense, of course, as they live there and are fully acclimated to the culture. The number two offender is non-Western Asian men with the Japanese, Koreans, and Chinese being the worst of these and also the number one foreign offender demographic for trafficking. Trailing behind are Westerners.

But it's a red herring like I said, because men who travel abroad looking to marry a woman and start a family without the baggage of feminism and the high rate of divorce and punitive consequences that result from it in Western nations are not engaging in sex trafficking and prostitution. Meaning, of course, that it's a fallacious correlation that really doesn't belong in this discussion.


When older men mention the P.I. (Philippines) as a place to scout for beautiful young brides, why do they also never mention things such as sex trafficking (young girls being sold by their own families) and the fact that many of those beautiful young Pinoy women are looking for a means of survival, both for them and their families?

As with any place, not everyone is like that, but the family I was married into was 3/4 Filipino and lived in the Philippines as well. My then-husband was watching a talk show in which the P.I. was being criticized for prostituting its young girls and looking to American and European men as cash cows.

The native Filipinos on the show were visibly shaken, and my ex-husband, who is half Filipino and was raised there all his life, said, "Why in the world are those people getting upset? It's not like they can argue because it's all true!"

I just think it's crazy that so many times here on CC, one extreme will be mentioned... but not all the things that go along with it. I am certainly not trying to slam the P.I. or its people, BUT, I think it's important to keep a balanced view and older men tend to only mention all the "benefits." ("Grandpa's With Benefits" instead of "Friends With Benefits"...)

In other words, sure, the P.I. CAN be a great place to find a child-aged wife.

It's also a great draw for pedophiles as well.

And of COURSE a woman in a very poor country typically isn't going to divorce her foreign husband. He's paying for her and her family to survive.
 
A

AgeofKnowledge

Guest
One of my friends at church married an woman from India. They live there now and have a unique ministry that teaches poor Indians that want to start a new micro-business how to do so with biblical principles and provide grants (not loans) to help them do it :).

She obviously didn't find him creepy ;). Probably me though... lol.


So glad that India is not mentioned ! ;)


PS - We have the lowest divorce rates in the world [0.30 in 2011] and we have awesome weddings, where everyone dances and there's a lot of fun and fanfare.


We clearly don't like just about any western men and we tend to be wary around older western men (they may be considered creepy)
 
B

biscuit

Guest
You're introducing a red herring into the discussion which deserves its own thread. But since you brought it up, older genuinely Christian men are NOT visiting the Philippines to engage in sex trafficking and prostitution anymore than you are.

And you said "never." False. The men at my church are involved in Christian anti-sex trafficking ministries. In fact, it's a very popular ministry with both Christian men and women right now around the nation. Interestingly, a few of them have married foreign women as a result of their involvement abroad in that ministry.

Starting to see the problem yet? Genuine Christian men are not engaging in sex trafficking and prostitution but rather joining ministries to help bring an end to the problem.

The number one offender is Filipino men. This makes sense, of course, as they live there and are fully acclimated to the culture. The number two offender is non-Western Asian men with the Japanese, Koreans, and Chinese being the worst of these and also the number one foreign offender demographic for trafficking. Trailing behind are Westerners.

But it's a red herring like I said, because men who travel abroad looking to marry a woman and start a family without the baggage of feminism and the high rate of divorce and punitive consequences that result from it in Western nations are not engaging in sex trafficking and prostitution. Meaning, of course, that it's a fallacious correlation that really doesn't belong in this discussion.
Bingo !!!!! Many Westerners' women are jealous of the available options older westerner men have.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,432
5,379
113
When I said, "Never", I was talking about this forum. I've seen the idea of finding brides in these countries brought up often in the Singles forum over the years, but I can't remember ever seeing the same men bringing up the subject also talking about the dark side of the issue. I disagree that it Filipino men are primarily to blame, but will refrain, as it's pointless to argue here. I just find it interesting that whenever you bring up the point of Filipino brides (and I've seen you mention it in the threads several times), you never point out that it's a poor country with many people looking for a way out, including a Western husband.

One of the reasons my ex-father-in-law stayed in the P.I. is because he could afford to have a house custom-built that took up 3 blocks, all on an American teacher's salary. Anyone out there is free to correct my stats but in 1997 (when I was married into this family), I was told that a person could live in the P.I. for about $5000 American dollars a year. Again, I could be wrong. But it doesn't take much to raise one's eyebrows at the difference in cultural and monetary dynamics...

As far as a red herring goes, yes indeed.

I often see the subject of Filipino brides brought up in threads that have nothing to do with the subject of the thread, such as here... which can, in this sense, make the topic a red herring in and of itself.

My interest is simply that when a topic such as this is brought up, so are the issues that people want to sweep under the rug. Such as "the good old days" when couples supposedly stayed together... Yes, they stayed together.

The children of those generations who went through years of physical and sexual abuse that never talked about because families stayed together "for the kids" are living proof. (I say this as someone who has had friends who wished their parents would have divorced in order to get them away from such situations.)

As I said, talking about the "good old days" and beautiful young submissive brides from other countries is fine... I just ask that we also talk about the things people don't want to talk about to keep it realistic.

And why would I be jealous when I have plenty of my own options?
One of them being, living a single, independent life.

And why would older Western men have more options than what women would have unless they are buying them? I certainly don't feel that they are at much more of an advantage. But if they feel that way, I'm sure God will lead them to their options.

I know that you (Age and Biscuit) feel that you have unlimited options--God bless you in whatever He has for you.
 
Last edited:

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,432
5,379
113
And when "options" are spoken of, yes, I will agree with you about that.

My ex-father-in-law worked as a teacher in a part of the P.I. that was heavily populated with American families. The Americans came there to live and work, raising their families in the Philippines, and he taught their children in his high school classes.

Ten to twenty years later, he taught their "second families" as well, seeing as a high percentage of the aging American men had noticed their "options", left their American wives, were now married to Filipino women, and now had an entirely new set of children going through the school system.
 
Last edited:
A

AgeofKnowledge

Guest
The issue continues to arise because moral Christian men WANT marriage WITHOUT the HIGH risk and COLOSSAL negative consequences of divorce that presently occurs 40 to 50 percent of the time for first marriages and which are much higher for subsequent marriages in nations like the U.S..

^ Sex trafficking and whore mongering have nothing to do with this. That's why you're not seeing Christian men suddenly veer off topic to bring up sex trafficking and prostitution.

And I never said Filipino men were to blame for those foreigners who travel to the Philippines with bad intent. What I said is the number one customer for prostitution in the Philippines is Filipino men.

You are; however, correct that Filipino men do not frequent sex workers as much as men do in many other countries. Consider Cambodia, for example, where the percentage of Cambodian men that visit Cambodian prostitutes is far higher at between 59% and 80% depending on the location within Cambodia. See: http://prostitution.procon.org/sour...section-a-request-for-task-order-proposal.pdf

But moving away from the red herring of sex trafficking and prostitution, as a Naval veteran I can assure you that Western men marry foreign women and start families with them. In fact, I have family members that have done so with Filipinas. They are ALL still married these many years later with a single exception and she died of cancer.

It's an option that's on the table for us and that's why we discuss it.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,243
9,303
113
Excuse me, I have to leave now. I just booked a last-minute flight to the Philipines. I'll be back as soon as I find what I'm looking for there. Ciao for now. =^.^=
 
A

AgeofKnowledge

Guest
Scholarly studies like the 2000 paper published in American Law and Economics Review by Margaret F. Brinig and Douglas W. Allen report that women had initiate the divorce in around 70% of all cases in the U.S. and U.K..

Interestingly, the number one demographic of women initiating divorces against men was the middle-aged woman. So, I'm going to cry foul on your assertion because it contradicts the available scholarly data.


as a high percentage of the aging American men had noticed their "options", left their American wives, were now married to Filipino women, and now had an entirely new set of children going through the school system./QUOTE]
 
B

biscuit

Guest
[h=1]American Men Married to Filipina Women[/h]
By Alyana Cruz | Submitted On May 27, 2010
0


Testimonies of American men married to Filipina women are not essential. You can look around the corner and see happy American and Filipina couple. This simply proves that Filipino ladies can be excellent wives. Even the joke of Alec Baldwin when he appeared one time as guest of David Letterman, has one truth that wrapped around it. That is, the world knows that Filipina wives are splendid.
Why does a Filipino woman make a good wife? Her character has something to do with her culture. Her culture teaches her to value her family more than anything. She is taught by her mother her essence as a woman. She has seen it in the lives of her own mother and other women in the family who are married. A Filipina wife displays a selfless and unconditional love to her husband and children. She takes care each of them.
Caring may be is a virtue and a skill that each Filipino woman possesses. It is really pretty much easy for a Pinay to give care to her husband and children because Filipinos by nature are genial and gracious to people especially their guests.

Women in the Philippines treat their husbands like a royalty. Preparing his clothes, his breakfast, and attending to his other needs are not viewed as chores but it is an expression of her love. Service is a love language for her. She does things for her husband out of joy and love. She would never complain or nag about the things that she does for him and for their family. She is willing to give her career if needed just to give her full support that her husband needs. There is no wonder that she gets so much love and adoration in return. You will not be surprise if the American men married to filipina women will simply shower them all his loyalty, respect and love.

Here's A Secret Tip!
If you really want to marry a beautiful Filipina bride then go to http://www.filipinakisses.com right now, and meet lovely Filipina girls looking for someone like YOU!

Article Source: http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Alyana_Cruz







Did you find this article helpful?
2
1

[COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.470588)]Viewed 3,170 times

[COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.470588)]Word count: 317[/COLOR]


Article Tools
EzinePublisherReport this articleCite this article


Stay Informed
Subscribe to New Article Alerts:
Relationships: Singles Alyana Cruz

Subscribe
We will never sell or rent your email address.
Singles Article Feed




Find More Articles
Search




Recent Articles














[/COLOR]


[h=4]EzineArticles.com[/h]




[h=4]Authors[/h]




 
A

AgeofKnowledge

Guest
Lol @ biscuit!

Nobody I know used an agency. They went over there on a missionary trip, found themselves stationed there, etc... and met someone at their local church.

It was natural. That was funny though biscuit.
 
B

biscuit

Guest
Lol @ biscuit!

Nobody I know used an agency. They went over there on a missionary trip, found themselves stationed there, etc... and met someone at their local church.

It was natural. That was funny though biscuit.
"Hey, get them any way you can." :D
 
A

AgeofKnowledge

Guest
Of course, the Filipinas reading this are laughing at us now for even bringing this up... lol.

But men it's noteworthy that they can be tough gals. They don't like games and they abhor infidelity. I remember back in the early 80's in Zambales they had butterfly knives and knew how to use them. Guess what the joke was? Like I said, I'm a Naval veteran.

If you're going in for a landing; treat them AND their families right with both your words and your deeds. Peace.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,432
5,379
113
I think the generalization can be made... that there can be no generalization.

What you describe in Filipina wives is much different from what I've seen, since my most prominent memory is of the permanent physical scars on their children's bodies.

And that's the only reason I piped in on this discussion--because I think it's always important, and worth noting, that no matter how many surveys or how much research is done, people are people, and no race or country or culture is all rainbows and sunshine.

Every group casts a shadow somewhere.
 
Sep 6, 2013
4,430
117
63
men who travel abroad looking to marry a woman and start a family without the baggage of feminism and the high rate of divorce and punitive consequences that result from it in Western nations...
Translation: Men who marry foreign wives who are completely dependent on them - unable to survive on their own, which prohibits them from leaving even abusive husbands... unless of course their husband "sets them aside" which results in no financial burden for the husband to even provide for the wife he "annulled", leaving her again without means to protect or provide for herself. The only men I can think who would want a wife under these specific conditions are men who have control issues, or very low self-esteem.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,432
5,379
113
I know that Age mentioned something about Filipina wives ironing their husband's clothes and waiting on them hand and foot as an expression of love.

All I ask is that people would be smart enough to realize that not all foreign wives provide a dream life of service and worship--in my experience, yes, she made sure the clothes were ironed, as well as everything else--because she forged her American husband's name on his checks and had maids come to the house for everything, from household chores to manicures to bringing her clothes and doing her hair. She never worked because she saw bringing in the money as her husband's job--and her job was to spend it. She had landed "the prize"--a "wealthy" American man, and now was her time to sit back and pay to have everything done for her. Not all foreign women are going to adore you and treat you as their savior.

And not all American women are raging, "kill-all-the-men" feminists as portrayed in some of these posts.

I stopped over at my parent's house tonight and can you guess what my Mom was doing? Ironing my Dad's clothes. These are two simple, non-college-educated Christan people who are about as "plain vanilla" American white people as you can get.

They've been married nearly 50 years, treat each other with respect (my Mom always told me it was "a privilege to honor your husband") and have lived their whole lives right here in the US of A. My parents do not have the type of personalities where they automatically set themselves up as "experts" on anything and so that's why I'm naturally apprehensive about people who do. My Dad is a leader without accusing every woman of being a madhouse feminist or telling men how many options they have in choosing young, foreign bride/slaves.

I don't mind different viewpoints--I like learning about them. But to make all these crazy generalizations without recognizing that not everyone fits the supposed mold is why I speak up--because I hope the other young men and women out there reading these posts realize this as well.
 
Last edited:
B

biscuit

Guest
Translation: Men who marry foreign wives who are completely dependent on them - unable to survive on their own, which prohibits them from leaving even abusive husbands... unless of course their husband "sets them aside" which results in no financial burden for the husband to even provide for the wife he "annulled", leaving her again without means to protect or provide for herself. The only men I can think who would want a wife under these specific conditions are men who have control issues, or very low self-esteem.
Absolutely hilarious!!! Don't blame these men looking for better women or wives. Better yet, blame the feminists for millions of young, eligible American women who can't find husbands & mates. The feminist agenda has badly backfired because it strength lies in the ability to control, dominate, manipulate and threatened men into their submission. Without these men to fulfill this agenda, the feminists' quest to survive is greatly reduced.

God works in "mysterious ways." Feminists declared war on His institution of marriage without tens of millions of women jumping unto the bandwagon ... and now they are paying a terrible price.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,432
5,379
113
Absolutely hilarious!!! Don't blame these men looking for better women or wives. Better yet, blame the feminists for millions of young, eligible American women who can't find husbands & mates. The feminist agenda has badly backfired because it strength lies in the ability to control, dominate, manipulate and threatened men into their submission. Without these men to fulfill this agenda, the feminists' quest to survive is greatly reduced.
Biscuit,

If all the men have so many options... I am curious... Where should the honest, hard-working Christian women look when they want to find other honest, hard-working Christian men as husbands who aren't embittered and glued to the past of what other women have done to them or others around them?

Obviously, we won't find them in this thread.

Your answer is that we always must be jealous of something or blaming someone for something. I remember you wrote a post once telling me not to blame you for my terrible life. But I don't have a terrible life, let alone something I would somehow blame on someone like you. What if we're not the jealous, bitter trolls you accuse us of being? What if many of us are honest, God-fearing women who just want to find a nice guy?

We women in this forum listen to you and Age constantly tell us about how horrible American women are and how we destroy families, ruin men, and corrupt the family unit.

So... I would also like to know... Where can we find good men who aren't bitter, accusing, and judgmental, as all these posts come across?

Do you have a certain country in mind?

I'm an independent woman.

I can pay for my own ticket.
 
Last edited:
B

biscuit

Guest
without tens of millions of women jumping unto the bandwagon
edit: with tens of millions ....
 
B

biscuit

Guest
Biscuit,

If all the men have so many options... I am curious... Where should the honest, hard-working Christian women look when they want to find other honest, hard-working Christian men as husbands who aren't embittered and glued to the past of what other women have done to them or others around them?

Obviously, we won't find them in this thread.

Your answer is that we always must be jealous of something or blaming someone for something. I remember you wrote a post once telling me not to blame you for my terrible life. But I don't have a terrible life, let alone something I would somehow blame on someone like you. What if we're not the jealous, bitter trolls you accuse us of being? What if many of us are honest, God-fearing women who just want to find a nice guy?

We women in this forum listen to you and Age constantly tell us about how horrible American women are and how we destroy families, ruin men, and corrupt the family unit.

So... I would also like to know... Where can we find good men who aren't bitter, accusing, and judgmental, as all these posts come across?

Do you have a certain country in mind?

I'm an independent woman.

I can pay for my own ticket.
To tell you the truth it will be up to the Christian woman to prove her worthiness to her future husband that she isn't a feminist and doesn't support the agenda at all and the marriage would be for life.

After nearly 50 years of the so-called "feminist rule," it is an uphill climb because the trust isn't there for most men. I would trust a foreign woman any day before I would an American woman and I am sure I am not alone.
 
Last edited by a moderator: