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I'm sorry you feel so discouraged, mykim. Rest assured that there are some Christian ladies out there who don't think that men always need to make the first move. There are some Christian ladies out there who are perfectly comfortable pursuing a man. I'm not one of them, but I know several ladies like this, and I know they're not that small of a minority, especially in modern western cultures. Chin up, friend. 
There are successful marriages out there that started with the woman making the first move.
Can I just say, though, that the "silly rules" actually provided a lot of simplicity and structure back when they were strictly followed? Men and women didn't have to wonder about what steps to take. The various rules about how to pursue and enter a relationship were so well understood and expected by everyone that it eliminated a lot of the confusion. I'm obviously not speaking from my own experience, here, but I have a lot of Christian friends who are extremely elderly and can remember what they journey to marriage looked like for most people several generations ago. The more we started to get rid of the "silly rules", the more you started to see things like relationship advice columns in magazines, relationship advice websites, etc.
Just something to think about, but as I said at the beginning, don't worry. If you're looking for a woman who doesn't necessarily expect you to make the first move, then trust me.. they exist.
There are successful marriages out there that started with the woman making the first move. Can I just say, though, that the "silly rules" actually provided a lot of simplicity and structure back when they were strictly followed? Men and women didn't have to wonder about what steps to take. The various rules about how to pursue and enter a relationship were so well understood and expected by everyone that it eliminated a lot of the confusion. I'm obviously not speaking from my own experience, here, but I have a lot of Christian friends who are extremely elderly and can remember what they journey to marriage looked like for most people several generations ago. The more we started to get rid of the "silly rules", the more you started to see things like relationship advice columns in magazines, relationship advice websites, etc.
Just something to think about, but as I said at the beginning, don't worry. If you're looking for a woman who doesn't necessarily expect you to make the first move, then trust me.. they exist.
F
I'm sorry you feel so discouraged, mykim. Rest assured that there are some Christian ladies out there who don't think that men always need to make the first move. There are some Christian ladies out there who are perfectly comfortable pursuing a man. I'm not one of them, but I know several ladies like this, and I know they're not that small of a minority, especially in modern western cultures. Chin up, friend. There are successful marriages out there that started with the woman making the first move.
Can I just say, though, that the "silly rules" actually provided a lot of simplicity and structure back when they were strictly followed? Men and women didn't have to wonder about what steps to take. The various rules about how to pursue and enter a relationship were so well understood and expected by everyone that it eliminated a lot of the confusion. I'm obviously not speaking from my own experience, here, but I have a lot of Christian friends who are extremely elderly and can remember what they journey to marriage looked like for most people several generations ago. The more we started to get rid of the "silly rules", the more you started to see things like relationship advice columns in magazines, relationship advice websites, etc.
Just something to think about, but as I said at the beginning, don't worry. If you're looking for a woman who doesn't necessarily expect you to make the first move, then trust me.. they exist.
There are successful marriages out there that started with the woman making the first move. Can I just say, though, that the "silly rules" actually provided a lot of simplicity and structure back when they were strictly followed? Men and women didn't have to wonder about what steps to take. The various rules about how to pursue and enter a relationship were so well understood and expected by everyone that it eliminated a lot of the confusion. I'm obviously not speaking from my own experience, here, but I have a lot of Christian friends who are extremely elderly and can remember what they journey to marriage looked like for most people several generations ago. The more we started to get rid of the "silly rules", the more you started to see things like relationship advice columns in magazines, relationship advice websites, etc.
Just something to think about, but as I said at the beginning, don't worry. If you're looking for a woman who doesn't necessarily expect you to make the first move, then trust me.. they exist.
-> ethnocentrism - Wiktionary
ethnocentrism (uncountable) : Noun
The tendency to look at the world primarily from the perspective of one's own culture.
1 Cor 14:18 I thank my God, I speak with tongues more than ye all:
ethnocentrism (uncountable) : Noun
The tendency to look at the world primarily from the perspective of one's own culture.
1 Cor 14:18 I thank my God, I speak with tongues more than ye all:
A
LOL True!
FireWire, I feel so bad that this has escalated to the point that it has. There must be, though, a good Christian woman out there, my brother. I fear, because many are much like Misty! Oh God, be merciful!
A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself.
It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.
The contentions of a wife are a continual dropping.
But, I'm still convinced that there must be a remnant, even one as Abigail, of whom the Bible says that she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance. There must be, brother! There must be!
FireWire, I feel so bad that this has escalated to the point that it has. There must be, though, a good Christian woman out there, my brother. I fear, because many are much like Misty! Oh God, be merciful!
A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself.
It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.
The contentions of a wife are a continual dropping.
But, I'm still convinced that there must be a remnant, even one as Abigail, of whom the Bible says that she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance. There must be, brother! There must be!
A
Art, my brother, I have always been gentle with you, but as your sister in Christ I believe I need to speak up. Please know that I say this in love, and not in condemnation.
It does not matter if buckets agrees with you. It does not matter if you think she is wrong. She is your SISTER IN CHRIST. She is created in the image of God, she has CHRIST dwelling in her heart, and she is a daughter of the most high God.
If you had participated in more of our candid threads (as I have encouraged) and taken the time to get to know her, you would see her sweet spirit and profound love for Christ!
It is perfectly acceptable to disagree and even correct/rebuke one another. That is part of how we learn and grow! But we ought to do so with a spirit of love and gentleness, ESPECIALLY if the brother or sister whom we are correcting is significantly younger.
It is true that Jesus himself sometimes used harsh words when he was rebuking others, but He only did that when facing those with truly prideful or wicked hearts. To everyone else, he spoke firmly and with conviction, but also with LOVE.
Men of God are charged to treat younger Christian women as they would treat their own sisters: with all purity. (1 Timothy 5:2) Would you call your sister a "Deceitful, fractious girl"? I pray that you would not.
Also, since I know you have a great desire to meet and marry a lovely woman of God (a wonderful goal, I might add!), I would encourage you to evaluate the manner in which you speak to young girls. A woman of God may witness your harshness and wonder if you would do the same thing to your future daughters, or even to your future wife. As a woman myself, my heart was in agony when I read your response to Buckets. Just because someone disagrees with you does not give you the right to stop expressing kindness to them.
Even though I am extremely offended by the way you have treated our sister Buckets, and even though I vehemently disagree with some of your views and beliefs, I refuse to call you names or "yell" at you about it, because you are my brother. I know you will probably get angry with me for posting this, and others on the forum will probably be annoyed that I posted instead of simply ignoring the quarrel here.. but I prayed about it before posting and I still felt led to say something.
to Buckets: thank you for being a living, breathing example of 1 Timothy 4:12. I love you!
It does not matter if buckets agrees with you. It does not matter if you think she is wrong. She is your SISTER IN CHRIST. She is created in the image of God, she has CHRIST dwelling in her heart, and she is a daughter of the most high God.
If you had participated in more of our candid threads (as I have encouraged) and taken the time to get to know her, you would see her sweet spirit and profound love for Christ!
It is perfectly acceptable to disagree and even correct/rebuke one another. That is part of how we learn and grow!
But we ought to do so with a spirit of love and gentleness, ESPECIALLY if the brother or sister whom we are correcting is significantly younger. It is true that Jesus himself sometimes used harsh words when he was rebuking others, but He only did that when facing those with truly prideful or wicked hearts. To everyone else, he spoke firmly and with conviction, but also with LOVE.
Men of God are charged to treat younger Christian women as they would treat their own sisters: with all purity. (1 Timothy 5:2) Would you call your sister a "Deceitful, fractious girl"? I pray that you would not.
Also, since I know you have a great desire to meet and marry a lovely woman of God (a wonderful goal, I might add!), I would encourage you to evaluate the manner in which you speak to young girls. A woman of God may witness your harshness and wonder if you would do the same thing to your future daughters, or even to your future wife. As a woman myself, my heart was in agony when I read your response to Buckets.
Just because someone disagrees with you does not give you the right to stop expressing kindness to them. Even though I am extremely offended by the way you have treated our sister Buckets, and even though I vehemently disagree with some of your views and beliefs, I refuse to call you names or "yell" at you about it, because you are my brother. I know you will probably get angry with me for posting this, and others on the forum will probably be annoyed that I posted instead of simply ignoring the quarrel here.. but I prayed about it before posting and I still felt led to say something.
to Buckets: thank you for being a living, breathing example of 1 Timothy 4:12.
I love you!
But I will speak to you.
Again, I was not harsh in anything I said, nor was my language abusive. I remained respectful and as tact as I could be. Others, however, were not so kind, and for you to come to their defense is very upsetting.
Men of God are charged to treat younger Christian women as they would treat their own sisters: with all purity. (1 Timothy 5:2) Would you call your sister a "Deceitful, fractious girl"? I pray that you would not.
A loving father is one that knows the importance of discipline; although you have taken it upon yourself to consider what I said as harsh, I wasn't; and as others have clearly been harsh to me on these forums, of which I know that you well know what they've said, then I admit that I'm becoming suspicious of you. I never saw you standing up to those that have done so, but you seem to feel that I'm always the offender, the one in the wrong. Well, I will not be your piñata.
As a woman myself, my heart was in agony when I read your response to Buckets. Just because someone disagrees with you does not give you the right to stop expressing kindness to them.
Just because someone disagrees with you does not give you the right to stop expressing kindness to them.
Extremely offended? I am not responsible for such feelings, but to read that you were extremely offended is rather shocking. Vehemently disagree with some of my views? Can I hold such awful, unBiblical views that would bring about such a reaction from you? Please, let me know what these views & beliefs of mine are!
But I hope that this is not some hidden accusation, for I have done nothing of the sort. And I'm thankful that you won't do such a thing, as others (of whom you communicate quite well) have done so, to a very maligning extent.
U
I put him on ignore a while ago. I saw the troll behavior pretty quick. Quick to make attacks, yet always is the victim, never the aggressor. Always creating threads to stir up trouble, or revive dead ones with the same intent. Always making inflammatory posts with some blatantly ignorant statement. His trolling may be more subtle than most that come on here, but it is still trolling nonetheless.
F
That poster is rather annoying. Like praus she posts stuff that is out of context. She is certainly not an example of a good Christian woman. I understand she was abused by her ex husband but it's not really an excuse to belittle men. I could very well do the same thing based on how I've been treated. She clearly has a lot of anger towards men in general. Of course her sisters will back her up. Gender war? Yup certainly is.
D
That's funny how your description of " dating " is a clear depiction of idolatry, and the woman is the idol.
Why should Christians conform to the outdated ways of the ancient world and fall into idolatry of women ?
Courting is perfectly clear and infinitely much better than " dating " !
" dating " is extremely confusing and all about how to be the best woman worshiper possible,
which is disgusting to the highest degree !
Please don't waste your time with those stupid and vain head games ! A woman is just a woman, and only God is God !
God has something infinitely much better for y'all : Christian courting !
Why should Christians conform to the outdated ways of the ancient world and fall into idolatry of women ?
Courting is perfectly clear and infinitely much better than " dating " !
" dating " is extremely confusing and all about how to be the best woman worshiper possible,
which is disgusting to the highest degree !
Please don't waste your time with those stupid and vain head games ! A woman is just a woman, and only God is God !
God has something infinitely much better for y'all : Christian courting !
S
You ... didn't really respond reasonably at all. sigh ... Young buckets, allow me to make it very simple for you: answering a No with a Yes Yes is not logical; you've dismissed alot of what I told you as false and simply restated yourself; even after I corrected your false view of my own words, you stubbornly disregarded anything I said; and since this is the case, my view of you now is not of a wise young Christian, but of a deceitful, fractious girl. It seems that you took no time to even consider what I said, and so I will not continue.
Pray for wisdom, and God will surely give it liberally! Let's not be insulting and surmising with illogicalness, okay?
Pray for wisdom, and God will surely give it liberally! Let's not be insulting and surmising with illogicalness, okay?
Capiche?
Luke 17:2
It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
D
Brother Servant, sure Brother Art should never have called our sister Buckets "a deceitful, fractious girl",
and many other things;
this was a great wrong he did to her.
But the quote you mentioned was not about sins who can be forgiven, it was about unforgivable sins.
Are you saying that if Art repent he should never be forgiven ?
The quote Jesus told here was about extremely evil hypocrite pharisees, and I'm totally sure Art is not one of them !
As Jesus called them demons ! Is Art a demon who would deserve to have a millstone hanged about his neck and be cast into the sea ! Absolutely not !
I totally condemn what he said to Buckets, but Art is a human like you and me,
and he has nothing to do with the extremely evil hypocrite pharisees Jesus was talking about
in that quote you mentioned !
I feel greatly sorry this thread has entered into such fleshly and hurtful argument,
whereas we should demonstrate the Christian love brothers and sisters in Christ should have for each other.
Peace
and many other things;
this was a great wrong he did to her.
But the quote you mentioned was not about sins who can be forgiven, it was about unforgivable sins.
Are you saying that if Art repent he should never be forgiven ?
The quote Jesus told here was about extremely evil hypocrite pharisees, and I'm totally sure Art is not one of them !
As Jesus called them demons ! Is Art a demon who would deserve to have a millstone hanged about his neck and be cast into the sea ! Absolutely not !
I totally condemn what he said to Buckets, but Art is a human like you and me,
and he has nothing to do with the extremely evil hypocrite pharisees Jesus was talking about
in that quote you mentioned !
I feel greatly sorry this thread has entered into such fleshly and hurtful argument,
whereas we should demonstrate the Christian love brothers and sisters in Christ should have for each other.
Peace
D
Wow ! Do you think God think the same thing about Art ? Did you never do any mistake in your life ? Yes ?
Jesus gave you a second chance, and you wouldn't do the same
with your Brother Art by giving him a possibility to repent ?
You already labelled him as an eternal " troll " ? Is this the way of the ancient world, or the way of heaven ?
I think you know the answer already ,
and I really really hope you would make an infinitely much better choice than to eternally label your brother Art a " troll ",
for the sake of Christ.
Peace.
Jesus gave you a second chance, and you wouldn't do the same
with your Brother Art by giving him a possibility to repent ?
You already labelled him as an eternal " troll " ? Is this the way of the ancient world, or the way of heaven ?
I think you know the answer already ,
and I really really hope you would make an infinitely much better choice than to eternally label your brother Art a " troll ",
for the sake of Christ.
Peace.