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I met my wife. I was seeking the will of God. There's a very long amazing story how God obviously set us together, but her and I only needed to talk about personal things and see each other lives a bit and be sure it was the will of God for us to marry. Dating wasn't needed.
I give you my honest word, we don't have anywhere near a perfect marriage, but compared to every marriage I have ever seen and even how other spouses treat each other at their max, we have the best marriage I have ever seen that I didn't even think anyone would ever have because of seeing how all other marriages go on. Do you people not realize SO MANY dates are full of lies and fake love?
for example, I have been telling young women most guys cheat, want sex, etc. Not that I assume that, but because everywhere I go that is what they tell me and brag about it. They tell me all their plans about how to make a girl like you so she will have sex with you and other things.
It's not always the sex either. It can be other things. Many guys use women like a tool.
I knew this guy my old friend was with, and I told her his plans as he was always buying her things, seeing her every single day of the year after work, he is great at bribing people, getting even great financial deals because he knows how to smart talk to get what he wants, and he told me that he doesn't even like who she is, but he will marry her and just let her live with him until she matures. I told her, all his sweet talk, buying gifts and such will all come to an end, and when you become his wife, he is just going to tell you to clean up, have sex with him and he is going to work all day and play video games and leave you with the children. She didn't believe me. A year later, all I said became a reality. Till this day it continues and all she ever talks about night and day is how depressed she is because he isn't the man she thought he was.
This same stuff happened to countless other women I know. Luckily, some of them met a good guy, most of them ended up with cheating husbands, drug addicts, porn addicts, ones who pay them completely no attention, who wont keep the vows they made to do things with their life, instead their marriage has come out to be calling them the B word, and heifer's, and then their husbands even tell me they don't like their wives.
I looked at my dating life, I always ended up being cheated on.
I realized I can love a woman and show her I do without dating.
if I don't date, she just cant say that I am hers and she is mine.
That way, we wont break up and we cannot be cheated on to be left heartbroken.
Just like we talk dating, I can do that not being a boyfriend. Same with playing games, sharing feelings, hugging, calling, texting, movies, eating together, writing a poem, etc.
I realized there is no difference with dating except that you are just imagining you own someone.
Do I have to date to know my brother? My sister? Dog? Mother or father?
Can I not tell what they want, what they like to do, how they feel, what they believe, or if we could live together nicely? No. Come on people.
Dating isn't what gets you close to someone or shows you who they really are. In fact, more often when you ask someone to date you, especially very young people, they get so excited inside and start dreaming of these fantasy feeling inside themselves that they want to imagine is real, they start telling you before they even know you that they love you in such a short time, but down the road they could start to say why the hate you and don't like you. Growing up, I was very careful after being cheated on who I would believe loved me. Not a single gf loved me. Looking back at everything they said was a lie about how they felt about me.
But even not dating keeps your friends as friends. See, more often when you date someone, then you realize you don't want to be with them, good or bad reason, then you never stay friends usually. You may end up hating or highly disliking each other forever. Even so, what if they were still your friend, your next lover is going to likely want you forever away from your ex friend. So even if you broke up in peace, your wife/husband likely wont want you ever talking to your friend just because many years ago you dated for half a second. heh.
Why I think dating is bad:
1. you can be cheated on
2. you're likely being lied to about love and feelings
3. someone is likely using you
4. you will lose them as your friend
5. your spouse in future wont want you with them
6. its only an imagination, it doesn't really create anything or change anything
7. anything you do dating to get to know someone, you can do without dating. I did.