Fizzies Theory of Heliocentric Mental Projection -
a Defense of the Flat Earth:
Ya know, I'm not that well studied in physics, but the word "physics" does sound like the word "fizzies", and I think that's a prophetic sign for the end times, clearly showing the realm of science has been taken over by bloated academicians with too little time for a proper meal who just need a good burp to relieve themselves of their crazy theories about big round moving planets which are, in reality, nothing more than a mental projection of their own indigestion.
So, there you have it.
My model of the solar system posits the Copernican Theory is nothing more than a man's mental projection of his own indigestion, and that is derived from my profound and lifelong study of "fizzies", relying predominantly on the "burping scientist" method of analysis.
You can find my work peer reviewed in the American Journal of Indigestion, Psychiatric Anomalies, Astrophysics, and Pies.