Hey Everyone,
I admit to doing a lot of thinking today. All of us get frustrated, and for the times we women get frustrated with you gentlemen, I wholeheartedly apologize.
But the thing I've noticed lately is the intense stream of threads that basically tell us women everything that's wrong with us: how we need to submit, how we're too materialistic, and how we expect to be put on pedestals and worshiped like queens. I understand that men get frustrated, I really do, and I really am sorry for that.
But I have to wonder to myself: Guys, from reading the posts here at CC, would you say that most of the women here are what's being described? Cold, heartless, blood-sucking monsters who think only of themselves and their own material gain? Insubordinate, rebellious hellions who would never agree to submit themselves to a God-given husband? Would you say this is true of even half the women who post here on CC?
I understand that men need to vent. I've had great Christian guy friends who have struggled with a lot things regarding women--one used to call me every week and vent for hours. "Kim," he would say, "There are only two kinds of women: those who want money, and those with serious emotional problems." He had been through a lot, and I admit, sometimes it was hard to listen to. But the difference was, he never treated me personally as if I were one of the women who had hurt him. He always went out of his way to tell me thank you for being his friend and for offering a different point of view, and that's what kept me going. (He even later met a great Christian girl and is now happily married... and I'm grateful that he told me thank you for being there for him while he was struggling through a lot of negative emotions.) But I admit... it drained the life out of me at the same time. But I asked God what to do, and felt that my role was to try to help... and to serve... by listening.
Now, here's where I have to ask God's help in taking the plank out of my own eye. Many times in the threads, I have complained about my own personal experience of running into Christian men who are addicted to pornography. But, I've tried to never write a thread that said, "Why Do Men Say They're Christians When They're Addicted to Porn?" The reason I try to avoid this is because 1. I know not every guy is like that and, 2. The men here who are brave enough to talk about it are also very open about seeking God's help to change.
Guys, I do know you're frustrated with the way some women act, and we women are just as fed up as you.
But I ask again, and very honestly--do the women here, from what you've read in the posts we take so much time and heart to write, really sound like the same types of women who have hurt you so much? If not, please, please, consider that we are all trying our best and please don't lump us all into the same category. Yes, we are women, but in most cases, we are not the women who wronged you. Please listen to what we have to say and, maybe when you do need to vent (as we all do from time to time), perhaps it could be worded in such a way as, "Ladies, I'm really, really fed up with being treated like a wallet from time to time. I've read some posts from many CC women who have different hearts and I'd like to ask your advice as to how to avoid these types of women?"
I am not trying to sound self-righteous, nor am I trying to say women are perfect. But what I AM saying is that when I read posts from people here, I see a very honest, very sincere, very heartfelt group of people who care about others and are devoting their lives to serve God and allow Him to help them become better people.
All I ask is that could we please recognize that many of the people here, both men and women, are trying their best and allowing God to work with them? May I please respectfully ask that we recognize them as individuals and not one of the masses who mistreated you or broke your heart?
Again, I apologize to the gentlemen here if you've ever felt I have "lumped you altogether" in any of my posts. We have AWESOME guys here and the ladies of CC appreciate each one of you.
We just hope that maybe, just maybe, you might also feel the same way about some of us.
I admit to doing a lot of thinking today. All of us get frustrated, and for the times we women get frustrated with you gentlemen, I wholeheartedly apologize.
But the thing I've noticed lately is the intense stream of threads that basically tell us women everything that's wrong with us: how we need to submit, how we're too materialistic, and how we expect to be put on pedestals and worshiped like queens. I understand that men get frustrated, I really do, and I really am sorry for that.
But I have to wonder to myself: Guys, from reading the posts here at CC, would you say that most of the women here are what's being described? Cold, heartless, blood-sucking monsters who think only of themselves and their own material gain? Insubordinate, rebellious hellions who would never agree to submit themselves to a God-given husband? Would you say this is true of even half the women who post here on CC?
I understand that men need to vent. I've had great Christian guy friends who have struggled with a lot things regarding women--one used to call me every week and vent for hours. "Kim," he would say, "There are only two kinds of women: those who want money, and those with serious emotional problems." He had been through a lot, and I admit, sometimes it was hard to listen to. But the difference was, he never treated me personally as if I were one of the women who had hurt him. He always went out of his way to tell me thank you for being his friend and for offering a different point of view, and that's what kept me going. (He even later met a great Christian girl and is now happily married... and I'm grateful that he told me thank you for being there for him while he was struggling through a lot of negative emotions.) But I admit... it drained the life out of me at the same time. But I asked God what to do, and felt that my role was to try to help... and to serve... by listening.
Now, here's where I have to ask God's help in taking the plank out of my own eye. Many times in the threads, I have complained about my own personal experience of running into Christian men who are addicted to pornography. But, I've tried to never write a thread that said, "Why Do Men Say They're Christians When They're Addicted to Porn?" The reason I try to avoid this is because 1. I know not every guy is like that and, 2. The men here who are brave enough to talk about it are also very open about seeking God's help to change.
Guys, I do know you're frustrated with the way some women act, and we women are just as fed up as you.
But I ask again, and very honestly--do the women here, from what you've read in the posts we take so much time and heart to write, really sound like the same types of women who have hurt you so much? If not, please, please, consider that we are all trying our best and please don't lump us all into the same category. Yes, we are women, but in most cases, we are not the women who wronged you. Please listen to what we have to say and, maybe when you do need to vent (as we all do from time to time), perhaps it could be worded in such a way as, "Ladies, I'm really, really fed up with being treated like a wallet from time to time. I've read some posts from many CC women who have different hearts and I'd like to ask your advice as to how to avoid these types of women?"
I am not trying to sound self-righteous, nor am I trying to say women are perfect. But what I AM saying is that when I read posts from people here, I see a very honest, very sincere, very heartfelt group of people who care about others and are devoting their lives to serve God and allow Him to help them become better people.
All I ask is that could we please recognize that many of the people here, both men and women, are trying their best and allowing God to work with them? May I please respectfully ask that we recognize them as individuals and not one of the masses who mistreated you or broke your heart?
Again, I apologize to the gentlemen here if you've ever felt I have "lumped you altogether" in any of my posts. We have AWESOME guys here and the ladies of CC appreciate each one of you.
We just hope that maybe, just maybe, you might also feel the same way about some of us.
Especially if she looked like this one.
