Modesty is the only virtue that will stop your husband from cheating on you.

[Angela53510]

The OP is without a doubt the most "unusual" post I have read in a LONG, long, long, long time.

Someone completely misguided and focusing on things that have literally nothing to do with a successful marriage.

I've been married for over 35 years, and my husband has never cheated on me, nor I on him. I have worn (SHOCK!!) earrings the entire time. My ears are pierced, and I like to keep the holes from healing over so they are in 24/7. In fact, for my 60th birthday, my husband bought me a pair of white gold earrings that are possiblly my favourite earrings ever!

He has also bought me a gold/diamond bracelet and gold necklaces and other beautiful things. He loves to see me look beautiful.

I am not a big makeup wearer, just a touch on Sunday for church. But always sun screen for my lips! I hope that doesn't count, since I seem to be failing the modesty test. I do agree that some women wear too much makeup. I was in Denny's last week, and there was a woman with eye lashes past her nose, and you couldn't see a single piece of her face, for all the makeup. She truly looked like a hooker, although the people she was with did not seem like people who would hang out with that sort of person. She was just misguided as to what looks nice, IMO.

I do not wear immodest clothes, but that is my preference, even before I was a Christian and I played in bars. In fact, I look back at our promo pictures for the band, and I dressed more conservatively then than now. Like being covered from the top of my neck to the bottom of my toes. I still love long skirts, but since the are impractical, I have opted for below the knee skirts.

So, my husband adorns me with jewellry, and he has never cheated. He is a wonderful man, who loves God, and me. And his whole family, including our children, grandchildren and his birth family.

Basically, anyone who is moral and decent will not cheat on their wives. My father did not become a Christian till he was 82, and he never cheated on my mother and was madly in love with her till the day he died.

OK, I'm ranting. This is the stupidest, most ill informed post I have ever read. And not even a single Bible verse to back him up. (I know this is not the BDF, but seriously, if you are going to come in, with guns blazing, an unmarried man making definitive statements about marriage and modesty, he better have some firm evidence behind him!)

 

[Mo0448]

View attachment 129926

please...think of the kittens.

where are these trolls at...less cats sounds great!

 

[proverbs35]

Angela:

Thank you for thanking the time to reply to this thread in the single's forum. I know that you rarely reply to any threads here because you are married and not single. However, singles really need to hear from Christians with long-standing and healthy marriages. It reminds us that marriage is actually doable, and it gives many of us that glimmer of hope.

OK, I'm ranting. This is the stupidest, most ill informed post I have ever read. And not even a single Bible verse to back him up. (I know this is not the BDF, but seriously, if you are going to come in, with guns blazing, an unmarried man making definitive statements about marriage and modesty, he better have some firm evidence behind him!)

Unfortunately, it's really not all that unusual for this sub-section (singles) of CC. We recently had a thread here that was so opinionated (not Biblically supported) and offensive to women (and men) that the mods here didn't just close that thread, but they deleted it altogether.

The good thing is that many of the singles here (male and female alike) are very savvy, so they quickly recognize that these threads don't line up with the Bible.

I want to echo a comment that Violetreigns posted:

There are so many godly men on this site who reflect Jesus’ position toward women. We women know who they are and we praise God for them! The words they post don’t cause women to recoil in their spirits, but to blossom and grow in spiritual strength. These brothers treat us women with dignity and love, lifting us up above worldly judgments. They consider their sisters and protect us from carnal statements such as yours.

I couldn't have said it any better. Many of the brothers in the singles forum have consistently made a stand against OPs like this one and defended their Christian sisters and what the Bible actually teaches. Like Violetreigns, I also recognize who those brothers are and I appreciate their words very much. We need more brothers like them in the Christian community.

Angela please don't be a stranger in the singles forum. There are a few married people who post here on a regular basis because they have some valuable insight to share. Angela - you have a lot of life experience, marriage experience and resulting wisdom, and sometimes we singles need to glean from that. Thanks again.

 

[Fenner]

By modesty i mean not being worldly and unnecessarily flamboyant. Modesty also means modest dressing which means no earrings, no coloured make up,no lipsticks, no short dresses etc. Once you start giving your husband immodesty then you are no longer special in the eyes of husband. Why is this? This is because your husband if he wished could have not married you, instead he could have had 4 different women on his bed every night, but he gave that up for you because he wants a Christian marriage with a modest christian woman. But what do you do? Instead of giving him modesty, you pile on the earrings and make up so that you can look "attractive". Now let me ask you, which is more attractive to a man, one immodest christian woman with earrings and lipsticks every night or 4 immodest women with earrings and lipsticks every night? Of course it is the 4 immodest women, the only way you can beat those 4 women is by being a modest and conservative christian woman. Why should i commit myself to one immodest christian woman when i can 4 immodest women on my bed every night? But if i find that modest and conservative Christian woman then i will not approach those 4 women because i know i am marrying a modest woman who is as pure as eve on the day she was created to join Adam. The point here is that you cannot be lukewarm. You can either be a pagan woman and pile on the earrings or be a strict, modest and conservative christian. Once you are in the middle then you are no longer special.

But why are christian women immodest? I believe that the majority are just ignorant, they know deep down that it is wrong to be immodest but they are probably deceived by false pastors. For example these christian women see pastors wives and female preachers like Joyce Meyer wearing lipsticks and earrings and they are like "after all Joyce Meyer wears earrings, earrings cant be wrong". You stupid fool on your way to hell! Who told you that the female preacher you see on TV wearing earrings is a true christian, she could be a devil worshiper who pretends to be a Christian and who is only wearing those earrings so that you will copy her and join her in hell. Another reason christian women are immodest is because of the majority factor, they say to themselves "after all every one does it, it cant be wrong". You stupid fool on your way to hell! if you see everyone jumping to their deaths from a cliff will you also join in and say "after all everyone is doing it, i will jump as well"? You should note that many are called but few are chosen and there are enough pits in hell to accommodate everyone of you.

So what is the argument used by deceivers to justify immodest dressing? Here it is , they claim that immodesty like earrings don't make a woman immodest as long as she is not wearing it to attract attention to herself. You stupid fool on your way to hell! don't you know that some things are clearly wrong irrespective of whether it attracts attention or not? It is not only the attraction of attention that is wrong, it is the fact that you pierced your ears just so that you can wear earrings. You pierced the temple of the holy spirit just so that you can wear earrings.

As for me, earrings and lipsticks are an exclusion criteria, when it comes to asking a woman out, i don't and will not ask a woman with lipsticks or earrings out. This is because i don't want to commit adultery after marrying an immodest woman. I will rather marry the modest woman knowing that i am marrying pure eve just like Adam was with eve.You may say to your self "after all some christian men don't mind earrings, my former christian boyfriend was ok with earrings" but note that men are of varying qualities, may be the man that tolerates earrings is the man that will cheat on you whilst you are pregnant with his child and abandon you with the children after marriage. May be the man that does not want earrings is the one that will love and care for you from the day of your marriage till the end, so make your choices wisely.

I am trying to figure out networks and christian denominations where modest and conservative Christians gather and it will be great if anyone here makes a recommendation. i know of some denominations but i will like to now more so i will welcome recommendations.

Ok I think you're trolling. Just in case you're serious I'll respond,


I've been married 16 years. On my wedding day I wore earrings and some makeup, I never wear a lot of makeup or jewelry because I don't feel like it.

If you could have 4 women in your bed every night and you'd even think of che
ating on your wife for any reason your the one who should check his morality.

This is just a warped and strange thread.

 

[secularhermit]

Just think: 4 girls in the bed?

That´s an orgy and, surely it´s not love, but sex. However, I can recall the Lord on His talk to that Samaritan woman who had 5 men she was married to no one. (Jn 4:16)

On the other side, what he said (in few lines) reminded me those books I read from Desmond Morris and, Morris was not totally wrong, by the way.

 

[Lynx]

Pretty impressive trolling I'd say. One post and he got six pages of people yelling at him.

 

[Oncefallen]

Ok I think you're trolling. Just in case you're serious I'll respond,

Good to see you back Fenner.

In your absence Godson has decided that every once in a while we need to have an over the top thread. Unfortunately I really do think that he's serious in his very misguided legalistic worldview.

 

[Tintin]

And Yet, I really don't see why some people aren't banned outright, this OP and the tithing guy for one.

 

[ServantStrike]

Good to see you back Fenner.

In your absence Godson has decided that every once in a while we need to have an over the top thread. Unfortunately I really do think that he's serious in his very misguided legalistic worldview.

Yes, I'm pretty sure he's serious. I started praying for the guy because he certainly needs it.

I really do pity the woman who ends up with him. Unless he straightens up, he's going to be a tyrant in a marriage situation.

He's not even got scripture to back up his claims. That should be a clue to him, but I don't believe it is for some reason.

 

[Roh_Chris]

I actually pity the guy and I just said a quick prayer for him. His views do not surprise me because my church also teaches that women must not wear jewellery or makeup.

I only hope that God opens his eyes before he ends up traumatising his woman with such blindly authoritarian views.

 

[seoulsearch]

I actually pity the guy and I just said a quick prayer for him. His views do not surprise me because my church also teaches that women must not wear jewellery or makeup.

I only hope that God opens his eyes before he ends up traumatising his woman with such blindly authoritarian views.

This is interesting, Roh.

Your church teaches that women must not do these things, but you seem to believe otherwise? I'm just curious as to how you came to that conclusion yourself? (Because so many people just go with whatever their church teaches to the letter--I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it's usually because they don't know/study the Bible on their own.)

 

[Fenner]

Good to see you back Fenner.

In your absence Godson has decided that every once in a while we need to have an over the top thread. Unfortunately I really do think that he's serious in his very misguided legalistic worldview.

Thanks Once fallen!

 

[Roh_Chris]

This is interesting, Roh.

Your church teaches that women must not do these things, but you seem to believe otherwise? I'm just curious as to how you came to that conclusion yourself? (Because so many people just go with whatever their church teaches to the letter--I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it's usually because they don't know/study the Bible on their own.)

Hang on, Kim. I never implied in my post that I believe otherwise.

But seriously ... You're right. I believe otherwise. What brought me to that conclusion? Well, let's see...

1. One verse that is often used by those who teach that women must not wear jewellery or makeup is I Peter 3:3. But if one paid attention to what message Peter intended to convey in that verse, he/she will realize that Peter wants us not to pay excessive attention to external beauty. How did I understand that? Firstly, by reading the preceding and succeeding verses; and secondly, by understanding the meaning of the word "adorn". Adorn, means, to 'make more beautiful, or attractive'. Wearing jewellery as part of your dress is not the same as spending an hour or two looking at the mirror to choose the best pair of earrings to go with the dress.

2. I'm going to paraphrase what Tintin often says - "Being a Christian doesn't mean you have to stop thinking". I believe that there is a big difference between 'being religious' and 'being spiritual'. If one is religious, then he/she would blindly follow what the Church said, without thinking or questioning for himself/herself. Unfortunately, many people fall into this bucket.

So that's how I figured that I don't have to follow the Church's diktat if I feel that it is wrong.

 

[Godson13]

Comparing modesty and lack of cheating with a husband having four wives, in turn 'sacrificing' his freedom for four wives if the woman takes off her earrings and makeup all together, otherwise it's her fault for him cheating.



Would Islam happen to interest you, by any chance? They allow the four wives, the burqa modesty and the woman to be at fault if the man rapes her.

Which one should I choose? One on hand you have a satanist who wants women to adore themselves with the immodesty of earrings and on the other hand you have Islamists that abuse and victimize women.

Which one should i choose?

 

[Godson13]

I guess married women should be grateful that their husbands did them the favor of marrying them.

Humility....learn to be humble. If you find a true christian husband then you should be grateful.

 

[Godson13]

My friend is a modest woman down to everything you just said. Her husband.. Cheated 7 times.
So yeah..that's not why men (or women) cheat.

If you are going to be modest then be modest with a man you know is a true conservative christian. There is not point in being modest if you are going to get married to a "player".

 

[Godson13]

I found your people! Its perfect for you! You should fit in nicely into a works righteousness community
1-800-Call -Amish.

the only thing with the Amish is that they may not be welcoming to people outside their community and i am not sure how true they are.

 

[blue_ladybug]

Modesty is no guarantee that your man won't cheat on you. You could be the most modest prude in the world, or the trampiest woman, and he probably would still cheat. So modesty isn't the ticket to keep a husband from hopping the fence to greener pastures. It may help somewhat, but it won't prevent it altogether.

 

[Godson13]

This bozo strikes a nerve with everyone. All he does is condemn and blame the ladies. I'm not saying it doesn't take two to tango, but he's still shifting the blame.

Pop, those statistics (if true) are horrifying! All of those lost souls. God!

I know, the truth is bitter to false Christians.

 

[Godson13]

pierced ears are a no-no, but what about clip on earrings? ah wait. no. still earrings.

Clip on earrings is different from piercing your ears. But even though it is also wrong.