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I find the OP to be some kind of backwoods, 1950's type of philosophy. I know it is supposed to be praising women, for giving up everything they are for their husbands, but we left that kind of marriage behind a long time ago.
A marriage is between two equal individuals, who love one another, follow God, and continue to serve God in various capacities. Marriage should be giving each person in the partnership the companionship and safety of another person in God. A marriage is not about giving up, but rather getting so much more than each person was on their own.
Rather than focus on trite details like last names (Every single one of my high school friends retain their maiden names except me - I was really tired of that difficult Polish name, too, and a lifetime of having to spell it for everyone) we should be focusing on giving and sharing on every level - emotional, spiritual, physical and social.
We are richer for our spouses, and true love allows the spouse to pursue his or her career/interests/callings without rancor or selfishness. A good marriage can be remembered for the desperate times, when we put ourselves on the line for our partner, cared for them in time of sickness or trial, and the continually growing bond that develops when the commitment to one another is 100%.
These trite exterior things mentioned in the OP, do not accurately describe what a real Christian marriage is about. It is about sacrifice by both partners. Putting the other person first. Not trying to make them into an image of what YOU want them to be, but rather supporting them in the transforming the Holy Spirit is making in their lives, and letting God be in charge. Even when it hurts or bucks the traditions you come from.
We need to define marriage in terms of love, caring, learning and growing together in God. Not by some external things a lot of which are not relevant in our society.
I'll finish with what I think a good husband is. It is someone who lifts you out of bed into a wheelchair to take you to the bathroom because the pain is so bad, you cannot walk. It is then lifting you back into a wheelchair then taking you back to bed and lifting you into the bed. Because you love your wife that much. It is finding a straw that it appeared we did not have, so I could have a drink of juice, when I could not reach the cup to my lips. It is cooking meals week after week for me, when he is clueless about cooking. That is what a real marriage is about! (I could reverse it, of course. But I would so much rather thank God for the incredible husband I have.)
A marriage is between two equal individuals, who love one another, follow God, and continue to serve God in various capacities. Marriage should be giving each person in the partnership the companionship and safety of another person in God. A marriage is not about giving up, but rather getting so much more than each person was on their own.
Rather than focus on trite details like last names (Every single one of my high school friends retain their maiden names except me - I was really tired of that difficult Polish name, too, and a lifetime of having to spell it for everyone) we should be focusing on giving and sharing on every level - emotional, spiritual, physical and social.
We are richer for our spouses, and true love allows the spouse to pursue his or her career/interests/callings without rancor or selfishness. A good marriage can be remembered for the desperate times, when we put ourselves on the line for our partner, cared for them in time of sickness or trial, and the continually growing bond that develops when the commitment to one another is 100%.
These trite exterior things mentioned in the OP, do not accurately describe what a real Christian marriage is about. It is about sacrifice by both partners. Putting the other person first. Not trying to make them into an image of what YOU want them to be, but rather supporting them in the transforming the Holy Spirit is making in their lives, and letting God be in charge. Even when it hurts or bucks the traditions you come from.
We need to define marriage in terms of love, caring, learning and growing together in God. Not by some external things a lot of which are not relevant in our society.
I'll finish with what I think a good husband is. It is someone who lifts you out of bed into a wheelchair to take you to the bathroom because the pain is so bad, you cannot walk. It is then lifting you back into a wheelchair then taking you back to bed and lifting you into the bed. Because you love your wife that much. It is finding a straw that it appeared we did not have, so I could have a drink of juice, when I could not reach the cup to my lips. It is cooking meals week after week for me, when he is clueless about cooking. That is what a real marriage is about! (I could reverse it, of course. But I would so much rather thank God for the incredible husband I have.)
A
You say "backwoods, 1950's type of philosophy." What if he is like that because he is that? (Okay, probably more 1960's.) I come from a truly diverse family. In the same side of the family, we have everything from polo-pony/charity balls, high-society folk to living in a homemade shack in the mountains. (As for in-between? Here I am, a South Jersey, live-in-the-burbs, kind of gal who moved into a big American city. lol) One thing I have to praise my family for. We are often amused at the diversity of lifestyles, but we don't chalk it up to things like "backwoods, 1950's type of philosophy." Maybe because we all come from the 1930's-1960's philosophies of accepting not all of us are the same.
Nothing wrong with "backwoods, 1950's type of philosophy" until someone makes it about that. From what I gather, (and again, I don't have cable TV so don't understand much about Duck Dynasty other than I feel like I know those people because they remind me of kin who do live that lifestyle), they aren't elegant people. They can't make high-society poetry. That doesn't mean he doesn't love his wife.
Poor guy! He can't win for losing. He's as attached by the Christian community as he is by nonbelievers. I bet his wife appreciated that ditty.
Nothing wrong with "backwoods, 1950's type of philosophy" until someone makes it about that. From what I gather, (and again, I don't have cable TV so don't understand much about Duck Dynasty other than I feel like I know those people because they remind me of kin who do live that lifestyle), they aren't elegant people. They can't make high-society poetry. That doesn't mean he doesn't love his wife.
Poor guy! He can't win for losing. He's as attached by the Christian community as he is by nonbelievers. I bet his wife appreciated that ditty.
She changes her name.. What's in a name?
Changes her home.. He does too
Leaves her family... So does he
Moves in with you.... Or he moves in with her, they usually get a place together.
Gets pregnant for you.... No so sure she's just doing it for the husband?
Bears children for you.... And then you pay for those children for the next 20 years
Pregnancy destroys her body.... Not always true, but even so, how does that benefit a man?
She gets fat... Thank goodness men never get fat.
Almost give up in the labor room due to the unexplanable pain. Over 30% get a caesarean section
Even the kids she delivers bear your name.. How is that construed as a sacrifice the wife makes?
Till the day she dies everything she does benefits you so.... Not my experience
who is really doing who a favor? ... Its really a mutual sacrifice
Jack, appreciate your wife today because it is not easy to be a woman
Jane, appreciate your husband today because it is not easy to be a man either.
I agree that a husband and wife should appreciate each other, but its a 2-way street.
It doesn't work so well when only one partners does all the giving... if at all.
K
Oh, come on, now. You must have an opinion you don't need shaped by others? 
Just messin' with ya. Still waiting impatiently. You thought I forgot. ha!
Just messin' with ya. Still waiting impatiently. You thought I forgot. ha!
Hahahhaa! Oh Im never behind the door in my opinions.My husband was a Democrat when we met, by election time that year he voted Republican.lol lol lol He cant believe he ever voted democrat.
G
Agricola, this makes me feel sad for you. Wow! Uhm, how do you get along these days?
The last few weddings I've been to, I've had watery eyes. I'm a guy. A man. Watery eyes at a wedding! No, I don't need a tissue. But I could easily shed tears. The vows and all they mean and suggest, and a man and woman make them to each other. And knowing the good and not so good times of marriage. And then knowing God. All that. So I get watery eyes.
You kept your vows...you kept yours. Hate to hear what happened.
Just feel bad for you.
The last few weddings I've been to, I've had watery eyes. I'm a guy. A man. Watery eyes at a wedding! No, I don't need a tissue. But I could easily shed tears. The vows and all they mean and suggest, and a man and woman make them to each other. And knowing the good and not so good times of marriage. And then knowing God. All that. So I get watery eyes.
You kept your vows...you kept yours. Hate to hear what happened.
Just feel bad for you.
C
I think a lot of men have big shoulders, as many times blame is put upon them. Women blame them for All their unhappiness. Not in all relationships, but in a young marriages when a woman might depend so much on their husband, this can present a big burden. Women have a tendency to feel loved only by the things that a husband might do for her; so she may constantly nag him to do things for her. Even if maybe he might not do many household chores, if he spends his day laboring & providing for his family, that is what really matters. Don't fault Him for everything. Mutual respect is so important. Build him up, don't break him down. Accept & Love first and foremost. Women and husbands need to remember that their utmost love is in the Father (God) first. Only the Lord is perfect, and all humans will let each other down (in any marriage- at one time or another). Forgiveness & love from the grace of God teaches us every day, how to create a marriage if unity. Remember, one day we all become one. None of us will be male or female.
U
He's highlighting the many things that women traditionally do and stating to men to appreciate these sacrifices. The point of it is not to brag on himself for all he does which is actually what you are complaining he's not doing, it's to put the spotlight on the wives and applaud them. Neither is he stereotyping anyone. He's commenting on what he knows and understands about marriage. The key point of the statement is to encourage men to appreciate their wives for all that they do. Personally i find it somewhat perverse to take this simple, well intended message and pick it apart and tear it down while criticizing the speaker to begin with. Seems with feminism becoming some commonplace men can't even encourage other men to appreciate their own wives without someone trying to twist it into something bad and demonize the man for the good deed.
And, as a man, when i read this, i didn't think 'hollywood stereotype'. I thought 'yeah, he's right, i need to remember this for when i get married'. And while he isn't married himself, it's pretty obvious the way the family as a whole view their wives. With much respect and appreciation both for what they do as wives, and also who they are as people and women.
And, as a man, when i read this, i didn't think 'hollywood stereotype'. I thought 'yeah, he's right, i need to remember this for when i get married'. And while he isn't married himself, it's pretty obvious the way the family as a whole view their wives. With much respect and appreciation both for what they do as wives, and also who they are as people and women.
L
Depending on where you from or on you were raised or on how the society expect the wife to be. Where I come from you are expected to obey, respect your husband and in-laws, women do not have much of a voice oropinions. I raise my boys differently, to respect, hounor and appreciate women. And for my daughter I wouldn't wish for her to marry in the similar situation like me, I know it sounds bad, but I wouldn't wish for her to go through the difficulties I went through because of culture, and I'm not sorry that I want the better life for my kids than I did.
A
I wish hubby could have gotten lessons on how to do that from you. Twice in his life he had good friends that were liberals and nonbelievers. Both times it took him a good ten years to get through to them the importance of God. Both became Republicans AND Catholics! Apparently he was doing something right but not right enough or that fast. lol
K
Haha I guess Im just pretty straight forward.When we first started dating he asked me to go see a Micheal Moore move,the anti-christ to my family,lol. I said "ya sure,I know what I think and believe". So we went and I sat and listened like a nice little lady.
Then he made the deadly mistake of asking what I thought. I said "ok,just remember,you asked!" I hit him with so many fact and truths his head was spinning. He said "I never thought of it that way!" We talked a lot over the months and by the time elections rolled around he voted Republican. He said " I cant believe I was so blinded by liberal news."