Subtle ways to let someone know you are NOT interested!

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H

Hellooo

Guest
#21
I used that line recently....

... on my girlfriend. :p


I have to post this here because it makes sense.



Even guys can face this problem. Sometimes, we do not say that we are not interested because we do not want to be rude. :/
This happened to me while I was eating at a bar of a Mexican restaurant (taco Tuesday, amirite )...i was reading, and the man next to me kept interrupting me to ask me a bunch of questions, even though I kept pointedly returning my attention to my kindle

All I want is to read Harry Potter in peace, while grubbing on tacos, is that too much to ask?
 

Born_Again

Senior Member
Nov 15, 2014
1,585
129
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#22
This happened to me while I was eating at a bar of a Mexican restaurant (taco Tuesday, amirite )...i was reading, and the man next to me kept interrupting me to ask me a bunch of questions, even though I kept pointedly returning my attention to my kindle

All I want is to read Harry Potter in peace, while grubbing on tacos, is that too much to ask?
I feel that is completely reasonable. LOL
 
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kenthomas27

Guest
#24
In my experience, subtle ways don't work, you have to tell them straight out, repeatedly

Maybe NukePooch's idea is the most efficient
So what I'm hearing is there's still a chance then.
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
10,464
2,692
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#25
i feel left out because i don't know the struggle.

the struggle is real, but not for melita. lol :D
 
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kenthomas27

Guest
#27
This happened to me while I was eating at a bar of a Mexican restaurant (taco Tuesday, amirite )...i was reading, and the man next to me kept interrupting me to ask me a bunch of questions, even though I kept pointedly returning my attention to my kindle

All I want is to read Harry Potter in peace, while grubbing on tacos, is that too much to ask?
Next time let him see the picture of even rattlesnakes running away from you.
 
S

sassylady

Guest
#28
As my son told me once, men are dumb, you have to spell it out. I would not be subtle but you can speak the truth in love. Just say I'm not interested in a relationship right now, etc.
 
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coby

Guest
#29
As my son told me once, men are dumb, you have to spell it out. I would not be subtle but you can speak the truth in love. Just say I'm not interested in a relationship right now, etc.
Lol when the guy I went on a date with once said he wasn't interested and I was so sad and needed a hug, my sweet 9 year old son said: Mom it's simple. Girls are stupid. Boys don't like girls and women are just grown up girls. Of course men don't like 'em. Hahahahahahahahahaha.
 
Dec 31, 2015
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#30
All I have to do is mention I have kids...if that doesn't work, I exit. There have been times it's been easier than others. Because I am still not completely cured of passivity; I have ended up in awkward moments where I am trying to figure out how to dodge a man. For the most part, if I really like someone, I tend to completely avoid them.
Yes, I have issues.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,409
13,750
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#31
"I'm not your type."
 
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coby

Guest
#32
Lol once a 40 + year old weird guy was interested in me when I was 20 or something. Hey, he said, I like you. Do you want to marry me? Saw the guy a few times because he was from church. I said: You should never just marry someone, only the one God has for you. I'll pray that you will find her. Lol he stayed nice and didn't wonder how I could be so certain that I was not the one for him.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#33
All I have to do is mention I have kids...if that doesn't work, I exit. There have been times it's been easier than others. Because I am still not completely cured of passivity; I have ended up in awkward moments where I am trying to figure out how to dodge a man. For the most part, if I really like someone, I tend to completely avoid them.
Yes, I have issues.
A good example of ineffective communication hoping someone gets the clue, instead of saying what you feel.
But saying you have kids is a particularly ineffective approach in this day and age. There are a lot of single moms out there, either from divorce or previous relationships or that just have had a kid on their own.
And not all guys are run off by the notion either. My last gf, who i was wanting to marry, had a kid with special needs. One of my ex's had 3 kids, that i moved across the country to be with. One ex had 2 kids.
Though at my age and my current situation i have to be more selective than when i was younger. Age of the kids matters more to me now than it would have 10 years ago.
 
Dec 31, 2015
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#35
A good example of ineffective communication hoping someone gets the clue, instead of saying what you feel.
But saying you have kids is a particularly ineffective approach in this day and age. There are a lot of single moms out there, either from divorce or previous relationships or that just have had a kid on their own.
And not all guys are run off by the notion either. My last gf, who i was wanting to marry, had a kid with special needs. One of my ex's had 3 kids, that i moved across the country to be with. One ex had 2 kids.
Though at my age and my current situation i have to be more selective than when i was younger. Age of the kids matters more to me now than it would have 10 years ago.
Saying I have kids doesn't work with black men mostly, but white guys usually react to it. I think I did a decent job acknowledging I am not the most articulate...
 
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spunkycat08

Senior Member
Dec 7, 2013
403
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#37
The problem with hints is that they are indirect.

Being indirect can cause misunderstanding.

Best to be polite and direct.
 
Aug 2, 2009
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#38
These have worked on me really well in the past...

After telling her how I feel about her.. "Awwww you're so sweet."- then she changes the subject...

or, "I only like you as a friend"

Yea, you're talking to the voice of experience here! :p:p
 
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LiJo

Guest
#40
I usually tell them I only like them as a friend....it works most of the time although some men do take it as a challenge and then I have to tell them I'm not interested at all.