You shouldn't feel bad about having tried. The thing about women with higher BMA and insecurities is that they are 'so concerned about what others think of their body'. If they want to change it, they need to focus on it, focus on their self, and loving their self more. They shouldn't focus on being shamed, or feeling bad about it, or other people judging them.
I mean going home after being shamed (in their perspective only) at the gym, and probably eating to feel better, this is a very negative and unhealthy habit which has no positive outcome.
At least one thing was revealed by this, the level of her insecurity. And insecurity is erroneous.
From my experience, women who have a problem with their body or who are a higher BMA tend to play victim a lot.
I never understand why some women do not treasure their temple. I feel like maybe it has something to do with their childhood. Maybe try and find out when she started not liking her body so much, it might be an opportunity to feel more connected and uplifted together, rather than a brick wall. Isn't it the 'source' or 'origin' of our problems, which we do not speak about, that weigh us down?
Some women are actually happy being overweight, although very rarely. Of course if someone is happy being that way then it is your job to appreciate them being that way. But 9 times out of 10, these women hate the body they are in. And unless they can 'face the fear' of making an effort to change it, then it will never change. And then insecurity wins. And insecurity is such an ungodly thing really.
In this situation, if she is trying to make you feel bad about it, and yet the truth is she hates the way her body is, then don't fall for her being a victim and having the grovel for her forgiveness. It is this which is ungodly, it is feeding a fear that is in her. You had 'good intention' and she turned it into 'bad intention' yet the intention is what it truthfully is, 'good intention' and that never changes.
Gym is a positive thing, for anyone. I've known obese people who decided to get over their fears and do it. Everyone feels bad when they first join a gym it's natural. But after you go a few times and make a habit of it, you enjoy it, you enjoy the buzz, feeling better, the confidence boost.
Gym is not just about losing weight or getting a better body, it is about boosting your hormones, and feeling better about yourself.
The perfect relationship to me is that you BOTH take time, to love what the other person loves. I really don't understand why people so different will be together, and yes maybe accept differences, but will never take time to understand (by experience) and love each others differences. In marriage you are supposed to be in union with each other spiritually, yet many hold physical aspects as so important that they 'brick wall' many parts of them. That's not spiritual, and it affects your relationship. This is why people split up, divorce, etc. And usually, they continue to say they are the victim. Every person who ever hurt me taught me something. They taught me to love myself more, trust others more, and have more faith. Thank you hurtful people in my life!
Most people settle for 2nd best in each other and never try to make that 2nd best 1st best, which is what you are trying. Insecurity doesn't disappear if you ignore it. It is better that it is out in the open now, and it is 'not your fault'.
