What can you offer?
- Thread starter Tommy379
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Maxwel: I know the assertions against which you are arguing. I just don't see where anybody mentioned them before you started arguing. This thread never was about "get out and find a mate." It was about "what kind of benefits could you bring to a relationship, should you have one?"
I even went back and read the OP again, multiple times. In fact after your last post I went back to read it a fourth time. I cannot see anywhere Tommy was saying any of the things against which you are so vociferously arguing.
I also feel you are not comprehending what I'm saying, so I'm going to make this as clear as possible:
YOU ARE MAKING UP AN ARGUMENT JUST SO YOU CAN ARGUE!
That clear enough?
I even went back and read the OP again, multiple times. In fact after your last post I went back to read it a fourth time. I cannot see anywhere Tommy was saying any of the things against which you are so vociferously arguing.
I also feel you are not comprehending what I'm saying, so I'm going to make this as clear as possible:
YOU ARE MAKING UP AN ARGUMENT JUST SO YOU CAN ARGUE!
That clear enough?
The False Dilemma is clearly asserted in the second paragraph of the Opening Post
False Dilemma in Opening Post:
1. Method A: A christian can be unassertive, and wait for God to bring a girl to drop in his lap.
"I don't believe God brings anyone a spouse."
2. Method B: A Christian can be assertive, and go out and get a spouse without any help from God.
"I believe we have to go on our own to meet someone"
If there is any questions that I'm misunderstanding Tommy, and this isn't what he meant... we can look at other posts in this thread, or in other threads, and find his point of view on this issue is exactly as I state it.
Again, my point is not to accuse Tommy of any bad intentions.
You can make an assertion and have perfectly good intentions.
My point is simply to show that this IS a false dilemma, and we should be taking a more balanced and biblical approach.
Lynx,
Are you genuinely accusing me of all kinds of bad intentions because I'm suggesting we put God back into our search for a spouse?
I'm suggesting we put God back into our search for a spouse... and... you're upset with me in some way?
Seriously?
I would expect you to be in complete agreement.
The things I'm talking about were asserted right in the opening post... and you're accusing me of bad intentions for mentioning them.
I don't think I've accused you, or Tommy, or anyone else of any bad intentions... but you feel fine to accuse me of bad intentions.
Very odd.
I suppose if I'd gone off topic by talking about bratwurst, like everyone else, that would be fine.
But if I carefully examine the actual words in the OP, and talk about something which is both IN THE OPENING POST, and also MEANINGFUL... then I'm a bad guy?
Very odd.
Maybe you've had a bad day.
Maybe you've had several bad days.
Maybe I remind you of someone else that had a bad day.
Maybe you just misunderstood my intentions.
Maybe I said things in some particular way that just sounded offensive to you.
Maybe you just discriminate against the whole cyclops race.
I have no idea.
How about we all take a deep breath and relax.
If I've offended you in some personal way, then I apologize.
But disagreeing with Tommy doesn't happen to be a sin,
and I can disagree with someone and still like the person just fine.
I think we all need to relax.
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He did not say anything of the sort. You (loosely, VERY loosely) rephrased what he said, and in doing so you greatly changed the meaning.
Again: This is not a thread for debate. This is a thread for introspection about the things you have to offer to a potential spouse. I still can't understand why you keep wanting to argue against stuff nobody even said.
I also can't understand why you rephrased what he said so loosely. I went back and read the OP for the (I lost count) time and there is a very large discrepancy between what was there and what was in your last post.
But then I also don't really understand how a modern car works, but I drive one every day. Work six days a week, church Sunday, every single day I drive something I don't really understand. So I guess some things I don't have to understand.
Again: This is not a thread for debate. This is a thread for introspection about the things you have to offer to a potential spouse. I still can't understand why you keep wanting to argue against stuff nobody even said.
I also can't understand why you rephrased what he said so loosely. I went back and read the OP for the (I lost count) time and there is a very large discrepancy between what was there and what was in your last post.
But then I also don't really understand how a modern car works, but I drive one every day. Work six days a week, church Sunday, every single day I drive something I don't really understand. So I guess some things I don't have to understand.
A
The thing that stood out for me was that the op "could be fun, or it could be a difficult exercise that reveals how we value ourselves." I didn’t see anything off-base with that in a singles forum. I was having fun reading the responses. 
The statements Tommy made about God not bringing anyone a spouse and that folks should go on their own to meet someone, I understood to mean that people should make an effort to pursue a spouse and that God wasn't likely to just drop someone in a person's lap. I’m betting that every married person on this site put some effort into finding their wife or husband. I didn't assume that Tommy was advising folks to disqualify God's wisdom and guidance in the matter.
Our young brother Tommy is a Christian. I also noticed in his profile his favorite scripture is: “He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.” I highly doubt he is suggesting people not follow the Spirit’s leading.
The statements Tommy made about God not bringing anyone a spouse and that folks should go on their own to meet someone, I understood to mean that people should make an effort to pursue a spouse and that God wasn't likely to just drop someone in a person's lap. I’m betting that every married person on this site put some effort into finding their wife or husband. I didn't assume that Tommy was advising folks to disqualify God's wisdom and guidance in the matter.
Our young brother Tommy is a Christian. I also noticed in his profile his favorite scripture is: “He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.” I highly doubt he is suggesting people not follow the Spirit’s leading.
Ok, so getting back on topic...
I’ve been contemplating this thread awhile and decided that if a good-natured, outdoorsy, fearless, ol’ science geek crossed my path and I discovered he was a friend of Christ, I’d offer him my faithful heart, yummy meals and fun adventures.
I’ve been contemplating this thread awhile and decided that if a good-natured, outdoorsy, fearless, ol’ science geek crossed my path and I discovered he was a friend of Christ, I’d offer him my faithful heart, yummy meals and fun adventures.
The thing that stood out for me was that the op "could be fun, or it could be a difficult exercise that reveals how we value ourselves." I didn’t see anything off-base with that in a singles forum. I was having fun reading the responses.
The statements Tommy made about God not bringing anyone a spouse and that folks should go on their own to meet someone, I understood to mean that people should make an effort to pursue a spouse and that God wasn't likely to just drop someone in a person's lap. I’m betting that every married person on this site put some effort into finding their wife or husband. I didn't assume that Tommy was advising folks to disqualify God's wisdom and guidance in the matter.
Our young brother Tommy is a Christian. I also noticed in his profile his favorite scripture is: “He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.” I highly doubt he is suggesting people not follow the Spirit’s leading.
The statements Tommy made about God not bringing anyone a spouse and that folks should go on their own to meet someone, I understood to mean that people should make an effort to pursue a spouse and that God wasn't likely to just drop someone in a person's lap. I’m betting that every married person on this site put some effort into finding their wife or husband. I didn't assume that Tommy was advising folks to disqualify God's wisdom and guidance in the matter.
Our young brother Tommy is a Christian. I also noticed in his profile his favorite scripture is: “He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.” I highly doubt he is suggesting people not follow the Spirit’s leading.
No no no. There's a difference between camping and other activities.
I'm not really big on visiting tourist attractions. But in the right company I would go, more for the company than for the sightseeing.
I'm not really much into going to concerts, even for groups I really like. But in the right company I would go, more for the company than the music.
There are many things I would do if my friends were doing it, just because I like to hang out with my friends. Camping is not one of them. It would not matter one bit who was in the tent, I'm staying in the house. I'll leave the porch light on for you to find your way back out of the woods and I'll leave some food in the fridge that you can reheat when you get home. If I'm asleep when you get home, be really quiet.
I'm not really big on visiting tourist attractions. But in the right company I would go, more for the company than for the sightseeing.
I'm not really much into going to concerts, even for groups I really like. But in the right company I would go, more for the company than the music.
There are many things I would do if my friends were doing it, just because I like to hang out with my friends. Camping is not one of them. It would not matter one bit who was in the tent, I'm staying in the house. I'll leave the porch light on for you to find your way back out of the woods and I'll leave some food in the fridge that you can reheat when you get home. If I'm asleep when you get home, be really quiet.
The OP was an excellent presentation and an honest assessment. I especially agree with the second paragraph. If you're lonely and ready to settle down you should pray to God to search and find the one of your heart's desire. However, like it was stated elsewhere God is not going to drop a spouse on your lap. You have to be prepared to act when the time is right. Accept the one who God finds for you for who that person is and that person will do the same for you.
A lot of people remain single even though they are lonely and desire a mate because of fear or rejection, fear of commitment, or set high unrealistic standards, waiting for all of the 'I's" to be dotted, the 'T's' crossed and all of the lights green. This type of person will most likely remain alone for some time to come because lack of trust in God.
A lot of people remain single even though they are lonely and desire a mate because of fear or rejection, fear of commitment, or set high unrealistic standards, waiting for all of the 'I's" to be dotted, the 'T's' crossed and all of the lights green. This type of person will most likely remain alone for some time to come because lack of trust in God.
I simply cannot resist interjecting here that the proper term is wiener.
An Oscar Mayer Wiener in macaroni and cheese sounds delightful
I used to eat such concoctions myself
One would never put a hot dog in pasta
At least, not one such as I
[video=youtube;aNddW2xmZp8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNddW2xmZp8[/video]
This song, and the wiener-mobile, were quite famous in my time
An Oscar Mayer Wiener in macaroni and cheese sounds delightful
I used to eat such concoctions myself
One would never put a hot dog in pasta
At least, not one such as I
[video=youtube;aNddW2xmZp8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNddW2xmZp8[/video]
This song, and the wiener-mobile, were quite famous in my time
