FB has connected me with some people that I started to go to Church with, all of them have left the Church some are growing in the Lord and the others have shown that they were not part of the body of Christ. It was that type of Church too, it had cultish characteristics to it if someone left the Church you were not susposed to talk to them because they might influance you to believe tha the Church had problems and it did.
I realized that I used the wrong words for my attire, I am not sure where you live but I live in Southern California and I was a heroin addict as well and my heritage is Mexican so I dressed like a Cholo or what people assumed was the Cholo look, people always asked my if I was from Victory Chapel and they always assumed I had done prison time because of the way I looked even with dressing. Just to let you knpow if you are not familar with Victory Chapel a large majority are ex-cons, herion addicts and/or were in gangs. After leaving that first Church, I started attending the Calvary Chapel's and I was really got into studying the Bible and theology, after studying how the 10 commandments bring us to the knowledge of our sins. Which lead to the understanding of how God had to extend His grace to us or we could never be saved by His regenerating grace. Now as an old man people still think that same thing about me, but when they understand that I believe in the Doctrines of Grace it throws them off, not sure why but it does.
I find it interesting that those that are still growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ have not come to understand the Doctrines of Grace. One of them has even written a book on Arminianism and their view of grace, the atonement and thier view of how salvation works or how the order is and he had a website. From what I understand he does not still do the website and I do not know what the name of the book(s) are, others have gone back to thier Pentecostal roots, others have come to understand eternal security and still go to the Calvary Chapel's but do not hold to the Doctrines of Grace.
Since my life has not went as well when it comes to marriage my life has not went as well as yours. I've been married twice, met my first wife in that first Church I attended she stopped going to Church about two years before she left me. She got pregant about 6 months after leaving, I tried to support her through the pregnancy to the point I was in the delivery room with her. I was willing to work it out and it messed me up when after being up all night for the delivery, I went home to take a nap and when I returned the babies father was there, that hurt. But the baby she has never met her real father, she calls me dad, she staied here with me and her sister with-in the last 4 months.
My second wife was also attending Church when I met her, when she left she had a boyfriend with-in 4 months and possibly was dating after leaving me, but I do not know that for sure. That was about 10 years ago and she did something that hurt me deeply, to the point that 6 weeks ago at my sisters 60th birthday party we were looking at pictures and a picture of her daughter was being looked at and I started to cry and was messed up for the rest of the week. I was very much in love with her, my first wife was a basic set up marriage of the Church, I did love her but my second wife was more of someone I fell in love with before we were married, were my first wife I fell in love with after we were married.
So I have had my good times with the Lord and I have had my low times, yet He was with me in those times that caused me to grow in His grace and knowledge of Him, it was a beautiful time of growth.
Anyway I am not trying to bum anyone out so I will stop, pray for me to be healed from the hurt and pain of my second divorce, thanks for all prayers in advance.