What Happens When That Attractive Person You Marry... Loses Their Attractiveness?

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Faith-n-Christ

Senior Member
May 12, 2016
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FULL beards are trendy now with YOUNG guys! Lol
these young kids around HERE are trying for the biker beards. untame and messy. like ZZ Top. I still enjoy a full, clean, well groomed beard. like the 80s. It also depends on the man, some look great clean shaved, some rock a go-tee and some are maturely hansome in the beards below.

 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
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these young kids around HERE are trying for the biker beards. untame and messy. like ZZ Top. I still enjoy a full, clean, well groomed beard. like the 80s. It also depends on the man, some look great clean shaved, some rock a go-tee and some are maturely hansome in the beards below.

Great eyes..lots of bad plastic surgery now though..lol
 

Faith-n-Christ

Senior Member
May 12, 2016
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Great eyes..lots of bad plastic surgery now though..lol
I wouldn't know about how he looks today. I don't follow stars. Did not know he had plastic surgery either. what a shame. I thought he looked good the way he was. The last video I watched him in, he had aged a lot. I thought it was the go-tee that made the difference in his appearance.

 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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I wouldn't know about how he looks today. I don't follow stars. Did not know he had plastic surgery either. what a shame. I thought he looked good the way he was. The last video I watched him in, he had aged a lot. I thought it was the go-tee that made the difference in his appearance.

Guess he had face lift..cheek implants and lots of botox and eyelid lifts...


Screenshot_2018-08-03-20-58-17.png
 

Faith-n-Christ

Senior Member
May 12, 2016
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Guess he had face lift..cheek implants and lots of botox and eyelid lifts...


View attachment 186171
so sad, They wanted to give me Botox injections for migraines a few years back. I politely told them where they could put that idea, and turned to ginger and turmeric. It is so sad that this world is so cosmetic. I'm mean sure I find some guys more hansome than others. But they shouldn't go having surgery because of someone's opinion. The lack of self-esteem is out of control. Some men find me beautiful some don't and I can live with that. I'm not gonna let some butcher tear up my face because some men don't. I honestly don't understand it.
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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so sad, They wanted to give me Botox injections for migraines a few years back. I politely told them where they could put that idea, and turned to ginger and turmeric. It is so sad that this world is so cosmetic. I'm mean sure I find some guys more hansome than others. But they shouldn't go having surgery because of someone's opinion. The lack of self-esteem is out of control. Some men find me beautiful some don't and I can live with that. I'm not gonna let some butcher tear up my face because some men don't. I honestly don't understand it.
I sometimes think the prettier you are when younger..the harder to accept the aging process..i see it all the time at work..mostly with the people that have lots of money ;(
 
S

Sweetmorningdew78

Guest
Some people are more interested in looks but looks fade we loose it as we age... So when you fall for looks you will be in trouble in the future when the person beside you is wrinkled with gray hair and flabby muscles. Fall in love with the person's character so that when everything about that person's looks is out of proportion 😂 you still got the real turn on within ❤
 

jameen

Senior Member
Feb 5, 2018
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Hey Everyone!

We've had a few threads running about what we find attractive in a potential date and/or spouse. The general consensus seems to be that we all want (and some would say need) to find someone who is attractive to us, but the definition of what's attractive or not will vary greatly between individuals.

* What happens after 20, 30, or 50 years, and 20, 30, or 50 pounds? Do you think you'll still be attracted to that person?

* What will happen after someone loses their attractiveness to you (or you to them)? (This goes far beyond physical appearance, too--what if the person you marry becomes ill, and it completely changes their demeanor and personality, possibly making them bitter and critical instead of loving and kind?)

* How do you feel about staying with someone if you are no longer attracted to them?

* How would you feel (and what would you do) if your spouse was no longer attracted to you?

As Christians, if we marry, we commit to staying with someone no matter what, and I have to be honest in that when I really think about it (and see the challenges couples deal with as they get older), I find it to be quite intimidating.

I'm posting a few pictures as examples of the Biblical truth that "beauty is fleeting" (Proverbs 31:30.) I know not everyone will find these people attractive but I just wanted to show how even The Most Beautiful of the Beautiful might not stay so beautiful forever.

What do you think?

(Please stand by... My original post is too long due to pictures I want to include. Give me just a few minutes and I will hopefully get them to post.) :)
Is that a problem? simply ask your wife or husband to beautify himself/herself because you don't want to see her becoming unattractive anymore.

I met some older people who are still attractive because they do not forget to fix themselves well.

they are also health conscious and take care of their proper hygiene well. they also dress well.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
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When you grow old with someone, you don't notice.
 

FVH

Member
Jul 28, 2018
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Some people are more interested in looks but looks fade we loose it as we age... So when you fall for looks you will be in trouble in the future when the person beside you is wrinkled with gray hair and flabby muscles. Fall in love with the person's character so that when everything about that person's looks is out of proportion 😂 you still got the real turn on within ❤
For sure character plays the more important role, but I also think looks do matter. You do want to be physically attracted to someone as well, right? I think physical attractiveness is something you can notice at first, but should not be the end all. There's this study that shows you are attracted to your friends - if you like a person for who they are, you're inclined to think they are more physically attractive as well. Similarly, someone who is very good looking, but has a less good looking character, becomes physically less attractive.

So for sure, definitely fall in love with someone's character - but again if you genuinely like that person for who they are, the physical attraction will also be there.

I'm not sure when someone starts changing/becoming less attractive though. I think a range of things can cause you to become less attracted to someone, even in marriage. If it's PURELY physical (ie someone gains a lot of weight by overeating) then it probably really depends on what the relationship is built on. Of course the other partner would (hopefully??) not want to leave and love their spouse as they always did. But let's say it's a couple that has a shared hobby of working out, eating healthy, etc. that they always did together and one of them has let it go.. I don't know. I don't think it'd be reason for divorce or anything, but I think part of marriage (and your own life) is to take care of yourself as well - or at least try. So if people lose their super model looks, yea that's life for ya. We all grow old and change. But if you change from being a sportsloving person into severely obese by your own doing, I wouldn't expect a spouse to be happy about it. I would expect them to encourage you to make some life changes.

If the loss of attractiveness is not purely physical (someone had mentioned having an alcoholic for a spouse), it can be a whole different, more complicated problem..
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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Is that a problem? simply ask your wife or husband to beautify himself/herself because you don't want to see her becoming unattractive anymore.

I met some older people who are still attractive because they do not forget to fix themselves well.

they are also health conscious and take care of their proper hygiene well. they also dress well.
I dont think going to your spouse and asking them if they can do so n so so they cam be attractive again will go over real well..soymds like recipies for hurt or offended feelings..
 
Nov 26, 2012
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I’m pretty sure God factored these concerns in when He engineered us. Attraction is always based on need or desire. When you are younger your sexual hormones are higher because that is the optimal time for child rearing. Once that stage is over we fade and die. So we aren’t constantly hungry for sex into our golden years, the Lord designed it for testosterone to drastically drop. This prepares the man to be less sexual, and less combative in the relationship, enabling a deeper relationship, not dependent on sexual fulfillment to take place. Before society dictated that a successful man was wealthy, steering men to be workaholics to instil self worth. Now it is promoted that success is based on how sexually satisfying you are, for both men and women. This takes the focus off of the commitment to family. Women feel they need to be sexier, and men more muscular with an erection rigid enough to strike a match on (too far?). Frankly, commercialism only works when people feel inferior. Promoting that you could improve by purchasing their products, is what creates economy.
 

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
Aug 2, 2009
24,646
4,305
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these young kids around HERE are trying for the biker beards. untame and messy. like ZZ Top. I still enjoy a full, clean, well groomed beard. like the 80s. It also depends on the man, some look great clean shaved, some rock a go-tee and some are maturely hansome in the beards below.

I agree. Today's generation doesn't seem to have a sense for aesthetics. Wild, unkept beards and big kardashian-sized butts are all the rage with them.
 

Deva_1972

Senior Member
Nov 3, 2011
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Attraction is definitely NOT just looks! I might find someone who is known for his looks and find him attractive but if there are no traits that I feel drawn to personality wise, then its not going to happen! And there have been guys that I have been attracted to, both physically and emotionally and often I have no idea why, because often I may not have been attracted to their type of look with anyone previously - it may be something about them that attracts me and I don't know why! I do agree though, that looks do matter...its part of the whole deal. And truthfully, we all do want people who take care of themselves and don't let themselves go...its one thing to lose looks out of no fault of your own, such as a genuine illness but being careless and uncaring of how you take care of yourself is not attractive, plain and simple! Someone mentioned that as you both grow older together, there is less of a notice in that, and you can still see the same person you married most times, even in ill health....there are so many different variables and each situation varies but these are the basic things I have noticed and experienced :)
 

Deva_1972

Senior Member
Nov 3, 2011
201
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I actually JUST remembered something that gives a good example of this type of thing. My brother and sister in law were very thin when they both met and there was a time when both of them...well, added a significant amount of weight to their frames. This was going on for a year or so before my brother said to sis in law very kindly and even jokingly but seriously, to get it all out in the open, "would you have been attracted to me if you married me this way?" She said no and through all that they were able to be real about it and they both changed TOGETHER...I think that is a great approach to deal with these things.