I'm in a relationship now!

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thatfizzyguy

Guest
#41
I would be happy if you proved me wrong--in fact, I'm hoping you will.

But she's going to need to achieve a lot more qualifications than "about accurate."
Yeah I get ya course I can believe a mix up because her grammar isn't too good like that of someone with a poor education like she says "though" a lot.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#43
Joe...
You're being catfished. Don't send money please.
 
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thatfizzyguy

Guest
#44
Yeah I get ya course I can believe a mix up because her grammar isn't too good like that of someone with a poor education like she says "though" a lot.
Also she doesn't seem to comprehend explanations of things too good either I find myself having to explain things a little more I guess you could say dumbed down and plain.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,590
17,056
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Tennessee
#45
Update...
Well a lot of stuff looks like it checks out though I think she's a bit mixed up on details for instance on her profile it says Louisiana and she said Texas but, that's right next to Texas so that's about accurate.
She might be a Cajun that prefers hot Texas cooking. Yeah, Texas is close so she was fairly accurate, just needs to brush up on her geography. There are a few women that are mixed up but that's not necessarily a bad thing. :)
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#48
I'm telling you Joe. I scambait as a hobby. This ain't real.

When I told you to get out there, I meant real life.

Don't send money please.
 
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thatfizzyguy

Guest
#49
She might be a Cajun that prefers hot Texas cooking. Yeah, Texas is close so she was fairly accurate, just needs to brush up on her geography. There are a few women that are mixed up but that's not necessarily a bad thing. :)
Yeah that would make sense and no that's not a bad thing I mean granted I hope she doesn't get too much mixed up lol but, I kind of like how we get a bit confused with each other let's see she's poor in grammar and geography I'm poor in cell phone stuff like I had to have her explain to me about the hang outs app because I had never used it before so I guess she's more technology inclined.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,590
17,056
113
69
Tennessee
#50
Joe...
You're being catfished. Don't send money please.
While single and living in Florida I had a woman scam me out of $1000. She gave me some hard luck story about how the door of her oven had just fallen off unto the floor and that her car had a flat tire. After I sent a check to her she writes me back and says that she just bought a plane ticket to Colorado to see some guy she was conversing with. She ended up marrying the guy. I ended up marrying her sister. A few years later I was talking to her husband and asked how he was being treated. He said his wife treats him like a dog. Yeah, I'm thinking that this guy is blaming me for marrying this lady.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,590
17,056
113
69
Tennessee
#52
Yeah that would make sense and no that's not a bad thing I mean granted I hope she doesn't get too much mixed up lol but, I kind of like how we get a bit confused with each other let's see she's poor in grammar and geography I'm poor in cell phone stuff like I had to have her explain to me about the hang outs app because I had never used it before so I guess she's more technology inclined.
I'm tech challenged as well but my wife is pretty handy with electronic devices.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
#54
If I ever went back to pursue the field of psychology, I think there should be a specialized division for those who catfish and even more so for those who choose to fall for it, despite being heavily warned.

During the time of my membership here on CC, I usually have a current group of people whom I talk to regularly and we have often tried to warn people when they fall in love with someone who sounds suspicious. I always ask others what they think and have observed in the threads because I don't want to judge a situation prematurely or unfairly, but when it's several people noticing a number of discrepancies, most of us would usually try to warn the person in some way. I've lost count of how many people my CC friends have tried to warn over the years.

But not a single person listened. Every single one would say something like, "No, this person is real... they just have (such and such excuse, problem, story... multiplied about 1,000 time over)," even when the warning signs were glaringly obvious. They would say that other people were just jealous and trying to ruin their happiness. In other words... They put blinders over their eyes, plugs in their ears, and shouted over everyone else until they convinced themselves that what they chose to believe in their own mind was real. They would say that we couldn't prove that this person wasn't who they said they were...

But the problem is, they couldn't prove that this person actually WAS the person they said they were either. I don't know of a single person who actually went through and got to meet their suspected catfish, even though they tried repeatedly, let alone worked out a relationship with them. Rather, they would all come back with a shattered heart and then want everyone to listen to them indefinitely about how much they had been hurt, even though people had tried to warn them the entire time.

I know I should have given up trying to warn people long ago. No one ever believes.

But when you see good people here with big, loving hearts... It's hard to sit back and watch them being taken for a ride.

I hope you are the exception, Joe. I really do. Come back and tell me I was wrong if I am, please.

But please, I am genuinely asking you as a sister in Christ--listen carefully to what the people in your own thread are trying to tell you.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,920
9,669
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#55
I don't know I still can't be sure of that yet...
Joe, please don't put your heart on the line with this person. You sound...rather enamored with her despite having never met her.. And listen to Tommy and Seoul, they have much experience dealing with these sorts of people..
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,590
17,056
113
69
Tennessee
#56
While single and living in Florida I had a woman scam me out of $1000. She gave me some hard luck story about how the door of her oven had just fallen off unto the floor and that her car had a flat tire. After I sent a check to her she writes me back and says that she just bought a plane ticket to Colorado to see some guy she was conversing with. She ended up marrying the guy. I ended up marrying her sister. A few years later I was talking to her husband and asked how he was being treated. He said his wife treats him like a dog. Yeah, I'm thinking that this guy is blaming me for marrying this lady.
To avoid any misunderstanding this woman that I married was my late second wife and not my current and last wife Darlene and happened in 2002. Yeah, I screwed up but by the grace of God there was a purpose as He provided a ministry for me in loving and taking care of a sweet spiritual daughter of his. I could have declined to take on this challenge as He told me to count the cost before I decided as she was in declining health already at the age of 47 and would die sooner rather than later. I decided to accept and ended up marrying her a few months later. I never looked back, not even after she died in Maine and I was on a bus going back home to Florida with a crushed spirit and broken heart.
 
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thatfizzyguy

Guest
#57
Joe, please don't put your heart on the line with this person. You sound...rather enamored with her despite having never met her.. And listen to Tommy and Seoul, they have much experience dealing with these sorts of people..
Yeah I am taking their advice into consideration and I feel my heart's into this but, I'll stay vigilant of any "irregularities" I mean despite that she seems like the one for me I am analyzing her and she is analyzing me and I keep saying things like "I love you" to her because for all I know I do and she is real and who she says she is but, any "irregularities" like asking me to sign anything fast or send her big amounts like 200 and up then I'll be sure to insist upon what for and if it sounds fishy then I'll give her up.
Also I keep her to what she says like "being serious" "open and honest" and "not about money" just as I would expect her to do with me.
Also I know we haven't met face to face but, she has sent me pictures of herself fully clothed with real objects in the background like a bed and window and in each picture she has her phone in her hand taking the picture and her status on hangouts fading showing her actually taking the pictures instead of me having to just assume that her profile picture is really her I mean I know that still sounds pretty slim on this being true to some but, so far nothing quite you know like "outlandish" though she does seem to get real nervous like me, ever since we been talking about 3 to 4 days she has been concerned about not getting hurt and having a serious relationship.
She even told me personal stuff about herself without me asking just like I tend to here and on other sites like for example how her uncle became her legal guardian, father died in a car crash I think she's just real jittery a lot and doesn't much think out what to say because she's not too trusting.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
#58
After being on CC for a few years, it becomes easier to notice patterns in some people's behavior.

I am certainly not knocking online possibilities for relationships, seeing as I have often stated that I have been going to meet people in person whom I first met in writing (as pen pals, etc.) since I was about 14 years old (I'm just slightly older than that now.) :D

I'm not an expert by any means and I have a busy life, so I'm not here as much as some people, but if I observe something about a situation that makes me raise my eyebrows... I'm always torn about telling the person I know and care about because I know they won't believe me.

Not too long ago someone was telling me about a person they had met on CC and was totally infatuated with. My friend told me that their sweetheart had never been married and did not have children-- or at least, that's what was claimed.

Well, I had observed that this particular person had been on CC under a couple different names, long before my friend had ever gotten there--and I could have been wrong, but their posting style, grammar, and style of joking was always the same, so I was about 99.9% sure that it was the same person, and so were my other CC friends at the time. I finally decided to tell my friend that this person they were telling me about had originally claimed to have been divorced and had X amount of kids under at least one of those usernames (I told my friend to ask that person about "-------" and "------", because I remembered the names of the kids they claimed to have had at that time.)

I have no idea which story about that person was true.

My friend was in shock, but in the end, chose to believe what this person was telling them, and stopped talking to me. (Neither of them are here right now, at least, not under names that I've noticed, which is why I'm telling this story.)

I don't know what happened, but last I knew, my friend did admit that this person often "disappeared" for no reason and with no explanation, and that their "relationship" was currently "on hold".

Proverbs 4: 23 -- "Above all else, guard your heart, because everything you do flows from it."

Please, be careful out there!
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
#59
P.S. In some of the biggest catfishing stories I have ever heard about here on CC, the catfish never once asked for money (that I know of, unless the victims were too embarrassed to admit to sending them money.)

Apparently, all they wanted was the personal interaction with people they were attracted to and the feeling that someone was in love with them--but it's just that they wanted this feeling from several different people, sometimes all at once, and they had no intentions of actually meeting in real life or carrying out an actual relationship.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,920
9,669
113
#60
Yeah I am taking their advice into consideration and I feel my heart's into this but, I'll stay vigilant of any "irregularities" I mean despite that she seems like the one for me I am analyzing her and she is analyzing me and I keep saying things like "I love you" to her because for all I know I do and she is real and who she says she is but, any "irregularities" like asking me to sign anything fast or send her big amounts like 200 and up then I'll be sure to insist upon what for and if it sounds fishy then I'll give her up.
Also I keep her to what she says like "being serious" "open and honest" and "not about money" just as I would expect her to do with me.
Also I know we haven't met face to face but, she has sent me pictures of herself fully clothed with real objects in the background like a bed and window and in each picture she has her phone in her hand taking the picture and her status on hangouts fading showing her actually taking the pictures instead of me having to just assume that her profile picture is really her I mean I know that still sounds pretty slim on this being true to some but, so far nothing quite you know like "outlandish" though she does seem to get real nervous like me, ever since we been talking about 3 to 4 days she has been concerned about not getting hurt and having a serious relationship.
She even told me personal stuff about herself without me asking just like I tend to here and on other sites like for example how her uncle became her legal guardian, father died in a car crash I think she's just real jittery a lot and doesn't much think out what to say because she's not too trusting.
Well, definitely stop telling her "I love you"..
 
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