Lives of Single Women in their 30's and 40's (statistics-based documentary on single women in today's society)

[zeroturbulence]

Lives of Single Women in their 30's and 40's (statistics-based documentary on single women in today's society)

I found this very interesting video produced by the popular Korean tv network Arirang.

Its only 5 minutes long but worth watching because it shows some potentially shocking statistics about how many more single women there are now compared to 10 years ago, and why that is.

 

[Gracie_14]

Oh my goodness...just watching this video is quite shocking when looking at the statistics. And these women choose to be single...

 

[PennEd]

Lives of Single Women in their 30's and 40's (statistics-based documentary on single women in today's society)

I found this very interesting video produced by the popular Korean tv network Arirang.

Its only 5 minutes long but worth watching because it shows some potentially shocking statistics about how many more single women there are now compared to 10 years ago, and why that is.

Here we see an almost universal truth. Women want to be taken care of, and if there is no husband, then they rely on Government. Look at the U.S. statistics on who single women vote for. Those that promise, but lie, to take care of them. Of course we know the bigger the government, the smaller the citizen, and the less freedom we have.

This is NOT good for the women, the men, and society at large.

 

[zeroturbulence]

Here we see an almost universal truth. Women want to be taken care of, and if there is no husband, then they rely on Government. Look at the U.S. statistics on who single women vote for. Those that promise, but lie, to take care of them. Of course we know the bigger the government, the smaller the citizen, and the less freedom we have.

This is NOT good for the women, the men, and society at large.

It's obvious that you didn't watch the video at all. The women are single because they are focused on their businesses and careers and don't have time to look for a husband.

 

[PennEd]

It's obvious that you didn't watch the video at all. The women are single because they are focused on their businesses and careers and don't have time to look for a husband.

I watched every last second of the video. The thrust of it is that these single women will have trouble in retirement, and seek government assistance, BECAUSE they focused on their career instead of marrying.

 

[zeroturbulence]

I watched every last second of the video. The thrust of it is that these single women will have trouble in retirement, and seek government assistance, BECAUSE they focused on their career instead of marrying.

I watched the first half then got distracted. Sorry.

Anyway, I just was interested in why there were so many women not marrying now. The implications of staying single wasn't on my radar.

 

[cinder]

Here we see an almost universal truth. Women want to be taken care of, and if there is no husband, then they rely on Government. Look at the U.S. statistics on who single women vote for. Those that promise, but lie, to take care of them. Of course we know the bigger the government, the smaller the citizen, and the less freedom we have.

This is NOT good for the women, the men, and society at large.

First off I'm not sure that your "universal truth" is a valid conclusion from the video. Some of the statistics they cited (like the fact that so many of the women were in lower income, less secure jobs) point more towards the issue that women want equal opportunity to be able to take care of themselves and their families as marrieds or men. They aren't necessarily looking for a handout as they are a fair chance to have their hard work meet their needs.

But even if we accept your premise that women want to be taken care of, what's your solution? As in a world of easy divorce it becomes harder and harder for anyone (not just women) to rely on a spouse to be there for them when the going gets tough and take care of them. Husbands just aren't considered nearly as reliable as they used to be. I don't know that government is a better option, but it seems to me the real problem is that the more selfish and individualistic people become, the less we can count on people to do what is right and helpful from any personal connection and so the more we want to codify it into law. And I agree that human relationships governed by law is not a good situation for society at large.

 

[PennEd]

First off I'm not sure that your "universal truth" is a valid conclusion from the video. Some of the statistics they cited (like the fact that so many of the women were in lower income, less secure jobs) point more towards the issue that women want equal opportunity to be able to take care of themselves and their families as marrieds or men. They aren't necessarily looking for a handout as they are a fair chance to have their hard work meet their needs.

But even if we accept your premise that women want to be taken care of, what's your solution? As in a world of easy divorce it becomes harder and harder for anyone (not just women) to rely on a spouse to be there for them when the going gets tough and take care of them. Husbands just aren't considered nearly as reliable as they used to be. I don't know that government is a better option, but it seems to me the real problem is that the more selfish and individualistic people become, the less we can count on people to do what is right and helpful from any personal connection and so the more we want to codify it into law. And I agree that human relationships governed by law is not a good situation for society at large.

The video is simply more evidence that women are looking for someone to care for them. I don't think I'm going out on any limb to say otherwise. Of course it doesn't apply to every woman.

Unmarried American women vote almost 75% for the socialist candidate, which is the Democrat. Why do you think they do that?

The idea that women don't have opportunities today is almost laughable. Spend some time with men under 35 and listen to how even with degrees, they have a hard time competing with the affirmative action and male bashing culture in the corporate world, and especially academic world, where a STAGGERING 56% of College students are women.

So the question remains, why do unmarried women, MANY, if not most, of whom are College educated, vote in such large numbers for candidates that promote government social programs? Whereas their married counterparts vote by more than half the other way?

You don't think there is something inherent in women looking to be cared for?

 

[1christian1]

Here we see an almost universal truth. Women want to be taken care of, and if there is no husband, then they rely on Government. Look at the U.S. statistics on who single women vote for. Those that promise, but lie, to take care of them. Of course we know the bigger the government, the smaller the citizen, and the less freedom we have.

This is NOT good for the women, the men, and society at large.

What I find really sad is corporations such as Walmart that rely on the government to provide health care
and food stamps to their employees... this Is a lot for the government to take on! We are talking about more than a million employees. That is mucho dinero my friend !!!

 

[CharliRenee]

This is very interesting topic. Imho, the number of single women doesn't substantiate the conclusion that the majority of them choose to be. As a fifty something, I understand the concern the need to prepare for old age. However, I definitely see that trend happening for both genders. If that is the case, I think it is wise option that folks choose platonic roommates to help cut down the outgoing costs. Pragmatics require preparation be applied single or married. I ponder these things myself. I think it is prudent that we all do, but not such that we fret about it. After all, if He cares for the sparrow...

 

[PennEd]

What I find really sad is corporations such as Walmart that rely on the government to provide health care
and food stamps to their employees... this Is a lot for the government to take on! We are talking about more than a million employees. That is mucho dinero my friend !!!

OMG!! This sounds serious! Quick. Give me a description of the gunmen responsible for forcing those people to work at Walmart and I'll call the proper authorities!!

 

[seoulsearch]

The video is simply more evidence that women are looking for someone to care for them. I don't think I'm going out on any limb to say otherwise. Of course it doesn't apply to every woman.

Unmarried American women vote almost 75% for the socialist candidate, which is the Democrat. Why do you think they do that?

The idea that women don't have opportunities today is almost laughable. Spend some time with men under 35 and listen to how even with degrees, they have a hard time competing with the affirmative action and male bashing culture in the corporate world, and especially academic world, where a STAGGERING 56% of College students are women.

So the question remains, why do unmarried women, MANY, if not most, of whom are College educated, vote in such large numbers for candidates that promote government social programs? Whereas their married counterparts vote by more than half the other way?

You don't think there is something inherent in women looking to be cared for?

Hi Ed,

You know I have a lot of respect for you, but as an individual single woman, I respectfully disagree with many of your points.

First of all, as an aside, I'm surprised that it wasn't reiterated that this video was based on South Korean culture but yet in this discussion, it is being compared (as far as I can tell) to the United States, which I don't think is a very parallel comparison because of all the different cultural norms, opportunities, and expectations between the two.

Ironically, I am a Korean woman who has lived in the US her entire life and was raised by white American parents. I (and the single women I know) do not expect to be taken care of, and when I voted during these past elections, I did not vote for people who promised easy handouts or the illusion of comfortable care.

I was raised by parents who told me that if I wanted something, I needed to get a job, and if that wouldn't pay for it, keep on adding jobs. They have raised me to be self-sufficient and to not expect anything from anyone, most especially the government, so I was raised to start working and planning from the time I was young.

Yet how many people reading this are, will be, or plan to be, dependent on Social Security someday? Does that count as part of your statement of "expecting to be cared for", if I am understanding the tone of your post correctly?

Would you then say that anyone who collects such a benefit as this is expecting to be cared for? If so, under your definition (and I am asking these things in order to make sure I understand it), are all Social Security recipients (married, widowed, etc., and not just those who are single women) looking for the government to take care of them? Again, I'm asking for the purpose of clarity, not criticism.

I am a single woman by choice (for now, at least) because I can relate to a few of the things portrayed in this video (even though again, it's based on South Korean culture and not my own home culture.) I work a lot and don't have extra time to socialize or leisurely attend events just hoping to meet someone. My family has gone through some things in recent times that were tough enough just for us-- so like one of the women in the video, I can't imagine having to balance the responsibilities of several other families (a husband and children, and then my husband's family) along with my own.

Most importantly to me, I'm single because even when I did peruse a few dating avenues, I either made great guy friends (but we weren't compatible romantically), or guys would tell me all THEIR wants ("I want a woman to watch my kids, help pay my bills, make it so that I'm never lonely again, have sex with me in such a way that it cures my porn addiction, and make me feel fantastically happy and loved every single minute of the day!") On the flip side, I'm sure men hear an endless list of "I wants" from the women they meet as well.

This, in my humble opinion, is the reason why many singles are staying single. Trying to keep up with the unrealistic demands of a Christian brother or sister who believes God "wants only the best for them, so here's a list of the very best that I want", is more than a little overwhelming. And, to be completely honest, it's quite a turnoff after you hear the same things over and over again for years without anyone ever asking you what you'd like in life.

The 2 main reasons why I've been single as long as I have and why, unless God changes that, I will chose to be single:

1. Over the past several years, God has connected me with a lot of other like-minded singles, and those friendships are a lot more fulfilling than crushing on someone who might be talking to 30 other people while telling you that you're the only one.

2. I stay single for the very reason that I know I CAN'T expect anyone to take care of me or help me achieve the goals I've set for myself after all these years.

One of the things I admire about Cinder is that she has traveled, volunteered, and lived independently in many different places and even countries. She hasn't asked or relied on anyone else to make those things happen--she worked her butt off and took those things on by herself, which is something I admire and hope to emulate someday. She is definitely not someone who is sitting around passively waiting for a white knight or Daddy Government to save her.

Contrast this with the fact that while most guys I talked to on dating sites told me all about what they wanted, but I can't think of a single one from those times who ever asked me what I want or hope for in life. I guess they figured that a "help-mate" means someone whose life dream is to serve someone else's every whim without ever asking her what her own dreams might be.

One of the things I've always thought about doing is volunteering at my original orphanage in Korea, which would take at least a 3-month commitment with both the cost of maintaining my living situation here (so that I wouldn't be homeless when I got back), and then enough to cover my costs while I was over there.

Who on earth would expect someone else to pay for them to do that? Certainly not me. And so, guess what I'm doing.

I work as much as I can, and live as responsibly and frugally as I am able to. I vote for people who will hopefully will give me the opportunities I need in order to earn my keep, meet my goals, and prayerfully reach those dreams that guys never seem to ask me about.

And I am certainly not putting this all on the guys, because I know plenty of women have made some of you guys out there feel like ATM's, which I am truly sorry for. Guys, we promise, not all women out there are like that! Don't give up!

But you can see how well I'd do in the midst of the dating scene/marriage hunt by telling guys (if they even asked me what my dreams are), "Actually... I'd like to go spend a few months in a foreign country with sick and disabled orphans..."

So instead of actively trying to pursue finding someone to marry, I decided to start trying to plan out how I could realistically pursue some of the things that have been on my heart for years instead.

Who knows what will happen? I will admit that secretly, I kind of hope that there might be someone else out there thinking the same way... Someone who is planning and saving and paying his own way too... And maybe somewhere along that path of steps that are lit by the guiding light of the Holy Spirit...

We might find ourselves planning and saving and dreaming... right on into each other's lives.

 

[Beatrice1234]

Lol

 

[tourist]

Hi Ed,

You know I have a lot of respect for you, but as an individual single woman, I respectfully disagree with many of your points.

First of all, as an aside, I'm surprised that it wasn't reiterated that this video was based on South Korean culture but yet in this discussion, it is being compared (as far as I can tell) to the United States, which I don't think is a very parallel comparison because of all the different cultural norms, opportunities, and expectations between the two.

Ironically, I am a Korean woman who has lived in the US her entire life and was raised by white American parents. I (and the single women I know) do not expect to be taken care of, and when I voted during these past elections, I did not vote for people who promised easy handouts or the illusion of comfortable care.

I was raised by parents who told me that if I wanted something, I needed to get a job, and if that wouldn't pay for it, keep on adding jobs. They have raised me to be self-sufficient and to not expect anything from anyone, most especially the government, so I was raised to start working and planning from the time I was young.

Yet how many people reading this are, will be, or plan to be, dependent on Social Security someday? Does that count as part of your statement of "expecting to be cared for", if I am understanding the tone of your post correctly?

Would you then say that anyone who collects such a benefit as this is expecting to be cared for? If so, under your definition (and I am asking these things in order to make sure I understand it), are all Social Security recipients (married, widowed, etc., and not just those who are single women) looking for the government to take care of them? Again, I'm asking for the purpose of clarity, not criticism.

I am a single woman by choice (for now, at least) because I can relate to a few of the things portrayed in this video (even though again, it's based on South Korean culture and not my own home culture.) I work a lot and don't have extra time to socialize or leisurely attend events just hoping to meet someone. My family has gone through some things in recent times that were tough enough just for us-- so like one of the women in the video, I can't imagine having to balance the responsibilities of several other families (a husband and children, and then my husband's family) along with my own.

Most importantly to me, I'm single because even when I did peruse a few dating avenues, I either made great guy friends (but we weren't compatible romantically), or guys would tell me all THEIR wants ("I want a woman to watch my kids, help pay my bills, make it so that I'm never lonely again, have sex with me in such a way that it cures my porn addiction, and make me feel fantastically happy and loved every single minute of the day!") On the flip side, I'm sure men hear an endless list of "I wants" from the women they meet as well.

This, in my humble opinion, is the reason why many singles are staying single. Trying to keep up with the unrealistic demands of a Christian brother or sister who believes God "wants only the best for them, so here's a list of the very best that I want", is more than a little overwhelming. And, to be completely honest, it's quite a turnoff after you hear the same things over and over again for years without anyone ever asking you what you'd like in life.

The 2 main reasons why I've been single as long as I have and why, unless God changes that, I will chose to be single:

1. Over the past several years, God has connected me with a lot of other like-minded singles, and those friendships are a lot more fulfilling than crushing on someone who might be talking to 30 other people while telling you that you're the only one.

2. I stay single for the very reason that I know I CAN'T expect anyone to take care of me or help me achieve the goals I've set for myself after all these years.

One of the things I admire about Cinder is that she has traveled, volunteered, and lived independently in many different places and even countries. She hasn't asked or relied on anyone else to make those things happen--she worked her butt off and took those things on by herself, which is something I admire and hope to emulate someday. She is definitely not someone who is sitting around passively waiting for a white knight or Daddy Government to save her.

Contrast this with the fact that while most guys I talked to on dating sites told me all about what they wanted, but I can't think of a single one from those times who ever asked me what I want or hope for in life. I guess they figured that a "help-mate" means someone whose life dream is to serve someone else's every whim without ever asking her what her own dreams might be.

One of the things I've always thought about doing is volunteering at my original orphanage in Korea, which would take at least a 3-month commitment with both the cost of maintaining my living situation here (so that I wouldn't be homeless when I got back), and then enough to cover my costs while I was over there.

Who on earth would expect someone else to pay for them to do that? Certainly not me. And so, guess what I'm doing.

I work as much as I can, and live as responsibly and frugally as I am able to. I vote for people who will hopefully will give me the opportunities I need in order to earn my keep, meet my goals, and prayerfully reach those dreams that guys never seem to ask me about.

And I am certainly not putting this all on the guys, because I know plenty of women have made some of you guys out there feel like ATM's, which I am truly sorry for. Guys, we promise, not all women out there are like that! Don't give up!

But you can see how well I'd do in the midst of the dating scene/marriage hunt by telling guys (if they even asked me what my dreams are), "Actually... I'd like to go spend a few months in a foreign country with sick and disabled orphans..."

So instead of actively trying to pursue finding someone to marry, I decided to start trying to plan out how I could realistically pursue some of the things that have been on my heart for years instead.

Who knows what will happen? I will admit that secretly, I kind of hope that there might be someone else out there thinking the same way... Someone who is planning and saving and paying his own way too... And maybe somewhere along that path of steps that are lit by the guiding light of the Holy Spirit...

We might find ourselves planning and saving and dreaming... right on into each other's lives.

I admire Cinder too and also greatly admire you as well. You are very much a voice of reason in the forums. The last line of your post is profound.

 

[tourist]

This is very interesting topic. Imho, the number of single women doesn't substantiate the conclusion that the majority of them choose to be. As a fifty something, I understand the concern the need to prepare for old age. However, I definitely see that trend happening for both genders. If that is the case, I think it is wise option that folks choose platonic roommates to help cut down the outgoing costs. Pragmatics require preparation be applied single or married. I ponder these things myself. I think it is prudent that we all do, but not such that we fret about it. After all, if He cares for the sparrow...

...and not a single one that falls from the sky that He is not aware of. Consider the lilies of the field too...

 

[1christian1]

OMG!! This sounds serious! Quick. Give me a description of the gunmen responsible for forcing those people to work at Walmart and I'll call the proper authorities!!

I was just addressing the comment about you saying how" Single women,"divorced, Needy, or what ever . the point you were trying to make that Big Businesses Take advantage of our government way more than these "so called women that can't survive without a man" ( Really!) According to you!!! that is what I was addressing... So you're good with big businesses taken advantage of their employees as well as the Government ???

 

[PennEd]

Hi Ed,

You know I have a lot of respect for you, but as an individual single woman, I respectfully disagree with many of your points.

First of all, as an aside, I'm surprised that it wasn't reiterated that this video was based on South Korean culture but yet in this discussion, it is being compared (as far as I can tell) to the United States, which I don't think is a very parallel comparison because of all the different cultural norms, opportunities, and expectations between the two.

Ironically, I am a Korean woman who has lived in the US her entire life and was raised by white American parents. I (and the single women I know) do not expect to be taken care of, and when I voted during these past elections, I did not vote for people who promised easy handouts or the illusion of comfortable care.

I was raised by parents who told me that if I wanted something, I needed to get a job, and if that wouldn't pay for it, keep on adding jobs. They have raised me to be self-sufficient and to not expect anything from anyone, most especially the government, so I was raised to start working and planning from the time I was young.

Yet how many people reading this are, will be, or plan to be, dependent on Social Security someday? Does that count as part of your statement of "expecting to be cared for", if I am understanding the tone of your post correctly?

Would you then say that anyone who collects such a benefit as this is expecting to be cared for? If so, under your definition (and I am asking these things in order to make sure I understand it), are all Social Security recipients (married, widowed, etc., and not just those who are single women) looking for the government to take care of them? Again, I'm asking for the purpose of clarity, not criticism.

I am a single woman by choice (for now, at least) because I can relate to a few of the things portrayed in this video (even though again, it's based on South Korean culture and not my own home culture.) I work a lot and don't have extra time to socialize or leisurely attend events just hoping to meet someone. My family has gone through some things in recent times that were tough enough just for us-- so like one of the women in the video, I can't imagine having to balance the responsibilities of several other families (a husband and children, and then my husband's family) along with my own.

Most importantly to me, I'm single because even when I did peruse a few dating avenues, I either made great guy friends (but we weren't compatible romantically), or guys would tell me all THEIR wants ("I want a woman to watch my kids, help pay my bills, make it so that I'm never lonely again, have sex with me in such a way that it cures my porn addiction, and make me feel fantastically happy and loved every single minute of the day!") On the flip side, I'm sure men hear an endless list of "I wants" from the women they meet as well.

This, in my humble opinion, is the reason why many singles are staying single. Trying to keep up with the unrealistic demands of a Christian brother or sister who believes God "wants only the best for them, so here's a list of the very best that I want", is more than a little overwhelming. And, to be completely honest, it's quite a turnoff after you hear the same things over and over again for years without anyone ever asking you what you'd like in life.

The 2 main reasons why I've been single as long as I have and why, unless God changes that, I will chose to be single:

1. Over the past several years, God has connected me with a lot of other like-minded singles, and those friendships are a lot more fulfilling than crushing on someone who might be talking to 30 other people while telling you that you're the only one.

2. I stay single for the very reason that I know I CAN'T expect anyone to take care of me or help me achieve the goals I've set for myself after all these years.

One of the things I admire about Cinder is that she has traveled, volunteered, and lived independently in many different places and even countries. She hasn't asked or relied on anyone else to make those things happen--she worked her butt off and took those things on by herself, which is something I admire and hope to emulate someday. She is definitely not someone who is sitting around passively waiting for a white knight or Daddy Government to save her.

Contrast this with the fact that while most guys I talked to on dating sites told me all about what they wanted, but I can't think of a single one from those times who ever asked me what I want or hope for in life. I guess they figured that a "help-mate" means someone whose life dream is to serve someone else's every whim without ever asking her what her own dreams might be.

One of the things I've always thought about doing is volunteering at my original orphanage in Korea, which would take at least a 3-month commitment with both the cost of maintaining my living situation here (so that I wouldn't be homeless when I got back), and then enough to cover my costs while I was over there.

Who on earth would expect someone else to pay for them to do that? Certainly not me. And so, guess what I'm doing.

I work as much as I can, and live as responsibly and frugally as I am able to. I vote for people who will hopefully will give me the opportunities I need in order to earn my keep, meet my goals, and prayerfully reach those dreams that guys never seem to ask me about.

And I am certainly not putting this all on the guys, because I know plenty of women have made some of you guys out there feel like ATM's, which I am truly sorry for. Guys, we promise, not all women out there are like that! Don't give up!

But you can see how well I'd do in the midst of the dating scene/marriage hunt by telling guys (if they even asked me what my dreams are), "Actually... I'd like to go spend a few months in a foreign country with sick and disabled orphans..."

So instead of actively trying to pursue finding someone to marry, I decided to start trying to plan out how I could realistically pursue some of the things that have been on my heart for years instead.

Who knows what will happen? I will admit that secretly, I kind of hope that there might be someone else out there thinking the same way... Someone who is planning and saving and paying his own way too... And maybe somewhere along that path of steps that are lit by the guiding light of the Holy Spirit...

We might find ourselves planning and saving and dreaming... right on into each other's lives.

Aw man. I don't have time now for a proper response.

My post was in no way intended as a hit against women. And it certainly doesn't apply to every woman, as you rightly point out. On the contrary, I think society, the direction we're headed, is greatly detrimental for women.

It should not be seen as derogatory that women want to be cared for. We were initially designed to compliment each other. Why is our differences controversial? I understand that the women in Korea live in a different culture than American women, but the result is the same. The video piece didn't even mention single men, and again, the main thrust of the vid was that government intervention would be necessary to care for these women.


Want to say more but gotta split!

Be Blessed
Love
Ed

 

[tourist]

Lol

I do that a lot too in these serious threads.

 

[Mel85]

I haven’t watched the video yet but just interesting to read all the responses.

 

[zeroturbulence]

This was just supposed to show that more and more women are more concerned with running a business or excelling in their careers than about getting married.

That's what the first part of the video was about.

All this stuff about how single women won't be able to afford retirement in Korea would most likely apply to single men in Korea as well.