Struggling with how to respond to someone very self centered.

[dokimos]

I have a close one to my heart who unfortunately seems only to enjoy speaking of The Lord in the context of their own bible knowledge, accomplishments, gifts, immediate life experiences, etc. I feel strongly that either this individual uses The Lord as a cover for speaking about things that pertain to themselves, oblivious to the spiritual danger and how this can lead us away from humility and trust in Jesus - or is under demonic influence (this is separate from they themselves being demonic, I love this person).

To this person, I have been in bondage for years, constantly affirming them, their feelings and accomplishments. This was when I was not as well-versed in the matters of the spiritual. This was an honest mistake. It turns out, some of what we do that seems uncontrollable CAN come from having demonic influence. Not always, of course, we have our own responsibility to stand guard against sinfulness, but I truly believe this person has a demon that causes them, during conversation, to incessantly speak - compulsively drawing conversations to center around themselves. It is to an abnormal degree. As much as I hate to admit this, I have reason to believe this might come from a generational curse, even.

Those in Christ have heard many prophets give words from the Spirit, that we are not to conduct ourselves in this way at all, as it is a spiritual danger and represents lousy witness to anyone with discernment. It makes having a conversation about JESUS CHRIST incredibly difficult, too. When He is treated only as an add-on or merely as an "energy", He is easily forgotten about. His works are not seen to us, because we are only recognizing our immediate, carnal reality.

There are other issues I have experienced with this person that has made a genuine relationship difficult, especially in discussing the matters of Jesus.

I am definitely in sin for noticing it and letting it bother me as much as it does, for judging. I am in sin for still, attempting to simply bear with it for the sake of peace. I am in sin for not telling this person. It is more comfortable for me to not tell them and to avoid the anger, the withdrawal of that person from my life potentially. I am fearing man more than GOD in this instance.

Part of me feels it is definitely The Spirit's job to convict this person - but if that is not so, I do not want to take the easy way out. The church this person and I attend is very centered around the doctrine of "Jesus paid it all". The more I grow in grace and the more the Holy Spirit reveals to me, the more the church I attend seems like a watered down social club that treats their elders as celebrities. It is 1 Cor. 15:1-4 gospel centered, but also VERY man centered, as much as it tries not to be, its actions speak louder than its words. There is much lenience on sin in the church, and I have seen Satan use it as a tramping ground. The person I am speaking of has grown up on the watered down grace doctrine their whole lives. Any attempt by me to correct this person would be met with rebuke with this backwards, watered down false doctrine of grace that leaves no room for growth and self examination to see if we are still in the faith.

For many Christians, it is about getting rid of those major sin areas (like lust, addiction, etc), celebrating that, and then wallowing in heart sin forever and ever, using twisted scripture as the basis for never growing as a disciple of Jesus. Selfishness, jealousy, carnal anxiety, focus on worldly matters, partiality, unforgiveness, etc. When the bible preaches against specific heart sin, the immature Christian almost never sees how it applies to them.

Please pray that The Lord would give me discernment and strength to respond to this person in a Spirit-led way - and when it is appropriate to disregard them for my own spiritual health and growth in Jesus. I feel that this person is not the only one in sin, to be clear.

Thank you for reading this far if you have. I do not like to celebrate Christmas, but I pray for everyone who is celebrating that Jesus Christ will be with you, giving you His peace that surpasses all understanding, that in Him you are not feeling alone, for those without a family this season. May you find joy, rest and comfort in Him and all that He is and offers us.

 

[CharliRenee]

This is very edifying. It causes the reader to examine their own hearts and minds. Dying to self is not easy but it is necessary. I pray He guides you in this as it sounds like a challenge for sure. I also pray that all who read this thread take a look and examine our hearts in Him.

I think these words were especially powerful.


For many Christians, it is about getting rid of those major sin areas (like lust, addiction, etc), celebrating that, and then wallowing in heart sin forever and ever, using twisted scripture as the basis for never growing as a disciple of Jesus. Selfishness, jealousy, carnal anxiety, focus on worldly matters, partiality, unforgiveness, etc. When the bible preaches against specific heart sin, the immature Christian almost never sees how it applies to them.

I believe maybe He is using you to Help this person. I think it has the potential to help all who read this and I pray it also edified you as we are all in a season of sanctification.

 

[Hevosmies]

Sounds like another day in the charismatic church.

Business as usual.

I've dealt with that too. But people in this state rarely care what the Scriptures say, so its pointless to bother quoting scriptures. I am helpless.

What I do is I just listen and nod, try to get the monologue to end sooner rather than later and keep it moving.

 

[Nehemiah6]

I am in sin for not telling this person. It is more comfortable for me to not tell them and to avoid the anger, the withdrawal of that person from my life potentially. I am fearing man more than GOD in this instance.

Now that you know exactly what the problem is, you have to make a hard decision. To tell this person (privately) exactly what you have observed, and why it does not conform to the character of Christ and Christians.

You will have to use * great plainness of speech* and let the chips fall where they may. You can also show this person this passage:

Who, [Christ] being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:
But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. (Phil 2:6-8)

 

[dokimos]

This is very edifying. It causes the reader to examine their own hearts and minds. Dying to self is not easy but it is necessary. I pray He guides you in this as it sounds like a challenge for sure. I also pray that all who read this thread take a look and examine our hearts in Him.

I think these words were especially powerful.


For many Christians, it is about getting rid of those major sin areas (like lust, addiction, etc), celebrating that, and then wallowing in heart sin forever and ever, using twisted scripture as the basis for never growing as a disciple of Jesus. Selfishness, jealousy, carnal anxiety, focus on worldly matters, partiality, unforgiveness, etc. When the bible preaches against specific heart sin, the immature Christian almost never sees how it applies to them.

I believe maybe He is using you to Help this person. I think it has the potential to help all who read this and I pray it also edified you as we are all in a season of sanctification.

It is only by God's POWER that we feel edified from similar messages and not convicted, followed by anger.

I don't think it will go well, if I try to be the main conduit for the aid of this person. I do not feel personally sinned against by this person, so even by going to them directly one on one to tell them what they are doing, it will look like an attack, especially due to being so tolerant of their behavior in the past.

I am related to this person, and we also have a relative who behaves in the same way, though their behavior is worse even, due to not having anything to do with Christ, even opposing Christ. It is a generational curse, as we all have a preceding relative who was very self-centered. I also have reason to believe there is generational witchcraft/occult practice as well as strong roots in pharmakeia.

Thank you for your time taken to respond, and thank you for your prayers!

 

[dokimos]

Sounds like another day in the charismatic church.

Business as usual.

I've dealt with that too. But people in this state rarely care what the Scriptures say, so its pointless to bother quoting scriptures. I am helpless.

What I do is I just listen and nod, try to get the monologue to end sooner rather than later and keep it moving.

So, you are saying it is okay for me to not speak against this person's sin myself, to let God do His work in revealing these sin areas?

Yes, it is in my opinion a Charismatic Evangelical church. I looked up the meaning of Charismatic Christian Church, and it actually sounds like they are based in the miracles and activity of the Holy Spirit. Like gifts of the Holy Spirit and everything.

Are you a cessationist by any chance?

I think the problem lies more in it being an evangelical church than a charismatic church. The reason being that evangelical churches are almost always "starter" churches for those not ready for meat, only able to stomach milk. These churches function by their name: EVANGELICAL. They are there to evangelize. When you are grafted in to the body of Christ, you eventually will grow out of the evangelical church.

Therefore, leaving the discussion of the elementary principles of Christ, let us go on to [a]perfection, not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works and of faith toward God, 2 of the doctrine of baptisms, of laying on of hands, of resurrection of the dead, and of eternal judgment. 3 And this [b]we will do if God permits. [HEBREWS 6]

These churches *never* progress. If you spiritually grow and try *at all* to bring to light spiritual dangers like Yoga, New Age, etc. make no mistake, you *will* get attacked by those who are spiritually immature.

 

[tourist]

I can't see how you have possibly sinned for noticing someone's disturbing behavior and that it bothers you. You might want to consider finding a new church home that is centered on the truth as presented in scripture and not a church where the main focus seems to be the members accomplishments. I will pray for God to give you discernment but based on your post I would say that you already have this type of gift.

 

[dokimos]

Now that you know exactly what the problem is, you have to make a hard decision. To tell this person (privately) exactly what you have observed, and why it does not conform to the character of Christ and Christians.

You will have to use * great plainness of speech* and let the chips fall where they may. You can also show this person this passage:
Who, [Christ] being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:
But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. (Phil 2:6-8)

I had the perfect chance to do this recently, but glory to God, an issue was resolved by prayer, forgiveness and not counting transgression. If an issue that pertains to this arises again, I will have to stop lying to this person and be plain, as you put it. I have to be so careful to do it in love, because this person is sensitive and will not handle it well and may even unknowingly retaliate without realization of what they are doing. God bless you, thanks for the scripture, it will not only be valuable to them, but it is valuable to me as well.

 

[CharliRenee]

It is only by God's POWER that we feel edified from similar messages and not convicted, followed by anger.

I don't think it will go well, if I try to be the main conduit for the aid of this person. I do not feel personally sinned against by this person, so even by going to them directly one on one to tell them what they are doing, it will look like an attack, especially due to being so tolerant of their behavior in the past.

I am related to this person, and we also have a relative who behaves in the same way, though their behavior is worse even, due to not having anything to do with Christ, even opposing Christ. It is a generational curse, as we all have a preceding relative who was very self-centered. I also have reason to believe there is generational witchcraft/occult practice as well as strong roots in pharmakeia.

Thank you for your time taken to respond, and thank you for your prayers!

I was reading one of your links on generational curses, something I know little of. I think what Nehemiah said was a good point. I think it will be good to be very clear, but honestly I can not imagine how one would do that. I think self centeredness is a force we all struggle with. I think He is our hope to grow. Praise His Holy Name.

 

[Solemateleft]

I have a close one to my heart who unfortunately seems only to enjoy speaking of The Lord in the context of their own bible knowledge, accomplishments, gifts, immediate life experiences, etc. I feel strongly that either this individual uses The Lord as a cover for speaking about things that pertain to themselves, oblivious to the spiritual danger and how this can lead us away from humility and trust in Jesus - or is under demonic influence (this is separate from they themselves being demonic, I love this person).

To this person, I have been in bondage for years, constantly affirming them, their feelings and accomplishments. This was when I was not as well-versed in the matters of the spiritual. This was an honest mistake. It turns out, some of what we do that seems uncontrollable CAN come from having demonic influence. Not always, of course, we have our own responsibility to stand guard against sinfulness, but I truly believe this person has a demon that causes them, during conversation, to incessantly speak - compulsively drawing conversations to center around themselves. It is to an abnormal degree. As much as I hate to admit this, I have reason to believe this might come from a generational curse, even.

Those in Christ have heard many prophets give words from the Spirit, that we are not to conduct ourselves in this way at all, as it is a spiritual danger and represents lousy witness to anyone with discernment. It makes having a conversation about JESUS CHRIST incredibly difficult, too. When He is treated only as an add-on or merely as an "energy", He is easily forgotten about. His works are not seen to us, because we are only recognizing our immediate, carnal reality.

There are other issues I have experienced with this person that has made a genuine relationship difficult, especially in discussing the matters of Jesus.

I am definitely in sin for noticing it and letting it bother me as much as it does, for judging. I am in sin for still, attempting to simply bear with it for the sake of peace. I am in sin for not telling this person. It is more comfortable for me to not tell them and to avoid the anger, the withdrawal of that person from my life potentially. I am fearing man more than GOD in this instance.

Part of me feels it is definitely The Spirit's job to convict this person - but if that is not so, I do not want to take the easy way out. The church this person and I attend is very centered around the doctrine of "Jesus paid it all". The more I grow in grace and the more the Holy Spirit reveals to me, the more the church I attend seems like a watered down social club that treats their elders as celebrities. It is 1 Cor. 15:1-4 gospel centered, but also VERY man centered, as much as it tries not to be, its actions speak louder than its words. There is much lenience on sin in the church, and I have seen Satan use it as a tramping ground. The person I am speaking of has grown up on the watered down grace doctrine their whole lives. Any attempt by me to correct this person would be met with rebuke with this backwards, watered down false doctrine of grace that leaves no room for growth and self examination to see if we are still in the faith.

For many Christians, it is about getting rid of those major sin areas (like lust, addiction, etc), celebrating that, and then wallowing in heart sin forever and ever, using twisted scripture as the basis for never growing as a disciple of Jesus. Selfishness, jealousy, carnal anxiety, focus on worldly matters, partiality, unforgiveness, etc. When the bible preaches against specific heart sin, the immature Christian almost never sees how it applies to them.

Please pray that The Lord would give me discernment and strength to respond to this person in a Spirit-led way - and when it is appropriate to disregard them for my own spiritual health and growth in Jesus. I feel that this person is not the only one in sin, to be clear.

Thank you for reading this far if you have. I do not like to celebrate Christmas, but I pray for everyone who is celebrating that Jesus Christ will be with you, giving you His peace that surpasses all understanding, that in Him you are not feeling alone, for those without a family this season. May you find joy, rest and comfort in Him and all that He is and offers us.

Greetings Dokimos and welcome to the CC Forum...
The descriptive characterization of this person would seem to be consistent with either personality disorder or potentially a mental health disorder. In either case, you might consider finding a clever way of luring this person to attend counseling with the hopes of identifying the underlying diagnosis in order to understand the most fruitful means of engaging this type of person and more importantly helping them along a path toward forward progress...
Unfortunately, there are many people with varying disorders (as you have described) that would not respond well to hearing this information from a family member or well-intended friend's perceived opinion of the problem... Unfortunately, this could potentially backfire and potentially place the existing relationship at risk...
If this is a relationship that you value and you are hopeful to salvage this relationship, there is simply too much uncertainty and risk involved without knowing the clinical diagnosis...
So in the meantime, a possible means of coping with the situation is to strive to keep your potentially honest but contentious comments to yourself for a brief moment, and consider rephrasing your concerns in the form of a question...
for example, just ask them: 'what would other people think?'
While it is likely that they frankly lack empathy/consideration for other people's feelings; but it is likely that they value their personal status and desire to maintain a positive reputation. ie if they believe something will hurt their reputation, they will think twice.
Good Luck and God Bless

 

[pottersclay]

I think the Lord has given you discernment. Now you want the Holy Spirit to do the dirty work.....lol. bring in the Lions and tigers and bears o my you have a spiritual matter.
Never let anyone take your peace away continuously to the point of anger and bitterness. Family or not.
Ego is not a gift of the spirit and now that you feed it what have you learned??????
I leave you this...
Better to be rebuked by a friend than kissed by the enemy.

 

[dokimos]

I can't see how you have possibly sinned for noticing someone's disturbing behavior and that it bothers you. You might want to consider finding a new church home that is centered on the truth as presented in scripture and not a church where the main focus seems to be the members accomplishments. I will pray for God to give you discernment but based on your post I would say that you already have this type of gift.

I think a lot of people could use James 4:11-12 on me for pointing out the sin of another and judging them in my heart. I do find it repugnant when this individual is incessant in driving conversations to themselves. That is where I am sinful. There is a genuine concern for them, absolutely. But there is also my flesh man, who is just "fed up" with it and unwilling to bear with it.

I have considered looking for a new church so many times. I have been so church hurt and upset with the political power structure in the church and the watered down doctrine, but God has used allllll of it to sanctify His own. The people most fed, already leaving or wanting to leave were either kicked out or had grown out of it.

The Lord has used the error and sin in the church to give me a fire for HIM, so amazing. That proves to me that He is alive and active, that I can be in a church like that, where it is so man centered and so worldly and feeling convictions to be godly, wanting to fight my sin. Yes, Almighty God can work in the most watered down churches. There is a real war, cause Satan is right there, too. But even in churches where Satan tramples on, God has the upper hand, and he is fighting for His own every day. If you are God's, that's it. Satan has no claim over you, even if you go to a subpar, dead church where it's about monthly activities and potlucks and they never preach repentance.

It is in quite a sad state, they hold people back by preaching a watered down message about trusting God through suffering, believing His promises, etc and never take a hard stance against anything spiritually dangerous. Put a lot of emphasis on "Jesus paid it all with his blood" which, if you never MOVE PAST THAT (hebrews 6) you risk becoming stagnant, even falling away. You feel comfortable in sin if that's all that's thrown at you. The church leadership's job is to make us feel UNCOMFORTABLE in sin and to shepherd us in handling matters in our life in a way that is obedient to God and His Word.

The way they keep people is glorifying man and their accomplishments, yes!! Thank you for saying that. At our Christmas Eve service (I do not celebrate Christmas, or try not to) there was a video played on the HUGE projector screens featuring members of the church giving very self-centered personal testimonies to help advertise their evangelism course. The whole thing read as more of a self-help course advertisement than anything related to Jesus. Jesus was not focused on, talked about or ANYTHING. One of the people featured in this video was an established member of the church who is under demonic oppression because of a specific thing that is rooted in spiritual (not of Christ) practices.

At the end of the service, the Pastors all dressed up in showman attire (top hat, canes) to sing a gospel rap and act silly. Seems harmless enough, right? The congregation ate it up, but to me, it was an alarming Freudian slip of sorts, an admission that "we do not take our calling seriously, we are showmen". It is frightening to me.

 

[dokimos]

Greetings Dokimos and welcome to the CC Forum...
The descriptive characterization of this person would seem to be consistent with either personality disorder or potentially a mental health disorder. In either case, you might consider finding a clever way of luring this person to attend counseling with the hopes of identifying the underlying diagnosis in order to understand the most fruitful means of engaging this type of person and more importantly helping them along a path toward forward progress...
Unfortunately, there are many people with varying disorders (as you have described) that would not respond well to hearing this information from a family member or well-intended friend's perceived opinion of the problem... Unfortunately, this could potentially backfire and potentially place the existing relationship at risk...
If this is a relationship that you value and you are hopeful to salvage this relationship, there is simply too much uncertainty and risk involved without knowing the clinical diagnosis...
So in the meantime, a possible means of coping with the situation is to strive to keep your potentially honest but contentious comments to yourself for a brief moment, and consider rephrasing your concerns in the form of a question...
for example, just ask them: 'what would other people think?'
While it is likely that they frankly lack empathy/consideration for other people's feelings; but it is likely that they value their personal status and desire to maintain a positive reputation. ie if they believe something will hurt their reputation, they will think twice.
Good Luck and God Bless

Hello,
I had another CC member say exactly what you have just said here, regarding personality disorders, on another thread I have made seeking counsel regarding this individual.

Again, I do not want to confirm, nor do I feel I have the right to point to a personality disorder.

For the sake of uncovering spiritual truths, I will come out and say that the person I speak of is my sibling. We share a mother. We are half siblings, sharing another half sibling. There is me, I am the youngest - a middle sibling (antichrist spirit) and the one I speak of is the eldest and has been a believer for 18 years, if I recall correctly. We are not in contact with the middle sibling because they are extremely verbally abusive to both of us. The sibling I speak of in the original post has accused me of being personality disordered and then took it back later on, funny enough. Each one of us has accused the other of being personality disordered.

We can't all three of us be personality disordered, we did not grow up together and our mother did not raise us. This is why I believe there is a GENERATIONAL CURSE which involves demonic activity in some areas.

I think we can attribute some mental illnesses, physical illnesses and yes, even personality disorders to demonic influence, curses and generational curses! There is a strong self-focus spirit, spirit of pride and possibly even witchcraft/occult laying on my bloodline.

 

[dokimos]

I was reading one of your links on generational curses, something I know little of. I think what Nehemiah said was a good point. I think it will be good to be very clear, but honestly I can not imagine how one would do that. I think self centeredness is a force we all struggle with. I think He is our hope to grow. Praise His Holy Name.

Christ is always our hope. I think the message to be gained from this is that we must worry about ourselves and our own growth in Him. We have enough to worry about regarding the state of our own salvation without being overly concerned with the sin of others. I will need to be more diligent in praying for this person's growth. I think the temptation is to make someone aware of the severity of their own sin rather than trusting God with them and keeping them in prayer.

However, we can't let that be a cover for never having to talk about these uncomfortable things when the Lord reveals the correct opportunity to us.

Self centeredness IS one of the root causes of our sin. That, and pride - but sometimes, it is to a RIDICULOUS degree that someone is self centered. And what is one to do when they want to see their loved ones delivered of that? I am not them. I cannot make them do what is honoring to God. God has given them free will. I can only pray.

 

[dokimos]

I think the Lord has given you discernment. Now you want the Holy Spirit to do the dirty work.....lol. bring in the Lions and tigers and bears o my you have a spiritual matter.
Never let anyone take your peace away continuously to the point of anger and bitterness. Family or not.
Ego is not a gift of the spirit and now that you feed it what have you learned??????
I leave you this...
Better to be rebuked by a friend than kissed by the enemy.

It has left me bitter, you are right. Bitterness is NOT of God.

I have no recourse except to pray. I keep putting it off lately. I need to stop this. I should have prayed about this instead of seeking out the counsel of man. But I appreciate you all so much and have enjoyed discussion with you.

 

[Solemateleft]

Hello,
I had another CC member say exactly what you have just said here, regarding personality disorders, on another thread I have made seeking counsel regarding this individual.

Again, I do not want to confirm, nor do I feel I have the right to point to a personality disorder.

For the sake of uncovering spiritual truths, I will come out and say that the person I speak of is my sibling. We share a mother. We are half siblings, sharing another half sibling. There is me, I am the youngest - a middle sibling (antichrist spirit) and the one I speak of is the eldest and has been a believer for 18 years, if I recall correctly. We are not in contact with the middle sibling because they are extremely verbally abusive to both of us. The sibling I speak of in the original post has accused me of being personality disordered and then took it back later on, funny enough. Each one of us has accused the other of being personality disordered.

We can't all three of us be personality disordered, we did not grow up together and our mother did not raise us. This is why I believe there is a GENERATIONAL CURSE which involves demonic activity in some areas.

I think we can attribute some mental illnesses, physical illnesses and yes, even personality disorders to demonic influence, curses and generational curses! There is a strong self-focus spirit, spirit of pride and possibly even witchcraft/occult laying on my bloodline.

praying for you and your family...

 

[JaumeJ]

Our only witness possible is of Jesus Christ and what He has done for each of us, but it is quite possible for a person to be unspiritually overboard. Remember the girl with the demon who followed the apostle for a few days say "these are teh men of the most High God, or the like until finally, Paul I believe, turned to her and cast out a demon, after which she was no longer able to earn money for her family by her demonically influenced soothsaying.

 

[Hepzibah]

@dokimos

I do not go along with the current belief that personality disorders are from upbringing. I believe that inheritance is the biggest factor in a full blown disorders but traits can be picked up by example.

The strongest trait is the lack of conscience and the best way to learn how to deal with theses people is education about cluster B personalities. Suffering at their hands has been the biggest influence in my spiritual growth and development of wisdom.

 

[Lanolin]

Not sure I quite understand, but could be something to do with a religious spirit operating under the guise of Jezebel, who latches on to someone whos passive like Ahab. Then it becomes a stronghold. If you know the story of Jezebel it will give you some insight into whats behind it (baal worship)
Jesus says once you know the truth the truth will set you free.

Dealing with disorders like borderline or narcissm...Wisdom from the Bible says you dont pick grapes of thistles or gather figs from thorns...you can tell a tree by its fruit. If you cant keep away or a distance you need to at least become detached, its like if you are near an alcoholic or any addictive personality its best not to feed it.
Some people call it toxic or emotional vampires that too sounds a warning dont get sucked into other peoples dramas. Sometimes its best not to respond at all!

Yes you can pray but might be helpful to know some demon routing prayers or combat scriptures...look in psalms when David was surrounded by the enemy...he was being chased by Saul who had an evil spirit and was out to destroy David becuase he was jealous..and also self centred. Also recall that Saul consulted the witch of endor something he shouldnt have done, messing with the occult has consequences.

Or when elijah was confronting Jezebel. It seems like you a bit afraid of confrontation because of this persons feelings may get hurt...well this is the narcissitic rage that comes out, you cant walk on eggshells all the time, thats no way to live. God is on your side and more powerful than someone elses tantrum. HE will defend you just keep up your shield of faith. There are tens of thousands of angels on Gods side though you cannot see. So dont fear. If you a believer, youve been adopted into Christ family, the curse has been broken by the blood of Jesus so whatever generation curse it was will not fall on you..it has passed over just like the angel of death passes over all those who put the blood of the lamb on their doorposts.

 

[Hevosmies]

So, you are saying it is okay for me to not speak against this person's sin myself, to let God do His work in revealing these sin areas?

Yes, it is in my opinion a Charismatic Evangelical church. I looked up the meaning of Charismatic Christian Church, and it actually sounds like they are based in the miracles and activity of the Holy Spirit. Like gifts of the Holy Spirit and everything.

Are you a cessationist by any chance?

I think the problem lies more in it being an evangelical church than a charismatic church. The reason being that evangelical churches are almost always "starter" churches for those not ready for meat, only able to stomach milk. These churches function by their name: EVANGELICAL. They are there to evangelize. When you are grafted in to the body of Christ, you eventually will grow out of the evangelical church.

Therefore, leaving the discussion of the elementary principles of Christ, let us go on to [a]perfection, not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works and of faith toward God, 2 of the doctrine of baptisms, of laying on of hands, of resurrection of the dead, and of eternal judgment. 3 And this [b]we will do if God permits. [HEBREWS 6]

These churches *never* progress. If you spiritually grow and try *at all* to bring to light spiritual dangers like Yoga, New Age, etc. make no mistake, you *will* get attacked by those who are spiritually immature.

Hi!

To the surprise of many im not a cessationist! I just try to have discernment on when the gifts being used are real, or just carnal boasting phonys.

You can say something about it, no doubt, but if it has no effect, then "let them be".

I have never went to "evangelical" churches, atleast something called like that, so I cant say. But if a church approves of yoga and the other things you mentioned for example, then its DEFINATELY a very wicked church full of compromise with the world. Flee from that.
You are also correct that some churches are on milk level forever, but its also due to them getting new members (thank God) so the same things need to be repeated.

If I was the protestant pope I would have it organized that we have our own RCIA program, not for JOINING the church like the catholics do, but a teaching series where those who recently joined the church are given the BASICS of the faith. This would save them from a lot of trouble.