Judgemental Christians

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MegMarch

Guest
#61
Thank you all so much for your replies. I have considered what everyone has said, and I am grateful to receive such encouragement!
 
May 25, 2015
6,119
821
113
#62
Congratulations! 🎉 👏

I’m right now, kinda, writing a book (figuring it out haha). Also I am growing in... becoming an artist. Learning the guitar and writing songs that come to me (and singing). I was recently (and still am) working with a music company and basically doing design work for him (made him a logo) and social media related things (came up with social media postings and art with weekly messages).

He teaches people instruments, but now is venturing off into also teaching people about masterminds (teaching your personal specialties/story to people who want to hear it at a price in an online setting or seminar setting).

It’s been interesting, seeing God’s faithfulness and providence.
Woah, that's awesome! What's the book about? :)

And I am also learning the guitar! I've been playing the piano since I was a young girl and wanted to broaden. How are you learning? Is it through the music company?
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,834
981
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#64
Woah, that's awesome! What's the book about? :)

And I am also learning the guitar! I've been playing the piano since I was a young girl and wanted to broaden. How are you learning? Is it through the music company?
I still haven’t learned a whole song. I can’t seem to find a song I want to learn. The hardest step for me in my progress with the guitar is actually finding a song I actually want to learn and sing. That and barre chords, haha. 😆

So, what I have done is learn some basic open chords and made my own songs through finger picking with my own lyrics.

I think it would be neat to learn a little piano for some songs, but right now I am focusing on the guitar. I did get an introduction to the guitar from a worship leader, who showed me the basics of the guitar and gave me a chord chart.

He taught me about playing by ear instead of just knowing “up down up up down” for strumming patterns. He played something and then wanted to see if I could replicate it. I did! You hear the sound and mimic it. Not to say you shouldn’t look at strumming or picking patterns and learn that way as well. I know for a song I was looking at, it helped to see the pattern to be able to play the exact song. I didn’t learn the whole song though in terms of singing and playing the whole song, but I did learn the instrumental side of it.

The importance of what he was showing me was rhythm (and eventually time signatures for playing with bands) and keeping on beat.

PS: The book is about the Christian walk, and how to have a solid foundation. Almost like a discipleship book.
 
Jun 15, 2020
22
11
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Grand terrace, California
#65
I’ve been a Christian now for about 7 years, and I’m finally encountering what I will call the wall of judgement from my Christian friends. It is not only in the area of dating, although this seems to be the topic that they care about the the most, but also in other areas like how often I read my Bible, or if I am serving others enough, or if I endure trials with joy because that is godly.

But I will focus on the area of dating. It is disheartening to me, and I don’t feel like I can date unless it is according to their standards. To clarify, we all agree on the Biblical stance regarding fornication. I’m referring to all the additional expectations they have.

For example:
-Online dating isn’t good.
-Don’t spend too much time taking to the other person because that means they are becoming your god.
-They aren’t good enough because they aren’t a “strong” Christian.
-Wait a certain amount of time between dating people.

My main question is this-how do you all deal with the way other Christians pressurize the dating environment?
I believe that we do have to focus on God and let him lead the way even though it’s very hard. He will supply all your needs with his riches and glory and also we just have to trust God and because he set us free from sin and shed his grace on us. He loves us soo much but we are not slaves but by the Holy Spirit that he gave us, he will direct all our ways into making the right decisions for life.
 
Jun 15, 2020
22
11
3
37
Grand terrace, California
#66
I’ve been a Christian now for about 7 years, and I’m finally encountering what I will call the wall of judgement from my Christian friends. It is not only in the area of dating, although this seems to be the topic that they care about the the most, but also in other areas like how often I read my Bible, or if I am serving others enough, or if I endure trials with joy because that is godly.

But I will focus on the area of dating. It is disheartening to me, and I don’t feel like I can date unless it is according to their standards. To clarify, we all agree on the Biblical stance regarding fornication. I’m referring to all the additional expectations they have.

For example:
-Online dating isn’t good.
-Don’t spend too much time taking to the other person because that means they are becoming your god.
-They aren’t good enough because they aren’t a “strong” Christian.
-Wait a certain amount of time between dating people.

My main question is this-how do you all deal with the way other Christians pressurize the dating environment?
Oh by the way my name is Daniel.
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,574
4,262
113
#68
Woah, that's awesome! What's the book about? :)

And I am also learning the guitar! I've been playing the piano since I was a young girl and wanted to broaden. How are you learning? Is it through the music company?
I still haven’t learned a whole song. I can’t seem to find a song I want to learn. The hardest step for me in my progress with the guitar is actually finding a song I actually want to learn and sing. That and barre chords, haha. 😆

So, what I have done is learn some basic open chords and made my own songs through finger picking with my own lyrics.

I think it would be neat to learn a little piano for some songs, but right now I am focusing on the guitar. I did get an introduction to the guitar from a worship leader, who showed me the basics of the guitar and gave me a chord chart.

He taught me about playing by ear instead of just knowing “up down up up down” for strumming patterns. He played something and then wanted to see if I could replicate it. I did! You hear the sound and mimic it. Not to say you shouldn’t look at strumming or picking patterns and learn that way as well. I know for a song I was looking at, it helped to see the pattern to be able to play the exact song. I didn’t learn the whole song though in terms of singing and playing the whole song, but I did learn the instrumental side of it.

The importance of what he was showing me was rhythm (and eventually time signatures for playing with bands) and keeping on beat.

PS: The book is about the Christian walk, and how to have a solid foundation. Almost like a discipleship book.
I just started learning guitar too :D
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,574
4,262
113
#73
How far have you come? I’ve heard it’s best to learn the key of G first and all the open chords.
I just started about a week ago and haven't put much time into it. I learned 4 chords so far but that's it. E minor, C, D and i think G (can't remember now).
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,834
981
113
33
#74
I just started about a week ago and haven't put much time into it. I learned 4 chords so far but that's it. E minor, C, D and i think G (can't remember now).
Hey, that’s basically where I am at except I can switch between the chords in a fairly smooth manner. Remember that you have to let muscle memory kick in. Don’t get annoyed, just keep switching between those chords or find songs with those chords and keep repeating the process. Eventually, one day, you’ll be surprised at how you easily switch between them. The key to this is repetition. Repetition of correct techniques, as my teacher friend says, leads to mastery.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,571
1,293
113
#76
I’ve been a Christian now for about 7 years, and I’m finally encountering what I will call the wall of judgement from my Christian friends. It is not only in the area of dating, although this seems to be the topic that they care about the the most, but also in other areas like how often I read my Bible, or if I am serving others enough, or if I endure trials with joy because that is godly.

But I will focus on the area of dating. It is disheartening to me, and I don’t feel like I can date unless it is according to their standards. To clarify, we all agree on the Biblical stance regarding fornication. I’m referring to all the additional expectations they have.

For example:
-Online dating isn’t good.
-Don’t spend too much time taking to the other person because that means they are becoming your god.
-They aren’t good enough because they aren’t a “strong” Christian.
-Wait a certain amount of time between dating people.

My main question is this-how do you all deal with the way other Christians pressurize the dating environment?
Hey Sis
It's good to see a post from you💕
What is standing out most of all to me is that there seems to be heavy-shepherding, legalism and control. If it was me, I would get away from these people and fast. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, it only matters what God thinks...
I could understand people trying to warn you about dating sites because the care, but this really does sound controlling, and I have to say, they don't sound like mature, Spirit led believers.
Lots of love 💕🦋xx
 
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MegMarch

Guest
#77
Hey Sis
It's good to see a post from you💕
What is standing out most of all to me is that there seems to be heavy-shepherding, legalism and control. If it was me, I would get away from these people and fast. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, it only matters what God thinks...
I could understand people trying to warn you about dating sites because the care, but this really does sound controlling, and I have to say, they don't sound like mature, Spirit led believers.
Lots of love 💕🦋xx
Thank you so much for your response, sis! I am purposefully giving myself some space from these friends at this time in order to focus on forgiveness. I agree with you, and I am not going to let them determine my steps. Instead, I have sought the Lord in directing my steps. And it’s so good to hear from you too! I’ve missed seeing your posts. ❤️
 

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
Jul 18, 2017
24,167
12,764
113
#78
-Online dating isn’t good. SOUND ADVICE. TOO MANY PREDATORS.

-Don’t spend too much time talking to the other person because that means they are becoming your god. TOO MUCH TALKING IS NOT GOOD AT ANY TIME. SEE PROVERBS.

-They aren’t good enough because they aren’t a “strong” Christian. "GOOD ENOUGH" AS A POTENTIAL SPOUSE? SOUND ADVICE.

-Wait a certain amount of time between dating people. NOT A BAD IDEA.

Looks like most of this is good advice or common sense.