I need him to...

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Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,489
13,797
113
#21
I need her to be who God designed her to be.

(It's only partly a Jesus juke... because she already is)
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#22
huh I dont think I can play this game simple sheep...!

might be asking too much...
 
Jan 5, 2022
1,224
620
113
37
"A higher plane," hehe
www.youtube.com
#23
I need him to pull the toilet tissue from the front and NOT the back, if he wants peace😂!
That's actually the correct way to put the toilet paper, overhanging the front. Professional hotels do it this way. Don't make people have to root around up in there where dirty hands have been to find the end of the roll! o_O

I honestly don't know what I would need from a wife. I mean, I'm surviving, so technically nothing, right? But something is seriously missing in my life.

I guess my answer would be companionship and someone I can trust.
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
#24
I would need her to...

Do basic math! Just because you still have checks doesn't mean there's money in the bank!

Have some impulse control! Just because it's pretty doesn't mean there's room for it in the house!

Quit asking me stupid questions about the size of her BUTT!

REMAIN SOBER AT LEAST 95% OF THE TIME AND GET A DAMN JOB!
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,517
5,452
113
#25
I would need her to...

Do basic math! Just because you still have checks doesn't mean there's money in the bank!

Have some impulse control! Just because it's pretty doesn't mean there's room for it in the house!

Quit asking me stupid questions about the size of her BUTT!

REMAIN SOBER AT LEAST 95% OF THE TIME AND GET A DAMN JOB!
Wow.

It sounds like you've had some pretty negative experiences with women.

I had to chuckle though because your description sounds exactly like the last boyfriend I had...

Which is a big reason as to why I haven't had another in almost 20 years.

All I kept meeting was more of the same.

Praise God for family and friends - they're what keeps me afloat.

God bless you in your search! 🌟
 
Jan 5, 2022
1,224
620
113
37
"A higher plane," hehe
www.youtube.com
#26
Wow.

It sounds like you've had some pretty negative experiences with women.

I had to chuckle though because your description sounds exactly like the last boyfriend I had...

Which is a big reason as to why I haven't had another in almost 20 years.

All I kept meeting was more of the same.

Praise God for family and friends - they're what keeps me afloat.

God bless you in your search! 🌟
Any man who asks if his butt is too big should be kicked to the curb IMMEDIATELY. Just sayin'!
 
S

SimpleSheep

Guest
#27
I would need her to...

Do basic math! Just because you still have checks doesn't mean there's money in the bank!

Have some impulse control! Just because it's pretty doesn't mean there's room for it in the house!

Quit asking me stupid questions about the size of her BUTT!

REMAIN SOBER AT LEAST 95% OF THE TIME AND GET A DAMN JOB!
Are you describing an ex here? She sounds…interesting. o_O
 
S

SimpleSheep

Guest
#29
She sounds like a foolish decision and someone who is incompetent at basic adulting (like my brother's ex).
I was trying to be polite when I said “interesting.” Lol
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,517
5,452
113
#30
Any man who asks if his butt is too big should be kicked to the curb IMMEDIATELY. Just sayin'!
Lol.

He didn't ask me about the size of his butt, but he did have a bit of an ego and liked to brag to me that women often told him how cute it was. 😒
 
S

SimpleSheep

Guest
#31
Lol.

He didn't ask me about the size of his butt, but he did have a bit of an ego and liked to brag to me that women often told him how cute it was. 😒
Ugh that would have annoyed me!
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,598
17,062
113
69
Tennessee
#32
'For as he thinketh in his heart so is he' Prov 23:7

I need him to pull the toilet tissue from the front and NOT the back, if he wants peace😂!
I've been trained to install the roll this way. When I was single, I had in unrolling in the back.
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,721
113
Georgia
#34
I need him to cuddle me... cant cuddle myself.. lol
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
#36
Now, now... We all know what "cuddling" leads to... :censored:
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#37
I have blanked out all disastrous dating experiences from memory
I have probably forgotten what are you actually meant to do on a date.

Married people dont actually go on dates anyway since they are married they live with each other and see each other all the time.

so I think I would need him not to snore. But how can you test for future snoring? Do you suggest you go to a really long and boring movie, drink lots of coca cola so you stay awake but he falls asleep and then monitor his breathing?
 
J

JAPOV

Guest
#38
I have blanked out all disastrous dating experiences from memory
I have probably forgotten what are you actually meant to do on a date.

Married people dont actually go on dates anyway since they are married they live with each other and see each other all the time.

so I think I would need him not to snore. But how can you test for future snoring? Do you suggest you go to a really long and boring movie, drink lots of coca cola so you stay awake but he falls asleep and then monitor his breathing?
How do you know YOU don't snore? :eek:
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#40
How do you know YOU don't snore? :eek:
well...I have fallen asleep in movies and in meetings and nobody's complained. I am sure someone would be kind enough to tell me if I did.

According to this site, its common amongst men especially, but I do know in my household my mum is the snorer AND talks in her sleep. And when my grandma was alive everyone knew she snored she was famous for it.

https://www.sleepcycle.com/snoring/how-to-stop-snoring/

I suppose if it cant be helped perhaps wear ear plugs to bed?

I am not very loud person but my sister has actually complained that I sneeze too loudly.
My thing with her is that when she wakes up she puts the tv on so instead of waking up to birdsong all you hear when shes around is the sound of commercials and news reports. At 6am in the morning I am not ready for bad news. I just want to pray and eat my breakfast in peace.