Oh no, please, it's nice and rare to hear some authentic testimony like this, very relatable, especially the loneliness part. I'm of the millennial generation, maybe not as experienced in life and seasoned with age as you are, but I've already felt what Paul said in Philippians 3:8, that all I've once thought gain and held dear are counted as loss.
2020 was a turning point is American and world history, but also a turning point for me. It was not just the PLANdemic and the shutdown, it was much more than that, there's this DEMONIC spirit of wokeness sweeping across the entire western hemisphere. Since then, everything I used to enjoy became an abomination, all these big businesses there were not much involved in politics before were all going woke, they all spoke in the same voice echoing the same agenda like the ten kings worshiping the Beast, meanwhile the quality of their products and contents sharply decliend. All these idols had just collapsed, I actually didn't want to leave them, I really wanna hang onto them as an escape, but they left me. They've lost their appeal to me. Before 2020 they were just spiritual junk food, now they were POISON. And in my hunger and thirst, the Holy Spirit pointed me to Jesus, the Bread of Life and Living Water.
For now I'm still deep in struggle with the temptation of backsliding everyday, especially in my most vulnerable moments when I'm stressed and sleepy, when my mind is like mush with my guard down. But now I can hear the Holy Spirit speaking in my heart, it's as faint as a whisper, barely audible, and yet it's so powerful that it convicts me of my sin and disciplines my behavior. For now it's just in the passive stage, that I'm still in the process of purging these idols from my heart while developing my relationship with God. And when I'm with the Holy Spirit, medidating on God's words and discussing them with others, time just flies away. Holy Spirit just magically shortens every long and hard day bringing me closer to God. Truly, a thousand years is like one day with the Lord. That's not just a prophetic statement, but also a spiritual experience.