autism
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I think look at everyones strengths not their weaknesses and that will then open doors
and some of those stengths are more than what an ordinary (neurotypical) person can achieve maybe because they have had to focus and concentrate a lot harder and repeat things so much
the friends thing most people find hard, sometimes its animals that are easier to make friends with because they also dont speak human language but you can learn a lot from body language from an animal, they have more time and not so hurried...in todays world humans are always hurrying and have to be on schedule for every little thing esp if living in a city it can be very stressful
and some of those stengths are more than what an ordinary (neurotypical) person can achieve maybe because they have had to focus and concentrate a lot harder and repeat things so much
the friends thing most people find hard, sometimes its animals that are easier to make friends with because they also dont speak human language but you can learn a lot from body language from an animal, they have more time and not so hurried...in todays world humans are always hurrying and have to be on schedule for every little thing esp if living in a city it can be very stressful
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neurotypicals apparently view things from pattern to detail
while those with autism see things from details and then have to figure out how to make the pattern
I also learned from the book some can have rigid black and white thinking
But then again when people are learning they have that to start off with anyway and then learn to see shades of gray, and then eventually full colour
What struck me is that ok there is a developmental delay and obviously something is missing, misfiring or just not connecting in the brain, but that doesnt mean someone cant learn or stays that way forever.
Helen Keller at first became blind and deaf and was full of rage and not being able to see or articulate what she needed but then. she did learn how to read, write and communicate. Yes she needed a lot of help and guidance but then. was able to lead a full life despite her senses never getting better or cured.
while those with autism see things from details and then have to figure out how to make the pattern
I also learned from the book some can have rigid black and white thinking
But then again when people are learning they have that to start off with anyway and then learn to see shades of gray, and then eventually full colour
What struck me is that ok there is a developmental delay and obviously something is missing, misfiring or just not connecting in the brain, but that doesnt mean someone cant learn or stays that way forever.
Helen Keller at first became blind and deaf and was full of rage and not being able to see or articulate what she needed but then. she did learn how to read, write and communicate. Yes she needed a lot of help and guidance but then. was able to lead a full life despite her senses never getting better or cured.
from reading Temple Grandins mothers memoir I gather that her mother actually was not really around for much if her childhood, or her dad for that matter. They were wealthy, so had a nanny, and Temple was farmed out to relatives and boarding school where others mentored her.
The only thing that was particularly autistic was that when a child, Temple wouldnt speak until she was around 4 years old...then she wouldnt shut up. So language delay.
she was not deaf and she scans showed no brain damage.
Other than that it was like they did not really bond. Being raised in a wealthy, bostonian family (her mother was a society debutante, her dad was a real estate agent but lost his job and fell back on 'old money' im stocks) Temple was seen as odd because she wouldnt fit in to that highly social whirl..and her dad was going to institutionalise her.
Back then they thought it was just being retarded (delayed) so...? It seems to me a weird label though her mother had other children after Temple Im still not sure what exactly autism is.
if her mother wasnt bonding with her as a child, and it seems Temple was quite indifferent, then she might not have actually WANTED to be her mothers child?
One of my friends constantly tells me and others that her son has ADHD. But whenever Ive interacted with him, he doesnt seem anything other than a boy. I expect most young people not to really get along with their parents anyway lol
I dont want to blame parents, but sometimes children act out because their parents lack nuturing skills. if its their first child. of course they have often no idea what to do. its not a given that babies/children naturally love their parents and attach to them straight away. Temples mother wrote that when her child was born she was immediately taken away by nurses and she has hazy memories of their vital first days. She had problems feeding etc. I thought she would interact more with her child but seemed she had no clue how to be a mother to be honest. (but didnt actually want to admit this in her memoir)
if you the mother its really on you to initiate the contact not the child.
The only thing that was particularly autistic was that when a child, Temple wouldnt speak until she was around 4 years old...then she wouldnt shut up. So language delay.
she was not deaf and she scans showed no brain damage.
Other than that it was like they did not really bond. Being raised in a wealthy, bostonian family (her mother was a society debutante, her dad was a real estate agent but lost his job and fell back on 'old money' im stocks) Temple was seen as odd because she wouldnt fit in to that highly social whirl..and her dad was going to institutionalise her.
Back then they thought it was just being retarded (delayed) so...? It seems to me a weird label though her mother had other children after Temple Im still not sure what exactly autism is.
if her mother wasnt bonding with her as a child, and it seems Temple was quite indifferent, then she might not have actually WANTED to be her mothers child?
One of my friends constantly tells me and others that her son has ADHD. But whenever Ive interacted with him, he doesnt seem anything other than a boy. I expect most young people not to really get along with their parents anyway lol
I dont want to blame parents, but sometimes children act out because their parents lack nuturing skills. if its their first child. of course they have often no idea what to do. its not a given that babies/children naturally love their parents and attach to them straight away. Temples mother wrote that when her child was born she was immediately taken away by nurses and she has hazy memories of their vital first days. She had problems feeding etc. I thought she would interact more with her child but seemed she had no clue how to be a mother to be honest. (but didnt actually want to admit this in her memoir)
if you the mother its really on you to initiate the contact not the child.
they call it 'refrigerator mother' theory
but while it has been discredited (by angry parents) it seems there is some truth to it. That some parents arent willing to face. There needs to be early intervention when the child has one on one time bonding with one or both parents, and hands on learning as their brains are developing.
If a baby is hit or shaken when young that can affects a child brain and traumatise them. Before the age of 2 if they are exposed to yelling and screaming or loud disurbances they'll just withdraw and not let anyone touch them.
this is why sleeping with a child in the same room is so important, but many mothers would put babies in a cot and abandon them for hours at a time in another room. this is very scary for a child. They dont have enough life experience to understand what is going on.
with Temple it seems she WAS abused by her father as he chose to absent himself for much of her life and never even got close enough for them to bond, which was partly why she didnt want anyone to touch her. Though she cannot remember this. And nothing about him is ever mentioned in the books shes written.
she may deny this even though shes become a brilliant animal scientist for humane treatment of animals, nobody really looks at humane treatment of infants as its seen as a private matter. Parents are expected to get on with it, with no support from grandparents either and putting children in daycare from 18 months old because the parents work is more important sends a clear message to the child they are not really wanted.
I remember working and my boss had left her under 3 year old at daycare for the entire day she was out working, when her child could have been strapped to her back by her side. we would go pick her up, but it was like she was treated just like a package to be picked up and dropped off at a designated time.
but while it has been discredited (by angry parents) it seems there is some truth to it. That some parents arent willing to face. There needs to be early intervention when the child has one on one time bonding with one or both parents, and hands on learning as their brains are developing.
If a baby is hit or shaken when young that can affects a child brain and traumatise them. Before the age of 2 if they are exposed to yelling and screaming or loud disurbances they'll just withdraw and not let anyone touch them.
this is why sleeping with a child in the same room is so important, but many mothers would put babies in a cot and abandon them for hours at a time in another room. this is very scary for a child. They dont have enough life experience to understand what is going on.
with Temple it seems she WAS abused by her father as he chose to absent himself for much of her life and never even got close enough for them to bond, which was partly why she didnt want anyone to touch her. Though she cannot remember this. And nothing about him is ever mentioned in the books shes written.
she may deny this even though shes become a brilliant animal scientist for humane treatment of animals, nobody really looks at humane treatment of infants as its seen as a private matter. Parents are expected to get on with it, with no support from grandparents either and putting children in daycare from 18 months old because the parents work is more important sends a clear message to the child they are not really wanted.
I remember working and my boss had left her under 3 year old at daycare for the entire day she was out working, when her child could have been strapped to her back by her side. we would go pick her up, but it was like she was treated just like a package to be picked up and dropped off at a designated time.
Note..what I find disturbing is Temple designed a brilliant chute for cattle on their way to being slaughtered, but feedlots are actually kind of like concentration camps for cattle. You have hundreds of cattle in yards where there they are given nothing but hay or grain so they can be fattened up for slaughter. No other stimulation, no trees, no grass growing, no other animals, nothing. The cattle are just given numbers, they dont have chance to develop personalities.
ok this is only ONE example but I had figured Temple did not have a great start to life
Her mother tried to remember what her birth was like unfortunately it seemed like a horrifying birth experience for both, where she was induced, and so strung out on drugs - not sure what drugs are used to induced, but they could have affected both mother and child, especially childs brains which are very soft, pliable and easily damaged when young
The nurses took Temple away immediately and she didnt even get to properly feed for the first ten days, so mother and baby were separated when they should have immediately bonded especially in the first 3 days
Temple DID speak she was saying lah lah and expressing her need for milk
Her mother seems to have blanked out the dads experiences or presence during this time. The. when they did go home a nurse took over (who they did not name) and so mother and baby were STILL separated even six weeks later. Her mother was. not allowed to nurse. Possibly the drugs used for inducement had affected her. Who knows what is in them?
As for formula who knows what is in that too. if it contains wheat, who knows if that wheat had been sprayed with whatver chemicals.
Is this a common birth experience?
Her mother tried to remember what her birth was like unfortunately it seemed like a horrifying birth experience for both, where she was induced, and so strung out on drugs - not sure what drugs are used to induced, but they could have affected both mother and child, especially childs brains which are very soft, pliable and easily damaged when young
The nurses took Temple away immediately and she didnt even get to properly feed for the first ten days, so mother and baby were separated when they should have immediately bonded especially in the first 3 days
Temple DID speak she was saying lah lah and expressing her need for milk
Her mother seems to have blanked out the dads experiences or presence during this time. The. when they did go home a nurse took over (who they did not name) and so mother and baby were STILL separated even six weeks later. Her mother was. not allowed to nurse. Possibly the drugs used for inducement had affected her. Who knows what is in them?
As for formula who knows what is in that too. if it contains wheat, who knows if that wheat had been sprayed with whatver chemicals.
Is this a common birth experience?
Im being a bit of a detective here
trying to find causes of autism if it can be prevented
Because of the rise of ASD in generation or its more reported now than it ever was (I once taught in a school where majority of the kids were special needs) Im thinking what drugs are mothers taking while pregnant...it might even be prescribed painkillers that pregnant mothers take without questioning will this affect my baby, or antidepressants
or any other type of chemical exposure during developmental stage. Babies have thin skin. They dont come with armour. they are truly like sponges.
It is interesting that with brain scans, some neural pathways are not connecting on the outer part of the brain, but there will be a lot of complex connections on the inner part as if to make up for it. BUT early intervention can reconnect them while the brain is still developing.
If parents did more of the hand on hand therapy to connect the right and left sides of the brain, they would hook up. Also I wondered of swaddling an infant child if that still happens or the babies are left exposed and alone for too long.
hospitals can be nasty sterile places that are not great places to be born in...and some nurses can actually damage a newborn chances at bonding with their mother in those vital first days.
the other thing is stressed pregnant mothers eating a chemical loaded diet of fast food and snacks would not be healthy for a newborn.
trying to find causes of autism if it can be prevented
Because of the rise of ASD in generation or its more reported now than it ever was (I once taught in a school where majority of the kids were special needs) Im thinking what drugs are mothers taking while pregnant...it might even be prescribed painkillers that pregnant mothers take without questioning will this affect my baby, or antidepressants
or any other type of chemical exposure during developmental stage. Babies have thin skin. They dont come with armour. they are truly like sponges.
It is interesting that with brain scans, some neural pathways are not connecting on the outer part of the brain, but there will be a lot of complex connections on the inner part as if to make up for it. BUT early intervention can reconnect them while the brain is still developing.
If parents did more of the hand on hand therapy to connect the right and left sides of the brain, they would hook up. Also I wondered of swaddling an infant child if that still happens or the babies are left exposed and alone for too long.
hospitals can be nasty sterile places that are not great places to be born in...and some nurses can actually damage a newborn chances at bonding with their mother in those vital first days.
the other thing is stressed pregnant mothers eating a chemical loaded diet of fast food and snacks would not be healthy for a newborn.
well, thanks for replies even though this thread is now mostly me trying to figure out what it is...
I picked up this graphic book in the school library called Medikidz explain autism
From the way they tell it, autism is just kids that play with marbles and totally ignore other people!
hmmm
then i thought, huh, is there anything wrong with that. Its sounds a bit like extreme introversion to me. So is there an opposite, someone who is TOO extrovert, very social but actually cant do anything complex or useful like mathematic equations or fix things?
like...an actor or actress...looks totally ok on the surface, but inside, their brain is....completely hollow?
I picked up this graphic book in the school library called Medikidz explain autism
From the way they tell it, autism is just kids that play with marbles and totally ignore other people!
hmmm
then i thought, huh, is there anything wrong with that. Its sounds a bit like extreme introversion to me. So is there an opposite, someone who is TOO extrovert, very social but actually cant do anything complex or useful like mathematic equations or fix things?
like...an actor or actress...looks totally ok on the surface, but inside, their brain is....completely hollow?
seems childbirth is shrouded in mystery
when I asked my mother for plunket records of me and all of my siblings, she says she chucked them out
and she didnt want to talk about it
I want to know, what REALLY goes on in hospitals during childbirth and antenatal care or all the mums strung out on drugs?
when I asked my mother for plunket records of me and all of my siblings, she says she chucked them out
and she didnt want to talk about it
I want to know, what REALLY goes on in hospitals during childbirth and antenatal care or all the mums strung out on drugs?
@Robertt
bumping this thread, feel free to comment , the more we learn about neurodiversity, the better
I know what is like to have a stigma attached to you like 'mental illness' if theres a diagnosis in the APA
but the more science is finding out the more you can find out how to overcome any challenges.
it used to be that anyone suffering from any sort of mental dysfunction was locked away in an institution and left to suffer, but now I think ppl have more understanding and compassion
I wish the same could be said for other things like dementia
bumping this thread, feel free to comment , the more we learn about neurodiversity, the better
I know what is like to have a stigma attached to you like 'mental illness' if theres a diagnosis in the APA
but the more science is finding out the more you can find out how to overcome any challenges.
it used to be that anyone suffering from any sort of mental dysfunction was locked away in an institution and left to suffer, but now I think ppl have more understanding and compassion
I wish the same could be said for other things like dementia
They change the titles of our situations regularly
I was born with Asperger’s . How did this manifest in my life ?
1. No friends - I didn’t realise I had no friends u tip I was in teens as I assumed everyone was like me . Talk to people at school. They must be my friends . In my teens I heard people speak of friends and valuable they were . The intimacy they shared . I har never known that
I loved board games as a boy (still do) but with no friends I had to learn how to play by myself , whether it monopoly or any other game . I could play 4 -6 players and enjoy the game .
2. no girlfriends - this I did notice early . Even when 6 yrs old I had a desire to get to know girls , but none would talk to me . I was ignored I felt , again many years later sone of these girls would tell me “we sending you signals/ hints all the time “ I didn’t see them , they thought I was ignoring them.
Due to this lack of skills all my life I have never asked a girl on a date . Been married more than once , didn’t ask them to marry me they asked me . I am totally insecure in who I am due to my awareness of my lack of social skills ,
When young you don’t feel so bad as you don’t know how different you are . The older we get the more we learn how inept we are at just talking
3. Perceptions - sadly as I dont have social skills I say what I think and don’t realise that not everyone wants to know what I know . I was called a “know it all” all my life . Again didn’t hurt when young , hurts now as I realise it a bad name .people perceive me as heartless and unfeeling as I don’t stop saying what I think when you it may hurt people . I tell people solutions to their problems as that is what I would like But I am learning people don’t want solutions , just an ear to hear
So yeah that a little about me . Sad life but we all had challenges .
So please remember if I say/type things that offend it is not my intent . And I win even know I did it . Forgive me
If you single and don’t like being single If you a patient person. Maybe , just maybe if you hear the Holy Spirit , take a chance , get to know me
I was born with Asperger’s . How did this manifest in my life ?
1. No friends - I didn’t realise I had no friends u tip I was in teens as I assumed everyone was like me . Talk to people at school. They must be my friends . In my teens I heard people speak of friends and valuable they were . The intimacy they shared . I har never known that
I loved board games as a boy (still do) but with no friends I had to learn how to play by myself , whether it monopoly or any other game . I could play 4 -6 players and enjoy the game .
2. no girlfriends - this I did notice early . Even when 6 yrs old I had a desire to get to know girls , but none would talk to me . I was ignored I felt , again many years later sone of these girls would tell me “we sending you signals/ hints all the time “ I didn’t see them , they thought I was ignoring them.
Due to this lack of skills all my life I have never asked a girl on a date . Been married more than once , didn’t ask them to marry me they asked me . I am totally insecure in who I am due to my awareness of my lack of social skills ,
When young you don’t feel so bad as you don’t know how different you are . The older we get the more we learn how inept we are at just talking
3. Perceptions - sadly as I dont have social skills I say what I think and don’t realise that not everyone wants to know what I know . I was called a “know it all” all my life . Again didn’t hurt when young , hurts now as I realise it a bad name .people perceive me as heartless and unfeeling as I don’t stop saying what I think when you it may hurt people . I tell people solutions to their problems as that is what I would like But I am learning people don’t want solutions , just an ear to hear
So yeah that a little about me . Sad life but we all had challenges .
So please remember if I say/type things that offend it is not my intent . And I win even know I did it . Forgive me
If you single and don’t like being single If you a patient person. Maybe , just maybe if you hear the Holy Spirit , take a chance , get to know me
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thanks for posting this
I think social skills can be taught, sometimes people dont always pick them up naturally
its like reading sometimes has to be taught and language
while others just pick it up when young naturally, for others its a struggle and takes longer
ppl used to say oh he or she is retarded or a retard, but they would attach a negative association to it, as if a slow learner cant ever learn, but maybe their learning style is different or they are just using or focusing on other senses. I think it comes down to sensory processing, because autistic indivduals can learn other things very rapidly because they are sensitive in other areas
its just people dont notice or value that
I think social skills can be taught, sometimes people dont always pick them up naturally
its like reading sometimes has to be taught and language
while others just pick it up when young naturally, for others its a struggle and takes longer
ppl used to say oh he or she is retarded or a retard, but they would attach a negative association to it, as if a slow learner cant ever learn, but maybe their learning style is different or they are just using or focusing on other senses. I think it comes down to sensory processing, because autistic indivduals can learn other things very rapidly because they are sensitive in other areas
its just people dont notice or value that
And having tried fir all my life to learn , there are limits to what we can and can’t do
My highest learning is if someone doesn’t understand me , I move on .
If a girl isn’t interested then sadly I know my limits so I will await the next .
Fir me it is in gods hand to create the interest as I can’t do it
My highest learning is if someone doesn’t understand me , I move on .
If a girl isn’t interested then sadly I know my limits so I will await the next .
Fir me it is in gods hand to create the interest as I can’t do it
My Business partner son has it...they are trying to get him to talk more....they count words spoken daily by him.
He would rather do household chores than to talk. That's some serious avoidance....
But otherwise he seems healthy and happy. Loves my bread over sugary breakfast cereal. Which is kinda odd. But whatever. Lots of kids like bread.
He would rather do household chores than to talk. That's some serious avoidance....
But otherwise he seems healthy and happy. Loves my bread over sugary breakfast cereal. Which is kinda odd. But whatever. Lots of kids like bread.
mum should be glad he does household chores lol
well my mum would have
but sadly, I am just not interested.
she tries to get me interested in the kitchen but, I. sorry am just not fussed about cooking. I will do it on my own but, and for myself, but Im not going to do it while at the same time being bossed around and treated like a slave lol
well my mum would have
but sadly, I am just not interested.
she tries to get me interested in the kitchen but, I. sorry am just not fussed about cooking. I will do it on my own but, and for myself, but Im not going to do it while at the same time being bossed around and treated like a slave lol
Because he has to be a member of society in order to function and survive.
The boy will trade words he has to say every day for household chores. 1,000 words a day isn't a lot. Some kids won't stop talking. But this 12 year old is brilliant....top marks in schoolwork.
But just finds it difficult to talk. It's really difficult for him. But talking is essential to living in a city. From ordering food to buying clothes. He has to overcome the issues....no different than any other child.
Overcoming impediments is a normal part of life. We all have things we have to overcome to be a part of normal society. Hearing loss, color blindness, endocrine disorders, allergies and etc. Talking is just another thing to overcome.
The boy will trade words he has to say every day for household chores. 1,000 words a day isn't a lot. Some kids won't stop talking. But this 12 year old is brilliant....top marks in schoolwork.
But just finds it difficult to talk. It's really difficult for him. But talking is essential to living in a city. From ordering food to buying clothes. He has to overcome the issues....no different than any other child.
Overcoming impediments is a normal part of life. We all have things we have to overcome to be a part of normal society. Hearing loss, color blindness, endocrine disorders, allergies and etc. Talking is just another thing to overcome.
C
The art of effective communication! Surely an important aspect of communicating with someone with ASD is to give them space to be different, and to convey through positive communication that they are accepted and indeed a welcome inclusion into our lives. The next most important aspect would be to get an understanding of the person's communication style so that I can carry out a conversation with them. They would have to do that with me too, because my communication style is not necessarily the easiest to deal with. Am I being overly simple here?