IS LIVING TOGETHER A SIN?

[Kefa52]

It was customary in Jewish days for the couple to live together for a period of time, usually one year, before having sex and therefore being 'Married together' ie. Becoming one flesh.


I'd like to see the scripture or custom refference to this. Couples were promised or arranged for as musch as a year before Marriage but they did not live together.

 

[BarlyGurl]

Colours...it was customary in Jewish days for the couple to live together for a period of time, usually one year, before having sex and therefore being 'Married together' ie. Becoming one flesh.

I'd like to see some EVEIDENCE TOO! I know that to be false... virginity was customarily so carefully guardd by Jewish Culture that on the wedding night consumation... the parents waited outside the door to collect the consumation veil which was a sheet with a slit in it... there would be a blood stain on the sheet to prove the marraige was consumated and the woman was a virgin... It was kept as EVIDENCE in case the husband tried to PUT HER AWAY... to defend the brides legal rights.

 

[amazed]

Getting married under God's law is very different to getting married under man's law. Being obedient to the law of the land is what we have to be, however the law of the land does not say two people have to getting married under the land's law. Sleeping together is sacred, and should only occur in a life time committed relationship.

Getting married under the law of man (am not talking about getting married in church but in court only), you are getting married under the same law that says you can both be same sex, the same law that says it's ok to abort babies.

What is the difference between getting married and consummating that marriage, getting divorced, and doing it all over again and living with someone and being faithful to that someone, but if it doesn't work out you leave. Both are the same sin. It is surely all about commitment.

 

[Colours]

I believe it was that the man would pay a price (not unlike the wedding ring of today) to show his commitment to the woman and also to show that he was able to provide for his wife. Then they would spent a year together before consummating their marriage.

However they were considered married when the male made his commitment to the woman.

I just have say, out of slight shock, that the custom of the mother and father waiting outside the room, seems weird.

Also, some women won't necessarily bleed either.

 

[Colours]

He will leave his mother and father and become one with his wife.

It is about the commitment of the two, to a lifelong partnership.

The exact custom obviously varies within cultures, but a marriage, is two people, who are committed to one another.

 

[Kefa52]

Coppied from another thread.

About Marriage and law.

Romans Chapter 13: 1-7


A Christian’s Duties to the State

1 Everyone must submit to the governing authorities,a for there is no authority except from God, and those that exist are instituted by God.
2 So then, the one who resists the authority is opposing God’s command, and those who oppose it will bring judgment on themselves.
3 For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Do you want to be unafraid of the authority? Do what is good, and you will have its approval.
4 For government is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, because it does not carry the sword for no reason. For government is God’s servant, an avengerd that brings wrath on the one who does wrong.
5 Therefore, you must submit, not only because of wrath, but also because of your conscience.
6 And for this reason you pay taxes, since the authorities are God’s public servants, continually attending to these tasks.
7 Pay your obligations to everyone: taxes to those you owe taxes tolls to those you owe tolls, respect to those you owe respect and honor to those you owe honor.
??
The purpose of Civil Athority (the State) is #1 to Punish evil, #2 Condone Good. The laws are created by God, not man.
??
Marriage does not, and never has been under the State. The State has stepped outside of it's duties my making laws that God does not condone.
How dare the State make laws as to who can and can't marry someone when God already has this set up..I'm not even going to get into Gay marriage.
　
This is why we are to pray for the Men, and Women in athority. So that God will give then knowledge, and wisdom to run the government HIS way.

 

[Colours]

Agreed Kefa. But no law covers bad moral.

If the government tries to make a person engage in activity that is against the laws of God, that person has God-given right to refuse. For instance, conscription to armed forces to kill others.

 

[Kefa52]

Agreed Kefa. But no law covers bad moral.

If the government tries to make a person engage in activity that is against the laws of God, that person has God-given right to refuse. For instance, conscription to armed forces to kill others.]

This is incorrect.^


Romans 13:4

4 For government is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, because it does not carry the sword for no reason. For government is God’s servant, an avenger that brings wrath on the one who does wrong.
Romans 13: 1-2
1 Everyone must submit to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except from God,and those that exist are instituted by God.
2 So then, the one who resists the authority is opposing God’s command, and those who oppose it will bring judgment on themselves.

Everyone must submit to the governing authorities. Why? Because the Government submits to God.
Through the Governments athority from God a soldier is appointed, sanctioned with a ceremony and given a uniform to show his position under God. When a soldier takes a life "protecting good" he is not murdering.
Killing or murdering is when we choose to take the sword apon ourselves with out appointment. We must leave room for Gods wrath.
Is our Government perfect? No. Pray for our leaders that they submit to God.

If the government tries to make a person engage in activity that is against the laws of God, that person has God-given right to refuse. For instance, conscription to armed forces to kill others.]

2 So then, The one who resists the authority is opposing God’s command,and those who oppose it will bring judgment on themselves.

 

[Kefa52]

Enough of this. The original question was is it sinful to be shacked up.

 

[Colours]

Wait, so if the government says 'go and rape and pillage. You must do this by law'. Or 'your government commands you to go and kill', then we have to do it?

That is ludicrously wrong.

 

[seekingg]

IT IS A SIN..... YOUR ARE SUPPOSE TO FLEE FROM SIN, NOT GET AS CLOSE TO IT AS POSSIBLE WITH OUT TOUCHING IT.

 

[starfield]

Cohabitation is fornication.

 

[BarlyGurl]

Cohabitation is fornication.

Cohabitation is NOT fornication. Cohabitation is living together/ shared housing. Fornication is having illicit/sinful sex. The two words are entirely separate and distinct terms. "Shacking-up" means cohabitating as if married without the benefit of the MARRIAGE... sometimes referred to as a "try-out marriage"... it is sinful.

 

[jandian]

The bible made references to marriage ceremonies quite a few time. So there must be some importance to it.

 

[gracethroughfaith]

When does marriage (in God's eyes) occur?

When two agree to be married!

When a man looks upon a woman desiring her to be his wife and she does not agree or is not sure she is ready to marry or what ever the case may be. They are not married.

If they choose to date but not agree to marry and have sex before agreement of marriage this is SIN it is fornication.

Sex does not make a marriage. Sex consummates the marriage.

CONSUMMATE, a. Complete; perfect;

So, is living together a sin? YES, if not in agreement of marriage.

Once in agreement of marriage you are married in the eyes of God. A promise has been made and God holds all mankind to there promises.

 

[gracethroughfaith]

Cohabitation is NOT fornication. Cohabitation is living together/ shared housing. Fornication is having illicit/sinful sex. The two words are entirely separate and distinct terms. "Shacking-up" means cohabitating as if married without the benefit of the MARRIAGE... sometimes referred to as a "try-out marriage"... it is sinful.

BarlyGurl:
We must keep in mind that living together brings about the very appearance of evil and temptation is set before us always.

Now God commands us to abstain from all appearance of evil.

1 Thessalonians 5:22-23 (KJV)
22 Abstain from all appearance of evil.
23 And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.


If we are commanded to avoid even the very appearance of evil then co-habitation with the opposite sex is sin because there will always be the appearance of evil.
And we are to obey every ordinance of God. YES?

Also we are to pray and watch that we enter not into temptation.
So if we move in with someone of the opposite sex we have entered into temptation.

Matthew 26:41 (KJV)
41 Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.


Mark 14:38 (KJV)
38 Watch ye and pray, lest ye enter into temptation. The spirit truly is ready, but the flesh is weak.


WE can not give excuse for why two people of the opposite sex are living together.
Yes, I do understand how expensive the heating and light bills and rent can be. But that is no excuse for living together outside of marriage.

If WE as an individual can not meet our bills on our current income we have to make an adjustment in our life.

Eather find something more affordable, closer to work, etc. OR the best thing to do....

Give it over to God and trust him to provide the needed income to pay the bills.
He is responsible for us as our father. When we give our life to him we no longer take thought for the things of this world, our needs, He does all that for us just as we do for our own children.

Do we expect our children to pay the light bill, gas bill, monthly housing bill (rent), etc. NO!
Neather does God expect us to make those expenses in our lives as his children. He is our father, He is the provider in our life.

Now if we take out a loan thats on us. God tells us not to borrow from anyone.

So if we need help with bills, we can eather do it our way and struggle or do it God's way and take no thought for any of it and live in peace with our LORD.
But to shack up with the opposite sex for any reason outside of marriage is wrong in the eyes of God.

 

[NeedingCounsel]

I am one of these people that have came to this forum seeking prayers for my union with my fiance. We were living together and had talked about marriage in the past but never moved forward with it. Satan had his hands on every aspect of our everyday life, in some ways he is still there. We were living in an unholy union and Satan was having a heyday.

We have recently separated and it might sound selfish but I almost immediately turned to God for guidance. I came here and put in a prayer request for God to fix the problems with our life and our relationship.

I'm working hard spiritually to set everything right and live the way the lord wants me to. I know that living in an unholy union has been one of our many problems and I am starting to add to my prayers that when we are reunited that our union become a holy one and that God is glorified by our life together. It is important for us that when we begin to live together it comes after marriage, otherwise Satan is going to try his best to tare down our unions and stomp them into oblivion.

 

[Jenjoy]

I am one of these people that have came to this forum seeking prayers for my union with my fiance. We were living together and had talked about marriage in the past but never moved forward with it. Satan had his hands on every aspect of our everyday life, in some ways he is still there. We were living in an unholy union and Satan was having a heyday.

We have recently separated and it might sound selfish but I almost immediately turned to God for guidance. I came here and put in a prayer request for God to fix the problems with our life and our relationship.

I'm working hard spiritually to set everything right and live the way the lord wants me to. I know that living in an unholy union has been one of our many problems and I am starting to add to my prayers that when we are reunited that our union become a holy one and that God is glorified by our life together. It is important for us that when we begin to live together it comes after marriage, otherwise Satan is going to try his best to tare down our unions and stomp them into oblivion.

I hope it works out for you and it's smart not selfish to turn to GOD. You're his child and he loves yout and wants your to turn to him.


God bless you

 

[NeedingCounsel]

Thank you Jenjoy. I'm going to continue to pray everyday that God see his way into both of our lives and that his will be done.

 

[BarlyGurl]

BarlyGurl: [/SIZE]
We must keep in mind that living together brings about the very appearance of evil and temptation is set before us always.

I am sorry, I thought I was pretty clear in defining cohabitation as people sharing housing... any people, a family cohabitates... Simply living under the same roof does not implicate a sexual relationship or present a temptation for one. I am sorry your logic is faulty and the theology is legalistic. If by cohabitating people are guilty of creating an evil appearance by implicating a sexual realtionship then NONE but a man and a woman who are married should or could EVER live together. Siblings or cousins or anyone with any sort of familial relationship would be appearing incestuous, two men or two women cohabitating would be displaying homosexuality, even worse implications for groups of more than 2 persons and mixed gender, Single foster parent or caregivng arrangements would be demonstrating pedaphilia or other offensive exploitive sexual realtionships. I was also very clear to define "SHAKING-UP" as the cohabitating as man and wife without the benefit of marriage which IS a sinful practice... so in making those distinctions I think I have presented well, the mistake of your logic. YOu can set whatever boundaries for yourself... but using your personal restriction as a measuring rod of others is legalism and prohibited by scripture.

]Now God commands us to abstain from all appearance of evil.

If we were to follow through with your presented argument that no one but a married man and woman could live together as all others give appearance of evil... than NO ONE would live together and EVERYONE would be living in FEAR of presenting an evil appearance. God has no given us a spirit of fear but a sound mind... I am hoping the the audience shall reason rightly here and not be decieved or imprisoned by the enemy to wrong thinking regarding the argument and scenario.

1Thes. 5-9 For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. 10 He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. 11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. 12 Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. 13 Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other. 14 And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone. 15 Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else.

Living singly isn't necessarily in anyone's best interest when considering the communality theme of these verses...is it?

]If we are commanded to avoid even the very appearance of evil then co-habitation with the opposite sex is sin because there will always be the appearance of evil.

And so as I have tried to point out... so it would also be for two men, or two women... etc. This thinking LEAPS to presumptive conclusion... IN your case a heterosexual one... in another mind any variety of illicit sexual sin conduct according to the prejudice, lust and/or conceits of the observers heart.