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sigh i started disliking all people back when i had a retail that stretched from seasonal work till lasting through the first two years of college. My dislike grew stronger when i waited tables. So i can give you this much advice, Women aren't bad. so more than others, but everybody sucks. that isnt going to change. But there are a lot of good people out there who have covered up the worst parts of themselves and are wonderfully enjoyable to be around and have in your life. You just need to find some for yourself.
J
Buff Old Guy, I'm very sorry for what you have experienced in your family. I'm glad you felt comfortable venting here. In time I hope you realize that not all women are like that, but many are. Shamefully, some are even proud of it, as I frequently hear them bragging about how they "set their man straight", got up in this person or that person's face, blah, blah, blah. It is a feministic perversion of what a woman should be....take this song for example:
"But I ain't laying down, baby, I ain't goin' down
Can't nobody tell me how it's gonna be
Nobody's gonna make a fool out of me
Baby, you should know that I lead not follow"
It's not too late for ladies to be ladies. Unfortunately, too many people mistake being a lady for weakness, not realizing the strength being a lady requires.
[video=youtube;TETOnLVEVfY]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TETOnLVEVfY[/video]
"But I ain't laying down, baby, I ain't goin' down
Can't nobody tell me how it's gonna be
Nobody's gonna make a fool out of me
Baby, you should know that I lead not follow"
It's not too late for ladies to be ladies. Unfortunately, too many people mistake being a lady for weakness, not realizing the strength being a lady requires.
[video=youtube;TETOnLVEVfY]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TETOnLVEVfY[/video]
B
Will you be my Daddy?
lol I guess a good male role model would be helpful. I still think the women with problems not being selfish trolls would solve the problem though. It's like your saying.. I should have an expert in detecting when lies are made by people...helpful... but I think people not lying would destroy the problem. So, yeah a male mentor showing me how to avoid women with issues would be awesome but the women with problems... not acting the way I described above is even better. Thanks though, you brought a really good point... I would like someone to teach a few things about women. I don't have many guy friends in real life... so I should make some of those.
lol I guess a good male role model would be helpful. I still think the women with problems not being selfish trolls would solve the problem though. It's like your saying.. I should have an expert in detecting when lies are made by people...helpful... but I think people not lying would destroy the problem. So, yeah a male mentor showing me how to avoid women with issues would be awesome but the women with problems... not acting the way I described above is even better. Thanks though, you brought a really good point... I would like someone to teach a few things about women. I don't have many guy friends in real life... so I should make some of those.
K
You attract who you are...................want to make difference, it starts with you. i had the same problem with men, but until i got saved and changed my ways, i had the same problems. but now i enjoy the people i hangout with for they are christian. i also changed and i believe i will find the right person some day
R
OP, you rob yourself of a lot when you put your happiness on other people changing for you. You cheat yourself of peace when you put it in someone elses hands.
Yeah I get that if you've been bitten by the same animal over and over, you are going to trust that animal less.
Some people are scared of dogs their whole lives (for example) because they've been attacked.
Does that mean all dogs on earth should change? Is the person making bad dogs change by holding a grudge against all dogs? Seriously, think about it.
You aren't going to make "all the mean women on earth" change just by not forgiving the few who have betrayed your trust.
You need forgiveness in your heart before you can start to heal. I'm assuming you are a Christian? If so, you need to trust God too. The real kind of trust. Not the fake trust that goes away as soon as the prayer ends.
We don't all suck, really.
And sure there are mean people out there, but it is not our job to single-handedly change everyone. If you aim to inspire change, it should come from divine inspiration from God, and nothing less.
You can tell the difference because if it's from GOD it will not have a tinge of desperation and past issues.
Yeah I get that if you've been bitten by the same animal over and over, you are going to trust that animal less.
Some people are scared of dogs their whole lives (for example) because they've been attacked.
Does that mean all dogs on earth should change? Is the person making bad dogs change by holding a grudge against all dogs? Seriously, think about it.
You aren't going to make "all the mean women on earth" change just by not forgiving the few who have betrayed your trust.
You need forgiveness in your heart before you can start to heal. I'm assuming you are a Christian? If so, you need to trust God too. The real kind of trust. Not the fake trust that goes away as soon as the prayer ends.
We don't all suck, really.
And sure there are mean people out there, but it is not our job to single-handedly change everyone. If you aim to inspire change, it should come from divine inspiration from God, and nothing less.
You can tell the difference because if it's from GOD it will not have a tinge of desperation and past issues.
I understand lack of trust and being angry with the opposite sex. However, being angry at the entire gender is self serving. You're angry, bitter, and hurt by the core women in your life. Which is understandable. Your mom is supposed to take care of you, love you, and when you're hurt, make things better. They're not human in their children's eyes, they're not allowed to sin. In your case, your mother MAJORLY messed up, and I'm sure her stealing from you isn't her only sin against you.
As for your aunt, I'm assuming it's your mother's sister. I assume it's her sister because they seem similar. Now, anger is a SECONDARY emotion, meaning that hurt or pain came first. It sounds like your aunt is acting out of pain, frustration, and depression. This is my general profile, but I believe it has credibility.
As for you, get out of your house. You're miserable there. If you can't get out of your house, then grow up and above what's going on. See, we continue with behaviors because it does something for us. You like your emotional state (your anger and bitterness) to some degree. It gives you power and you have some sort of justification for it. I believe you're afraid, which is why you don't want to trust women. I also think you don't want to seek out healthier people (men in particular) because you want to stay the same. However, you posted this thread, so perhaps you want to change to some degree. You've got a lot of work to do. Starting now is so much better than starting tomorrow.
As for your aunt, I'm assuming it's your mother's sister. I assume it's her sister because they seem similar. Now, anger is a SECONDARY emotion, meaning that hurt or pain came first. It sounds like your aunt is acting out of pain, frustration, and depression. This is my general profile, but I believe it has credibility.
As for you, get out of your house. You're miserable there. If you can't get out of your house, then grow up and above what's going on. See, we continue with behaviors because it does something for us. You like your emotional state (your anger and bitterness) to some degree. It gives you power and you have some sort of justification for it. I believe you're afraid, which is why you don't want to trust women. I also think you don't want to seek out healthier people (men in particular) because you want to stay the same. However, you posted this thread, so perhaps you want to change to some degree. You've got a lot of work to do. Starting now is so much better than starting tomorrow.
B
I'm not sure if even want to talk to you but okay. I think your just looking for trouble but for the sake of making things clear for everybody else... here you go and hopefully you understand me better after this too.
The way my aunt complains is different from how I complain. She is what I'd call a fatalistic complainer... she points out negative things and then assumes and is convinced bad things are going to happen. For example, one day, when I got into my car (the car was in parking position [key point]) from the passenger side... and tried to get into the drivers seat. (I forgot why but I did it that way) My foot accidentally turned off the car because it hit the keys. The keys were still in the car, in the on position. Anyways, my aunts face focused on that and stared and I said. "aunt its okay just go home." She stayed for a moment still focused and stared at my foot as if to supervise... and I said again "aunt don't worry just go" and she remarked in a complaining voice and crunched up her face, almost seemed like a sad face "but you turned off the car with youur foooot" I replied, "yeah I know, it's no big deal" and hesitantly she left. It wasn't a big deal but somehow some little accident seemed like a big deal. I think she's paranoid about little bad things.
Also, when were running against the clock... if I'm not moving at the pace she thinks is best... she assumes and says things like "your gonna be late", "Your late" but in reality... I can count the number of times I've been late on one hand in the past FEW YEARS. But imagine hearing that on a daily basis. It would get old and annoying really fast. I snapped at her once about that... I've tried explaining to her in a nice way several times by the way. Anyways, she can complain about things and is fatalistic about things.... it sucks.
I on the other hand... am complaining about a behavior that is clearly not right. That's the difference. Her complaints about me... are mostly unjust and my complaints about her are just.
I'm not sure if I let people control how I feel. I think if I do and did... then maybe it's because I open up to people and let others talk to me which would make me and anyone vulnerable. I can't help but be vulnerable. I'm actually a pretty sef-controlled emotionally but nobody is a stone.
About you telling me your reaction... if a man were to talk to you... the way I talked. This is why I doubted about replying to you. Again, I'm not saying that all women are like that... but there are definitely some.
Maybe, there are some things that need to be worked on in me. On the other hand, maybe my reactions were absolutely just. All said and done, woman still have issues aswell... some a hell lot more than others.
I snapped at her because after years of frustrating behavior. In that context, I think I was okay. When things get bad, real bad. I think it's okay to express how bad it is. Would you speak softly in the sight of murder or would you yell? It's clear that yelling would be just if not the only just thing to do.
No offence.
The way my aunt complains is different from how I complain. She is what I'd call a fatalistic complainer... she points out negative things and then assumes and is convinced bad things are going to happen. For example, one day, when I got into my car (the car was in parking position [key point]) from the passenger side... and tried to get into the drivers seat. (I forgot why but I did it that way) My foot accidentally turned off the car because it hit the keys. The keys were still in the car, in the on position. Anyways, my aunts face focused on that and stared and I said. "aunt its okay just go home." She stayed for a moment still focused and stared at my foot as if to supervise... and I said again "aunt don't worry just go" and she remarked in a complaining voice and crunched up her face, almost seemed like a sad face "but you turned off the car with youur foooot" I replied, "yeah I know, it's no big deal" and hesitantly she left. It wasn't a big deal but somehow some little accident seemed like a big deal. I think she's paranoid about little bad things.
Also, when were running against the clock... if I'm not moving at the pace she thinks is best... she assumes and says things like "your gonna be late", "Your late" but in reality... I can count the number of times I've been late on one hand in the past FEW YEARS. But imagine hearing that on a daily basis. It would get old and annoying really fast. I snapped at her once about that... I've tried explaining to her in a nice way several times by the way. Anyways, she can complain about things and is fatalistic about things.... it sucks.
I on the other hand... am complaining about a behavior that is clearly not right. That's the difference. Her complaints about me... are mostly unjust and my complaints about her are just.
I'm not sure if I let people control how I feel. I think if I do and did... then maybe it's because I open up to people and let others talk to me which would make me and anyone vulnerable. I can't help but be vulnerable. I'm actually a pretty sef-controlled emotionally but nobody is a stone.
About you telling me your reaction... if a man were to talk to you... the way I talked. This is why I doubted about replying to you. Again, I'm not saying that all women are like that... but there are definitely some.
Maybe, there are some things that need to be worked on in me. On the other hand, maybe my reactions were absolutely just. All said and done, woman still have issues aswell... some a hell lot more than others.
I snapped at her because after years of frustrating behavior. In that context, I think I was okay. When things get bad, real bad. I think it's okay to express how bad it is. Would you speak softly in the sight of murder or would you yell? It's clear that yelling would be just if not the only just thing to do.
No offence.
R
Okay all I know is people are good, mean, nice, shy and bitter. It doesn't matter if they are male. It doesn't matter if they are female. They all need to be shown respect because at the end of the day we are ALL God's children. Do you think that God approves of the way you spoke to your Aunt or your view on women in general? Is that the way you would like for someone to treat your daughter(if you had one)? Or your future wife? for them to be put in their place? You can't control the way people act or treat you but you can control the way you respond. I'm a lady and I am also a Christian. I have my "moods" where I can be like a bear and I just need to be alone. Does that make me a "troll"? Does that mean I "need to be put in my place"? I am sure that you are a good person and a good christian and I will pray that things are easier for you at home with your Aunt. But I'm not sure if you know how you are coming across or if your aware that some of things that you said could come across as being offensive to other Christian women on here. I'm not sure if I'm answering correctly but you did ask for our thoughts. So my thoughts is this I know what I'm worth as a Christian woman and I would never allow a man to disrespect me or make me feel less of a person no matter how I'm acting. I have come across men like this in the past we didn't get along and they are not a part of my life -At all. Period. I hate that your Aunt seems like someone that is hard to get along with but maybe God was testing you? If he was how do you think you would have scored on that one?
