Question for the Men...... BEWARE, you may not answer.

Dont u think the intimate question goes a bit too far?

Well, maybe more than one question but here it goes;

1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?

2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?

4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?

Thanks!

Well, maybe more than one question but here it goes;

1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?

2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?

4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?

It would be interesting to see if it were the same ideas and opinions for women alike. Married Couples may answer as well as the single ladies.

Thanks!

Well, maybe more than one question but here it goes;

1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?

2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?

4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?

It would be interesting to see if it were the same ideas and opinions for women alike. Married Couples may answer as well as the single ladies.

Thanks!

1. Marriage is a commitment, everything else is just acquaintances.
2. Depends on what relationship, my relationship with my children, the goal is to raise them to be productive citizens, and have their own offspring. The goal of marriage is to stay married until one passes away.
3.what is a promise ring? Don't fornicate.
4. I will rule you between the sheets.

Ok... I burst out laughing when I read Tommy's last answer.

Tommy, I so wish you would have been a member of my childhood church when I was there. You would have given people heart attacks on a daily basis.

Never mind that I'm pretty sure all the men there would have secretly wanted to give you a high five.

A "serious relationship" is when you stop going on dates as a way to spend a weekend and start going on dates to spend time with somebody that you realized you don't ever want to be without. Commitment is when you are willing to switch from "I might stay with you or I might someday be going with somebody else" and switch to "You are the one for me forever." Commitment is scary because you have to close a lot of options and you never know where those other options may have led. But you have to close all but one in order to commit to one.

Do you mean specific goals for a person I'm looking for or what I want the relationship to be?
I haven't met her yet so I have no idea what kind of person she will be. I want the relationship to be two people getting through this life together instead of one person going it alone. Alone is doable. Together would probably be more fun.


I'm 40 years old and I'm still a virgin. (And if you quote that idiotic movie, so help me I WILL put you on ignore!) Sex is not all there is to life. As for promise rings, I have no idea. If it helps a person remember and focus on the reason for waiting, I guess it's a good thing.


Emotionally, neither. Intimately, I have no idea. See my answer to question 3.

I have seen people in a relationship try to establish themselves as dominate or be submissive and let the other be dominant. From what I have observed it never works very well. Even if they do stay together longer than a year, it's always a struggle to maintain. They never can get their relationship to move forward and grow because it takes all their energy just to maintain it where it is.

The relationships I have seen that work well, thrive and last for the long haul are the ones where both are partners and each does what he is good at. It's not a matter of one being the boss and the other obeying. It probably takes a lot more talking between them to make some decisions, but they trust each other, they know their own strengths and each other's strengths, and BOTH are the boss.

This is important enough to need a new paragraph. In the best relationships I have seen BOTH PEOPLE be the boss at different times, depending on who is better at dealing with a given situation. They both know "I am better at this and you are better at that" so as situations come up both of them might take the lead and say "Okay this is what we need to do" and the other will follow because they both know and freely acknowledge "Okay, you are better at this so I will do what you say."

It never seemed to hurt my father's pride to admit that my mother was the one who balanced the checkbook. She was better at it. She also made the budget for our home. He was fine with that because she was better at it and he was happy to let her do it. He was better at hauling firewood. He was also better at running a leather shop, but she did the accounting and they were both fine with it. It's amazing how much bickering dies down when both people in a partnership don't let pride get in the way of deciding who does which tasks best.

Sorry, that was a bit of a long answer. The short answer is I'm probably neither dominant nor passive. Passive? Did you mean submissive? Well I'm not either of them either. I'm cooperative.


You're welcome.

1. Marriage is a commitment, everything else is just acquaintances.
2. Depends on what relationship, my relationship with my children, the goal is to raise them to be productive citizens, and have their own offspring. The goal of marriage is to stay married until one passes away.
3.what is a promise ring? Don't fornicate.
4. I will rule you between the sheets.

Thanks for taking the time to share, appreciate your honesty and promise I will never mention that movie, but you should be proud of being a virgin

*raises hand* Although, I'm 27 and not 40. I'm not entirely ashamed. I think this thread is for people who don't consider themselves possibly single for life, right? Either or? Meh?

1. I think (and this is coming from my own haven’t-dated-in-13-years perspective) that a serious relationship is one where marriage is the goal, or at least the direction things are heading. Commitment is a bit different when dating vs. being married. When you’re dating, or even engaged, no matter how committed you are to that person, you have not yet stood before God and vowed to love, honor and protect them. But marriage...that’s a covenant relationship, it’s not only being committed to that person, it’s also making every effort to fulfill the promises you made to each other before God. It’s learning to love and respect each other by first loving Christ and making Him the center of your marriage. Without that foundation, without God being the focus, people will inevitably elevate the wrong things; themselves, or the children, or money, or someone outside the marriage. So commitment to another person is meaningless without being first committed to God.

2. My goals or preferences have changed immensely over the years I’ve been married. At first, it was about me. My happiness. My needs. My ideas. Even after having two kids, I realize how much my focus was on myself and how much resentment that bred. Thankfully, God (and my husband!) showed patience and mercy and through some really hard lessons I learned that I was wrong. My goals now start with being obedient to God- which has everything to do with my relationship. The fruits of the spirit have no room to grow when everything is about me- and without those fruits, I am unable to properly love and care for my family. So my goals...well, a lot of the time it looks like I’m closing my eyes and jumping, but I have faith that God knows better than I do what the “goal” is, so I’m trying to go with that.

3. ...all good things! I don’t have personal experience with any of them. My past is a mess, but I know a few people who Did wait for the one, and they all say what a blessing it is that they did. Mainly the lack of baggage, of having the ability to make comparisons.

4. I’m pretty passive. Used to be more passive aggressive...but ain’t nobody got time for that. My husband values my opinions and it’s never a war (anymore) of who is going to get their way with anything. He leads, and I follow because I know he’s following Christ. Basically, we both started going the same direction, so it made sense to go together.

...I don’t know if I answered the questions in the way they were meant or not.

Ok... I burst out laughing when I read Tommy's last answer.

Tommy, I so wish you would have been a member of my childhood church when I was there. You would have given people heart attacks on a daily basis.

Never mind that I'm pretty sure all the men there would have secretly wanted to give you a high five.

1. What is your idea of “commitment” in regards to “serious relationships” and what is a “serious relationship” to you?

No idea..


2. Do you have specific “goals” or “preferences” that you want in a relationship?

Not really.


3. What is your idea on promise rings, celibacy, or “waiting for the one”?

Meh


4. Finally, are you the “dominate or passive type” in the relationship both emotionally and intimately?

I enjoy being passively dominant.


5. It would be interesting to see if it were the same ideas and opinions for [men and] women alike.

Not a chance



p.s. - I may or may not still be on break... (not saying that anyone actually cares if I am... )

You seem to be one of the few who appreciates my humor.

Not that my last answer was a joke.

*raises hand* Although, I'm 27 and not 40. I'm not entirely ashamed. I think this thread is for people who don't consider themselves possibly single for life, right? Either or? Meh?