Desperation is a Huge Turn off !!!!!!!!
- Thread starter azlightsout
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K
That has a lot to do with society. Women are sold on marriage and relationships from a young age. From diamond rings to wedding dresses. My husband told me that a man is suppose to spend three months salary for an engagement ring. I told him "dont you dare spend that on a ring for me!" Unbelievable!!
There is a lot of pressure on women to nab her man. So many people pushed me to get married fast. I was on my 40s, I guess they were afraid I was going to lose him. We took our time and I never mentioned a ring,not even a hint. In fact,he lived alone in the house we bought for a year until we got married. I wanted to make good and sure that he knew what he was doing and it was what he really wanted.I didn't want him to turn around and say I pushed him when he wasn't ready. I dont understand women that throw themselves at men.Ive never seen that type of relationship work out yet.
Some people want someone who isn't desperate, be 'just friends' for ages and then they complain that the ones they do like don't need anyone and have a huge demands list. It's one or the other. I think it's attractive, well unless like one guy, he wouldn't even let me pray about it and ask God. I had to. Now. I only spoke to him for 2 days, a few messages. That was even scary to me LOL. He'd do everything, clean, cook. He also did that all plus a job for his ex. I could just sit on my lazy butt. Stupid that I didn't do it lol.
Why do people have to think for years? If God says that's the one, that's that. Derek Prince got his wife like that, God told them both, Torben Sondergaard. God said: that's your wife. Smith Wigglesworth. One preacher here, God told him and her, but she had to wait 5 years until he was ready. God needed to change his heart first. He wanted to be single. Now they're happily married. Poor woman. Don't think I'd have so much patience.
K
Well my sister rushed into marriage, she felt her husband was the one. He was a youth leader in his church and on the board.What's not to love? But he has been abusive to her. Never hit her,that I know of, but beat holes in the walls, emotionally abused her, called her all kinds of horrible names. Serious anger issues. Finally had to go on meds to cope and keep the marriage together. So I took my time, and we talked a lot about expectations. I dont see being in a rush to marry. Too many sob stories of people that are divorced because they didn't take time to get to know their future spouse. I wanted to make sure we knew what we wanted. We had both been single and set in our ways for a long time. I wouldn't change a thing if I could go back in time. Waiting made me appreciate marriage all the more.
Understandable. I still believe it can work though, but then both must be really sure. The devil also gives dreams. I thought I had to marry a guy. In the dream he got filled with the Holy Spirit and didn't need pot anymore. Then later God told me to break it off. I said: Why? He was so kind to answer me. Ask him if he wants prayer to be set free from pot. So I did. Noooooooooo! God made pot! It's good! You stupid evangelicals!
So that was my answer.
So that was my answer.
C
Well I wanted the ring and all the trimmings even if I had to buy it myself. Hubby chased me for a good six months because I wasn't ready to settle down. He was the sweetest most persistent man. Of course he wasn't a Christian at the time but he was still a "good" person..and I'm a woman who likes the chase..being thought of as someone worth fighting for fed directly into my feminine ego..but he never came across as "desperate "I wouldn't Like "desperate" because it seems like stalker material in my opinion.
