Disconnecting to connect again

[Fenner]

The past few months I've been disconnecting myself and family from technology, it's been great. Yes I know I'm on a computer right now, but I've taken some steps to get us away from the computer's, video games and TV.

When we were in Oregon we stayed at a place that had no TV, no wifi, just a clock radio. It was only a week, but it was a great week. What I noticed was, my children interacted with us and each other more, there weren't any distractions, there wasn't any talk of news or Facebook or Youtube, it was all about what we had seen, school, friends, life in general. It was nice.

We weren't in our room a whole lot, but we didn't use Wifi or any other technology while we were visiting my Brother's homes or visiting places, we used a GPS and the kids did watch Spongebob once, but that was good for us.

I just felt better, so when we got home I made serious limits to how much time we spend on these devices. We don't have cable anymore, we do have Hulu and Netflix, but we hardly use them. Kids video games are limited and so is computer time. I make it a point to pull out family games and we've been going to the library more.

I've noticed a bit of a change, like I said we've all connected a bit more without those distractions. It's a much quieter house to.

I'm just wondering have you ever disconnected yourself to connect back to each other, the world, etc.

 

[sassylady]

Years ago my husband and I used to spend a week tent camping in northern Michigan a couple times a year. That was way before cell phones, etc, but it is amazing how you adjust to living out of a tent and cooking over a campfire. Was weird to walk back in our home and see walls and carpet. But it was actually a very relaxing week.

 

[BananaPie]

Well, we don't watch TV here at all. It's been years since satellite or cable has not been paid.
The seldom exposure we get to TV is when visiting family or a friend's house.

To curve the TV, the Teens are allowed to watch, on the weekends, family-friendly DVD we own only.

As for internet, the Teens get internet access only for academic work they need to turn it. They also get leisure time online: 2 hrs on Fridays and 2 hrs on Saturday. That's it.

My Moosey and I are online depending on what's going on with Fox News or here on CC. Recently, I've become interested in Pearl's Peril, an online game, but once Artemis Island is completed (that's where the game takes place), I'll retire online game activity.

 

[tourist]

I generally don't watch TV as I prefer reading or having an actual conversation. I don't have a smart phone or Ipad either as I try to limit my exposure to the outside world to that what is necessary. The only time that I am on-line is when I am on CC but I am going to try to limit that as well. The thing is that I enjoy interacting with the many fascinating and amusing residents residing here. I don't consider anyone here to be virtual but rather they are very real to me. The most real person for me is the woman that I am going to marry that I met on this site. For that I am most grateful and feel that I am truly blessed by God. She is the most fascinating and interesting person that I know. She is certainly the most spiritual and has a deep love in her heart for the Lord that I find most attractive.

 

[Oncefallen]

Fenner and Nanners, I applaud you ladies for pulling the plug. Although I'm sure some of your kids friends think you ladies are some sort of terrible ogres for not allowing your kids to melt their brains you really are helping your little ones brain development.

I grew up in a home with no TV and entered middle school reading at a college freshmen level because I read instead of melting my brain in front of the one eyed babysitter.

 

[Lynx]

What Oncefallen said. I'm glad I'm not the only one who was at college reading level in middle school. We had no TV when I was a kid and I think my brain is better for it.

On the downside, many have mentioned "Isaac and his triple-jointed words" because I use words larger than three syllables. Folks 'round here ain't got no vocab...

 

[Lynx]

Talking about disconnecting to reconnect though:

When my parents divorced I went back to east TN with my mother. When I grew up I played video games... like, a lot... like, all the time, because I had no real life. My mother's side of the family doesn't interact a lot, I didn't go to church and TV was boring, so I played games to pass the time.

When I moved back down here where I belong, this became a problem. My father's side of the family likes to get together a lot. I started going to church, started getting into church stuff... but I still played video games every spare minute I could get. When I was at work I would still be thinking about whatever game I was on. At church I would go through the motions but in my mind I was still trying to figure out how to beat that next boss moster or whatever.

I'm not saying video games are eeeeeeevil... but for me, what was a necessary time filler had become an obstruction. So I got rid of my Playstation 2 (yeah, it was that long ago) and rejoined the real world.

After a few years I started playing video games again, but not like before. I don't have a game console, don't have a library of game disks. I play freeware games, and there are some surprisingly good free ones out there. But it's not my life anymore.

 

[Stephen63]

Well, we don't watch TV here at all. It's been years since satellite or cable has not been paid. The seldom exposure we get to TV is when visiting family or a friend's house.

To curve the TV, the Teens are allowed to watch family-friendly DVD we own on the weekends only.

As for internet, the Teens get internet access only for academic work they need to turn it. They also get leisure time online: 2 hrs on Fridays and 2 hrs on Saturday. That's it.

My Moosey and I are online depending on what's going on with Fox News or here on CC.

Fox News? It's high time for you to disconnect, LOL!

 

[BananaPie]

...because I use words larger than three syllables. Folks 'round here ain't got no vocab...

How fortunate to encounter cultured premillennarian abecedarians.

 

[MissCris]

I grew up without much tv, for the most part- there was a LOT of television watched when my dad was still around (I had a pretty early introduction to Back to the Future, Ghost Busters, Bill and Ted, Ninja Turtles...yeah), but after my parents divorced, the only times I really remember the TV being on was if my mom was watching the news (or the OJ Simpson trial) or if we were lucky enough to rent a movie on the weekend.
We didn't have a computer at all until I was 13, and then for a long time, no internet.
We had family dinners- all five of us, sitting together, talking.
We spent a lot of time reading.
We were outside a lot.

Fast forward to being married...my husband was raised with TV on constantly. Music channels for background noise (I was like WHAT? Background noise is cars going by or birds chirping...but ok...), TV on during dinner, TV on from sun up to sun down and then some.
And the internet! For a long time, both of us would just tune out, sitting in front of our separate computers, playing games (not together), in different rooms, ignoring each other.
And then came fancy phones and iPads...so many ways to be in the same house and not have to speak to each other.

Since I've been back, we've cut down on "technology time" immensely. The kids get to watch three shows- two in the morning on PBS, one in the afternoon. They're interactive, learning shows. The TV is off the rest of the time, except when my husband gets home and watches the news- then it's off until after the kids go to bed and we want to watch one of the few shows we both like and have recorded.

It makes a lot of difference, how much more we communicate, when our noses aren't glued to a screen.

 

[gypsygirl]

"disconnecting" is actually quite easy for me. really.

i don't really watch much tv, save for the occasional documentary/nonfiction, educational, or movie. really. largely, because i don't have the patience for much unless i am watching it with someone, and then it is really more of a social activity. instead, i prefer to listen to music -- the majority of the time, and also love listening to sermons and bible teaching.

almost 5 years ago, my cell phone broke, and i didn't replace it for well over a year. it was lovely. it reminded me of the pleasure of making it less convenient for people to get a hold of me. and how much i enjoy my activities untethered to some electronic leash.

even now, when i go places, my smart phone is stowed someplace un-handy, so that i can enjoy walking through the store, with a smile on my face and without distraction. i have had some really fascinating and educational conversations with my produce guy at the grocery store.

oh, and i don't have any video games. don't hate me, but i sort of prefer the actual adventure to the simulated, virtual one.

seriously, perhaps my two super powers are: relaxation (i.e. especially away from technology) and living in the moment, so much so that i have five, yes FIVE alarms to ensure that i get to church/worship team warm-up in time.

that said, it's much easier to surrender it all when you've elected to to do so. not that long ago, i spent like, a weekend with the internet down. it was entirely infuriating. : D

 

[BananaPie]

I hear ya. My parents didn't allow TV in the house except for Saturday mornings when all the cartoons & The Brady Bunch were on. Then on Saturday evenings, we were allowed to watch The Donny & Marie Show.

My parents watched The Lawrence Welk Show and The Andy Williams Show on the weekdays, which we kids got to hear from our bedrooms as we'd fall asleep.

The rest of the time (all my teen years) I spent reading the volumes of the Encyclopedia Britannica in English, and the 14 volumes of Enciclopedia Monitor Salvat in Spanish.

Another quirk to eat-up time involved reading the Spanish dictionary, since English is my first language. Here's the Spanish dictionary I read entry-by-entry, page-by-page; El Pequeño Larousse, which is about 3 inches thick and about 8 inches tall.

My trig book in Spanish.

My algebra book in Spanish.

My Algebra & Trig in English.

The calculus book in Spanish during High School.

My calculus book in English during college.

My Physics book in English.

...and there was also the blessed "Casio Solar Scientific Calculator" to mess with instead of playiing games on an iPad.

...and The Holy Bible was read in Spanish. I also went rollerskating on the Saturdays I didn't work as a gift-wrapper at a Dept. Store. That's how I spent, pretty much, the bulk of my teen years.

I still have all these books except for the encyclopedias.

 

[tourist]

Fox News? It's high time for you to disconnect, LOL!

Fox News is the only major media news outlet where you get the full story. It is the no-spin zone.

 

[tourist]

I hear ya. My parents didn't allow TV in the house except for Saturday mornings when all the cartoons & The Brady Bunch were on. Then on Saturday evenings, we were allowed to watch The Donny & Marie Show.

My parents watched The Lawrence Welk Show and The Andy Williams Show on the weekdays, which we kids got to hear from our bedrooms as we'd fall asleep.

The rest of the time (all my teen years) I spent reading the volumes of the Encyclopedia Britannica in English, and the 14 volumes of Enciclopedea Monitor Salvat in Spanish.

Another quirk to eat-up time involved reading the Spanish dictionary, since English is my first language. Here's the Spanish dictionary I read entry-by-entry, page-by-page; El Pequeño Larousse, which is about 3 inches thick and about 8 inches tall.

My trig book in Spanish.

My algebra book in Spanish.

My Algebra & Trig in English.

The calculus book in Spanish during High School.

My calculus book in English during college.

My Physics book in English.

...and there was also the blessed "Casio Solar Scientific Calculator" to mess with instead of playiing games on an iPad.

...and The Holy Bible was read in Spanish. I also went rollerskating on the Saturdays I didn't work as a gift-wrapper at a Dept. Store. That's how I spent, pretty much, the bulk of my teen years.

I still have all these books except for the encyclopedias.

I am most impressed. I have read over 1000 books in my life, all of which were written in English. In 10th grade I studied French but I was not focused and didn't apply myself to my studies. I got a 'D'. Oui.

 

[Stephen63]

Fox News is the only major media news outlet where you get the full story. It is the no-spin zone.

Yeeeah, riiight..... They're the one that uses spinning wheels to try to spin gold outta manure.

 

[MissCris]

If this thread is going to be derailed by an argument, couldn't we at least argue about something important, like...

Chocolate vs. vanilla icecream, or which way the toilet paper goes on the holder...?

 

[seoulsearch]

I think it's a wonderful idea to disconnect at times!

I just wanted to give a different spin on this thread though... just a slightly different perspective. Although I don't watch much TV and don't have a web-capable phone, when I am home I almost always have my computer fired up and online. It's my "companion", so to speak.

I know most would say this isn't safe to admit online, but I have lived alone for 11 years, and state this publicly because I have several neighbors around me who are always at home and are instructed to call the police at any sign of mishap (and, being older folk, they most certainly will.) A lot of people don't know what it's like to be completely by yourself for that long--not kids, pets, roommates, or relatives. Most would say it would be heavenly and I agree, it can be... but the thing is, you have to actually try it for that long to know.

It's quite an experience to have no other human beings in your proximity every single day for over a decade except for work and church activities. The problem for me is that when I'm around other people, they either want me to do something for them or want me to listen to them. That's why I "talk" so much here, whether in chat or in writing--because it's the only time I'm not talking to someone who automatically dismisses everything I say and directs the focus back on them. Because of this, I often find myself retreating from people in everyday life when I can.

If not for the internet I would feel completely alone the entire time I'm at home. Sure, I talk to God, but I love the internet because it's an online library of information and I love the forums here because to me, seeing replies to threads is like having someone "talk back" to me. Otherwise, after all these years, you get thoughts in your head such as, "I have the next two days off. If I die tonight, no one would come looking for me until I didn't show up next week, and if they didn't really need me that day, they'd wait until they needed me to do something for them so much that they'd actually come looking.

I knew a wonderful Christian man whose wife suffered from severe depression and took her own life when he was only 28 years old. He would have loved to have remarried but for whatever reason, God never sent him another wife (though it's not too late now, but he's almost 70 and has spent this entire time alone.) He told me that after she died, the only companions he had was his work and the TV. He had it on 24/7 in his house not to watch it, but to fill the silence of not having another human being in the house. I very much understand how he feels.

Sure, being plugged in can be a brain drain and distraction from more important things.

But for some of us, it's also the only companions God has supplied us with.

 

[Fenner]

Like Miss Criss husband, I was a TV kid. Watched Captian Kangaroo before school, after school whatever was on. My parents had had a TV in the kitchen, living room, family room, and their bedroom, it was on all the time. We had Atari, we didn't have internet then, Al Gore didn't invent it yet, Banana Pie will get that, especially if she watches Fox news.

We had over 100 channels until just a few weeks ago, most of them were shopping networks and reality. Not even worth a dime. I feel free of it, the bill, the horrible programming and my kids exposure to the garbage. It's just not worth it.

 

[Lynx]

If this thread is going to be derailed by an argument, couldn't we at least argue about something important, like...

Chocolate vs. vanilla icecream, or which way the toilet paper goes on the holder...?

DOGHOUSE | What Your Toilet Paper Says About You

 

[Fenner]

I think it's a wonderful idea to disconnect at times!

I just wanted to give a different spin on this thread though... just a slightly different perspective. Although I don't watch much TV and don't have a web-capable phone, when I am home I almost always have my computer fired up and online. It's my "companion", so to speak.

I know most would say this isn't safe to admit online, but I have lived alone for 11 years, and state this publicly because I have several neighbors around me who are always at home and are instructed to call the police at any sign of mishap (and, being older folk, they most certainly will.) A lot of people don't know what it's like to be completely by yourself for that long--not kids, pets, roommates, or relatives. Most would say it would be heavenly and I agree, it can be... but the thing is, you have to actually try it for that long to know.

It's quite an experience to have no other human beings in your proximity every single day for over a decade except for work and church activities. The problem for me is that when I'm around other people, they either want me to do something for them or want me to listen to them. That's why I "talk" so much here, whether in chat or in writing--because it's the only time I'm not talking to someone who automatically dismisses everything I say and directs the focus back on them. Because of this, I often find myself retreating from people in everyday life when I can.

If not for the internet I would feel completely alone the entire time I'm at home. Sure, I talk to God, but I love the internet because it's an online library of information and I love the forums here because to me, seeing replies to threads is like having someone "talk back" to me. Otherwise, after all these years, you get thoughts in your head such as, "I have the next two days off. If I die tonight, no one would come looking for me until I didn't show up next week, and if they didn't really need me that day, they'd wait until they needed me to do something for them so much that they'd actually come looking.

I knew a wonderful Christian man whose wife suffered from severe depression and took her own life when he was only 28 years old. He would have loved to have remarried but for whatever reason, God never sent him another wife (though it's not too late now, but he's almost 70 and has spent this entire time alone.) He told me that after she died, the only companions he had was his work and the TV. He had it on 24/7 in his house not to watch it, but to fill the silence of not having another human being in the house. I very much understand how he feels.

Sure, being plugged in can be a brain drain and distraction from more important things.

But for some of us, it's also the only companions God has supplied us with.

I totally understand and I've been there. Sometimes I still am there, when I was home with my kids all day, Facebook and CC were good social outlets for me, still are. I don't think it's bad, just for us we were spending way to much time on them.