"Don't Judge Me! I Have a Perfectly Good Reason For ________________________________________________________ (finish this sentence!!)"

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Even bb, termagant though she may be, would be better than winston.
 
The Spaghetti Spoon

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One day, I had an itch on my back and I couldn't reach it. There wasn't anything close by to help me.

What can I use? .... I know! I went to the kitchen, reached into the utensils drawer and got the spaghetti spoon!

I went back to the living room and while watching TV on the sofa, I scratched the itch on my back to my hearts content!

Only I forgot about the spoon.... I remembered about later on, but didn't see it on the sofa. Where did I put it??? I'm kind of absent-minded, so I forgot about continuing to search for it!

A few weeks later....

My brother comes to me and says, "I found this. Why was the spaghetti spoon behind the sofa cushions???"

I laughed so hard! Because I couldn't answer his question and he had a funny, puzzled look on his face, like "What on earth could my sister be using a spaghetti spoon in the living room?!??"

I didn't tell anybody else about the Mysterious Case of the Spaghetti Spoon, but come that Christmas, we all got official back scratchers as stocking stuffer gifts from my Mom, lol! :ROFL::love::ROFL::giggle:


🚞


OH MY GOODNESS.

I was laughing so hard at this post that I was wheezing, just like Muttley!!! :ROFL::ROFL::ROFL:

I actually had to pause to take a breath!!!

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This reminded me of when someone I knew was moving and giving things away... including an unopened back scrubbing brush. I took it home to put in the shower -- but I wound up keeping it as a dry brush mostly for back scratching, just like what you described!!! :D

No one realizes what a REAL dilemma is is when you're by yourself and have an itch on your back that you just can't scratch!


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Thank you so much for sharing this hilarious story!!! You worded it so skillfully, I could just see the befuddled look on your brother's face when you couldn't explain!!! :D

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time -- thank you again! :D
 
It's awesome to see my fellow "Single But Buy In Bulk Believers!" emerge.

These posts bring up some great points -- buying in mass quantities is often cheaper and more convenient.

However...

For particularly delicious edibles, it does indeed pose the problem going overboard. I always find myself in a bind -- single serve or smaller amounts are less temptation, but usually cost several times more per ounce. I especially hate stores where it's "Buy 5, Get $5 Off" because in order to get the deal, you have to buy 5 usually very unhealthy things.

As much as I'd love to cart home 5 bags of chips and 5 cartons of ice cream, I would soon be the size of a house!

Even though I buy them in bulk, I’m not overly obsessed with nuggets, thus I probably eat maybe 12 a sitting and that is like once every other day or once every third day.

I buy them because they are some of the cheapest easily prepared meat I can make fast.

The only thing I was buying that was anything like a snack was cereal and I “stopped” eating cereal, though I did have a bowl of special K with yogurt and fruit last night.

@CarriePie influenced me to start eating oatmeal. So I started eating oatmeal in the mornings, instead of cereal. I’ve noticed a difference in how I feel and look and my mood has improved; though that could be the sun I finally walked in yesterday.
 
I just ordered and received this:


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And this a TWO-PACK for a total of 68 ounces! That is 4-1/4 POUNDS!

I'm trying to make this last for as long as possible One serving is 3 candies for a total of 70 calories but it's been very difficult just eating 3 candies a day! I just love the caramel flavor and smooth texture of these candies!

I have more things I love that make me scream "DON'T JUDGE ME!" I'll post them as they come to mind... :unsure::giggle:


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Where did you order that humongous bag - Costco?
 
Even though I buy them in bulk, I’m not overly obsessed with nuggets, thus I probably eat maybe 12 a sitting and that is like once every other day or once every third day.

I buy them because they are some of the cheapest easily prepared meat I can make fast.

The only thing I was buying that was anything like a snack was cereal and I “stopped” eating cereal, though I did have a bowl of special K with yogurt and fruit last night.

@CarriePie influenced me to start eating oatmeal. So I started eating oatmeal in the mornings, instead of cereal. I’ve noticed a difference in how I feel and look and my mood has improved; though that could be the sun I finally walked in yesterday.
I eat Special K too. Unfortunately, the only size that Walmart had was this giant family size. Oh well, if it goes stale I can feed the flakes to the birds.
 
I have enough toilet paper to probably last the rest of my life, and there will still be enough left for each of the 4 kids to inherit a fair amount. When my kids were growing up in the wilds of Alaska, I had a custom built home with massive amounts of storage space. I would buy massive amounts of things we used when there was an especially good sale on them. In that way I ended up with a lot of rolls of toilet paper in the bank, so to speak. With a family of six we went through those rolls pretty quickly. Then COVID came along and I didn't understand the fuss about toilet paper since I didn't need to buy any that whole time. When it became common again and prices were reasonable I stocked up. Turns out I didn't need to stock up because we still had a lot left. The kids grew up and moved out and now it's just the wife and I and we don't go through those rolls near as fast now. If I were to live another 25 years I'd probably still have plenty left. I can pretty much guarantee that the Rapture will occur before I run out of toilet paper... Well... that's one item I don't have to worry about running out of.

Judge me if you will, but if you ever visit you won't have to bring your own.
datzphunnneee!
 
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.......telling a white lie"... because you can't talk about grandparents in front of her because she never had any & she gets quit teary eyed when the subject arises.
 
I eat Special K too. Unfortunately, the only size that Walmart had was this giant family size. Oh well, if it goes stale I can feed the flakes to the birds.

if they expire here, we just throw them out. My mother has a habit of holding onto expired items, whether that is food, hygiene and beauty products and I on the other hand got fed up with that and now just throw anything expired out.

good idea on where to let them go if they get stale though. We have birds in our backyard every morning that I could probably feed them to but probably won’t. That is something I’d leave up to @CarriePie if we moved our relationship forward and lived together but we both aren’t ready for that.
 
if they expire here, we just throw them out. My mother has a habit of holding onto expired items, whether that is food, hygiene and beauty products and I on the other hand got fed up with that and now just throw anything expired out.

good idea on where to let them go if they get stale though. We have birds in our backyard every morning that I could probably feed them to but probably won’t. That is something I’d leave up to @CarriePie if we moved our relationship forward and lived together but we both aren’t ready for that.
@CarriePie is a fave peep of mine for sure.
 
Apart from drinking too much bourbon and smoking too many cigarettes I’m pretty flawless and can proudly report a negative on your question, @seoulsearch .😊
 
@CarriePie is a fave peep of mine for sure.

She is a great human being. I’m honestly surprised she puts up with most of my character flaws.

Thank y'all for warming my heart. It'll be a smashing week ahead now for sure!


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To answer the thread, I thought about it and then I remembered an occurrence. A few months before dad passed away, he collapsed in the yard. He was not responsive, so I called 911. Firemen showed up and by then he had came too. He didn't want to go to ER, so they helped him inside. They were inside for a while helping him to bed. I stayed outside with the fire chief. When they all left and I came inside, I looked around and realized that they must have noticed that we had a lot of oats and firearms. I visualized a scene of the firemen talking as they were driving away, "Did you see all the oats and firearms in those folks have?" 😂
 
Thank y'all for warming my heart. It'll be a smashing week ahead now for sure!


---

To answer the thread, I thought about it and then I remembered an occurrence. A few months before dad passed away, he collapsed in the yard. He was not responsive, so I called 911. Firemen showed up and by then he had came too. He didn't want to go to ER, so they helped him inside. They were inside for a while helping him to bed. I stayed outside with the fire chief. When they all left and I came inside, I looked around and realized that they must have noticed that we had a lot of oats and firearms. I visualized a scene of the firemen talking as they were driving away, "Did you see all the oats and firearms in those folks have?" 😂

Now I eat oats.

I heard from someone here that they cause his blood sugar to spike big time, so it might not be the best option for me to eat them.

I know cooking eggs is always a great option but the work it involves. I just got to not be lazy and just cook them.
 
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Now I eat oats.

I heard from someone here that they cause his blood sugar to spike big time, so it might not be the best option for me to eat them.

I know cooking eggs is always a great option but the work it involves. I just got to not be lazy and just cook them.


I've been eating them almost every morning for 10 years. Sometimes I even eat them for supper too. Good thing they don't bother me, I like having a heart healthy breakfast. I'm thankful the Lord created foods such as oats.

Everyone is different, of course. May we all find what suits us best for each our own unique health needs.

Speaking of eggs, I really enjoy oats and eggs cooked together with seasonings lol. Yes, I'll put oats in everything!
 
Now I eat oats.

I heard from someone here that they cause his blood sugar to spike big time, so it might not be the best option for me to eat them.

I know cooking eggs is always a great option but the work it involves. I just got to not be lazy and just cook them.
I actually cook a breakfast once a week -, omelet, hash browns, bacon, buttered toast with jam, and OJ. The thing is, I always do this in the afternoon and not morning. Regarding the work, that it why I usually just nuke a Jimmy Dean breakfast bowl. I make the toast though. Yeah, and pour the OJ. Love breakfast foods. Any time day or night.
 
I actually cook a breakfast once a week -, omelet, hash browns, bacon, buttered toast with jam, and OJ. The thing is, I always do this in the afternoon and not morning. Regarding the work, that it why I usually just nuke a Jimmy Dean breakfast bowl. I make the toast though. Yeah, and pour the OJ. Love breakfast foods. Any time day or night.

Hey, at least you are cooking. I think I should start cooking more, rather than just nuking things. I get home cooked meals a lot of the time but i miss cooking steak for myself and the fam.

I’m craving French toast right now.
 
Breakfast any time of the day is smashing. I eat oatmeal in the morning, but sometimes I have breakfast foods for lunch or supper.

I'm particularly fond of homemade biscuits & gravy.

Homemade French toast is also appealing.

Thanks for making me hungry, y'all!

At least it's for something besides ice cream 😄