Just got dumped

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That is very sad.

There is soooooo much more to life than finding "true love." Just all kinds of things you are missing while you wait for and chase something you may never get.

And if you do find a guy, that's a heavy load to put on him. You will be making him responsible for not only your happiness but your very reason to live. No man can take that kind of expectation. Either he'll leave or you'll crush him.
You got that right, too much pressure for any human being.
 
I'm kind of done reading people just tell me to enjoy life because I should, and I'm ungrateful if I hate being alive.
You are ungrateful and selfish.

As pertains to this thread,the same thing. You're ungrateful we bothered to reply. And that's selfish.

In the time it took me to write that rebuke, countless people died.

Some,never seeing it coming. Car accident,murder.

Others died slowly. Cancer,chronic disease.

Every one of those would give anything for a bit more time here. To fo what they didn't do, put off, denied themselves worthy of,etc...

Here you are,wishing you were dead.

If you were this maudlin in your relationship,how are you surprised someone had enough and left?

I've been at the bedside of enough terminally I'll people to really see how precious life is. How sad they are with their head on that pillow,as the last comfort their head will feel,letting them to gaze at a bedroom ceiling as the last place they will ever see. Because they were in Hospice at home.
And too weak to even be wheeled out to the patio so to gaze at the trees, rose bushes, and birds feeding at the feeders they lived to collect just to watch birds find happiness in a full belly.

They mourned leaving this life for the heartbreak it will cause loved ones.
Heaven is promised,while heartbreak is assured.

And here you are,after all these pages of empathy from people who cared enough to reply to your OP,finally telling all of us, you'd rather die.

And you criticize us for sharing advice outside of that?

Selfish and ungrateful.
 
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My husband would not be my only reason to live, but give me time for my other reasons to live, Friends and hobbies and a passion project




Summary of all my feelings

I hate life. It is not fun for me.
If I get a husband that could support me and let me stay at home, my life would be saved and I will be happy.
But I don't need to be happy to keep living

I want God to tell or show me that my life, no matter how good or bad, is doing good for the Kingdom.
But I feel like he doesn't want to do that, even though he could without any effort.

If I have to be working for the rest of my life, or the majority of my life, it's not worth it to me unless it is for the good of the kingdom.

If that makes me ungreatful or a bad person, then I am a bad person, and I should die anyway.

That's all.
Wait... You don't want to raise a family?

Like... You just want a husband so you can loaf around for your whole life?
 
You are ungrateful and selfish.

As pertains to this thread,the same thing. You're ungrateful we bothered to reply. And that's selfish.

In the time it took me to write that rebuke, countless people died.

Some,never seeing it coming. Car accident,murder.

Others died slowly. Cancer,chronic disease.

Every one of those would give anything for a bit more time here. To fo what they didn't do, put off, denied themselves worthy of,etc...

Here you are,wishing you were dead.

If you were this maudlin in your relationship,how are you surprised someone had enough and left?

I've been at the bedside of enough terminally I'll people to really see how precious life is. How sad they are with their head on that pillow,as the last comfort their head will feel,letting them to gaze at a bedroom ceiling as the last place they will ever see. Because they were in Hospice at home.
And too weak to even be wheeled out to the patio so to gaze at the trees, rose bushes, and birds feeding at the feeders they lived to collect just to watch birds find happiness in a full belly.

They mourned leaving this life for the heartbreak it will cause loved ones.
Heaven is promised,while heartbreak is assured.

And here you are,after all these pages of empathy from people who cared enough to reply to your OP,finally telling all of us, you'd rather die.

And you criticize us for sharing advice outside of that?

Selfish and ungrateful.
I would rather be a cancer patient or be a victim in an accident to give someone else my life
 
If I die God will give someone else my purpose. Knowing i'm a selfish, and ungreatful and a "loaf" and I'm not allowed to feel sad on the worst day of my life. That since I have wanted to die since I was eight that means I was born a monster. God will give someone else my purpose. Someone he loves. I'm going to do it. Next time someone comes to this forum with a mental health issue I hope everyone here is a lot more empathetic. For some people, breathing is painful. I don't really know why. But I cant love a God who decided to make 8 year old me, miserable forever. I know this just makes you all have an even worse impression of me but whatever. I just hope that in the future you receive others with a lot more empathy.

Some of you were very kind and made me feel better, but the overwhelming consensus is that I would make a bad partner and that I am a bad person. So bye. No need to reply because I wont say anything
 
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Hi, @SadGotDumped!

I'm sorry. These things always hurt. This is a good and heartfelt desire, and it's always painful when these don't work out. And it definitely hurts if the relationship was long and substantive. That's normal. There's definitely something unique and special about romantic love that makes these things hurt in a particularly painful way when it doesn't work out.

First, know that these feelings are all normal, and give yourself permission to feel these things. It's like the stages of grief. These things take time to grieve, process, and move on from. You risked your heart, shared a life, dreamed dreams together, made memories together, and then it all fell apart and now you have to start over. It's OK to cry and grieve, and to acknowledge the pain. You probably should. Everything is not okay, and you’re still a human being with an aching heart. God gave us emotions, and we can't control when we feel these or which ones.

Dating is all about finding who to marry, and marriage is about living the Christian life together. If the relationship didn’t work out, it happens. It just means you didn’t find each other to be a good fit for whatever reason. It's important to nail down those particular reasons, so you have a better perspective going into the next relationship.

If you do have any friends or family you can count on, do spend time with them and lean on them. And even Jesus turned to God when he was crushed with sadness.

Also, if your family is abusive, are there any boundaries you can set with them?
 
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Some of you were very kind and made me feel better, but the overwhelming consensus is that I would make a bad partner and that I am a bad person. So bye. No need to reply because I wont say anything
I never said that. I just said that's a heavy load to put on a guy.

If you get married for the reason you stated, it will fail. I have seen it a lot, and it always fails. If you want to try it anyway go ahead, but I guarantee you will not like the result.
 
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Honestly yeah, I would consider marrying a rich 100 year old on a death bed if God didn't exist. Why not?
Go back and listen to how she ended up in spite of being a playboy porn wife of a billionaire. The best that the Devil will give a woman is a bunch of diseases, addictions and homeless.
Even rich supermodels are miserable. Worse than trad wives who are poor.

It's not wrong to want to be a homemaker. That's a healthier lifestyle than most modern marriages, which end in unfaithfulness and divorce.

If you want the best God has for you in other areas of life like a decent man, you have to apply the answer to that first question.
But it seems so stupid. Like God is simply the good things that happen in life. Just because good things happen in my life I'm supposed to believe in God. What if I apply this to anyone else? Jim Carrey loves me because I have food, clothing and shelter. Literally what is the difference?

I had faith. I begged for help. I thought I would recieve it, and it never came.

Thank you for the Bible verses
You are welcome.
I'm glad that you begged for faith. ❤️
It's a willing decision after hearing the facts.
That's why it's important to bookmark and read the Gospel of John < and pray before each chapter. Be patient because "faith cometh by hearing and hearing by the word of God."
Again why is Thomas important enough or loved enough to receive the proof he requested by not me?
What did Jesus say to him?
28And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God.
29Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.


Blessed or happy are those of us who believe His Word about Him, trusting what He promised, He will provide. People lie, but Jesus never sinned or lied. He promised to save us when we believe in Him, calling upon Him for His gift of salvation.
John 3:16

In your other post to me, you mentioned that you didn't understand what he was saying.
I will post links to 2 more pastors who slow down and make the gospel clearer. Sorry the other preacher spoke so fast it is hard to follow. Thanks for letting me know. Let me know about these.

Bible Way to Heaven

Gospel in 4 Minutes
 
God is pretty much hiding from me. I feel gaslighted and maipulated. Every good thing in my life is from God, but every bad thing isn't.

If God is hiding from you, there is good reason. Pride can take many forms, one of which is disobedience.

1 Peter 5:5 KJVS
Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth(opposes) the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.
 
I just feel like, when I read the bible I get nothing, so I stop reading it. Why should I have to read a book, be patient, and wait weeks for my friend to "reveal his plan". What kind of friend is that? I can text or call all my other friends when I have an emergency. Why can't I do that with him?
Upon salvation Christians are (or hopefully) indwelt with the Holy Spirit. Some traits of the Holy Spirit are: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Also, the Holy Spirit reveals truths to us bc He knows all. Notice patience as opposed to impatience and self-control as opposed to lack of restraint.
After reading only some of the comments my kind advice would be to get over the pity party. I just had a sm group friend ask for prayers for her daughter going into surgery tomorrow bc her spine is deteriorating. They may have to put a cage around her spine and she may wind up paralyzed.
You're thinking of suicide bc you didn't get your way, is that correct? The girl above would give anything for a healthy body.
By 20yo if you don't have a direction in life of what you want to do as in a vocation then I can see why you're frustrated and blaming God that some guy, possibly Christian?, didn't work out.
Did you ask God about going with the guy in the first place, obviously not. So if you want to, ask God for forgiveness and ask Him to give you direction. He does answer but sometimes we don't want to hear the truth. God bless🙏
 
That's tough, im sorry to hear you're in such an emotionally difficult situation. Something that has helped me is the simple reminder "I may be lonely but I am never alone." God is always with us. I pray you can seek God during this season and find comfort in the fact he has a plan for you, and its the best possible plan. We just have to have faith in him.
perhaps seeking a pastor who is an expert in relationships will assist blessings to you
 
You are only 20 years old.

You have plenty of time for God to bring the perfect mate to you.

I got saved as a teenager.

My first wife when I was in my 20s cheated on me repeatedly. I divorced her. My world was turned upside down and I hated the very words “marriage”, “wedding”, and “wife” for decades. My misadventures in backsliding and fornication began, which I regret.

Then, at age 50, sick and tired of sinning and dating unsaved women, I finally turned to God and said, “Lord, I need a wife”.

Two years later, God brought the perfect wife to me. I was made a Sunday school teacher and she was assigned to be my assistant. We fell in love quickly and got married.

21 years of bliss. Then, two years ago, she died. My godly, intelligent, thoroughly Christian wife. We were truly one flesh.

I am devastated by grief, disoriented by lack of sweet companionship. But now it’s just me and Jesus. He will carry me through this valley of the shadow of death.

I pray for you, my sister. You have youth as a super power. You have much to hope for. My only hope now is going to heaven.

Thank you very much for sharing your testimony -- I bookmarked it to remind me that nothing (such as having a spouse or outliving them) is promised in this life.

I am truly sorry for your loss. :(

Your story is an important reminder to other singles here who also wonder if we've come to a place in life where God is our only hope, and going to heaven is all we have to look forward to.

May God comfort and bless you. 🙏🏼
 
If I die God will give someone else my purpose. Knowing i'm a selfish, and ungreatful and a "loaf" and I'm not allowed to feel sad on the worst day of my life. That since I have wanted to die since I was eight that means I was born a monster. God will give someone else my purpose. Someone he loves. I'm going to do it. Next time someone comes to this forum with a mental health issue I hope everyone here is a lot more empathetic. For some people, breathing is painful. I don't really know why. But I cant love a God who decided to make 8 year old me, miserable forever. I know this just makes you all have an even worse impression of me but whatever. I just hope that in the future you receive others with a lot more empathy.

Some of you were very kind and made me feel better, but the overwhelming consensus is that I would make a bad partner and that I am a bad person. So bye. No need to reply because I wont say anything

The short video about Anna Smith was a friendly warning to remind us that sin is appealing, but we need to see the consequences of temptations. God has positive things for those who choose Him .
The videos that followed were to show His grace over judgement.
Please focus on those instead.

Relationships are a tricky thing. Sometimes we tend to get emotionally triggered by the emotional feelings we recall from years past. Then express those in ways that might not be helpful. When I went through numerous physical and emotional traumatic experiences the last few years, some people didn't want to be around me.
I nearly died from numerous harmful things against me, but God showed mercy.
At times I reacted to the suffering and loss of sleep. It's still a struggle that is improving slowly. People here know how MDs killed my parents and grandparents . My family was slaughtered at the hands of those who were entrusted and the pain of having evil creatures attack and take those we love most is a challenge.

I'm not here to judge you. It's hard to express both empathy and come across properly in written form. I have been in your shoes and know what you are going through. It's not a light thing. What I want to show is even bigger than the problem of relationships.
Believe it or not, that's where God's direction, help, mercy and answers to prayer begins.

Jesus explained a man who went away justified, Luke 18 if I remember right. When he humbled himself he said, "Lord be merciful to me a sinner."
God heard his prayer.
Then Jesus explained to Peter about the torture and death He was going to experience for all of our sins. Please go back and listen to the two brief videos I shared yesterday, keeping this in mind. Then let me know if you have any questions.

Hope you have a better day.
 
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I wasn't going to respond again but maybe OP anger is misdirected at God instead of her ex for leading her on, and herself for being foolish --but she's only in her 20s and may not know much about life or what marriage really entails.

I don't think God is to blame for our circumstances we find ourselves in or our attitudes toward life.

For anyone who's been dumped and feels that its God's fault they are feeling miserable I suggest (in the kindest way) cry yourself a river, build yourself a bridge, and get over it.

Also, listening to Gloria Gaynor's 'I will survive' may help.
She is a Christian, and there are many testimonies that song helped many people face life, get up and move on to something better.
 
Hello my sister, I’m still kinda new here but as I read your postings I get.. I’ve been there myself when it seems like God has gone completely silent. At that time I didn’t understand why but as I continued to pray and read and tightly hold His hand I realized that silence doesn’t mean He’s silent… You’re going to have to keep walking and take note of the way He’s speaking to you in the little things.. Also remember to pray the scriptures like in the Psalms.. Remember David knew how it feels to be alone when God goes silent.. Psalm 23 The Good Shepherd never leaves the sheep 🐑…Blessings
 
I've had just about the very same problem. Fell deeply in love with two people I was simply discarded by.
For a long Time I've wondered if God hated me because of those things.
Then I turned for Him, I looked for Him with all my soul, and I found Him. He became my Love. I will never forsake Him.
 
If I die God will give someone else my purpose. Knowing i'm a selfish, and ungreatful and a "loaf" and I'm not allowed to feel sad on the worst day of my life. That since I have wanted to die since I was eight that means I was born a monster. God will give someone else my purpose. Someone he loves. I'm going to do it. Next time someone comes to this forum with a mental health issue I hope everyone here is a lot more empathetic. For some people, breathing is painful. I don't really know why. But I cant love a God who decided to make 8 year old me, miserable forever. I know this just makes you all have an even worse impression of me but whatever. I just hope that in the future you receive others with a lot more empathy.

Some of you were very kind and made me feel better, but the overwhelming consensus is that I would make a bad partner and that I am a bad person. So bye. No need to reply because I wont say anything
Look at Jacob. He needed to work 7 years to marry his bride, and then another 7 because he was tricked and was given the wrong one. God tends to work to mend the broken, rather than throw them out and find another. This phase of your life will pass - you just need to trust God and be patient - and don't wish away the gift God has given you.