sex before marriage?

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sex b4 marriage

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I am speaking as a non-Christian. But what amazes me is that many Christians seem to skip over this rule in the Bible yet judge other people for not following the Bible. I don't understand how people can pick and choose what they believe of their holy book.
 
tif said:
We could get into all kinds of debates about this. But I think it really comes down to two questions:

1) Would God's perfect choice for your life be a complete sexual mismatch?

2) If you are head-over-heels for someone (as you ought to be for your hubby/wife), isn't that the best aphrodisiac of all?
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1. Who knows I would hope not, it would be pretty disappointing.

2. You would be surprised, not to mention in appropriate terms the wide variety of things available to a husband and wife to explore together. Everyone has different...inclinations.

Also, just to clarify this is coming from the opinions of someone who is not a virgin and did lots of things before getting saved.
 
I'm just going to be blunt on my opinion with this. And please, don't think I'm talking to anyone specific besides myself (I am not a virgin either, and this is something I've thought a lot about).

I believe that, if (as Christians) we let God direct our path, He won't lead us into a den of snakes.

I believe that God has a better plan for my life than I could ever dream up on my own.

I believe that God has taken an interest in me and cares about what happens to me.

I believe that the things I have gone through have prepared me for a closer walk with Him.


Take those four things alone. Assume they're fact. Well, when I find someone, why would I assume that the God who leads me near the still waters and snuffs out my fear in the valley of the shadow of death would give me a dud? Why would I presume to test my husband out sexually, "just in case"?

If I don't trust God with this one relationship, can I say I trust him at all for the rest of it? What if He leads me to another job? What if His plan involved a 5000 mile relocation and abject poverty? What if God's plan for me seemed terrifying, ludicrous, "the valley of the shadow of death" -ish? Would I still follow, if I can't trust God in this thing?

Even worse, what if I DIDN'T follow God through everything?

That's what I did when I got together with my ex-fiance. We were planning a wedding when we split. I spent seven years with someone, invested time, love, myself, and what do I have to show for that? I knew he wasn't God's choice for me.

I'd rather have God's choice, God's way, than to take my own path down to destruction.
 
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sex is good but GOD design this for those married only and the bible says that reserve your body for your future partner only because it is the only gift you will be given to him or her.
 
yeah i know, i guess im just nervous about it. Ive met a lot of christian girls and eventually after dating a while the topic of sex would inevitably come up in conversations about our past and as we talked about it i could just see tell that things wouldnt work based on varying ideas about the subject and approaches to it. So no i dont recommend test driving as you so succintly put it earlier, but i am very very cautious when it comes to it. BUt the im cautious with a lot of things.
 
Megatron: I think it's good to be cautious. A lot of us aren't cautious enough nowadays. But we have to be careful not to take that to an extreme, to a place where we can't hear God's will for our lives anymore. In the end, no matter how cautious we are, we can't foresee the way God can.

That, and I think that, while sex is a beautiful thing to be shared between a husband and wife, it isn't the end-all-be-all of a relationship. There is a lot more to this love thing. There are some couples in this world who can't have sex the way most of us would think about it. Some people have paralysis, some people have illnesses or disabilities that don't allow for that kind of activity anymore... But they stay together with their spouses because marriage isn't just (or even mostly) about sex. Sex is a beautiful thing that two people bound to each other for this life share.

I don't know, I think I'd rather just be close with someone, intimate without sex, a lot of the time. There's a lot to be said for holding hands or cuddling or kissing.
 
Eeeniiieee meeeniiee minnneeeyyyyy moooowww Sex wiill make you a hoooooeee
 
I think what is important is not marriage itself, but what it represents. We accept sex after marriage because this ceremony represents a strong union and deep caring between two people. As long as this feeling exists, I don't see why sex would be a bad thing. Of course, promiscuity can bring very bad consequences, but just because someone has sex before marriage it doesn't mean he/she takes sex lightly (or thinks it's casual or un-meaningful for that matter). As long as the appropriate precautions are taken and a deep feeling supports the relationship, I don't see why sex should be a bad thing, even before marriage.
 
i think waiting is very important because it can be poison to a relationship if you dont. 1 you create a soul tie with that person which means you are connected to that person forever until that tie is broken that is why God intended for sex to be between husband and wife. 2 God will bless the sex when you get married. I know this couple who dated and had sex before marriage and then broke up because of it. They both got saved and repented three months later got married and they said when they had sex for the first time after marriage they said it was like they was both virgins and the best they had ever had. So waiting has its advantages.
 
I had this one but regret it..well I did not marry the guy..because he was already married and I didn't know that because he said he's single..I asks God forgiveness anyway..
 
I don't see how anyone voted anything but ''no'', because it clearly says not to have sex until you're married.
Wow.. I just don't get people sometimes...

Besides I think losing your virginity on your wedding night makes the day even more fun! :D
 
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Sex before marriage...why the rush to jump in the bed? Why not savior it like your favorite peace of candy. She/He is not going any-wear...if that's who God has plan for you.
 
I wish I hadn't so will go with a no. My priest said that if you imagine two pieces of cardboard being glued together (by sex) when you try and pull them apart you still leave bits of yourself on the other person. That is the hurt and disappointment that will still cling to you.
 
i say no it's not alright but have i had sex? yes and am i married? no . i made many mistakes and this is one of them and i actually have a daughter and im not married to her mother which is a shame on me :(
 
Sex before marriage is not a good idea. You can see what's happening to all these kids these days! Not only that, but God commands us not to do that. Marriage is sacred. If you believe in God, then you will believe and do what he tells you to do, and not to do. Doesn't matter what age you are, sex before marriage is wrong. By the way, life is not just about sex. And having sex before marriage doesn't guarantee you a "perfect life". In fact, some people feel bad about themselves after doing it. People wonder why they catch clamitia, std's, and aid's, relationship issues, or get pregnant for that matter. I think God not only wanted these things avoided, but marriage is supposed to be a pure thing. There's nothing pure about having sex before marriage.
 
MitchellJohnson said:
I think what is important is not marriage itself, but what it represents. We accept sex after marriage because this ceremony represents a strong union and deep caring between two people. As long as this feeling exists, I don't see why sex would be a bad thing. Of course, promiscuity can bring very bad consequences, but just because someone has sex before marriage it doesn't mean he/she takes sex lightly (or thinks it's casual or un-meaningful for that matter). As long as the appropriate precautions are taken and a deep feeling supports the relationship, I don't see why sex should be a bad thing, even before marriage.
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The thing is that we as Christians make a vow before God on our wedding days. It isn't just a "strong union and deep caring," though that is definitely part of it. It is the binding of two people before God.

And, as someone who used to hold the EXACT same view as you, I can honestly say it sucks. I was never a slut. I had two serious relationships that I believed would end in marriage, and I thought that was enough. I thought it didn't matter, as long as we were committed to each other and we loved each other and wanted to be together, because isn't that what marriage is...

Well, the first guy wasn't a Christian, and he ended up getting into a gang and doing heavy drugs and he's now having a pretty unhappy life with the girl he knocked up a few times.

The second guy and I were engaged, and I very much wish I had waited. I was really broken up for a long time after we split.

In the end, the short-term pleasure and intimacy premarital sex offers isn't worth the long-term guilt, resentment, and loss. Loss, in that I will never be able to have those firsts again in a loving relationship that doesn't end in heartbreak and bitter fighting.
 
where does the Bible say, "No sex before mariage"? What was marriage in the Bible? I thought it was just a "take her she's mine" thing.
 
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