How we each walk out the calling of our salvation is uniquely tailored to each person. Only God can see clearly at all times the beginning, and the end. In the meantime, we endure, as you say, as we live out the middle. You have a unique talent for sharing your heart, and are dearly loved for that quality. My blessing is perhaps not so obvious. You say you are non-confrontational, and yet I have seen you rise up like a bear to defend God's Word or a person suffering and in need. I get that being bearish it is not your normal mode, but still you are capable.
Renee, in my past life I went to great lengths to avoid confrontation. My life became so ensnared in sin and degenerated into addiction, alcoholism, drug overdoses, etc, because I felt so ill-equipped to deal with life on life's terms; I could not face the harsh realities of life, nor speak my truths for fear of hurting other people's feelings. Arriving at the brink of death repeatedly due to such an inability is no way to live life, ya know? In such a state, I realized eventually that due to constant fear of rejection and abandonment, I could not tell the truth if my life depended on it. Then I realized that my life did depend on my ability to tell the truth. Truth, Pilate asked. What is truth? The circumstances of our lives devoid of God's principles and Christ's love... what can or does it all mean aside from Him?
The search for meaning and purpose is ages old, but still, how are we to interpret all these things which go into the making of ourselves? I spent many years listening to people articulate their truths, their joys, their sorrows, their challenges, and their triumphs, and their understanding of God even as I was still in rebellion against Him, and running from Him, because listening helped me come to a better understanding and acceptance of myself. And then I finally surrendered my life to Christ. I do not speak of my profound experiences of God often, because they are my pearls, but these experiences initially helped me turn my life around, and then they ultimately turned it upside down, and completely transformed how I spend my time. I am am still not good with confrontation, but I am fierce in my defence of the Truth of God's Word, and count it a blessing that I have been graced with some measure of understanding, and I thank God for that, for all else pales in comparison to knowing Him.