See being born again is by the Spirit, Jesus stated that clearly, and its as uncontrollable as the wind Jn 3:3-8
3 Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.
4 Nicodemus saith unto him, How can a man be born when he is old? can he enter the second time into his mother's womb, and be born?
5 Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.
6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.
7 Marvel not that I said unto thee, Ye must be born again.
8 The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is every one that is born of the Spirit.
A man has no control over the workings of the wind. See when you and i were physically born by the will of God, we had no say so, our will wasnt consulted, it was not our choice on who our parents would be, what our ethnicity would be,what our sex would be, what time in world history we would be born, where we would be born,its all purposed by Gods will Ecc 3:2
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
Also being born again is imperceptible, do you remember when you were first conceived in your mother, that's when your life began ? Being born of the Spirit is something that occurs in our subconscious, its not some tangible substance that God brings to you and say, hey, im offering you to be born again, its up to you to accept it or reject it, that's probably how you think, judging from your posts.