Marriage...expensive or just the wedding?

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shittim

Senior Member
Dec 16, 2016
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you should get at least a dozen "winner" ribbon.
Our oath is made before G-d, not "in a church" or any building to be sanctified, that reference in this thread indicates a basic problem with genuine faith today. We don't become Christian by walking into a church, our marriage is not sanctified by being in a church, our lives are not sanctified by keeping up with the Jones and being an hour a week pew warmer.
blessings:)(y):unsure:
 

seekingthemindofChrist

Casting down imaginations
Jul 10, 2023
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you should get at least a dozen "winner" ribbon.
Seeing how I am presently craving some food, I will gladly settle for the "chicken dinner" part of "Winner! Winner! Chicken dinner!" Especially if it is chicken parmigiana. You can keep the ribbons.

lol.
 
Aug 8, 2023
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My mate got married some years ago and when I next saw him again months later after the dust had settled, his first words were "Wow, I'm a lot worse off moneywise since I got married"..;)
They eventually got divorced after about 3 years.
PS- and whenever I met him during those 3 years, he kept sneaking looks at his watch, so I asked why and he replied "She told me to be back by x o'clock and if i'm late i'll be in big trouble".
Exactly the same thing happened when another pal and his wife stayed with me for a holiday, he kept sneaking looks at his watch as we walked around town while she stayed in, and he said exactly what my first pal said about having to be back on time.
PS- their marriage lasted about a couple of years before they separated.
Me, I never married thank God..:)
 

Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
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its ok I this is a marriage and wedding thread not a funeral one.

I think the royal family have a lot to answer for popularising big lavish weddings even though many of them got divorced later. I was thinking about Princess Dianas and Prince Charles wedding where she had a twenty five foot long train, huge pouffy skirt and puff sleeves.

Their sons had popular royal weddings to broadcast to millions and no expense spared. Princess Kate was a party planner, and ex Princess Meghan had dramas over her father NOT giving her away or even showing up. I read a book about their wedding and the last chapters were basically ads for all the wedding paraphenalia they used from centre pieces to jewellery to flowers to calligraphy invites, wine and cutlery.

Taxpayers paid for all that?!
Royal weddings and such are huge tourism boosters. It's a net economic benefit.
 

Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
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One thing I learned from reading the book (called Something New) is she gushed over finding a bridal gown with pockets. Well anyone ordinary would have found a dress and if it didnt have pockets would have sewn some in.
But I think women seem to expect all outfits come ready made to fit these days. You cant expect to buy a gown off the rack and have it fit perfectly especially if its bridal or evening wear.

I am not sure why the trend is for wedding gowns to look like evening wear (if the wedding is during the day) and the strapless mermaid look which requires ingenious undergarments to hold it all up.

Most weddings are held in spring when the flowers are out but there is only a short season when they are their best otherwise the cost of getting flowers goes way up since they have to be delivered from half way round the world. I dont know if brides these days ever consider it. But I heard that for some families, no expense should be spared for their princess.

Apparently NZs former prime minister still hasnt had her wedding because of covid etc and had to keep cancelling her wedding venue. She has a 5 year old daughter now. There was a big sotoush in the media about her cancelling a venue and the owners complained it left them put of pocket. We have a business to run! they claim...but someone has every right to cancel a booking if they give enough notice. The hospitality industry cant complain when people dont want to utilise them if they make it so expensive and dependent on weddings to keep them afloat.

dont get me started on the funeral industry! lol
You might like this...............

 

Duck

Member
Aug 21, 2023
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Weddings can be cheap now days. Get a friend to by a wedding license online and officiate, then eat hot dogs.
 
Sep 1, 2023
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The discussion about wedding expenses and trends is quite interesting. It's true that many weddings are associated with considerable costs. From gowns with pockets to the unique challenges of finding the perfect outfit, the wedding fashion landscape is quite diverse.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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Couldnt you just make a wedding gown out of net curtains? Surely thats not too expensive and it if its not real lace nobody would care because you can just splash out on lacy underwear.

Or you could hire a gown and tux. Getting the right fit if you a bride though might be a challenge if you not going for the toga princess leia look
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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Has anyone done My Big Fat Geek Wedding

I imagine everyone wearing their spectacles for that one
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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now all the wedding industry professionals are hijacking my thread trying to advertise their wares and merch. Huh.

I notice they arent giving any discounts. If its your second wedding you should be able to get everything half price right?
 

Karlon

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2023
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I often come across couples who arent married but just live together, and they might be together for many years, even have children and buy a house together. But they just arent married. And when I ask why, the most common reason given is its too expensive to get married.

Is it really?

And sometimes its even christian believers who say this.

So how are we to think of marriage is it only for the rich? Only if the hsuband is willing to provide for his household, what does this say about people who dont marry yet live like they are married. They are too poor? Can weddings be cheaper or why not just register at an office. Or does it all need to be done in church. Why is it so expensive? People say they'd rather spend the money on a house. But what does that say about priorities? Have a wedding, be married and be homeless, or not marry and have a roof over your head. Can one have both?
the most common answer not mentioned is kept in the mind: "i can take off anytime i want, i'm not bound"!
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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free and single

I think most people prefer this actually, but if you've done the deed and had the baby, (or think youll be headed in that direction) you must make your bed and lie in it.
 

justahumanbeing

Well-known member
Mar 25, 2020
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I often come across couples who arent married but just live together, and they might be together for many years, even have children and buy a house together. But they just arent married. And when I ask why, the most common reason given is its too expensive to get married.

Is it really?

And sometimes its even christian believers who say this.

So how are we to think of marriage is it only for the rich? Only if the hsuband is willing to provide for his household, what does this say about people who dont marry yet live like they are married. They are too poor? Can weddings be cheaper or why not just register at an office. Or does it all need to be done in church. Why is it so expensive? People say they'd rather spend the money on a house. But what does that say about priorities? Have a wedding, be married and be homeless, or not marry and have a roof over your head. Can one have both?
God made Man and Woman for each other freely. There never was a price tag when God brought the two together.

Money does not determine the marriage. Unfortunately, we live in a society that operates this way.

I think it is between the couple. How they want to get married. Or whether making such a choice is going to be expensive.

In fact, you have stated many nice options by way of questions. Most people go for one of those when they decide to get married or when they don't.

A relationship with Jesus as it's center will last. A marriage under God will always have His grace to hold itself together when the tough times come.

Give it up to God. It's never the same for any two couples.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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for most (young) couples it actually isn't between the couple, wedding plans are the parents/grandparents perogative.
 

Lanolin

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A friend of mine has wedding dramas when her sister dropped her from the wedding party for being a Christian.
 

Lanolin

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my cousins still hasnt married she got engaged and last year and was showing off her ring last Christmas but not date been set. Now she has a new job, so she may earn enough money now to pay off her mortgage as she bought the house first.

I dont think it will happen making it official until maybe she gets a wakeup call that it needs to be done. After five years of living together everyone treats you as married even if you didnt change your name and sign anything. Children also just take their mothers or fathers surname if their parents didnt marry.

I know divorcees who changed their surnames back after they got divorced. You may get a new title when you marry (from miss to mrs) but nobody ever calls people that now except in schools, even in workplaces its equal you are on first name basis with colleagues and even managers.

Its quite strange to go from say a formal, heirarchal environment like some schools can be to the real world where it doesnt happen.
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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I'll wait and see about this one it could drag on forever but one of my friends who is a grandmother now doesn't think her son will be popping question anytime soon.

Most of the children of the church parents are not married and don't even go to the churches their parents go to. They just live with whatever partners they can find. If you leave home, there is no rule that says you have to marry, or the house that you buy needs to be for a new family. You could just buy one and live with your brothers and sisters. Or flat.

I think people generally aren't keen on marriage/life time commitment big deal because most people don't have secure jobs or know if they'll live that long.
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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Well it seems like my engaged cousins parents are headed for divorce like her fiance (his are already divorced)

I don't know what the answer is. I think you go all in at first and then find its not what you expect after a couple of years. I don't know what the expectation actually is. Maybe you get sick of each other. If one has to give up their homeland and friends (forsaking all others) and then finds out children are even more trouble and the house is falling apart because nobody can afford to repair it then that's not much of a life together is it.

After you've taken out your frustrations on each other and nearly killed each other in the process I guess thats the only bearable solution. Most children don't like it when their parent cheats or hurts the other parent or has to witness violence, argument and then they don't do anything about it.