A Man desires a Woman

[TheLastKnight]

At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I think you probably need to look around at your church. I understand you are chagrined about the way ungodly women behave. If you want to find yourself a godly woman, then you have to go where they are- this means church. God bless you, and I hope you are able to find her.

If I start going to church to look for a date, then church will probably become about trying to find that instead of Drawing close to the Lord and Worshiping the Father. From my experience there are women in the church that are only their looking for a date also. I know what you are saying and I wouldn't trust a relationship that was forged in a bar. Church would be a great place to meet somebody but that will not be my first intention nor should I try to use that as a seeking ground that might take my focus from the Lord. I don't even concern myself with trying to meet someone anymore but If God wills it then ok. I put that on God's shoulders now and not my own. Just a few of my thoughts.

 

[Galatea]

If I start going to church to look for a date, then church will probably become about trying to find that instead of Drawing close to the Lord and Worshiping the Father. From my experience there are women in the church that are only their looking for a date also. I know what you are saying and I wouldn't trust a relationship that was forged in a bar. Church would be a great place to meet somebody but that will not be my first intention nor should I try to use that as a seeking ground that might take my focus from the Lord. I don't even concern myself with trying to meet someone anymore but If God wills it then ok. I put that on God's shoulders now and not my own. Just a few of my thoughts.

I know what you are saying, I felt like that too- at first. That it seems kind of hypocritical to go to church hoping to find a mate- BUT it is kind of pious ridiculousness to say "God will bring me a wife", I mean- where is He going to bring her to you? Will you stumble across each other in the grocery store? I once had a guy ask me to come to his house and show him how to cook yellow rice (no kidding) but, somehow, he did not seem like the marrying type. When I think about it, several of the couples I know met at church. There really isn't a better place to meet a Christian. With this being said, not everyone in church is a Christian, of course.

I don't think worshipping God and looking for a mate have to be mutually exclusive pursuits. After all, God invented marriage and He thinks it is an honorable state. I would not suggest you just go to church SOLELY for finding a mate. If you go to a church where there are a lot of beautiful single women, but the doctrine is not biblical, that is obviously not the place to be.

I think it is perfectly acceptable to God to be practical, and use our brains and not be so mystical about it. What I mean is, go to a church where you are growing and getting closer to the Lord, and look around at the single ladies there.

 

[Lostsoul91]

Masculine or not. Women is women. Do we have to stereotype them. There is no set of rules saying women should dress like this and not like that. I think it's up to us what we dress and act like. I rather be me than be someone fake. Besides God has decided before our birth who we end up with. Nothing we do can change that .

 

[Angelsnow]

Dear Knight,

I hate to admit it..but you are right. In 2017...shaved heads..and manly behavior...is the norm. It's sad. I am blessed that I was raised old school....and i am very feminine. I loove my hair in pretty girly curls and sometimes...straight and sleek... And personally I don't feel "dressed" unless my perfume is on.

I don't care what the "experts" say....but i think its healthy to NEED someone that you love. When i was a younger woman....all i dreamed of...was a career. To become a mover and shaker. But with age...and time..and being sick...you learn the value of what is truly important in life. **Love** The kind that God speaks of. (Solomon? to).

The heart of a woman is mysterious. (most men? can't figure it out). Same with men. There is a mystique to most men. (if they have depth) It shines out. Showing yourself to be vulnerable..is both a feminine trait. (and an extremely masculine one when its a man who shares his secrets...his pain....and his dreams). Things of the heart.

Softness and gentle warmth...should dot most women's path. We all...have become so fearful of rejection, Both men and women. That we now automatically go on the defensive. It's true.

American men? ....a lot...want money flowing into the home. (if they can't earn it?....they look for a woman...who can) And Most ...."foreign" women? Don't work...anywhere NEAR...as hard as American Women. They don't. America was built on people..who would HUSTLE....(no welfare back then) and a dream they carried. Truly COURAGEOUS people...who left everything...to come to America. With nothing...but the clothes on their backs. They stepped off boats..at Ellis Island...and ...that was it. A second chance. (at a better life). Back then? ...if you didn't work? ...you didn't eat. It was a VERY simple yet harsh lesson in life.

Yes..American women? have strayed away ...from being feminine. I can see it clearly The color PINK...is rarely worn on Wall Street, In boardrooms across america.

But also...American men? ...a lot have become a bunch of women. Its true. They don't hold open doors for women. They expect the girl to PAY for dinner. Its sick. So if a woman..is ..."searching"..can you blame her? we WANT men. I do. I'm 48. Not a kid. I have pretty tough standards...in love. I'm NOT willing to lower them.

Is it so wrong...to WANT to contribute to the house...in finances? (not be the main bread winner)...but still...contribute? I don't want to emasculate a man. NOPE. But...why can't...a girl...be pretty and smart!! And a leader in her ministry for God? Perhaps...a mentor...for other women?

Do you believe...Women should NOT work? ..and sit at home? ...when there are bills to pay? Be honest!!! Weather she is asian or american....sometimes....a man needs help!!! .... Choose wisely...the girl....who will jump in...to help you!!!!...because...it will happen . Jobs come and go. But your SPOUSE...should last forever.

I agree with a lot of what you said. BUT...some of it i don't. I am a VERY Feminine....American woman (right down to my vanilla perfumes) . A man doesn't need to look to another country....to find Christian woman who are feminine...and full of love. and who will adore them. There are PLENTY right here in America. You gotta be pretty blind. (to NOT see those american girls...that still sport...pretty hair that smells like coconut . Sparkly earrings. Silk blouses. Dainty feminine rings) ...and pretty flowery purses. (Oh...Vera Bradley makes those)

So, next time you are out? open your eyes...you might actually...see a treasure...you were too blind to see...before.

GBU.

Today I saw a video of a woman that was explaining why she thought that men in the US were seeking women from Asia. She explained that she believed that women in the west were becoming like men and that Asian women still have that feminine attribute to them. I believe that is not far from the truth. In the US women have adopted large trucks, taken on jobs that only men used to do, they use vulgar language and even chew spit tobacco (even Copenhagen), they drink beers, fart, burp, cut their hair short, wear jeans and show off. US women have sought to fill the man's position in the house as leader and be in charge of the finances and sneak off to go party at the bar late at night while leaving daddy home with the kids (no married person has any business in a bar or club). Women have sought to "flop the table" on men. This may strike some men as fancied but it is far from my ideal.
Men want a womanly woman, one that wears a dress and wears it well, long hair, smells pretty. The last thing a guy wants in a wife is her to be one of the guys. No man wants to marry their Bro! Men need a woman to take care of, that is what we desire and it's buried deep within. If we have a woman that we cannot take care of then we are not fulfilling our purpose as a husband. We need women to rely on us to protect them and if we are not allowed to do that then there is an empty void in the marriage. Men want a woman that desires to have a family (kids and a husband). A man does not want a woman that runs off in the middle of the night and goes off and flirts with other guys. Men don't want to be jealous over their wives, that takes away from the bond of the marriage and is cheating. Men do not want a woman that dresses her body to be adored by every other man but rather a woman who is all their own and they can love endlessly. Men want a family and kids and the woman that oversees the love in them.
Men need to be that leader and need to feel that they are protecting and caring for their wife. Men want to adore their wife in every way and know that she has the paste to hold the love together and the desire to let the man be the man. Not only is it of God's creation for the man to lead the wife but it is also mandatory for the man to feel that he has that purpose. I feel that women have this knowledge built in but some how the US has set a different standard for women. We have sabotaged our own mothers and daughters and wife's. Now if only can explain to me what God means when he says the woman's desire shall be to her husband???

 

[Miri]

Gee so much generalisation on both parts.

Im so glad God didn't say to Eve, I can only use you if you have long hair, wear pink and act
girlie. I'm so glad God didn't say to Adam I can only use you if you plough fields, open doors
for women and pay for dinner.

Im so glad God did say:-

1 Corinthians 1:26-28 NKJV
[26] For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not
many mighty, not many noble, are called. [27] But God has chosen the foolish things
of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world
to put to shame the things which are mighty; [28] and the base things of the world and
the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring
to nothing the things that are,

 

[TheLastKnight]

Masculine or not. Women is women. Do we have to stereotype them. There is no set of rules saying women should dress like this and not like that. I think it's up to us what we dress and act like. I rather be me than be someone fake. Besides God has decided before our birth who we end up with. Nothing we do can change that .

Dang peach, why such a lemon! Yes I stereotype a woman as a feminine being that is desirable for a man in all naturality, now I'm not saying don't shave your arm pits, some women don't and that might be hard to adapt to cuddling a wookie! You are absolutely right! It is up to you how you dress and act. Is it fake for a woman to cover her face in paint and her body in tattoos? what is left that is real to the appearance? I can only express my thoughts in my desires as a man. There is someone for everyone. God does have plan and perhaps that special person for each of us but that person is not always the one that we end up with when we decide to go our own ways instead of following Gods plan! Some men might like a masculine woman but I'm not one of them.

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

Gee so much generalisation on both parts.

Im so glad God didn't say to Eve, I can only use you if you have long hair, wear pink and act
girlie. I'm so glad God didn't say to Adam I can only use you if you plough fields, open doors
for women and pay for dinner.

Im so glad God did say:-

1 Corinthians 1:26-28 NKJV
[26] For you see your calling, brethren, that not many wise according to the flesh, not
many mighty, not many noble, are called. [27] But God has chosen the foolish things
of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world
to put to shame the things which are mighty; [28] and the base things of the world and
the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring
to nothing the things that are,

Yeah people really seem to get caught up in meaningless things, imo anyhow : p

I think it would be cool to find a girl who, aside from doing whats right, didnt care about all this junk, what colors shes expected to like or what males are expected to like, the way she acts around others and how fancy she dresses and all that, to be best friends with : p
Would be someone I could relate to, haha.

 

[cinder]

And Most ...."foreign" women? Don't work...anywhere NEAR...as hard as American Women. They don't.

Most foreign women (especially those from more traditional and strict gender roles cultures) work far harder than the average american woman. Perhaps when we consider those women on dating or mail order bride sites who want to marry a rich foreigner that's not true, but for your average everyday person; they work harder and with far fewer vacations. American women come out on the lazy side of the world's population; heck a lot of them hire people to do the cleaning, cooking, and other domestic duties that foreign women (who may work 8 or 12 or more hours a day on a daily basis) are expected to do for their families on top of any outside of the home job they have. That's part of the reason foreign women are so willing to marry western men, the expectations are lower and the appreciation and respect are higher.

 

[TheLastKnight]

The reality is that society sets the standards and the norms for how both women and men behave and whats in style or popular. Sadly this is what it has become all about is doing what is popular to fit in. Living in the flesh, I abhor it. Gods style is without flaw if only we could give up the worldly things and follow the Almighty. Pink has been a color associated to girly , but that's not biblical to my knowledge and I don't personally wear pink it is pleasant to see on a woman but I really don't care what color she wears. Where did the idea of makeup come from? Why would a woman want to cover up her face and hide it from people? She has a natural beauty, don't you know you are made in the likeness of God? Surely Makeup is not a girly thing by Gods standards, it only hinders your natural beauty and you don't need it. When I speak of a mans desire for a woman I really don't address the material things although I used that as an example because I'm finding it hard to place in another context. What is girly and what is worldly? Throw out all you know from being the perfect woman or man and just be who God created you to be is the point. A man needs to feel that he is in control and he is the provider and the protector. Now I am not talking about in control like a dominating sense but in control as in he knows everything is safe and secure. A man needs to fill his duty as Lord over his house in the sense that he has that domain protected and all within are taken care of. True many men fail at this and most situations are not ideal. I'm not putting this all on the woman, but the men can maybe understand also that if they are not filling their part and they are feeling less than adequate or defeated it may be because you are not fulfilling your God given role it is a duty not an excuse. It does take two to tango!

 

[GODisLOVE7]

Dang peach, why such a lemon! Yes I stereotype a woman as a feminine being that is desirable for a man in all naturality, now I'm not saying don't shave your arm pits, some women don't and that might be hard to adapt to cuddling a wookie! You are absolutely right! It is up to you how you dress and act. Is it fake for a woman to cover her face in paint and her body in tattoos? what is left that is real to the appearance? I can only express my thoughts in my desires as a man. There is someone for everyone. God does have plan and perhaps that special person for each of us but that person is not always the one that we end up with when we decide to go our own ways instead of following Gods plan! Some men might like a masculine woman but I'm not one of them.

Lolol... European men usually don't like French girl's armpit hair. Yes, that's a stereotype, and from what I hear its fairly accurate. But... There could be some awesome hairy French girl out there for ya. But its France, after all. Lol. All Europeans give them a hard time.

And no, I'm not French. There seems to be confusion on CC with my flag!

 

[GODisLOVE7]

The reality is that society sets the standards and the norms for how both women and men behave and whats in style or popular. Sadly this is what it has become all about is doing what is popular to fit in. Living in the flesh, I abhor it. Gods style is without flaw if only we could give up the worldly things and follow the Almighty. Pink has been a color associated to girly , but that's not biblical to my knowledge and I don't personally wear pink it is pleasant to see on a woman but I really don't care what color she wears. Where did the idea of makeup come from? Why would a woman want to cover up her face and hide it from people? She has a natural beauty, don't you know you are made in the likeness of God? Surely Makeup is not a girly thing by Gods standards, it only hinders your natural beauty and you don't need it. When I speak of a mans desire for a woman I really don't address the material things although I used that as an example because I'm finding it hard to place in another context. What is girly and what is worldly? Throw out all you know from being the perfect woman or man and just be who God created you to be is the point. A man needs to feel that he is in control and he is the provider and the protector. Now I am not talking about in control like a dominating sense but in control as in he knows everything is safe and secure. A man needs to fill his duty as Lord over his house in the sense that he has that domain protected and all within are taken care of. True many men fail at this and most situations are not ideal. I'm not putting this all on the woman, but the men can maybe understand also that if they are not filling their part and they are feeling less than adequate or defeated it may be because you are not fulfilling your God given role it is a duty not an excuse. It does take two to tango!

I agree with the whole make-up thing. I stopped wearing make-up over 3 years ago. On the other hand... its a personal choice and each woman can choose for herself. Make-up doesn't make or break a woman (the heart is what matters) and there could be many reasons why a woman chooses to wear make-up.

I think a man shouldn't feel "in control". I think if the man is in submission to God, his confidence will come from Him instead of things being "safe and secure" because of his own self. That way, when trials come (and they always do) he knows who to turn to and rely on (NOT his human abilities). Having given all control over to God, that is when the woman can submit to the man. Of course there will be times where both man and woman stumble with this, but that's another opportunity for God to strengthen both.

Yes, it takes two to tango. But where it counts is when both are able to "get over" themselves and move into submission.

That's my thoughts anyways... And I will add that I have not had a relationship like this, so I'm not the expert in putting it into practice!

 

[Galatea]

Most foreign women (especially those from more traditional and strict gender roles cultures) work far harder than the average american woman. Perhaps when we consider those women on dating or mail order bride sites who want to marry a rich foreigner that's not true, but for your average everyday person; they work harder and with far fewer vacations. American women come out on the lazy side of the world's population; heck a lot of them hire people to do the cleaning, cooking, and other domestic duties that foreign women (who may work 8 or 12 or more hours a day on a daily basis) are expected to do for their families on top of any outside of the home job they have. That's part of the reason foreign women are so willing to marry western men, the expectations are lower and the appreciation and respect are higher.

It depends on the class of the American woman. Lower class American women, do indeed, work very hard. Some work three jobs- (God knows how).

 

[cinder]

It depends on the class of the American woman. Lower class American women, do indeed, work very hard. Some work three jobs- (God knows how).

Fair point, it may well be much more of a class and socio-economic issue, than a nationality one.

 

[TheLastKnight]

I agree with the whole make-up thing. I stopped wearing make-up over 3 years ago. On the other hand... its a personal choice and each woman can choose for herself. Make-up doesn't make or break a woman (the heart is what matters) and there could be many reasons why a woman chooses to wear make-up.

I think a man shouldn't feel "in control". I think if the man is in submission to God, his confidence will come from Him instead of things being "safe and secure" because of his own self. That way, when trials come (and they always do) he knows who to turn to and rely on (NOT his human abilities). Having given all control over to God, that is when the woman can submit to the man. Of course there will be times where both man and woman stumble with this, but that's another opportunity for God to strengthen both.

Yes, it takes two to tango. But where it counts is when both are able to "get over" themselves and move into submission.

That's my thoughts anyways... And I will add that I have not had a relationship like this, so I'm not the expert in putting it into practice!

God First is always implied when it comes from me. I kind of see things like a chain of command in the way that God is first then it is the man's responsibility over the house hold and the woman looks after the kids when the man is absent. When all come together it is an unstoppable force like a well trained army! LOL. Without one part of the militia... there is a weakness in the chain of command. The husband oversees the wife and kids, the wife strengthens and empowers the husband and directs the children, the children are the ground troops that go on the front line and tear everything up, those little runts, and God is Commander in Chief. This chain of command is not only part of military organization but also of Gods kingdom where it was inspired from. The law of Moses had a chain of command structure that was inspired by God. All things are connected to the Kingdom from soldier to son. Unfortunately a lot of relationships become about who can over power the other when it was meant to be about each other empowering one another. Jesus refers to the church as the wedding bride and he is the groom and each of us are Gods children. This is in likeness to Man and Woman and offspring. A part of Gods Kingdom as it is in heaven. Just another way to magnify the Lord.

 

[GODisLOVE7]

God First is always implied when it comes from me. I kind of see things like a chain of command in the way that God is first then it is the man's responsibility over the house hold and the woman looks after the kids when the man is absent. When all come together it is an unstoppable force like a well trained army! LOL. Without one part of the militia... there is a weakness in the chain of command. The husband oversees the wife and kids, the wife strengthens and empowers the husband and directs the children, the children are the ground troops that go on the front line and tear everything up, those little runts, and God is Commander in Chief. This chain of command is not only part of military organization but also of Gods kingdom where it was inspired from. The law of Moses had a chain of command structure that was inspired by God. All things are connected to the Kingdom from soldier to son. Unfortunately a lot of relationships become about who can over power the other when it was meant to be about each other empowering one another. Jesus refers to the church as the wedding bride and he is the groom and each of us are Gods children. This is in likeness to Man and Woman and offspring. A part of Gods Kingdom as it is in heaven. Just another way to magnify the Lord.

We are totally on the same page, brotha!

 

[lv2ski]

The woman will desire to please her husband---- he will Lord it over her...

No it doesn't mean that

 

[presidente]

If I start going to church to look for a date, then church will probably become about trying to find that instead of Drawing close to the Lord and Worshiping the Father. From my experience there are women in the church that are only their looking for a date also. I know what you are saying and I wouldn't trust a relationship that was forged in a bar. Church would be a great place to meet somebody but that will not be my first intention nor should I try to use that as a seeking ground that might take my focus from the Lord. I don't even concern myself with trying to meet someone anymore but If God wills it then ok. I put that on God's shoulders now and not my own. Just a few of my thoughts.

You can cast all your cares upon God because He cares for you, right? So it isn't wrong to pray for a spouse? Why would it be wrong to choose a spouse from among the Christian community? I don't have a problem with a single man visiting other churches midweek meetings looking for a Christian wife. He can focus on the Lord at the appropriate times, too. We should be finding the men wives and the women husbands in our own communities. Or have your parents do it. Like it says in Jeremiah, to find wives for your sons, etc.

 

[presidente]

My wife is Asia, and I met her in Asia, Indonesia to be exact. It does seem the culture is better in some ways to producing good wives. I'm thinking more along the lines of "Christian culture." It's the norm for women to be virgins at marriage, not to have tattoos, to cook, clean and take care of children, and not to flatulate loudly in public (maybe pregnant women and women with health issues get a free pass on the burping, but my anecdotal experiences with my wife's relatives and other individuals may be unrepresentative of the population).

 

[GODisLOVE7]

My wife is Asia, and I met her in Asia, Indonesia to be exact. It does seem the culture is better in some ways to producing good wives. I'm thinking more along the lines of "Christian culture." It's the norm for women to be virgins at marriage, not to have tattoos, to cook, clean and take care of children, and not to flatulate loudly in public (maybe pregnant women and women with health issues get a free pass on the burping, but my anecdotal experiences with my wife's relatives and other individuals may be unrepresentative of the population).

Oooh! I'm sure her cooking is an awesome side benefit. Rijsttafel is one of my favourites!

 

[Yeraza_Bats]

Sooooo I gotta ask, whats with this whole "women farting in public" thing? Like for real, I dont know anyone who does this intentionally anywhere. Sometimes accidents happen, and sometimes we dont control that it happens. But I literally dont know anyone who just willingly and shamelessly farts in public.