How Do Men Like to be Complimented?

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J

jbrooks5912

Guest
#41
Hey Everyone,

Since we have a thread going on about when it may or may not be appropriate to call a woman "hot" or "beautiful", I wanted to start a thread asking the gentlemen how THEY like to be complimented.

I have this theory that most people hear only bad things about themselves (whether through their own self-talk or from others), and very rarely ever hear anything good, especially as they get older.

I also wonder if it's tougher for the guys, because women generally hear positive feedback from their close friends, but how often do men hear anything positive about themselves (I'm guessing not often), and how can we change that?

For example, I have often been around male co-workers whom I've wanted to compliment for various qualities, but, it seems like there are so many complication, especially between opposite genders.

For example:

+ I don't want to sound like a creeper (you know, like the kind who drives a windowless van and has it parked outside.)

+ I don't want to sound like I'm hitting on him (most especially because he may have a girlfriend or even a wife, and may not be wearing a ring.) I don't want to disrespect another woman by complimenting her man in a way that would be seen as inappropriate (and I know in many cases, even if you try to give an "innocent" compliment, like about his character, it could be see as you trying to steal someone's man away.)

+ If he IS a single available guy, I don't want him to think I am somehow obsessing over him or throwing myself at him.

My usual approach is to try to compliment something about their values such as, "Thank you for beinghonest," or, "Thank you for taking the time to put that away instead of just throwing it anywhere." But I often wonder if it's best that I not say anything at all.

How about the rest of you?

* Have you ever found yourself wanting to compliment a guy (even if you're a guy and want to say something encouraging to another brother in Christ), but didn't know what to say, or how to word it?

* If you want to compliment something about a guy, how do you go about it without sending the wrong signals?

* Guys, what tips would you give the rest of us for trying to say something supportive to you?

And, as a bonus-- How does one go about complimenting a man over his looks? I am a child of the 80's, and back then, all the girls described an attractive male (good golly, that sounds so sterile, like a lab description or something) as "cute". And I'm guessing men aren't very fond of that.

* Guys, would it ever be appropriate for someone to compliment your looks? What descriptions do you prefer -- would you want to be called "handsome", "good-looking", "cute", etc.?

* If you work out a lot at the gym, what could someone who notices that say without sounding like a stalker?

* Or, is it best not to say anything at all, to avoid any misunderstandings?

We are eagerly awaiting your replies. :)
INteresting, a compliment is rare to me. Mainly because i have been judged by my looks alot. IT clearly determines because if its genuine i may mot even know it, like i said its rare to me.

For instance the only compliment i get is about my eyes. Very limited few said im handsom.

So to me my eyes are the most attractive part ladies like but maybe im wrong lol so thats a hard one to answer.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
26,769
5,100
113
64
Florida
#42
Does anyone think it depends where you live? Are there regional
differences etc.

I live in Yorkshire in the UK.
Over here everyone calls each over love, even the men do.
For example:

Thanks love
How are you love.
That’s nice love.

I was reminded about this only a few days ago. I was at a bus stop and two men
were talking to each other - one said yes love to the other.

It’s also common for dad’s to call their adult and young sons love.

In some areas of Yorkshire you get called “duck” hello duck, how are you
duck etc.

Over here it’s common too to say to a man, oh you look nice, I like your new
hair cut. That’s nice aftershave you are wearing. Compliments can often take the
course of irony.

It’s just that we are sociable friendly people up north. You can strike up
a conversation at a bus stop with complete strangers, ask how they are etc
and no one blinks an eyelid. Doesn’t matter whether they are men or women.

Now down south London area, people keep themselves to themselves.
If you call a stranger “love” or paid them a compliment, they would think
you were psychotic, gay or after their money!

So if any of you ever decide to visit Yorkshire don’t freak out when someone
calls you love even if you are a man. If you happen to have a US accent, you
will also get a lot of looks and attention from both men and women who want to
know about you. Lol
In the state of Maine everyone calls each other dear. After 8 years of living there I now do this myself.
 
J

jbrooks5912

Guest
#43
My sister has said i looked like Jesus, with my long hair gotea and stuff lol thats kinda funny in a way coming from my sister.

But i was in a relationship before and the woman could not even look at me im like ummm ok? Lol its that Jesus apperence thing i guess cuz she mentioned that.

Then i found iut she was cheating. She felt very very guilty but what can i say right?

This is partly the reason why i stayed single not cuz of what i look like but because i been cheated on so much it hurts to even try.

It just crazy because my heart is big but no one wants to be takers. I guess it happens even to the best of us.

Its not about culture, not about color, not even about looks to me. Its about that spark and that paints rainbows of different colors.
 
J

jbrooks5912

Guest
#46
Lol thats all i can say us fat boys love food and im not really all that fat lol
I was joking 🙃 I picking but my photo is going to be released in a moment so yeah the scary part is about to be seen ahh run! Lol jp
 
J

jbrooks5912

Guest
#47
To be honest i do have a gut londa thing going on. I am a big dude but its my bones that are big.

I am 6'2, and like 265 pounds but alot deals with my height and my bones.

Some is fat and yes i call myself a fat boy because i like to eat. I eat mainly for energy when im not working i dont eat a whole lot.

So if i offended anyone i apologize. Im just in a goofy mood
 

Phillster

Senior Member
Jan 16, 2013
117
7
18
#48
To be honest i do have a gut londa thing going on. I am a big dude but its my bones that are big.

I am 6'2, and like 265 pounds but alot deals with my height and my bones.

Some is fat and yes i call myself a fat boy because i like to eat. I eat mainly for energy when im not working i dont eat a whole lot.

So if i offended anyone i apologize. Im just in a goofy mood
Relax, I'm to far away to bite your head off...unless that's you down by the corner.
 

Gracie_14

A Beloved Companion
Jul 31, 2017
4,171
2,123
113
17
Surrey, Southern England
#49
Does anyone think it depends where you live? Are there regional
differences etc.

I live in Yorkshire in the UK.
Over here everyone calls each over love, even the men do.
For example:

Thanks love
How are you love.
That’s nice love.

I was reminded about this only a few days ago. I was at a bus stop and two men
were talking to each other - one said yes love to the other.

It’s also common for dad’s to call their adult and young sons love.

In some areas of Yorkshire you get called “duck” hello duck, how are you
duck etc.

Over here it’s common too to say to a man, oh you look nice, I like your new
hair cut. That’s nice aftershave you are wearing. Compliments can often take the
course of irony.

It’s just that we are sociable friendly people up north. You can strike up
a conversation at a bus stop with complete strangers, ask how they are etc
and no one blinks an eyelid. Doesn’t matter whether they are men or women.

Now down south London area, people keep themselves to themselves.
If you call a stranger “love” or paid them a compliment, they would think
you were psychotic, gay or after their money!

So if any of you ever decide to visit Yorkshire don’t freak out when someone
calls you love even if you are a man. If you happen to have a US accent, you
will also get a lot of looks and attention from both men and women who want to
know about you. Lol
I totally get that, Miri. As a Brit myself...I just love hearing "Here you are, love" Or "Take care of yourself, love, will ya?" And don't forget..."Mi love" :love::ROFL: like..."Thank you mi love..." Like those two words are strung together...

It's just soo good....hehe

Especially, when I go to the local shops to get a few things and it's an older person who sees me as a younger more vulnerable person...they would add "love" on and it's just so meaningful...in my opinion...as a youngster...

To the OP...I know it's not related but I couldn't help commenting on a fellow British person's post like Miri! :giggle:
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
26,769
5,100
113
64
Florida
#54
The best compliment that I can receive as a husband is to have my wife say "I love you".
 

Gracie_14

A Beloved Companion
Jul 31, 2017
4,171
2,123
113
17
Surrey, Southern England
#55
Okay, sorry @seoulsearch about this...:sneaky:

But, if i can hijack this thread for a moment...

Okay, let's seee.....So, the thread title was addressed to "Men" in being complimented...what about teenage boys? Like 16-19. How do they like being complimented? :unsure::giggle:

Anyone?
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#56
I don't care much for compliments... but I like to be agreed with.
😅
 

Miri

The Thingy Member
Jul 22, 2012
8,908
1,856
113
UK age 50
#57
Okay, sorry @seoulsearch about this...:sneaky:

But, if i can hijack this thread for a moment...

Okay, let's seee.....So, the thread title was addressed to "Men" in being complimented...what about teenage boys? Like 16-19. How do they like being complimented? :unsure::giggle:

Anyone?

I’m not a teenage boy (obviously). But maybe something along the lines of
You play really well on the play station. Ha ha
 

Gracie_14

A Beloved Companion
Jul 31, 2017
4,171
2,123
113
17
Surrey, Southern England
#60
I’m not a teenage boy (obviously). But maybe something along the lines of
You play really well on the play station. Ha ha
Hahaha that's a good one....

I was thinking of their hair....never touch their hair...anyway, they're very fond of their hair with all the greasy gel and the position the tresses are....I can't even form the words right now...my goodness....but a compliment would really be appreciated for their hair...hehe