Recovering Love Addict

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joefizz

Senior Member
Apr 23, 2017
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25
#21
Has anyone felt as though life without a partner is meaningless or worthless before and if so how did you overcome it ? How does one know life is worth living regardless of relationship status.
Just give your life to God and he will guide you to what path to take maybe you'll find a partner,maybe not,but God uplifts us,sure we will have times of despair,but whether in a relationship or not when one does right for God he gives blessings,I get what Galatea means but actually God is enough,for before we were born God was there,after we were born God was there,when we had needs he provided them,all before we even loved him,if not for God we "would have nothing".
 
Feb 5, 2017
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#22
I think thoughts of relationship love are important. Even if it's just having a crush on someone you will never be with.

Love addiction is when you go to desperate lengths to try and find it.

When you aren't looking for love, love finds you. And it mostly finds you when you find love for yourself and forget the feelings of needing it.

We appreciate a rainbow from afar and don't need to take it home with us. I think love is the same. And I think the majority of people who do get married, get married for the wrong reasons, mainly 'loneliness'. It's an understandable reason, but it is carnal because the real truth is that we are not alone.

When I get married it will be because I have met my bestest friend, and we are already married in heart, soul mates.
 
Aug 2, 2009
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#23
Some have the "gif of singleness", but if everyone had it, none of us would have been born....

 

AbigailZeke

Senior Member
Mar 11, 2016
3,042
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Singapore
abigail.pro
#24
Gal, chill. You're confusing this thread as something else. No one here thinks people should be anti-social (because then, they would not be here, obviously).

The point they're trying to make (which I'm in agreement) is that it is good to have a life partner (read OP). But it is not that bad to not have one. And for the record, Enoch and Elijah are with God, alive, as far as we know. I don't think they'd exchange His presence for the world, or the people in it.

Isn't one of the reasons you're a Christian is because you know that Christ is all you need? Unless of course, it isn't. Then, I'd understand why you have very different views.

People ARE SOCIAL!!! Even antisocial people who THINK they don't need others go online to talk to PEOPLE. God made us this way, all people. Single people die sooner and are more depressed. This is scientific fact.

I maintain that it IS absolute drivel to say people don't need people. Everyone needs human contact or go stark, staring mad. Why do you think solitary confinement is torture?

I maintain that it is biblical for people to need other people. If we didn't, God would not have designed marriage and the family, procreation the way He has. We could be pod people, just like plants reproducing ourselves and in communion with God alone.

Absolutely, pure drivel. People who are antisocial are not balanced. People who need people are balanced. Even Jesus had friends and a family. I would go so far as to say God created people because HE needs people. We all need some human being on which to lavish love.

To the OP: You are normal. Not longing for a human is abnormal. So keep rocking and find yourself a wife you can talk to face to face and put your arm around and share this existence.
 

WineRose

Senior Member
Jan 3, 2017
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Row A, Column 9
#25
Okay, first of all: SINGAPOOOOORREEEE!!!

Secondly, hey, I have always been single, and I'm happy, so I don't give two things about it, tbh. And for the sake of your health, I suggest you do the same.
 

Lynx

Senior Member
Aug 13, 2014
12,888
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#26
Some have the "gif of singleness", but if everyone had it, none of us would have been born....
A cogent point.

And I should clarify that there is nothing at all wrong with wanting to find a spouse. That also is perfectly normal. Just don't miss your whole life for lack of a spouse. And if you happen to be single and content and see no need of looking for a spouse, there is also nothing wrong with that. :cool:
 

Nightingale77

Junior Member
Jun 7, 2017
11
1
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#27
I can relate to how you feel. I’m in a relationship but on somedays I feel lonelier than when I’m single. But I have to practice telling myself that if I have to rely on someone to fill in the void in my heart, I’m in for a BIG trouble. Only Jesus can fill in the void our heart have and only Him can love us when the rest of the world leaves us. I know it’s hard but establishing a good and healthy relationship with God first may be your answer to your love quest to come. Take care. God bless.
 
Jun 24, 2017
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#28
Anyone who says "God is enough" is speaking absolute drivel. God is NOT enough. We were meant to be with people. Designed to be social and designed to be mated. God has said "it is not good for man to be alone". When Paul was talking about the blessed state of singleness, he SAYS he is talking about his own opinion and this is not God speaking through him.

I would say if you long for a mate, you are absolutely normal and functioning correctly. We are not asexual beings, after all.
Galatea, I really appreciate your honesty. I can see where people might be defensive, because, theologically God is enough. It's true, and those who can accept it in a way that dictates their actions should. But he did also place a desire within us, most of us, for each other. Both in fellowship and in ordained relationship. Not only that, but saying God is enough is the complete opposite of what we get taught in application. Churches push marriage. I don't know of any single pastors who've been hired and I think it would be a tough row to hoe for a pastor that chose to remain single for the cause of Christ. And you're right; it is worth noting that a relationship with Christ is designed to be had around other people. "The greatest of all of these is Love" I'm not equating fellowship with marriage, but the point stands that we were never designed to be alone. Anyone who can actually embrace singleness has a gift not given to the rest of us.
 
G

Galatea

Guest
#29
It's orange crush. Orange crush is a rather well known brand of soda in some regions, and here it is a play on words, because some people who are infatuated with other people will say "I have a crush on her" or "Yeah, I know she's crushing on me, it's kinda awkward."
I didn’t know what the picture meant. I thought it meant “I am tired of talking to you, so I am going to get something to drink.”
 
G

Galatea

Guest
#30
So when Jesus was tempted by satan"Alone",did he need people?
In His flesh, Jesus DID need people. He had a mother, father, brothers, and friends. He socialized so much that the Pharisees talked about Him having too many feasts! I did not mean people have to be surrounded by others 24-7. But it is absurd to say “God is enough” and you don’t need human contact in some capacity. And yes, the great majority of people need to be mated. I would wager that 99% of the population is sexual and only 1% is asexual. Asexuality is extremely rare and abnormal since it is so rare.
 
G

Galatea

Guest
#31
Gal, chill. You're confusing this thread as something else. No one here thinks people should be anti-social (because then, they would not be here, obviously).

The point they're trying to make (which I'm in agreement) is that it is good to have a life partner (read OP). But it is not that bad to not have one. And for the record, Enoch and Elijah are with God, alive, as far as we know. I don't think they'd exchange His presence for the world, or the people in it.

Isn't one of the reasons you're a Christian is because you know that Christ is all you need? Unless of course, it isn't. Then, I'd understand why you have very different views.
Elijah is a great example of someone who needed people. God was not enough. Elijah escapes to the desert and is so depressed because he tells God “I am all alone. I want to die.” God did not say “You horrible Elijah, I should be enough for you.” Instead, God told him, “You are not alone, I have prophets hiding in the mountains.” When Elijah got better, God sent him to stay with the widow of Nain and her son. I expect the widow took care of him. She had a room for Elijah. I don’t know, maybe they fell in love and got married. Or maybe she was like a mom to him. God knew Elijah needed her. And that she needed Elijah.

Adam walked with God in Eden, the Creator of the Universe walked with him. But Adam had no companion and was lonely. God did not say “You horrible little man, I should be enough.” No, God tenderly put Adam to sleep and made Eve to be a help meet for Adam. God then says “It is not good for man to be alone.”
 

NoNameMcgee

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
4,871
900
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#32
In His flesh, Jesus DID need people. He had a mother, father, brothers, and friends. He socialized so much that the Pharisees talked about Him having too many feasts! I did not mean people have to be surrounded by others 24-7. But it is absurd to say “God is enough” and you don’t need human contact in some capacity. And yes, the great majority of people need to be mated. I would wager that 99% of the population is sexual and only 1% is asexual. Asexuality is extremely rare and abnormal since it is so rare.
asexual has nothing to do with being able to contain


at least not for me


im not asexual

and God is enough


youre throwing your own terms and opinions in as fact



just like when you said men like women who are less intelligent


you paint with such a large brush

and you act like its fact....


i love you...
but i havent seen you once admit you were wrong

when you were
 
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NoNameMcgee

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
4,871
900
113
#33
someone here is hurting ... very much so


and God is enough to help them
 

WineRose

Senior Member
Jan 3, 2017
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217
63
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Row A, Column 9
#34
I can relate to how you feel. I’m in a relationship but on somedays I feel lonelier than when I’m single. But I have to practice telling myself that if I have to rely on someone to fill in the void in my heart, I’m in for a BIG trouble. Only Jesus can fill in the void our heart have and only Him can love us when the rest of the world leaves us. I know it’s hard but establishing a good and healthy relationship with God first may be your answer to your love quest to come. Take care. God bless.
I bet this is the thread with the most Singaporeans in it... :p
 

NoNameMcgee

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
4,871
900
113
#35
i agree that fellowship is important
and brothers and sisters are something that shouldnt be take for granted...

but to conflate a temporal relationship being your only true way to joy

and the importance of fellowship makes no sense
 

NoNameMcgee

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
4,871
900
113
#36
even conflating a desire for a relationship or marriage and joy is absolutely wrong


im happy

very much so


but i do want marriage
id love to be in a relationship


but you saying marriage is the ONLY way to joy for 99% people in a round about way is ridiculous


many widows get joy from God

many who didnt WANT divorce find their joy from God

many who divorced wrongly
and should NOT marry again

get their joy from God....

its not even about "the gift of singleness"
 

NoNameMcgee

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
4,871
900
113
#37
to me it sounds like youre lying... and insulting God

Anyone who says "God is enough" is speaking absolute drivel. God is NOT enough. .

because i know first hand


not some watered down diluted interpretation
or some made up statistic



i guess the only way i could be wrong

is if God truely is not enough for you

and if thats the case

im sorry
but


im not asexual

im not talking about social interaction

or fellowship


im specifically talking about the issue the OP
stated
 

AbigailZeke

Senior Member
Mar 11, 2016
3,042
222
63
Singapore
abigail.pro
#38
You still don't get the point, Gal. I'm not sure if you're refusing to or what. I have seen your previous posts and it may be because you're hurting. Maybe it's worth considering that the fact that you're hurting is because God is not enough for you. Just a thought.

Elijah is a great example of someone who needed people. God was not enough. Elijah escapes to the desert and is so depressed because he tells God “I am all alone. I want to die.” God did not say “You horrible Elijah, I should be enough for you.” Instead, God told him, “You are not alone, I have prophets hiding in the mountains.” When Elijah got better, God sent him to stay with the widow of Nain and her son. I expect the widow took care of him. She had a room for Elijah. I don’t know, maybe they fell in love and got married. Or maybe she was like a mom to him. God knew Elijah needed her. And that she needed Elijah.

Adam walked with God in Eden, the Creator of the Universe walked with him. But Adam had no companion and was lonely. God did not say “You horrible little man, I should be enough.” No, God tenderly put Adam to sleep and made Eve to be a help meet for Adam. God then says “It is not good for man to be alone.”
 

AbigailZeke

Senior Member
Mar 11, 2016
3,042
222
63
Singapore
abigail.pro
#39
i agree that fellowship is important
and brothers and sisters are something that shouldnt be take for granted...

but to conflate a temporal relationship being your only true way to joy

and the importance of fellowship makes no sense
Can't get any clearer than that.
 
Dec 28, 2016
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#40
Do some people believe that since God isn't enough (not that I buy that myself) He "understands" that we have premarital sex because we need to have people in our lives, so it is "OK?" :confused: