Why are you single?

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Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
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The question isn't why are you single, the question really is why aren't your married?


I told my tennis friends a while back, I don't tell you to get divorced, so don't tell me to get married. It was a great way to end the conversation. If your married, thank God. If your single, thank God.

One of my managers from worked asked me, if I was ever gonna get married. I told him, marriage is punishment in some countries (A Wayne's World joke). He replied (my manager who was married), "marriage is punishment in ALL countries".




"He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord".....
Proverbs 18:22
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
2,728
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"He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord".....
Proverbs 18:22

Does the Bible give some balance, or is finding a wife the only option?

What defines a wife that isn't quarrelsome?

Would you say finding a wife that isn't quarrelsome something that is common?

Is finding a wife that isn't quarrelsome a high percentage, or a low percentage?

What percentage of marriages have a wife that isn't quarrelsome?

If we take the scripture seriously, aren't these valid questions to ask?


Proverbs 21:9

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.


Attic life style could be an option. Actually can testify that for me, sleeping in the attic is great!

If you want to be married Butterfly, I hope it's God's will in your life.

God bless!
 

KhedetOrthos

Active member
Dec 13, 2019
284
158
43
Does the Bible give some balance, or is finding a wife the only option?

What defines a wife that isn't quarrelsome?

Would you say finding a wife that isn't quarrelsome something that is common?

Is finding a wife that isn't quarrelsome a high percentage, or a low percentage?

What percentage of marriages have a wife that isn't quarrelsome?

If we take the scripture seriously, aren't these valid questions to ask?


Proverbs 21:9

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.


Attic life style could be an option. Actually can testify that for me, sleeping in the attic is great!

If you want to be married Butterfly, I hope it's God's will in your life.

God bless!
God did create Adam and Eve, after all, so I would say that in a perfect state, we are designed to be married. A wide variety of things keep us from achieving that ideal... my ex wife filed for divorce and left after I lost my job years back.
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
2,728
1,212
113
God did create Adam and Eve, after all, so I would say that in a perfect state, we are designed to be married. A wide variety of things keep us from achieving that ideal... my ex wife filed for divorce and left after I lost my job years back.


Sorry to hear about your divorce bro....That stinks. Are you getting help or counseling? Divorce is very difficult for many to get over, I hope you find encouragement in your faith to get through the divorce.

Here is a video that helped get through some difficult times, hope it helps.




Also, remember Eve gave Adam the forbidden fruit.


Genesis 3:6

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,547
1,277
113
Does the Bible give some balance, or is finding a wife the only option?

What defines a wife that isn't quarrelsome?

Would you say finding a wife that isn't quarrelsome something that is common?

Is finding a wife that isn't quarrelsome a high percentage, or a low percentage?

What percentage of marriages have a wife that isn't quarrelsome?

If we take the scripture seriously, aren't these valid questions to ask?


Proverbs 21:9

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.


Attic life style could be an option. Actually can testify that for me, sleeping in the attic is great!

If you want to be married Butterfly, I hope it's God's will in your life.

God bless!
The answers to many of your questions, could, depend on what kind of husband you are😁....

And scripturally I am free to re-marry , and I have never been someone who was cut out to be single I can assure you🙂
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,547
1,277
113
Sorry to hear about your divorce bro....That stinks. Are you getting help or counseling? Divorce is very difficult for many to get over, I hope you find encouragement in your faith to get through the divorce.

Here is a video that helped get through some difficult times, hope it helps.




Also, remember Eve gave Adam the forbidden fruit.


Genesis 3:6

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.
...and he ate it
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,547
1,277
113
God did create Adam and Eve, after all, so I would say that in a perfect state, we are designed to be married. A wide variety of things keep us from achieving that ideal... my ex wife filed for divorce and left after I lost my job years back.
The way I look at it, is I am thankful that my whole life has not been wasted on someone who never really loved me... hopefully you are free... like me🦋☺️🙏🏻
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,268
2,326
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Georgia
i raise my hands do you not worship that way and are close to the Lord? Just wondering.

You seem to be missing out on a close relationship. I would choose the spirit over the flesh any day.
I think you missed my whole point sis. Oh well. Merry Christmas.
 

G00WZ

Senior Member
May 16, 2014
1,206
406
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36
I remember in preschool i would always get paired with, and have to hold hands with that one kid who always had wet hands when he came out of the restroom...It would always be unnerving because i didn't know if they were just wet because of him washing them and not drying, or simply because he just failed at urinating.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
38,929
15,116
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67
Tennessee
still looking for a wife that has Christ as the center of her life! is she out there?
Yeah, and probably a member of this site. More than one to chose from too. Of course, this special one would have to chose you too.
 

3angelsmsg

Junior Member
Mar 1, 2018
606
646
93
I am single, 'at first with all of my being I wanted to get married'. I lived to get married or to be in relationship because I felt, I had a void in my heart, However as my relationship has grown with God. It is no longer the desire of my heart.

My desire now is to 'live for the glory of God'.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,547
1,277
113
I am single, 'at first with all of my being I wanted to get married'. I lived to get married or to be in relationship because I felt, I had a void in my heart, However as my relationship has grown with God. It is no longer the desire of my heart.

My desire now is to 'live for the glory of God'.
The desire of my heart is to live for the glory of God with a husband who is doing the same...
I don't think one has to negate the other but rather, ' Two are better than one.'
Ecclesiastes 4 v 9-12
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,547
1,277
113
Why are we single? Maybe God wants us to seek Him more, with all of our hearts, or maybe He wants us to trust Him more ( I know of Christians who have married relatively late in life and have a wonderful marriage & family). I feel frustrated when I see dear Christian friends who are widowed, or divorced through no fault of their own, or single and desiring to be married with children having gone past the age of 30... it makes me want to pray for them, and also to serve them.
I am updating my house at present, but when it is finished my hope and prayer is that I may serve my brothers and sisters by being given to hospitality... there is a great lack of opportunity for single Christians to meet up and be together. When I think about how the early church lived, and how we live now, it's no wonder we feel so lonely. I am blessed and encouraged and the loneliness goes away when I am helping others☺️ I wonder whether if we all focussed on loving and serving the Lord and His people, caring for the widow in her distress, being given to hospitality, then maybe we might in turn be blessed with a solution to unwanted singleness because it says if we seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, all things will be added.
It also says that God has ordained works for us to do, so if we are walking in a His will for us personally, I wonder whether this, eventually, might lead us to a spouse.
I am reminded of when it said in the Bible that God looked for a man to stand in the gap... and he could find none... we sure do need each other, and despite my match-making efforts so far being fruitless lol, it seems to me that to offer hospitality to lonely Christians and think on the needs of others is always going to be a blessing to us, to others and to the Lord. It could just be a bring & share buffet, whatever is easy, but all being together and cared about is what matters.... and who knows what could transpire😊
 

Mii

Well-known member
Mar 23, 2019
1,881
1,224
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not many people men to do the mission I do, because men dont really want to look after books or children. In schools and libraries the women out number men like its 10 percent men and 90 percent women.

I dont really get a lot of handholding in my job. I get lots of hugs instead.
1/10 is a sizable portion, I would expect that to be quite less...I hardly ever see men at libraries working.

Personally I am huge fan of the library and children. I don't think I'd want to be a librarian although I have considered it. It's the "being quiet" part that is hard. I can keep noise to a minimum when I'm there, and I usually only go there to work/learning

I advocate libraries though for sure, and haven't ever had anyone take me up on the advice to go when they mention a resource need, or even free events (we have a Zoo atlanta program here). At least people seem interested in the Zoo ticket program, but something as simple as just checking availability every day and driving there for close to a $100 value once a year is too much.



I'd be down to learn the system well enough to be a filler person 1-2 times a month as a volunteer to help with call outs.
Otherwise, I'd just continue to use it as a resource.

Unfortunately, where I am right now, it's not too terribly close. A solid 15 minute drive :(
 

laughingheart

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2016
1,709
1,668
113
This...

Why would you not want what’s best for people, especially with Jesus in your heart. It just doesn’t make any sense.

I’ve dealt with three women who had a narcissistic heart. One in a relationship, one with a family member, one with a co worker. As an empath, it wore me out to where I have a hard time trusting now. I will not deal with it again. I’d rather stay single and just be patient.
I am sorry you have been through that. One of my best friends was married to a narcissist and it almost literally killed her. As someone who is given to empathy this would have really been painful. I am sorry brother.
 

KhedetOrthos

Active member
Dec 13, 2019
284
158
43
Sorry to hear about your divorce bro....That stinks. Are you getting help or counseling? Divorce is very difficult for many to get over, I hope you find encouragement in your faith to get through the divorce.
Thanks, it’s been years now. It was a bit of a kick in the gut at the time, sort of an ”Et tu, Brute?” moment. I retrained and entered a different line of work and all is well.