Antisexuality

[DancingForJesus]

Wow, guess we just got told!

By the way, men CAN'T be sexually exploited? Got it!

Sex is NOT something that "men do TO women". It is something that a husband and wife can enjoy as part of their marriage relationship.

Apparently this part of God's creation is evil because some use it for evil. So because there is some evil, then all must be evil, and it must all stop. How dare we procreate in a Godly marriage? We should be sitting around waiting for the stork to bring the children, or for God to create them from rocks.

Satan has made a perversion of everything that God has made. There is a good and a bad to just about everything, and that's because Satan can only copy. He can't create.

If this OP is legit, I feel sorry for him, for he has obviously endured a lot of pain. But the ideas he presents are beyond ludicrous.
OP, if you are called to NOT have a marriage partner and to not have sex, that's fine. But do not judge others and command others to do what you have decided to do or been called to do. To proclaim to the world what sacrifices you are making to honor God does not honor God. It only produces arrogance and pride.

Matthew 6:1-4 (NLT)
6 “Watch out! Don’t do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. 2 When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get. 3 But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. 4 Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.

Matthew 6:16-18
“And when you fast, don’t make it obvious, as the hypocrites do, for they try to look miserable and disheveled so people will admire them for their fasting. I tell you the truth, that is the only reward they will ever get. 17 But when you fast, comb your hair[d] and wash your face. 18 Then no one will notice that you are fasting, except your Father, who knows what you do in private. And your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.

 

[NotmebutHim]

Apparently this part of God's creation is evil because some use it for evil. So because there is some evil, then all must be evil, and it must all stop. How dare we procreate in a Godly marriage? We should be sitting around waiting for the stork to bring the children, or for God to create them from rocks.

Satan has made a perversion of everything that God has made. There is a good and a bad to just about everything, and that's because Satan can only copy. He can't create.

If this OP is legit, I feel sorry for him, for he has obviously endured a lot of pain. But the ideas he presents are beyond ludicrous.
OP, if you are called to NOT have a marriage partner and to not have sex, that's fine. But do not judge others and command others to do what you have decided to do or been called to do. To proclaim to the world what sacrifices you are making to honor God does not honor God. It only produces arrogance and pride.

Matthew 6:1-4 (NLT)
6 “Watch out! Don’t do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. 2 When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get. 3 But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. 4 Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.

Matthew 6:16-18
“And when you fast, don’t make it obvious, as the hypocrites do, for they try to look miserable and disheveled so people will admire them for their fasting. I tell you the truth, that is the only reward they will ever get. 17 But when you fast, comb your hair[d] and wash your face. 18 Then no one will notice that you are fasting, except your Father, who knows what you do in private. And your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.

Can't remember which epistle it's in, but I'm also reminded of the passage that references "harsh treatment of the body".

 

[williamfinch]

Why would any human put a Dislike on a post encouraging potential rape victims to reach out for help through friends? The discouragement and discredit of rape victims is only a product of those who encourage sex above the wellbeing of women, I sadly believe. I've read so many articles where rape victims were discouraged from reaching out. And a marriage ring does not excuse rape: rape is rape regardless if the rapist is a husband. I know some husbands don't rape their wives, but some do.

And one of the reasons that I refrain from sex is to also refrain from potential sex crimes. If I never engage in sexual conduct, then I can never be rightfully accused of a sex crime. Of course I can be falsely accused of such crime, even because of my color, but I will tell you that most rapists and sexual criminals were dating or friends with their victim and that evidence is usually needed for conviction. If I ever get falsely accused of a sex crime, I'd require quite a lot of amusing fabrication and a bias judge, surely! But I care not if I'm falsely convicted, since the Almighty will know truly that I hadn't committed such sex crime.

 

[tourist]

[QUOTE="williamfinch, post: 4142749, member: 247166"

@tourist We are not Adam and Eve who both existed before the great perversion of the world under certain societies. And being fruitful and multiplying can have many different meaning, not necessarily sex. Being fruitful and multiplying can mean conquering other nations, having a lot of fruits, or having a lot of resources; all which that the early Christians/Hebrews did. But of course, some people are perverted or pro-sexual and think that "fruitful and multiply" pertains to sexual intercourse.
[/QUOTE]

It is quite clear from what was stated in Genesis that to be fruitful and multiply is referring to having children and to do that will require sexual intercourse. God telling Adam and Eve to have lots of fruits? You can't be serious.

 

[tourist]

Why would any human put a Dislike on a post encouraging potential rape victims to reach out for help through friends? The discouragement and discredit of rape victims is only a product of those who encourage sex above the wellbeing of women, I sadly believe. I've read so many articles where rape victims were discouraged from reaching out. And a marriage ring does not excuse rape: rape is rape regardless if the rapist is a husband. I know some husbands don't rape their wives, but some do.

And one of the reasons that I refrain from sex is to also refrain from potential sex crimes. If I never engage in sexual conduct, then I can never be rightfully accused of a sex crime. Of course I can be falsely accused of such crime, even because of my color, but I will tell you that most rapists and sexual criminals were dating or friends with their victim and that evidence is usually needed for conviction. If I ever get falsely accused of a sex crime, I'd require quite a lot of amusing fabrication and a bias judge, surely! But I care not if I'm falsely convicted, since the Almighty will know truly that I hadn't committed such sex crime.

The dislikes were for the tone of the entire bizarre post of your rant of the evils of sex.

 

[EleventhHour]

I am finding this thread disturbing.. time to unwatch.

Why would any human put a Dislike on a post encouraging potential rape victims to reach out for help through friends? The discouragement and discredit of rape victims is only a product of those who encourage sex above the wellbeing of women, I sadly believe. I've read so many articles where rape victims were discouraged from reaching out. And a marriage ring does not excuse rape: rape is rape regardless if the rapist is a husband. I know some husbands don't rape their wives, but some do.

And one of the reasons that I refrain from sex is to also refrain from potential sex crimes. If I never engage in sexual conduct, then I can never be rightfully accused of a sex crime. Of course I can be falsely accused of such crime, even because of my color, but I will tell you that most rapists and sexual criminals were dating or friends with their victim and that evidence is usually needed for conviction. If I ever get falsely accused of a sex crime, I'd require quite a lot of amusing fabrication and a bias judge, surely! But I care not if I'm falsely convicted, since the Almighty will know truly that I hadn't committed such sex crime.

This has to be one of most convoluted arguments I have read in a while.

You know rape is about power and control and not a lot about sex.

 

[NotmebutHim]

Thing is, God could form the current human population out of the dust of the earth and it would be done instantly. However, in His wisdom, He chose sexuality as the means for mankind to procreate and reproduce.

By the way, how does the Song of Solomon factor into this whole discussion if sex is at best a non-pleasurable experience and at worst evil?

 

[melita916]

By the way, how does the Song of Solomon factor into this whole discussion if sex is at best a non-pleasurable experience and at worst evil?

I mentioned this thread to my husband and mentioned the same thing to him about Song of Solomon lol.

 

[williamfinch]

It's a good feeling to know that I'm truly independent. It's a feeling of ultimate self-control. Even though the whole world might want me to have sex, I retain my right and freedom to abstain! It's a very beautiful freedom that I hope other men enjoy in their lifetime too. This virgin and celibate is very grateful for the life that the Almighty has bestowed upon him, and would not chance a disease or false sexual conviction to end it.

A man who did not succumb to sexual exploitation. A man that most of the world hated, but who retained his freedom and right to treat women humanely like a brother and not like an object.

Some societies want men to have sex, for the sake of growing armies, labor forces, and resources. I did not bow to such sexual exploitation at women's expense, but rather showed women true love and respect by treating them as a brother. I did not force nor pay a lady or lesbian for any lust, sadomasochism, self-gratification, or sexual exploitation.

 

[williamfinch]

I did not solicit, force, nor pay a lady or lesbian for any lust, sadomasochism, self-gratification, or sexual exploitation.*

little typo there. sorry.

 

[NotmebutHim]

Is sex a big government conspiracy?

This is just weird

 

[Hazelelponi]

Just letting you members know that I read very carefully and as soon as I identify pro-sexuality or the encouragement of sexual activity, then I stop reading and might avoid any future communications with any pro-sexual member. I can not read pro-sexual content because it's not healthy for me. If you are pro-sexual, then you can reply but I might not read your reply. I welcome asexual and antisexual replies.

I will not communicate with anyone who harasses or criticize me instead of criticizing my antisexuality. You are free to criticize my belief or speech, but do not criticize me: that's very immature, only proving that pro-sexuals have no solid argument and resort to criticizing the speaker instead of his speech.

@Mii Do not underestimate the Almighty's ability to create life.

@Lynx I believe I said some societies, and not all societies, engage in sexual exploitation. And the need for human resources fluctuates over time. At some point, a society might have wanted to decrease a population, including a minority population, but then found some use for such population.

The scariest societies are the ones that use sexual exploitation to produce a lot of humans. Overpopulation occurs. What happens to all those extra humans who can't easily survive due to a lack of resources? Some societies design ways to "dispose" of them, I feel; even with the help of warfare.

My gosh, I'm happy that I'm not driven by the lust and sadomasochism of a modern society where I'd have mindless sex and produce a child. If I have a kid, I'd be through adoption, surrogacy, artificial insemination, reproductive technology, or religious miracles from the Almighty.

@OneOfHis Where I live, marriage costs money. I would not waste my money and rather spend it towards more important things in my life like investing in adoption. Also, marriage puts a lot of sexual pressure on couples, as they are not allowed to have sex with others. I'm not surprised that marital rape exists. Adultery is a criminal offense where I live too; so by avoiding marriage and sex, I avoid being charged with a crime

Some societies go as far as to not flirt with others. Some people assume I'm married and don't want me to compliment them. It's stupid. By avoid sex, I avoid all that stupidity and I get to focus on more important and founded things in my life. I never liked the stupid obstacles of society, especially if they are avoidable.

Some men might need sex but I don't. If a man needs sex, then go marry; else you probably really shouldn't. If you marry, you are likely going to have sex, whether you like sex or not.

Your posts don't seem to me, to be coming from a healthy place.

If reading people say the marriage bed is sanctified by God and thus not evil (a biblical position) is somehow a horrific experience for your mind, then perhaps your having problems that are farther reaching than "sex".

Maybe you should talk to someone about that, find out what's causing these emotions of extreme negativity in regards to martial relations.

 

[EleventhHour]

our posts don't seem to me, to be coming from a healthy place.

I am thinking maybe you mean ... unhealthy place?

 

[Hazelelponi]

I am thinking maybe you mean ... unhealthy place?

No, because I said they don't seem to be coming from a healthy place.

To use unhealthy instead, I would have needed to leave out the "don't" and just say this seems to be coming from an unhealthy place.

Either means the same, but the way I worded it with the word "don't" in play required a positive use instead of a negative use of the word healthy.

I prefer to use more positive wording when writing whenever I can, although sometimes I fall short. It sounds kinder and gentler I think, which is what I try and convey, although it is often difficult in writing to write the way I would sound if I were speaking.

 

[EleventhHour]

No, because I said they don't seem to be coming from a healthy place.

To use unhealthy instead, I would have needed to leave out the "don't" and just say this seems to be coming from an unhealthy place.

Either means the same, but the way I worded it with the word "don't" in play required a positive use instead of a negative use of the word healthy.

I prefer to use more positive wording when writing whenever I can, although sometimes I fall short. It sounds kinder and gentler I think, which is what I try and convey, although it is often difficult in writing to write the way I would sound if I were speaking.

Sorry yes I see it now... my eyes all day on a computer screen.

I completely agree... I just thought it was a typo.

 

[seoulsearch]

It's a good feeling to know that I'm truly independent. It's a feeling of ultimate self-control. Even though the whole world might want me to have sex, I retain my right and freedom to abstain! It's a very beautiful freedom that I hope other men enjoy in their lifetime too. This virgin and celibate is very grateful for the life that the Almighty has bestowed upon him, and would not chance a disease or false sexual conviction to end it.

A man who did not succumb to sexual exploitation. A man that most of the world hated, but who retained his freedom and right to treat women humanely like a brother and not like an object.

Some societies want men to have sex, for the sake of growing armies, labor forces, and resources. I did not bow to such sexual exploitation at women's expense, but rather showed women true love and respect by treating them as a brother. I did not force nor pay a lady or lesbian for any lust, sadomasochism, self-gratification, or sexual exploitation.

I do think I understand a bit of what you're trying to say.

But where is the line between, "For whatever reason, sex (and even the idea of it) doesn't work for me so I'm not going to try seeking it (or even marriage) out," and the Pharisee at the temple who said, "Lord, I praise you that I'm not like all this other dirty sinners our there who actually struggle with wanting to have sex!"

When does something that could be an individual life choice that works out just fine between you and God turn into a form of self-righteous pride in which you see yourself as being morally superior to everyone who (in your eyes) is much weaker than you?

Your entire post seems to say, "Look at me and how strong I am! Look at all the morally superior decisions I make! I'm not like you -- I'm better than all you other weak-willed, lesser human beings, and you should all be admiring my incredible self-discipline!"

It's awesome that you haven't committed any crimes or mistreated or abused anyone just to have sex. That's definitely a wonderful thing.

But how did you get to a point in your life in which you decided to criminalize EVERYTHING having to do with sex? (You're not the only one who thinks this way, but I think you're probably aware of this, as some victims of sexual abuse also arrive at the types of conclusions you are stating.)

It truly saddens me to think of someone who has been hurt or has seen enough hurt to think that making sex evil for everyone under any circumstance except as a strict procreation ritual is the only answer.

 

[williamfinch]

@Hazelelponi I'm not talking about marriage but rather sex. In fact, I'm not married so I definitely shouldn't be having any sex, right? And so my antisexuality is justified since I'm not married, eh?

Did you know that people are murdered for having sex? I bet more people have died from having sex than those who haven't. Of course, some women have been killed for rejecting the sexual advances of men, which is disturbing and sad.

But did you know that a wife was to be burned to death or killed for having sex with any man other than her husband? But if she were to say that it was rape, only the man would be burned or killed? Do you think some women were pressured to lie about a sexual affair, to escape being burned to death or killed? My gosh!

Blessed is my virginity, celibacy, and self-control!

Sadly, some men don't even need religion to justify killing their wives who've had extramarital affairs. They don't care if they go to jail because they will tell the inmates that "my wife cheated on me." Not many inmates would be offended by such men. Some inmates and prison guards might even sympathize and give privileges to such men.

I avoid ALL of that because I don't need sex. Even if I marry, I wouldn't want to have sex. But if I marry, I'd have to have sex whether I want to or not, because of the sexual pressure associated with marriage. So I don't marry. I'm a happy celibate and virgin.

Think of it this way: I am sparing any lady who would've had an extramarital affair with me, if I were married.

Some men need sex, and some men don't. I don't need sex.


@seoulsearch I agree with the pride thing. But unlike the Pharisee which were somewhat of a majority or respected people, I am more of a minority. I pride my antisexuality, as a response to the discrimination that I face as an antisexual. But I've only been antisexual for two months so far. And I am finding ways and value in exercising antisexuality without communicating with others, as I'm noticing that a lot of people are uncomfortably pro-sexual in conversations.

People pride their pro-sexuality, even men who brag about having sex and women who brag about their partners. So I feel that I should not be deprived of the right to brag about my antisexuality, just as they brag about their sexuality. But for the sake of my religion, I will try to humble myself a bit more and not be as those prideful people are. I already know that my antisexuality has many benefits that need not be bragged about, like less chance of diseases, false convictions, and social complications.

 

[Mii]

Why would any human put a Dislike on a post encouraging potential rape victims to reach out for help through friends? The discouragement and discredit of rape victims is only a product of those who encourage sex above the wellbeing of women, I sadly believe. I've read so many articles where rape victims were discouraged from reaching out. And a marriage ring does not excuse rape: rape is rape regardless if the rapist is a husband. I know some husbands don't rape their wives, but some do.

You do know there is a scripture regarding marital relations that says not to deprive one another except for fasting and prayer.

The NASB says deprive and the KJV says defraud.

The reason you get a dislike is because you are suggesting it is unreasonable for a husband to "require" intimacy or for a wife to "require" intimacy. I'll quote the NASB version (which has a bit softer language, although it does leave out fasting unfortunately)

"³The husband must fulfil his duty to his wife and likewise also the wife to her husband. ⁴The wife does not ave authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. ⁵Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." 1 Corinthians 7:3-5.


If you'd like to look up the KJV for this one it is a little more "pointed".

So "locking yourself in a bathroom" as if he were some raging animal by default for wanting to have "relations" when the she does not does not make him a rapist. If she were consecrating herself in prayer and fasting this is by mutual consent. Otherwise either party could enforce their own will in a situation as higher than another's. Obviously if something were physically dangerous an argument could be made.

You can also understand how abuse can occur within relationships where one party or another "withholds" relations in order to punish or subjugate the other. This is unscriptural as per the above scripture. This would less commonly be seen in men toward the woman, but he could easily "


You also stated that you "won't die if you don't have sex". Can you potentially understand how this statement makes little sense in the larger argument of our mortality and what will and will not cause death in each individuals life? A myriad of factors contribute to death and only the Lord can see them all, it comes across as impractical to say that. While I would give the self-same advice to a young person that feels that they absolutely must release "tension", if one were to die from it (not through biology but from circumstantial factors) then that is in the Lord's hands. It seems impossible to say personally. I think a death maintaining celibacy would be worthy indeed and I'm certain this has occurred in our history, but that is something of another matter.


I'm glad that I read the last post that you made before replying, because you aren't too far into this lifestyle and I would be interested to hear a little more on how you have come to this decision of celibacy.


See if your posts were based on the life of a celibate and the pitfalls of one seeking to submit one's flesh in that area and rise above and commit oneself to the Lord then I would offer advise as well as ways that I have navigated around sexuality and maintaining not only personal purity (I do certainly succumb at times) but also to somehow breath fresh air in what can seem at times a "cesspit of flesh" then perhaps we could have a discussion.

VERY FEW people will ever understand that quest and I would caution you that there are occultic practices that align with asexuality as well.

If you are 100% certain that your decision is of the Lord and not a deeper work of the flesh then I would strongly encourage you to not attempt to be condescending toward others that are interested in marriage or are married (Holy matrimony ofc). This is the primary system.

It is not needed to point out where people have erred in the world, or even those that warp Holy matrimony with untamed lusts and are unregenerate masquerading as believers.

That is akin to calling the excesses that have been done throughout history in the name of Christianity as Holy.

Some rather insidious things can occur when a person forcefully disassociates sexually. That is not freedom or overcoming, that is human effort and it will crop up in other areas. I've noticed this myself in the mind. I've learned that it is unwise and dangerous to repress sexuality, but rather to address it in healthy ways, even if chastity for life is one's eventual destination. I won't get into specifics but there are times when I think similar to you (although personally and not regarding others) and all I can say is be certain that it is NOT disassociation and is indeed the Lord's doing, otherwise much like not going to the bathroom there will be some internal damage mentally and spiritually, so just bear that in mind and pray about it.

Also we are to boast in the Lord, not in our own selves. I'm not condemning you here, just read how Paul boasts of his fleshly accomplishments (he was also celibate) and says that he has reason to boast more than anyone but that's not how we as believers ought to behave. I'll try and find the scripture references and mention you so you can take a look. I'm sure you've heard it before, but I just recently heard it on a radio sermon and reminders are usually helpful.


You have not presented any examples of Godly marriages that are to be commended and I find that disturbing. I've certainly found some in my lifetime though not many that have encouraged me by my own marital standards (if and when the Lord chooses). So it's out there man, and I find that the Lord will bring those people across your path eventually. Actual units. People that are one flesh, operating in agreement with the spirit together. A covenanted holy union.

It exists and it is worth striving for and it is certainly inappropriate to condemn people who cultivate such a walk.

 

[Godsgirl83]

@Godsgirl83 Do not let your husband force you to have sex. If you don't want to have sex, then lock yourself in some room or bathroom and call a friend to visit. I've heard of marital rape. No husband should be forcing you to have sex, and it should only be through consent.

oh WOW where in the world.... what in the world brought this on??????


wow oh wow is somebody ever having a crazy time misinterpreting what has been said.....

it should only be through consent.

Well, if one is married then the consent has been given....…

(of course, I've only been married ONCE for over a decade to {at the risk of sounding redundant here} THE SAME MAN so I better go and check the "rules" and "laws" for a biblical marriage and INTIMACY within it with a forum user who claims they are a "single male"......
you know, just in case when the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY told me that my husband is the man I'm to marry and spend the rest of my earthly life with..... that I somehow missed it here.......

next comment is not meant to offend anyone or cause shock.... just a HAPPILY MARRIED WIFE making a HAPPILY MARRIED comment :

Do not let your husband force you to have sex. If you don't want to have sex, then lock yourself in some room or bathroom and call a friend to visit

if anyone needs to run and hide in this household/marriage, it isn't me

 

[Godsgirl83]

(meant to add to this, but missed the 5 minute mark since it's morning and marriage + sex = children and children = busy mornings.....

oh WOW where in the world.... what in the world brought this on??????


wow oh wow is somebody ever having a crazy time misinterpreting what has been said.....


Well, if one is married then the consent has been given....…

(of course, I've only been married ONCE for over a decade to {at the risk of sounding redundant here} THE SAME MAN so I better go and check the "rules" and "laws" for a biblical marriage and INTIMACY within it with a forum user who claims they are a "single male"......
you know, just in case when the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY told me that my husband is the man I'm to marry and spend the rest of my earthly life with..... that I somehow missed it here.......

next comment is not meant to offend anyone or cause shock.... just a HAPPILY MARRIED WIFE making a HAPPILY MARRIED comment :


if anyone needs to run and hide in this household/marriage, it isn't me

You do know there is a scripture regarding marital relations that says not to deprive one another except for fasting and prayer.

"³The husband must fulfil his duty to his wife and likewise also the wife to her husband. ⁴The wife does not ave authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. ⁵Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." 1 Corinthians 7:3-5.

I can testify that as a busy mom, there are days that I'm cranky and crabby... and when bed time rolls around all I want to think about is ME and what I WANT/NEED.......
Well, I"ll try and keep this comment "clean and appropriate...…( however, ladies I would have no problem addressing this further in the ladies forum...… )
I have had nights that for whatever my reasons. the Lord brings that verse to mind...….
and if it is in the written WORD then it is there for a REASON...…..