its funny how half (or more) comments on this thread are derailed...#juuust thinking
I'll get it back on rail if possible.
I don't think men should have to "put their big boy pants on" because its insulting. It uses gender roles and shaming language to basically prod men to go up to a girl and asking them out, which will fail miserably because he never had the confidence in the first place. She will see this shy, slumped over man, nervously asking her on a date. The unattractiveness that oozes out of that will get him rejected, and he'll go back to his corner feeling more hurt and rejected than before.
So what advice do we give him? Tell him he's not a man, put his "big boy pants on" and go do it again.. and again... and again.. and again.
Its not loving, its not kind, it shows no empathy for him or his feelings. But boys aren't suppose to have feelings right? They are just suppose to be super-man, riding lifes waves and being their for women 120% of the time.
Reality check, men are human beings with hearts. We are strong on the outside, yet soft on the inside and all men already know this, but they already have their cuddle bug so they tow the same lines over and over again, striking at his heart, telling him he isn't worthy of the title manhood because he hasn't developed his confidence yet.
I say instead of culturally shaming these men, that rather why not go talk to them, find out why they are not confident and help them boost it. You can boost it in a variety of ways. Eating healthy, looking good, working out, developing your social skills.
Telling a man to "man up" is a cop-out from really giving him the help he needs, and this is how bitter broken men are born. And yet we as a society then complain about it? We produce these men in mass, then bicker how they are broken in the first place.. and put a rubber sticker of "man upz" on it in hopes of fixing it.
Truth is, no one cares about these men, its their problem and that IS the fundemental problem. No one cares or loves them, and that is why we will always have these men. We treat them with the swimming pool effect. Its sink or swim, throw them in the water, then walk away. No help, no guidance, no true empathy.
Its cold, its loveless, and it does not build character. We reap what we sow.