Okay...*takes a deep breath, and prays real quick, Lord help me be calm, as this person doesn't understand things and has had many bad experiences with people that are survivors.*...
Liam, I can totally understand your desires. That's perfectly normal. However, I don't feel you have any right whatsoever to sit there and say ''get use to it''. We SURVIVORS do NOT use our past for ''attention'' or for ''sympathy''. Once someone recovers, or at least starts the recovery process, they learn and grow. It's completely selfish to say such things about us. Those that are still victims, are that way for different reasons.
Top two reasons: They haven't found the right person to help them, they don't trust in God enough on things...and, they haven't gotten past the nightmares and things enough to open up about it. Most if not all that have ever been a victim, were threatened. Most common threat made is ''you will not tell anyone, or you will regret it'' then they're told what will happen if they tell.
Again I'll say, you CAN'T judge, assume things, hold a grudge, etc. etc. from YOUR own experience. I again apologize that you've had to deal with those things and people...however, not all are like that. They're still lost, and tangled up in a horrible, never ending nightmare. I promise if you had ever gone through things, you'd have a totally different attitude and perspective on this matter. It's not like you just wake up one day, say oh well someone's going to abuse me, but it's okay, I'll live...then wake up and say poof! I'm healed, I'm over it oh yeah! that DOES NOT happen.
I mean what I say, in a calm manner, not disrespectful, so please keep that in mind. You must see the picture from BOTH sides. As a non-victim/survivor, and as a survivor. Anyhow....I'm going to stop for now....but in all honesty, most are totally over the whole ordeal until they get married, and then truly learn trust. Many go out there thinking sex equals love...when it doesn't....they end up going around sleeping with anyone and everyone trying to numb and hide, even rid the memories, pain, etc.Then eventually they get sick of it, they can't take it anymore. Finally they give in, and they do what they should have done long ago, call on God.
Us survivors are not looking for sympathy or attention, we're strong, we're passionate, we're here to help others, to keep them from making mistakes we or others may have made. Now that's not to say we went and put our self in a position we knew was dangerous and things would, or might happen. That means, after being a victim, some do those things. Please keep this in mind, please take it to heart. Don't allow others to harden your heart because they have yet to overcome being a victim, and become a survivor. I will admit SOME will seek attention, and sympathy, BUT that's because they're in the beginning stages of healing. They go about it in the wrong manner.
I'm going to really pray for you, that God will take away all bitterness, pain, memory, etc. from how others have done you. Sounds like to me, you're a victim yourself here...not of abuse like this, BUT of abuse of someone that can't yet get delivered. That is VERY possible. Victims, will make victims of innocent people...dragging them down, etc. if they have no guidance, and things on how to deal with all that's going on.
Okay I'm done for now. God bless.
