Hey Everyone,
How do you feel about meeting someone you've been crushing online in person? Would you have any specific concerns or fears?
This topic is something I'd thought about for a while and another poster was able to better put into words some of the things I'd been thinking of.
A few of my concerns would be:
1. Would he even... like who I am in person? I currently don't have a CC crush but there are several users I'd like to meet and become real life friends. Now, if by some chance, something worked out with a special someone, great, but in the meantime, here are some things I think about.
For some reason, I've been told that I look better in person than pictures (apparently I must come across in pictures as a total troll
), but I'd still be a little nervous and insecure.
What if he finds out I'm really not all the clever or funny or even interesting? That all in all, I'm just a very, ordinary plain person with an occasionally off-the-wall view of life...
Which would be especially crushing if he had seemed totally into talking to me... until we actually met... and then he was like, "Uh... nice meeting you..." and promptly found a way to flee the scene.
And if for some reason it was me who no longer felt an attraction to him once we met... How would I handle it gracefully and with as much respect as possible?
2. As Catherder wrote in another thread, while I'd really be looking forward to meeting that special person, at the same time, I'd almost be afraid of hitting it off in person, because if we had an amazing connection and were on opposite sides of the state, country, world... I'd be totally heartbroken that I couldn't spend more time with this astonishingly wonderful person. I hate the feeling of absolute longing for someone due to distance or circumstance and would be afraid feeling that way all the time once I had to leave that person. And I wouldn't want either of us to move UNTIL we'd had plenty of real-life time together.
3. With some things in life... I almost wonder if the fantasy is better than the reality. Sure, I can think about what a fun, awesome pair we might be... without facing any of the harsh realities or heartache.
But overall, depending on the person and the situation, to me, the risk would totally be worth it if it the chance was there to take.
I just might be shaking in my neon-colored sneakers the entire time... but I'm sure I'd get through!
How about the rest of you?
TLDR, following God, truly following God, brings Peace that passes understanding. That peace is worth seeking, more than a meeting with whoever.
I'd like to tell you a little story. This isn't a story about internet dating, internet crushes, or the fear of meeting such a person. This is a story about God's goodness. It is a true story, and one that still amazes me to this day.
Let's set the stage a little. It's the year 2011, nothing particularly special about this year. Kind of a boring year actually, but that means lots of time to spend on CC; lots of new people to meet. The new YouTube room is pretty fun. Sharing music and the occasional sermon with others. Maybe you already guessed it, here comes the girl. She doesn't really stand out, but she's a lot of fun to talk to. Finally the first jump is made, things move out of CC, and then Facebook. Really? That can't be, how can you trust her, what if she just wants to steal your monies? Well, what can it hurt, she lives so far away.
And years go by, talking every couple of days, following each others posts on CC. When suddenly, tragedy strikes. Her sister is very sick and in need of help, but there isn't enough money to pay. Here it comes, stealing the monies! But no, there is trust there now, God is there in that moment. The money is sent, and the healing begins. Ok, a little money to help heal someone, no big deal. She promises to never ask again.
And months go by, and suddenly tragedy strikes again. She is deathly sick, in the hospital for days. The fear starts building, what is happening? Why isn't she getting better? And yet, she doesn't ask for help. God, please heal her! But there is only one way, surgery, expensive surgery. Ok God, are you sure about this? Success! She is healed. She promises to never ask again.
And time goes by, talking daily now. A desire is building, an impossible thought that can't be acknowledged. There is love there. It has been growing all of this time. Slowly at first, but gaining momentum as more and more things are shared. Then the prayers begin. God, you're gonna have to make this very clear. It's so crazy, impossible even. And then peace, peace that grew, and was nurtured by friends and family and pastor. This is real, it's not crazy, it is possible. A relationship, a ring, a promise. But there is still so much more to do. A meeting, in person, is the only way.
And so, on that January day, I leave the cold frozenness of the midwest on a journey unlike any that I'd taken before. From the US to the Philippines. To a world so different that it might as well be mars. But my Fiancee is there, living on Mars, and praising and worshipping God there. As we first meet, we hug, and awkwardly exchange greetings. For the first time that little fear starts to return. How silly we were. On the way home, we start talking and things suddenly snap into place. It's like we had been together, and I had to take a long trip and had returned home to her. There was absolutely no fear left. She was amazing, together we were more amazing that I ever could have imagined. God brought us together, neither of us had any doubt. Nothing is impossible through God, who made the world and everything in it. Who loves us deeply and knows how to lead us. Good has been so good to me.
Cliche as it may sound, crazy as it would have sounded to me a year or two ago, God does use the internet. When it's not about who or when or how, when it's truly about following God, that is when meeting can happen without fear. In those times, reality can be so much better than fantasy (I couldn't imagine it).
I hope this wasn't too long for you Kim. I hope that God continues to bless you and give you peace!