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What was Mariam? Deborah spoke the Word as given her by the Holy Spirit. What she did is part of the Word, that is Jesus Christ, as is all of the Bible. I am hard pressed to find the distinction....Barak was instructed by God through Deborah.
You do know, when I see the name "Barak" I'm hard pressed not to think of the guy heading the US, most known for NOT listening, right? lol But you're right, Deborah spoke and the leader listened. She did not speak as the leader. Just like Aaron spoke for Moses to the Pharaoh. That's the difference. That is the distinction.
I'm not saying women should be seen, but not heard. We most definitely should be heard. BUT it isn't our final say when it comes to matters of the Church. God gave that job to men. We are the keepers of men. We take care of them so they can do their jobs. And we are an important voice. We simply aren't THE voice when it comes to dealing with Church issues. (Thank you, Lord, for that!)
Actually, read closely and you can see why it was a good idea not to have Mariam in the top role. We tend to go with our feelings over doing what God wants. (So do men, but a little less often. lol)