Single and alone?

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J

JustViv

Guest
#1
#1
[FONT=&quot]Sometimes when we are single and all by ourselves, we tend to limit what we do, I think. Though I'm sick and tired being alone, the world has not stop turning. While life goes on even there's lots of hurts and pain in life, there are things that just have to get going. [/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]What have you achieved being single and alone or rather what are you looking forward to achieving in the next few months?[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]For me, I've got the keys to my own unit and renovation is scheduled to start coming Friday! Woo hoo! What's next? I'm working on my final assignment, though I have not started this weekend but I will make sure I start working on it tomorrow. I'm target to graduate this October with Master of Christian Studies.[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]What's after all that? I guess, it's time for me to start promoting my catering business? Yeah, I think so....

How about you?[/FONT]
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#2
Aug 13, 2014
26,739
8,975
113
#2
Yay for graduating with a master! :D

Me, I'm not that focused I guess. Or maybe I just don't have anything I want to change right now. I'm happy as-is. Making soundtracks for songs I want to sing, helping friends with random computer stuff, going to work, coming home, preaching the occasional sermon if the pastor is out... I like my life.

Though I am planning to get two kittens sometime between now and a week and a half from now. A boy and a girl. I'm getting them spayed/neutered but for a cat socially it still seems to matter.
 
B

BurlyCarl

Guest
#3
#3
During my time of being put though the ringer. Recovering and yes life moves forward. It moves forward different. When your numb and you cant get past the love lost. You are on auto pilot. I have achieved alot though education. Advancing in my career. Having friends and family. Right now as I write this from the 18th floor of down town St louis apartments in its rainy haze. Staring at the Mississippi river. When your not connected with someone or lost someone you were connected with. Life and achieving abundance will not matter. I have set goal after goal. Only to find myself waiting in a cycle to set another goal.

I have filled my life with church activities and studies. Various other activities. People know my name I place a smile for them. What they dont see is actually how I feel. Being in a room full of people and being million miles away is probably one of the worst feelings in the world. I deal with it often. I have even been to Counseling. Been though the doping prescriptions. Its is just a bandaid to the problem.

Im just being honest. I hate relational love. I dont hate relationships. If i recall. When has love of this world outside of God, ever been kind to me? Love of this world and hopes of someone actually following though and keeping their word. Has never happend. It has never been kind. I hate it. Before someone makes a religious refernce. Dont. I have read, and listend. Placed myself in self improvements spiritually physically educationally and financially. It did nothing but leave me lonely.

Out of all these sucesses. I am not granted the one thing. I have made friends galore. Ended friendships. Friendzones. Ended friendzones. I am denied here a life partner. I hate love. It is irrational. In my prayers me and Jesus and God argue and fight about it all the time. Alot of it is disagreement. We cannot agree. God makes me mad about being lonely and love. In turn I tell him how I feel about it and desires. Proven though what has transpires. Its a friendly disagreement. I have resoluted to hate for worldly love. Because I have been denied of it. I have all of the wonderful garnishments of what a man is supposed to be. Its not good enough for someone.
 
Mitchell1989

Mitchell1989

Member
#4
May 25, 2016
77
1
0
#4
I've had a few good things happen:
I just moved into a house on Aug. 1st
Got a new (used) car last week
I start my Masters program on the 22nd of this month
Summer has been fun!
 
W

wwjd_kilden

Guest
#5
#5
- I moved to Scotland and stayed there for three years before moving back to Norway.
- I applied for a job as far north as you can possibly get on the mainland of Norway
(Didn't get it, but would have moved if I had gotten it)

both would have been a bit more complicated if I had someone else to consider
 
M

MadParrotWoman

Guest
#6
#6
What most single people do not seem to grasp is that one can be lonely in a marriage too and I believe that is far worse.
 
W

weezer

Guest
#7
#7
JustViv said:
Sometimes when we are single and all by ourselves, we tend to limit what we do, I think. Though I'm sick and tired being alone, the world has not stop turning. While life goes on even there's lots of hurts and pain in life, there are things that just have to get going.


What have you achieved being single and alone or rather what are you looking forward to achieving in the next few months?


For me, I've got the keys to my own unit and renovation is scheduled to start coming Friday! Woo hoo! What's next? I'm working on my final assignment, though I have not started this weekend but I will make sure I start working on it tomorrow. I'm target to graduate this October with Master of Christian Studies.


What's after all that? I guess, it's time for me to start promoting my catering business? Yeah, I think so....

How about you?
Click to expand...
I too felt tired of being alone, as though God wasn't listening to me when I prayed for Him to send a woman into my life, but looking back I now realize that God wasn't ignoring me, He was saving me from trouble and heartache. I realize now that singleness is a time to become the God fearing Christian man that God wants me to be. That doesn't just happen overnight or because you suddenly have a girlfriend. It takes time, discipline and patience.

Now rather than feeling sad and alone about being single, I thank God for not sending a woman into my life before. I wasn't ready then, and I still don't feel ready now, but I know in time I will one day become the man God wants me to be, and the man my future wife deserves. I know it's not easy being single and it can be hard sometimes, but just remember that it isn't a punishment, it is a blessing. God is allowing us to change our hearts and minds, to make Him the priority in our life, and to grow closer to Him, and then if God wills it, He will send somebody into our life.

Until that happens however, like I said, continue to grow in your faith, make God your priority, and continue to pray to Him. Continue to tell him when you're feeling sad and alone, and He will fill you with the Holy Spirit and remind you that you are not alone, that He is always with you and always loves you. God bless!
 
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AbigailZeke

AbigailZeke

Beloved
#8
Mar 11, 2016
3,055
242
63
Singapore
abigail.pro
#8
- I moved to Singapore, from Philippines, and have lived here for close to 3 years now.
- I had my first boyfriend xD and had my first breakup.
- I got born again for the second time xD and this time I finally have a relationship with my Savior
- I started doing ministry that I really loved
- I'm about to quit it though because...!
- I started school last month, I'm switching to an almost entirely new career, so I start from the beginning and I'm getting my diploma, hopefully will get a scholarship to finish the degree by next year.
- I'm scheduled for a promotion by the end of this year. xD
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#9
Mar 26, 2014
4,414
2,405
113
#9
I've never been one to be afraid to go out and do things alone, though there are some things like eating out that just seem silly or pointless for me to do alone. But I did find during my most recent major life transition, that I really wished there were someone in my life who could have been there for both sides of the transition. Someone who could really understand because they'd been in both the world I came from and the world I lived in for the past several years. But God has provided, if not the perfect someone to be a partner in it all, at least several someones who've been there for me, kind of get it, and have been wonderful supports. I just have to constantly remind myself that I'm not as alone as I sometimes think or feel I am.
 
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BurlyCarl

Guest
#10
#10
I gave up on praying for someone. I dont think what I am seeking exsist here. It only feathers away in the wind and getting my hopes up. Yeah pray for Something that is not gonna happen. Yeah i understand anyone married or not being lonely. I stopped praying and asking.
 
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Sillychick723

Guest
#11
#11
There's no simple answers to why the loneliness can be so intense other than the fact that we were never meant to be alone. I feel the sting of loneliness some days & yet I don't feel incomplete or empty. It took a while to get to this place & an intense amount of trust in God. I had to learn to praise God when I didn't feel like it, worship him when I was hurting and just plain get to the point that he is more than enough for me. I still feel lonely at times but I'm taking this time in my singleness to work on me. I pray that God gives you the true desires of your ❤ even though you've stopped asking.
 
Dino246

Dino246

Senior Member
#12
Jun 30, 2015
25,076
13,611
113
#12
Hey JustViv, nice to 'see' you again. :)

A large part of my recovery has been in simply fixing things around my house. I have repainted most of it on the inside, after making some necessary fixes in drywall and the like. I've just finished putting in a patio where there was an eyesore. The garden is a little overgrown, but one large section of it has been renovated. I'm heading out on my second solo camping trip. I'm trying to expand the world I experience as a single person. I may plan a longer trip, maybe even a hot vacation or a bucket list visit somewhere.

For me, being single has certain freedoms, but financial freedom is not one of them. So many of the things I might do simply aren't options for me at present. I'll stretch out farther as I feel inclined... and can afford it.
 
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SweetSue

Guest
#13
#13
Since I've been single(almost 3 years), I have gone on four missions trips, do weekly door to door evangelism, teach Sunday School, just to name a few.
 
Born_Again

Born_Again

Senior Member
#14
Nov 15, 2014
1,585
129
63
#14
cinder said:
I've never been one to be afraid to go out and do things alone, though there are some things like eating out that just seem silly or pointless for me to do alone. But I did find during my most recent major life transition, that I really wished there were someone in my life who could have been there for both sides of the transition. Someone who could really understand because they'd been in both the world I came from and the world I lived in for the past several years. But God has provided, if not the perfect someone to be a partner in it all, at least several someones who've been there for me, kind of get it, and have been wonderful supports. I just have to constantly remind myself that I'm not as alone as I sometimes think or feel I am.
Click to expand...
I actually go out to eat alone quite frequently!! I read something on my phone or just relax and think. :) I was hesitant about it at first, but have come to enjoy it.
 
M

mar09

Senior Member
#15
Sep 17, 2014
4,927
1,259
113
#15
hi viv,
did u say ur starting a catering business? havent heard from u again recently... hope u drop by again.
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#16
#16
Being single, I have had the opportunity to get to know myself. I'm learning how to like myself. Being single, I can focus on the important things in life that will actually bear fruit, like having the past few years to care for my father and get to know him, and to pursue my education to it's finality. Being single, I have been able to reassess my feelings towards the opposite sex and accept that I just don't really like them beyond the platonic. Being single, I've been able to indulge in my hobbies and spend time doing things I like to do instead of farming out my time to a larger group. Being single, I have had ample opportunity for quiet reflection and have been able to make sense of the inner monologue in my head and filter it. Being single, I have been able to get a sense of my own worth to me, not as it is through someone else's eyes.
 
A_Friend_In_Christ

A_Friend_In_Christ

Senior Member
#18
Aug 13, 2013
965
8
18
#18
Just because other people are hurting does not make our pain go away. It still is there. It still matters.
 
A_Friend_In_Christ

A_Friend_In_Christ

Senior Member
#19
Aug 13, 2013
965
8
18
#19
Some people may enjoy a solitary, isolated life. Society calls these people loners. Sad but true. I am not a hermit. I want to fellowship with real, live, breathing people and not be content with patting myself on the back because I like being alone and talking to people mostly by computer...

What's your take?

:D
 
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Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#20
#20
A_Friend_In_Christ said:
Some people may enjoy a solitary, isolated life. Society calls these people loners. Sad but true. I am not a hermit. I want to fellowship with real, live, breathing people and not be content with patting myself on the back because I like being alone and talking to people mostly by computer...

What's your take?

:D
Click to expand...
I like the term "loner". It fits me. I also like "hermit". That also is appropriate.
 
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